Trauma (3)
Trauma (3)
"Really?"
"Yeah."
Ga-hee's hand starts trembling. Kkuuuk, she clenches her fist to stop the shaking, lets out a light breath, and asks Deokgu again.
"So...... starting this week, we can do performances. That's what you're saying?"
"It's too shabby to call it a performance. You know damn well how singers are treated in this Otherworld to begin with?"
"......Yeah, I know."
Ga-hee, who once sang in taverns to earn living expenses, knew exactly how singers were treated in the Otherworld.
Scavengers.
Or voice whores.
In the best light, beggar bastards who couldn't even sell their bodies properly and had to peddle their voices instead—pathetic losers.
That was the treatment singers got in this world.
But Ga-hee was confident she could change that perception.
"I even ordered a mic just because of you. Don't fuck it up. Practice hard."
"Don't worry. Who do you think I am?"
She was often misunderstood as the visual contact due to her trainee idol background and stunning looks, but she wasn't.
"I'm Muse's Diva."
She was the vocalist.
"What a hassle with this bodyguard shit......."
The sunlight beats down hot on the crown of my head. It's been ages since I last saw the sun hanging that high.
I spend way more time in the Dungeon than wandering outside, so I rarely get to see it smack in the middle of the sky like that.
"A hassle? Shopkeeper-nim! Is that something you say to your own idol?"
"What's with the honorifics......."
"This? Deokgu told me to. Anyway, Shopkeeper-nim, please take good care of me, yeah?"
She says that with an excited look on her face as she clears her throat. But I just sigh and glance around.
'To begin with...... there's no audience, so what bodyguard duty?'
The Otherworld isn't like modern Earth with crowds flowing everywhere. Hell, even on Earth, there's no psycho belting out songs in the middle of the city at lunchtime.
But Ga-hee grabs the mic without a hint of hesitation. Uung, the Magic Circle engraved inside the mic amplifies her voice widely.
As her voice spreads out, people's gazes focus in. But only for a moment.
People too busy with work have no spare time or energy for her.
"Shouldn't we head back?"
"Shut up! If I don't do it like this, people won't pay attention to me......."
"No, then at least do it on the weekend or something......."
"I'll do it on weekends too, yo!"
With her mix of honorifics and casual speech, she slowly grips the mic. Then she takes a deep breath.
[Everyone, listen to my song!]
If it were connected to an amp and speaker, that high note would clip and make a screeching noise, but the magic amplifies her voice perfectly.
It's ear-splittingly loud, but listeners don't feel it as noise. Her voice and vocalization are just that good.
Huu, Ga-hee, who seems tense as she lightly exhales, grabs the mic again.
[New idol, Ga-hee from Muse! Please take care of me!]
A stage standing alone, not a single audience member.
Her pounding heart doesn't stop.
She'd hoped, and been disappointed.
So now, all she can do is sing.
And turn everyone here into fans.
[──♬]
The moment she resolves that, a Diva descends upon this land.
The rumors spread.
"Did you hear? At lunchtime......."
"Yeah, it's still echoing in my head......."
Praise-only rumors, lauding a single singer.
"She showed up today too, they say?"
"Probably tomorrow too......."
Her voice was so huge it echoed across the entire city, so everyone living here had heard it.
And the moment you hear her voice even once, you can't escape it.
You're drawn in, searching for the owner of that voice.
Even noontime weekday performances with zero audience—her songs sung with pure sincerity came back to her like a boomerang.
"Muse! Muse!"
"When's she coming out!"
"Sing already!"
It's the weekend, sure, but an absurd number of people were waiting for her.
Ga-hee sneaks a peek at the crowd size, and a smile graces her face. Not as many as when she was an idol on Earth, but still.
All these people gathered just to see her.
Just to hear her sing.
It was deeply moving.
"I can do this, I got this."
"Nervous?"
"Huh?"
At Dojin's question, she flashes a light smile and steps forward.
People's gazes lock onto her.
An emotion like narcotics surges.
[Everyone! My song─!]
"We're from the Guard Force."
And all those emotions wash away clean as if doused with water.
"Sorry, sorry......."
"You didn't know, so we're letting you off just this once."
Ga-hee keeps bowing her head in front of the Guard Force member.
The Guard Force member clears his throat, kkhm, and hands over a paper.
"Um, and since I'm a fan...... could I get a signature or something?"
"Oh, really? Thank you!"
While Ga-hee quickly signs, I discuss the legal issues with the Guard Force member.
"So...... don't use Magic Tools to affect people, right?"
"Exactly. This time there was no harm to others, so we're releasing you, but...... if there'd been any victims, you couldn't have avoided arrest."
"Ah, yes. Got it."
I leave the Guard Force with Ga-hee. She trudges out with a gloomy expression.
The performance is halted. Guard Force intervention, charge is illegal use of a Magic Tool—letting its influence reach unpermitted city areas.
'Actually, this worked out great.'
In the Otherworld, paying for a singer's song was purely up to the listener's choice.
Even if it's a song so profound you never forget it, they might not drop a single coin.
That was the natural common sense, and until now, there'd been no justification to surpass it.
'Now we have grounds to build a performance hall.'
But not anymore. Using "preventing Magic Tool influence" as the pretext, we can build a performance hall.
With a hall, we can sell entry tickets to get in.
Make listening to songs something that costs money, not free. Change people's common sense.
"...Because of me."
"Hm?"
"Because of me, we got caught......."
Ga-hee, oblivious to that fact, is busy blaming herself just for getting nabbed by the Guard Force.
'She's never even been to a police station?'
I figured someone of her caliber would've been a regular, with that stereotype that celebrities are all School Bullies causing accidents left and right.
I lightly flick her forehead as she hangs her head with teary eyes. Ddak! The crisp sound rings out, and a single tear rolls down her cheek, jjuk.
"Ow! What the hell!?"
"What the hell are you doing?"
"......What do you mean. It's true. If I'd sung more quietly."
"Why's an idol worrying about that?"
An idol fretting if her voice is too loud? Ridiculously funny.
"What's our relationship?"
"Re, relationship? What's that......."
"You're the idol, I'm the shopkeeper. Right?"
"Ah, that relationship...... Yeah. Right."
"Idols just sing. I'll handle everything else as your shopkeeper."
Hearing that, Ga-hee clamps her mouth shut and stares at me. A look like she can't comprehend it.
"...Hey."
"Yeah?"
"Kinda late to ask, but...... why are you so good to me?"
"Hm?"
"I haven't done shit since coming here, just leeched off you guys and sucked up money like a parasite. Why treat me so well? Don't tell me you're after my body?"
It pours out like a machine gun. She hugs her chest and steps back a bit. Does she really think I'm after her body?
I look at her. Like she said, it's logically incomprehensible. Letting a freeloader who did nothing become an idol just because she wants to? Sucker doesn't even cover it.
However.
"It's a dream."
"......What?"
She dreams of being an idol. She devoted her life to it, only for that dream to shatter due to this absurd Otherworld transfer disaster.
"Do you know how important it is to do what you want?"
And yet she didn't give up. Even in a world with no concept of idols, even enduring mockery of selling body or voice.
She doesn't abandon her sparkling dream.
I couldn't do that.
So, I'm getting vicarious satisfaction watching her.
"Dream on, idol."
And shine. Brighter than anything.
"Budokan!!"
Hearing street performances were legally impossible now, Deokgu went apeshit yelling.
Dojin and Ga-hee, clueless about what a Budokan was, tilt their heads and stare at the rampaging Deokgu like he's a lunatic.
"To think I'd open a Budokan with my own hands......."
"What's a Budokan?"
"You don't know Budokan!?"
"Nope."
"...Fine, Dojin, you were a normie so whatever, but Ga-hee, you know, right?"
"What is it, you otaku?"
"An idol who doesn't know Budokan!!! "
Deokgu starts screeching like his throat's gonna rip out. Dojin plugs his ears before the explanation spam starts and heads out of the room.
Ga-hee cautiously follows.
"Crazy otaku bastard... Ah, my bad. Pretend you didn't hear that."
Image is everything for idols, so Ga-hee says that and parts ways with Dojin to head to her room.
Chilkeok, she locks the door, strips off her clothes, and dives into bed. Mulkyeong, the gross squishy bed catches her and absorbs the impact.
Lying in bed staring at the ceiling, Ga-hee recalls what Dojin just said.
[Dream on, idol.]
"Dream on? Ugh, so cringey......."
At the time, it made her toes curl in secondhand embarrassment. But replaying it alone in her room, it's the most reassuring thing ever.
'That crazy guy, he's not really into my body, is he?'
Dojin's face pops into her head. That grin as he said it, his solid build she only learned about late after coming to the Otherworld.
"Ugh......."
She grabs a pillow and covers her face. Her cheeks heat up for no reason. She kicks her legs wildly to cool off, pounding the blanket and bed, ppeong ppeong.
"You crazy bastard! Why keep being so nice!"
Kkulreong kkulreong, the bed shakes. She tries desperately to think negative thoughts. Then the image of Dojin and Seoyun entering the bathroom together surfaces.
His naked body comes to mind.
Hwaaak-.
"Uwaaaah! So annoying!"
Why's he gotta be unnecessarily hot, unnecessarily nice.
She thrashes and vents until exhausted, limbs going limp like chuuk.
Once the energy drains, the negative thoughts she'd tried forcing finally flood her brain.
"Dream? Me?"
Does she even deserve that?
Memories from Earth resurface.
Beautiful looks.
Stubborn pride to match.
But mediocre talent.
In the idol industry, her innate skill was too low to survive.
Prettier idols than her? Plenty.
Better singers among trainees? Plenty.
Better dancers among peers? Plenty.
In the end, she became an ambiguous existence.
Ambiguously pretty.
Ambiguously cute.
Ambiguously dances.
Ambiguously sings.
Even deciding to be an idol in the Otherworld was because she thought here, at least, she'd have unmatched skill.
Not the result of a dream.
The result of compromising with reality.
"Do I even deserve that?"