Vampire Till I Die (3)

It was the ultimate nectar.

Like an oasis discovered in the parched sands of a desert, it sent an electrifying shiver coursing through every fiber of her being, delivering a rush of overwhelming euphoria.

I thought Coke was the pinnacle of existence.

Yet neither Coca-Cola nor coffee could hold a candle to this. Strength surged into the hands clutching the shoulders beneath her, pinning down the desperately struggling figure with relentless force. Drowning in sheer bliss, her dilated pupils lost all focus.

“Aaah!”

Throwing her head back, right at the moment she threw her eyes wide open to the crashing crescendo of pure ecstasy—

“Ah.”

Her consciousness snapped back into place.

With supreme, vital nectar finally flooding a vessel starved of nourishment, her severed rationality reasserted itself. Only after belatedly turning her head to survey her surroundings did Erzsebet grasp the reality of the situation: she was straddling a pale man, her fangs buried deep within his shoulder.

Instinctively, Erzsebet recognized who he was.

“Judddak?”

It was the forum’s supreme administrator, Judddak himself.

I got sucked dry.

This wasn't a metaphor. I was literally drained.

If I post this, it’d hit the Hall of Fame in seconds, wouldn’t it?

The idle netizen impulse drifted naturally across my mind. Though of course, there wasn't a snowball's chance in hell. They'd just downvote me into oblivion and tell me to go touch grass and eat a bowl of rice. Still, the fact that such useless nonsense was running through my head meant I was still among the living.

At least I didn't turn into a vampire either.

Apparently, getting your blood drained in this world didn't automatically infect you with vampirism. As I lay trembling on the cold stone floor, haggard and emaciated from the massive loss of fluids, a melodious, crystalline voice trickled down into my ears.

“...I’m sorry.”

Turning my heavy head, I saw the lethargic vampire perched atop a colossal throne that dwarfed her petite frame. She had curled herself into a tight, miserable ball, looking remarkably contrite—an oddly pathetic sight for an apex predator.

“It’s just... I went so long without drinking any blood, I think my mind completely snapped.” She offered the excuse in a meek, trailing whisper.

To summarize: her prolonged radio silence on the gallery and her sudden frenzied assault on my jugular had all stemmed from acute nutritional deficiency.

“Wait, why though?” I asked, genuine bewilderment cutting through my exhaustion. ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠Why would the progenitor of all vampires suffer from starvation in the first place?

“Blood tastes gross...”

Her reasoning was shockingly ordinary.

“It’s fishy, bitter... sticky... and completely unhygienic. Do you have any idea what kind of nasty things live inside blood?”

“Excuse me, but you’re literally a vampire.”

“Hmph. That’s pure prejudice.”

Hating blood with a passion, Godjukheup—or rather, Erzsebet—had sought her salvation in alternative sources. Namely, modern beverages that shared a similar dark hue but tasted infinitely superior: Coca-Cola and canned coffee. As proof of her lifestyle, the modern refrigerator I had previously sent her stood in the corner, stuffed to bursting with aluminum cans.

Yet processed sugar and caffeine had their biological limits. In the end, severe malnutrition had caught up with her.

“Then why my blood?”

“Judddak’s blood is different. I really wasn’t going to admit this out loud, but...” Leaning forward over the armrest of her massive throne, she lowered her tone as if confiding an ancient cosmic mystery. “Judddak’s blood tastes better than Coke.”

Was that... supposed to be a compliment?

I shouldn't have stepped through that portal. Just as profound regret began to wash over me, I decided to interrogate her about the question that had been gnawing at my mind.

“By the way, how did you even locate me?”

The succubus horn WholesomeModest gave me had never once permitted anyone to track my coordinates. It was powerful enough to nullify divination artifacts from superpowers like the Elven realm or the Adrian Empire. And right now, that very horn was still resting in my inventory, functioning perfectly.

“I didn’t know where you were.”

“Then how did you open that portal right under my nose?”

“It’s like an invitation. I sent it targeting Judddak, but crossing over was entirely your own choice.”

“What kind of nonsense—”

“There’s blood magic specifically for that.”

Erzsebet sauntered over to a dusty corner, hauled out an ancient, leather-bound grimoire, and flipped open the table of contents for me to see.

“Wow.”

The spells were certainly unique to vampires, but every single one of them was crippled by absurd design flaws. Still, tucked deep within the list was the exact witchcraft she had used to drag me here.

“Pretty amazing, isn't it?” Erzsebet puffed out her chest, radiating smug pride.

I gave her a flat look. “Now send me back.”

My life was no longer in immediate danger, and she had satisfied her appetite. There was no reason for me to linger in this haunted ruin, especially when Godjukheup could relapse into an uncontrollable frenzy at any moment. When I made my preemptive demand, she surprisingly gave an obedient nod.

“All right.”

“Oh?”

That was surprisingly cooperative. Relieved that this ordeal was coming to an effortless conclusion, I stared at Erzsebet, and she stared right back at me.

Blink, blink.

Roughly a minute ticked past in dead silence, neither of us moving an inch.

I slowly narrowed my eyes. “...Where’s the portal?”

“I’ll make it, of course. But...”

Wait. The expression on her face was morphing into something unsettling. Tilting her head sideways, the lucidity in Godjukheup's crimson irises began to dissolve into an eerie glaze.

“Do you really have to leave right now?”

“Hey, wait a minute.”

“Stay with me a little longer. There are plenty of guest rooms prepared here. About three hundred and twelve of them.”

“My cozy bunker is a hundred times better, thanks.”

“Fine, then. Let’s just stay together for a hundred years.”

This Assistant Moderator had completely lost her marbles. Her gaze was unfocused, a faint ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠feverish flush dusting her pale cheeks—she had the exact aura of a glutton unwilling to let go of the most exquisite delicacy she had ever tasted. Before my sluggish reflexes could react, she blurred across the floor and clamped both hands hard onto my shoulders.

If she bites me again, I am actually going to die.

Operating entirely on survival instinct, I shoved against her shoulders. Or rather, I tried to shove—despite her slender frame, she possessed the monstrous physical strength of an ancient progenitor. She didn't budge an inch.

Slurp.

Instead, she cocked her head and ran her delicate tongue across the back of my hand, tasting the faint traces of blood on my skin.

A violent shudder ran down my spine.

“No! Stop! Back off! Don't do this!”

“Ehehehe... stay still... I’ll drink your blood very gently this time...”

She wasn't even attempting to hide her cravings anymore. That ghostly porcelain skin of hers was now flushed vivid crimson. Breaking free by raw force was impossible. If yielding blood was inevitable, I only had one card left to play to keep my life.

“I’ll draw it myself!”

“Huh?”

“I swear I won't run, so just back up. If you don't trust me, you can stand over there and watch!”

Drawing it myself with sterile tools was my only salvation. If those fangs punctured my flesh a second time, she would suck me bone-dry down to the final drop. Godjukheup stared up at me for a tense moment, visibly weighing the offer, before reluctantly taking a step back.

“Fine. I’ll wait.”

Fortunately, some scrap of higher cognition remained. She retreated toward her oversized throne, lounging across it sideways with an expectant pout.

“I don’t think I can hold out for very long, though. Please hurry.”

“Sigh...”

I had no other choice. Until I could engineer an escape plan, bleeding myself was the only way to keep my neck intact.

I purchased the kit from the system shop. Who would have thought that watching a random foreign doctor’s self-phlebotomy Shorts back during my shut-in internet days would ever save my life?

“Ugh...”

As I hesitated over the needle, an audible swallow echoed from across the hall. Glancing up, I found Godjukheup draped lazily over the throne, staring at my exposed veins with laser-focused intensity. Tying the rubber tourniquet tightly around my forearm, I followed the kit's instructions and guided the needle into my vein. It didn't hurt as much as I feared, and the vacuum tube filled with surprising ease.

Would staying in the rabbit hole have been better after all?

The thought crossed my mind for half a heartbeat. But I instantly shook my head. Whether trapped with beastfolk or locked in this tomb, every possible timeline ended with me being sucked into an empty husk in one way or another.

I detached the vial and walked over to hand half of the drawn blood to Godjukheup.

“Here.”

“Aah, finally!”

Though it was a modest sample from my first careful extraction, it was more than enough to send her into ecstasy. Tapping her bare feet against the stone platform in sheer delight, Godjukheup cradled the plastic tube as if it were spun gold. Terrified of spilling even a single microdrop, she tipped the rim toward her lips and flicked her tongue at it like an eager kitten.

“Ah... perfection. It's ridiculously delicious...” Eyes squeezing shut, her entire face blossomed into an expression of blissful contentment.

“Glad you're satisfied. Now how about that portal?”

“It tastes so good my brain has completely stopped working.”

“The portal, please...”

“It tastes so heavenly I just want to lock you in this old castle and keep you by my side forever and ever.”

I need to get home and read the backlogged Hall of Fame posts, dammit.

Having drained half the tube in record time, she looked up at me with round, sparkling feline eyes. “Judddak, do you happen to have that thing you gave me last time?”

“What thing...?”

“You know, the fruit coated in hardened sugar... Tanghulu! Yes, that was the name.”

Godjukheup had always been a Sub-Moderator with an extreme sweet tooth rather than a craving for blood. I remembered handing out tanghulu skewers to the Assistant Moderators as a casual perk some time ago, but why bring that up now? Shrugging, I browsed the shop and summoned a candied fruit skewer that had once gripped modern convenience stores.

“What are you going to do with it, anyway?”

Did she just need a sugar rush to accompany her meal? In response, Godjukheup popped open the remaining tube of blood and meticulously drizzled the dark crimson fluid over the glossy sugar shell.

“There... the ultimate vampire snack is complete!”

Over the shining strawberries and grapes, thick red droplets coated the translucent glaze like an artisanal gourmet syrup.

“The ultimate vampire snack...?”

“Blood Tanghulu.”

I was rendered entirely speechless.

Sprawled across a plush mattress, I caught up on the forum threads I had neglected.

Objectively speaking, it was a life most people would envy. Endless gourmet rations, a mattress as soft as a cloud, and zero deadlines or stressful duties hanging over my head.

“What are you reading? Let me see too.”

If not for my captor clinging right against my side and perpetually sizing up my jugular, it would have been absolute paradise.

Three whole days had evaporated. Three nights trapped in this levitating abandoned fortress, completely unable to return to my sanctuary. Tearing my eyes away from the floating gallery interface, I glanced over my shoulder. There lay Godjukheup, her silver hair spilling across the silk sheets like spun moonlight, gazing up at me with lazy affection.

“Isn't it about time you let me go home?”

Yes, incredible as it sounded, I had been captured and indefinitely detained by a silver-haired, red-eyed vampire girl Sub-Mod. Yet for a kidnapper, Godjukheup was absurdly accommodating. She catered to my every comfort, fetching anything I asked for the moment I voiced a preference.

“No can do.”

Everything, that was, except opening that damn portal.

Hoping for her goodwill to set me free was an exercise in futility. I had to devise an escape route from this castle with my own two hands. Unfortunately, with Godjukheup sticking to me like a shadow twenty-four hours a day, executing an escape was currently out of the question.

While I was distracted, the marketplace reset timer had arrived. With an inward sigh, I navigated to the backend admin dashboard and pushed the catalog refresh through.

The second the shop doors opened, the forum users flooded the listings in an unruly swarm, completely forgetting their previous whining. I settled back, expecting another mundane round of administrative commerce—until new comments started firing off at breakneck speed.

Every single food item had sold out within fractions of a second.

“Wait, what the hell was that speed?”

Popular provisions occasionally vanished quickly, but having the entire marketplace emptied of all consumables in a single heartbeat was virtually unheard of.

The alarming detail was that this total monopoly had been repeating itself for days.

By all accounts, the Dwarves were gearing up for all-out war.