Bargains with Messenger and Lord
Never in my wildest dreams did I think this Peleus would one day stand face-to-face with Hermes, the god of messengers.
"Hmm…."
Just looking at the handsome god before me drew a quiet gasp of admiration. He wasn't some mere errand boy for Zeus. No, he ruled over a slew of prime domains: god of travelers, commerce, thieves, quick wits and cunning, measures and invention. Among the Twelve Olympians, the youngest by far, yet none walked a straighter path to glory. There was endless chatter about Zeus's successor, but without standing out too much, wasn't he the closest contender?
Even so, as our conversation dragged on, Hermes couldn't hide his growing bewilderment.
"So, you're dissatisfied with the punishment for Lady Artemis?"
His words carried a probing edge, like he was asking for the second time. I nodded.
"Of course. If I go easy, I'm worried it'll come back to bite you one day, Lord Hermes. When you push someone down, you have to shove hard. That way, they never get back up."
I spoke bluntly, knowing full well how thin family bonds ran among the Olympians. Plus, after trading words directly with Hermes, I figured this much was safe.
"Peleus, a tree falls to repeated chops. Swing too hard at once, and you just snap your axe."
"Wise words, my lord. But this time, it's possible. I've got the perfect scheme lined up…."
I trailed off deliberately. He was the god of cunning, after all. This had to pique his interest.
"Ho?"
Sure enough, my bold claim lit a spark in his eyes.
"Peleus, I thought this matter settled here. I arranged this meeting to reward your clever display, nothing more. But you're saying there's something bigger?"
"There's a saying: it ain't over till it's over."
"You mean to see it through to the bitter end."
I nodded and laid out my demand to Hermes.
"Naturally. And you mentioned a reward today? Sorry, but I'll politely decline."
"Why? Gods don't hand out ordinary gifts or punishments."
"Simple. I want something better. Hold off on that prize until I've driven Artemis out for good."
"What? Hahaha!"
Hermes clapped like he'd heard the joke of the century, roaring with laughter.
"Peleus, you're beyond expectations. Bold, audacious—a man fit for great deeds. Coming down to earth to meet you was the right call."
"Does it look different from down here?"
To my surprise, Hermes nodded with uncharacteristic seriousness.
"It does. Vastly. Gazing down from the heavens is one thing; facing someone eye-to-eye is another. You catch their expressions, their resolve, their mindset—everything transmits. Artemis probably slipped because she viewed you from afar like some insignificant worm. Never realized the danger up close."
"By the time this is done, she won't forget me even if she tries. That's why I have to shove her hard. Incurring a goddess's grudge terrifies a mortal like me."
"That hardly looks like a terrified face."
Chuckling, Hermes downed a cup of wine and extended his hand, as if urging me to spill the plan.
"Peleus, if Artemis doesn't just get house arrest but falls completely? That'd be news for the ages—worth more than any prize I offered here. Truth be told, I'm rooting for her downfall."
"Your interest in a lowly worm like me? I'm deeply grateful. Then allow me to share my plan."
I started with the key premise.
"Zeus punished Artemis in a fit of rage, but he'll want the full story. He'll reach out through dream-world contacts, no doubt."
"Spot on, Peleus."
"But the dream world is vast—even local gods can't scour it all. Contacting from Olympus? Predictably futile. Zeus might dig up something, but not enough to satisfy."
I phrased it respectfully for the king of gods' dignity, but I was certain he'd strike out. Zeus had interdimensional ties, sure, but Selene's affair wasn't that simple. He'd start by bribing the gatekeepers, but they hadn't even seen Selene inside the Secret Book. Hell, they probably didn't know I'd met her at all. To them, the Interstellar Lord just blocked my way home—that was it.
"You'd exploit that?"
"Yes. When Zeus hits a wall investigating, subtly recommend a dream-world heavyweight."
"Who?"
"The Interstellar Lord."
"What?"
Hermes couldn't mask his shock. And why not? The Interstellar Lord was a colossal figure.
"He's dangerously unpredictable. You know that?"
"I do. But only someone of that caliber can reveal the full truth to Zeus."
"Zeus will hesitate to contact him. No one wants to face that unknown horror."
That's why I added the hook.
"What if someone nudges him from the side?"
"Hmm…."
Hermes didn't dismiss it outright. He knew our king of gods had thin ears—especially to a silver tongue like his.
"What do you gain if the Interstellar Lord meets Zeus? How does that topple Artemis?"
Hermes was sharp as ever. But he was missing the crucial premise: my deal with the Interstellar Lord. No matter how perceptive, he couldn't guess that. Even his high opinion of me saw only a fraction.
"Allow me to explain that now."
I laid out the scheme calmly. Hermes's face filled with astonishment.
"You're insane. Using an otherworldly titan in your plot?"
"Great deeds are always done by the mad, no?"
I tossed back some wine with a chuckle. Hermes looked utterly dumbfounded.
As Hermes departed, he glanced back repeatedly with a bizarre expression. No need to ask—it was the face of a man wondering just what the hell I was.
"Didn't you just make him wary?"
The Secret Book queried. I shook my head. Fair point, but it was time to go all-in.
"No choice. To get Zeus talking to the Interstellar Lord, I need Hermes's help."
The forbidden tome noted Zeus's personality: immense power, but cautious to a fault. He'd probe Selene's matter but balk at a dream-world behemoth like the Interstellar Lord. Hermes's eloquence was essential.
"If I don't crush Artemis now, I'm done for. Even a fool like her will grind me to dust after this. Fighting a god? I could stake everything and still barely win. If Hermes eyes me warily now, so be it."
"A small price, then."
I nodded and re-entered the dream world via Endymion. Time to meet the Interstellar Lord for this plan.
Eyes shut, then open: pitch-black void, a marble path unfurling. The dream-world bypass.
I strolled along until spotting stairs floating afar. I greeted them.
"Greetings, gatekeepers."
They scowled fiercely but turned away, unable to retort. They knew of my pact with the Interstellar Lord—a far greater being. No more high-handed nonsense.
Grinning, I called out again.
"We'll cross paths often now. How about a proper hello?"
Finally, an explosive reply.
[Watch your tongue and show respect, human! How dare you address gods so rudely!]
I let it slide past my ears. They weren't friends anyway.
"Heh, some folks just get crankier with age. Talking about you lot, I suppose."
[Insane fool! That's no way to speak to gods! Have you lost your mind?!]
"Quiet down. This body has business with the great 'Interstellar Lord.' Don't bother me—I'm a busy man. Ahem!"
I strutted off, hands clasped behind, swaggering down the marble. Far off, their long beards quivered in rage. Livid, but they couldn't touch me—not with the Interstellar Lord's face at stake.
"Oh, right—you know this, but the Interstellar Lord guaranteed my safety here. Long as I stick to the path."
They knew, so they just trembled at my taunts. Even if I asked after their parents, they were powerless.
"Take care, then. Gatekeeping ain't easy, huh? Like my house servants! Kahahahaha!"
Still sore from last time they flung me out. Laughing it off felt damn good. The best laughs are mocking ones, aren't they?
"Ahem! Off I go, Lord Peleus."
Strutting audibly, I pressed on. At the path's end gleamed a new emerald door—swirling black smoke like a void puncture. Portal to the Interstellar Lord's domain.
I stepped through without hesitation.
Black sun blazing: the absolute's lair.
[Bearer of god-slaying fate. Nothing achieved yet—why seek me?]
The Interstellar Lord sounded puzzled, not annoyed. Stars near his shadowed face twinkled brighter, intrigued.
"A god doesn't have to die now for the deal to count."
[What?]
His tone dripped confusion at my intent.
"In short: how about some advance payment?"
[Advance? Kahahaha!]
He bellowed in disbelief, the whole space thundering like a drum.
[You amuse greatly. Such insolence I'd normally crush, but it entertained—so forgiven. No promises on the advance, but speak your piece.]
"Truly generous. My thanks."
Just getting this cosmic horror's ear was huge. But I needed more.
"Soon, mighty one, Zeus of Olympus will contact you."
[Zeus?]
"Yes. To uncover Selene's truth. When he does, lend a hand."
Now he grasped it, but toyed with me.
[What aid do you seek?]
I planned to enrage Zeus.
"Simple. Make him learn every failure of Artemis. Not just facts—mock him directly. Let him feel the unparalleled shame of it all, for his daughter's sake."