Chapter 23
Chapter 23
Despite it being almost 10 PM, there were quite a lot of people in the 24-hour mart in the neighborhood.
A couple buying snacks to go with alcohol, a person in their twenties shopping alone with earphones in, and mothers pushing carts with kids like me.
And a lively song echoing throughout the entire mart.
「Lalala~ lala~ lala~ lalalalala~ lalalalala, lalala!」
Meanwhile, as soon as we entered the mart, Miho's distance naturally became much closer upon seeing so many people moving around.
That was to be expected.
She had met all sorts of strange people today alone and had quite a hard time.
Then, as I picked up a yellow shopping basket instead of a cart, I noticed Miho's gaze fixating somewhere.
"Buy me this, I said buy me this! Waaaah, waaaah!"
There, I could see a son who was old enough to know better throwing a tantrum, breakdancing on the floor.
"Okay, I said okay!"
The mom, though annoyed, firmly held her son's hand and reluctantly put the toy he wanted into the cart.
What a terrible scene.
When I was young, if I acted like that, my mom would have grabbed my ear right on the spot and scolded me. Then my dad would say, "Just buy it for him," and get scolded by my mom too. I remember that.
「You need to know how to firmly say no when something is not okay! It only spoils the child's habits!」
Back then, my mom seemed like a demon, but now that I'm an adult, I know that's absolutely right, a hundred times over.
"Hey, look at that..."
"..."
Looking more closely, I belatedly realized that Miho's gaze was once again fixed on the hands that the mom and son were holding.
Seeing that, my words choked up for no reason.
'So she wasn't looking at the tantrum after all.'
I let out a small sigh and called Miho.
"Hand."
"Huh?"
"Give me your hand. If you get lost here, it'll be a hassle. So, let's shop holding hands."
"...Okay! I got it!"
Miho hesitated for a moment, staring blankly at my hand, then held it tightly with a smile. It felt like a warm, soft marshmallow was fitting snugly into my palm.
Really, damn it was a small and fragile hand.
[Vegetable Section]
"Let's see, we've only been eating unhealthy stuff. I'll think about what to cook later, but for now..."
Carrots, onions, green onions, potatoes... I roughly grabbed a bag of every vegetable I could see and put it in the basket.
Miho, who was watching from the side, kept flinching and shaking her body.
'Didn't they say elves like vegetables more?'
Then, when I was buying meat, she added one comment with a bright smile.
"Can I buy one more? Pweease?"
"We already bought a lot."
[Ramen Section]
Finally, when we moved to the ramen section to restock the noodles we finished yesterday, Miho's eyes went wide and she was startled.
"S-so many...! Mi, Miho, no matter what, I can't eat all of this!"
"Who said to take it all? Go pick out a few that you want to eat and bring them here."
"I got it!"
Whoosh, Miho ran off and came back staggering, carrying an armful of cup noodles big enough to cover her face.
"Ughh, ughhh..."
She was making weird sounds from her mouth, desperately trying to carry all the cup noodles she had grabbed.
Seeing that, she really was quite greedy too.
"Hey, you can just put them in one by one. One by one."
"Mi, Miho...! I can eat all of this!"
...Where do you live, you food demon?
"Kyaaang!"
Miho finally managed to dump all the cup noodles she was carrying into my basket. She must have brought so many that the basket became heavier than everything else combined.
"Really, for an elf, she only likes unhealthy things."
"Thank you veddy much."
Isn't this a skit I've seen somewhere?
"I'll ring you up."
"Yes."
「Beep, beep, beep, beep!」
On the way back from the mart after shopping, at the entrance, I saw a hot dog ajumma selling from a cart—rare to see these days.
Honestly, I wouldn't have noticed if I hadn't been interested, but today, Miho stopped in front of it, drooling, so I couldn't ignore it even if I wanted to.
"Two sausage hot dogs, please."
"Yes, one moment."
I received two hot dogs steaming with hot vapor, put one in my mouth, and handed the other to Miho.
"Let's go."
"Nom!"
How many steps had we taken like that?
"I'm done!"
The body of the hot dog was nowhere to be seen; only the wooden sticks with clear teeth marks remained pathetically in Miho's hands.
"What do I do with this?"
Miho asked, bothered by the wooden stick still in her hand.
"Just roughly..."
...I quietly shut my mouth.
When I was alone, I might have just thrown it in some corner without anyone noticing. I'd tossed cigarette butts like that a few times before.
Of course, I threw them properly in trash cans much more often.
"Give it here."
"Huh?"
"When you're done eating, you throw leftover trash in a nearby trash can, or if there isn't one, you take it home and throw it away."
"Why? Can't I just toss it anywhere?"
"Because then the Earth we're living on would scream in pain."
"Gasp! I got it, Miho, I'll take it home even if it costs me my life!"
"Yeah, yeah."
It's been over 12 hours since I quit smoking, so my mouth is itching like crazy, but in another sense, it keeps itching, and the corners of my mouth are reaching my ears.
A bastard like me saying such proper things and using those words to educate a child—it makes my chest itch too.
'Really, what an ill-fitting picture.'
But, that ill-fitting experience made me feel good for the first time in a long while.
Even the grocery shopping, which I always found tedious and annoying, wasn't so bad.
"Hey, I'm carrying this, so you carry mine too."
"Hmm... okay..."
What was that hesitation just now?
This clever little brat. So you didn't want to carry even that much, huh?
'She's got a nasty personality, that one.'
[A grown-up who makes a child do the work is even worse!]
"...I ignored the voice ringing in my ears and spoke to Miho.
"Let's go home and make dinner. It's late anyway, so let's just make simple tuna mayo rice bowls."
"Ohh, is that tasty?"
"It's f... extremely tasty. So good you wouldn't even know if one of us died while eating."
"Gasp! Then Hyunu, are you going to die?"
Why does it have to be me dying?
What about you?
"Kyaaaaang!"
This little brat, when she's at a disadvantage, she pretends to be cute and runs away.
Or is that my imagination?
"We're here!"
We really did arrive quickly.
Just walking side by side with Miho made the path, which I always found damn long even when listening to music, feel incredibly short.
And cooking didn't feel annoying at all.
Rather, I was a little curious about what kind of reaction Miho would have when she ate my cooking.
"Let's see, just take out the ingredients I'll use... Hey, put the cup noodles in a corner. Put all the leftover vegetables and meat in the fridge."
"Okay!"
Leaving the organizing to Miho, I roughly rolled up my sleeves and grabbed the kitchen knife. It wasn't really a big cooking project anyway.
Open one large can of tuna, and stir-fry it vigorously in a pan with finely chopped onions, carrots, and other vegetables.
No need to use a lot of cooking oil.
Because there's tuna oil.
「Sssshhhh, sssshhhh!」
After checking the ingredients that were quickly done, I dropped the rice in, stir-fried a bit more, and finally sprinkled mayonnaise on top. Done.
Cooking is hard only if you don't know how.
If you know the recipe and basic techniques, it's not that difficult.
Since there was no desk in the studio apartment, I put a wooden box on the floor and placed the pan with the tuna mayo on top.
"Come on, let's eat."
"Kyaaang!"
We sat facing each other and bowed.
"Thank you for the meal."
"Today as well, thank you for the blessings of nature."
Seeing her thank the blessings of nature, it seems like the voice in my head's elf is right.
'Really, it's all a mystery to me.'
I was staring blankly at Miho with the spoon in my mouth, but I had to snap out of it quickly.
"Hey, you fucking bitch, are you eating it all by yourself!"
"It's your fault for being late! Kyaang!"
Even though I used a large can of tuna for two bowls of rice, it took only 1 minute and 30 seconds for the food to disappear into Miho's mouth.
What is she, a vacuum cleaner?
"You'll get indigestion."
"Hyunu, even if you say that, the rice already in Miho's stomach isn't coming back."
I wanna fucking punch your head.
"Thank you for the meal. It was yummy!"
"Oh, really?"
"Yeah!"
Am I losing my mind too?
I only got to eat two spoonfuls for dinner, but seeing Miho smile so happily didn't make me feel very hungry.
Parents say that just watching their kids eat makes them full.
I thought that was just a plausible lie... but maybe not.
"If you're done eating, clean up."
"Ehh..."
Still, I felt from the first time we met that this girl definitely has a nasty personality. Look at her—she eats like crazy but can't be bothered to clean up.
Is this an elf?
"...Ugh, Hyunu, Miho's body is heavy..."
"It's heavy because you ate so much. Once you clean up, I'll teach you roughly how to use the phone, so remember that well. Judging by how you do things, I'm worried if you can even use it."
"What are you worried about?"
I'm worried because you tried to put the pan in the trash can instead of the sink, you little shit.
A little later, after finishing tidying up and forcing Miho, who was about to lie down on the floor, under my arm and brushing our teeth, I opened the phone case I bought today.
[Uju Phone 22 boasting top-tier specs]
[8GB RAM / 256GB UFS 3.1 internal storage]
[6.1-inch multi-touch capacitive touch screen hard to hold with two hands, ultrasonic fingerprint recognition]
[10-megapixel dual front camera]
[Rear camera + triple lens]
Simply put, it's the best phone on the market right now, and the most expensive.
[Aren't you giving a child something too expensive?]
"If I'm buying, might as well get the best, right? And money, I can earn again. Let's use it first and think later."
Miho also nodded.
"I got it! Only expensive stuff!"
[Truly a textbook example of a terrible parent.]
Whatever, I roughly taught Miho how to use the phone. Since the only functions she would use were Nutube and phone calls anyway.
Among those, the most important was naturally phone calls.
"You can use this to hear my voice anytime, even if I'm not at home or if I'm really far away. Do you understand what I'm saying?"
"..."
"I'll try calling you once. Press the green phone button like I taught you and answer it."
"Okay..."
I stepped outside the house for a moment and called Miho's number.
「Playing is the best~ Friends gather around!」
Startled by the ringtone from her phone, Miho carefully pressed the green button as I taught her and answered.
-Hello?
"Can you hear me?"
-...!
There was no immediate answer to my question.
"Huh? I said, can you hear me? Can't you hear me? Can't you hear my voice right now?"
That's when it happened.
Suddenly, I heard thumping sounds running from inside the room, and Miho, bursting through the front door I had left half-open, rushed to me and asked urgently.
"Hyunu! If, if I have this, can I hear the voices of people in the sky too?!"
"That's, well..."
For a moment, my words choked up completely.