Chapter 20
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 20
Chapter Title: The Clueless Roommate
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Is there a demon haunting this place or something? Only broke people keep showing up.
...But then it hit me—people end up here precisely because we're broke. A one-room apartment with 600,000-won rent. Sure, it's pricey, but when you factor in the building's condition, the square footage, and all that, it's not a bad deal at all.
Like that time I'd raced off to Cheongdam-dong with Oh Hana, or how it's smack in the middle of all these upscale, trendy spots.
'Still better than Oh Hana, though.'
Oh Hana had shown up literally penniless and bulldozed her way into living together without a second thought. Back then, her charm won me over, so I let it slide, but honestly, Han Abeom's approach was the right one. You should at least bring a month's rent upfront before expecting to crash somewhere.
"Ah, go right ahead."
Truth be told, just having Han Abeom move in nets me 300,000 won from the quest reward.
Plus, I'd recently gotten a fat 2-million-won deposit, and starting today, the odds of not having to pay Oh Hana for sex had shot way up. Things were pretty cushy for me financially.
'Huh? Hold on.'
For a split second, I nearly screamed.
Did someone just stab me in the gut? No. Did someone whack me upside the head? No. But it hit me with that kind of shock anyway.
'Sex! Right, sex, damn it...!'
It was such a massive screw-up that it felt like my brain split in two, with one half cussing me out royally. Hell, this was bigger than landing a job at a major corporation right this instant.
What the hell am I supposed to do about sex with Oh Hana?
'Crazy, crazy! Craaaazy...!'
I'd finally scored creampie privileges and an all-access pass to Oh Hana today—or so I thought. Now that pass was rotting in my pocket.
'Wanna join in, Abeom? Heh?'
No way in hell was that scenario happening. Human decency aside, Oh Hana might jokingly threaten to call the cops as a warning, but this girl in front of me? She'd dial them in 0.1 seconds flat and spill every detail.
'Maybe I can just do it when she heads out for work or a part-time gig.'
Even so, living under the same roof every day? No way that stays hidden.
"Hyunwoo, you okay?"
"Huh? Oh... yeah."
I mumbled in a daze, but her utterly pure gaze drilled right into me. A tidal wave of guilt slapped me across the face. God, was I really this sex-obsessed? It made my own skin crawl.
But what could I do?
At 29, I'd finally ditched virginity, with a stunner like Oh Hana no less... and damn if the sex wasn't mind-blowingly good—maybe we just clicked that way. Now that we'd leveled up to the next stage, anyone would freak if it all slammed to a halt.
'Should I... kick her out right now?'
My eyes landed on the envelope sitting on the computer desk.
If I told her now that it wouldn't work out and sent her packing...
"Hyunwoo?"
"Oh... uh, do you know how to use the computer?"
"...Sorry, I can kinda look around, but actually operating it? I'm still miles away. I'm studying up on it, though."
...No dice.
Something told me if I booted Han Abeom out like this, she'd end up scammed by some lowlife worse than me, unable to snag a decent place—or wandering the streets all day.
That thought alone killed any guts I had to send her away. Not unless she bailed because she couldn't hack it...
"Heh heh heh..."
"...?"
"Nah, nothing. Heh heh heh."
All I could muster was this awkward chuckle. You never know what life throws at you, but I really didn't see this coming.
"Anyway, let's start by ordering a bedding and pillow set."
"Oh, sure. Um, could I do it?"
"Of course. It's logged into my account anyway, so just hop on the site and pick out what you like. Sales items with the most reviews are usually solid bets."
"Promotions are stacked right now, and since these come straight from mass production at big factories, they're cheaper for the quality."
Huh?
I blinked in surprise. Not wrong, exactly... but do normal people phrase it like that?
"Did you work at a company or something?"
"...A company? I guess you could say I did a little."
What the hell does that even mean?
Couldn't make heads or tails of it. Was she really that sheltered? Like, raised with zero exposure to the real world, treated like royalty her whole life?
Is that even possible these days?
"Oh, the mouse... like this?"
"Yeah."
"But it's not moving much? Ungh! No more room to move the mouse."
...What is this adorable creature?
It took me back to when I was a kid—like when my little sister, around seven, first touched a computer because she was dying to play Junior Saber Flash.
She sounded like a pro earlier, but now she just looks like a clumsy kid sister.
"Oh, I keep the sensitivity pretty low. But like this, it's easier to maneuver."
I demonstrated with smooth swipes.
Han Abeom's eyes went wide with pure awe. That gaze screamed untouched innocence.
She really has no clue about computers.
"Eh, I barely use the thing these days anyway. I'll crank up the sensitivity so you can use it comfortably."
Click, click.
I pressed the button on the mouse's underside to bump it up, and finally, she could handle it smoothly.
"Huh, where's the internet?"
Here we go again?
This isn't some government-funded senior computer class...
"You've never used the internet?"
I asked just to be sure.
She shook her head.
"No, I have. It's just not here."
"Hm... probably used an old browser. Most folks use Chrome these days."
"Chrome?"
"Yeah, that red-and-blue swirly icon. Double-click it."
"Oh, okay."
Click, cliiiick... but instead of opening, the icon just scooted sideways.
"It's not turning on?"
This is trickier than I thought. Really tricky. Never mind—most people around me are computer whizzes, so maybe that's why.
Even my dad wasn't this bad.
"That wasn't a double-click; the mouse drifted, so it registered as a move command. Try double-clicking without budging the mouse."
Feels like elementary school computer class. For real.
At least...
"Ah, like this?"
Separate from her innocence, Han Abeom was a stellar student—quick to learn, apply, and retain. Above all, she listened intently and absorbed advice perfectly.
"Right. Now... type 'Coupang' into that search bar."
"Okay..."
Her seriousness was so intense it almost made me laugh.
Tap, tap.
...Why was her hunt-and-peck typing so damn cute? Sigh, showing up in chic fashion only to drop this airhead bombshell—total foul play.
"And... hit enter?"
"Yep."
"Ah! It worked! It popped up!"
I nearly patted her head and cooed, Good girl. Her excited squeal was straight out of kindergarten, like a kid nailing their first apple read-aloud.
'Parents did a number on her upbringing—good or bad, hard to say.'
She seemed decent enough on the surface. Bringing all her worldly possessions felt more like emergency cash than desperation, and she led with basic courtesy—like offering rent upfront.
Elegant demeanor, but never condescending or rude. Respect for others was baked in.
Just... clueless about the world.
Stuff any kid picks up after three years of elementary school and playground antics? Total blank.
'Maybe search later if there's some fantasy-level ladies' academy in Korea.'
I mused to myself as...
Han Abeom carefully typed 'bedding & pillow set' into Coupang's search bar without a hitch.
[Coupang Boost Ad Product]
[Top Popularity]
A cascade of related items scrolled up.
[Coupang Pick: Duvet Set / 69,700 won]
[4.8 Stars]
[119,291 Reviews]
The top one naturally caught the eye. Stellar rating, insane review count. Even with fakes, this many buyers means it's legit.
"Promotions really rule the day now. Sure, ad fees are skyrocketing, but the returns beat that. Over 100k reviews, cheap price—looks good. Psychologically, folks rarely scroll past the top or second row."
"Yeah... pretty much."
I usually skipped digging deeper out of laziness, grabbing top-rated ad-marked stuff anyway.
"But the beauty of online is browsing freely. Among the scrappers surviving this market, some nail descriptions or price quality right. Those rise eventually. Takes time and grit, though."
...What?
Felt like I was job-shadowing an analysis team lead somewhere.
"You're sharp, Abeom."
"Pardon?"
Huh? Did I say something weird?
"You don't have to force compliments. Any three-year-old knows this stuff."
World would flip if three-year-olds did. Prodigy alert.
Her common sense was definitely off my grid.
"Hm, this one's perfect! Free shipping, safe delivery for good condition, way cheaper, top-notch quality—ideal for me."
Just to check, I peeked at the reviews. Only 100, but packed with sincere feedback. Not just reviews—detailed seller specs, quality certs. Made me wanna buy one myself. Proper product.
And cheaper than Coupang's flagship promo.
"I'm broke, so using your money embarrasses and shames me, but... please."
"No, no."
Getting such profuse thanks for a measly 50,000 won? Wild experience.
[Order completed.]
Man, I'm wiped.
Exhausted to death. She's cute and polite, sure, but her stiff formality chokes the air a bit.
Wonder if it'll loosen up when Oh Hana gets back... or make things worse.
That's when it happened.
5844.
The sound of the door lock password being entered.