Chapter 21
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 21
After a relentless back-and-forth with Eun-seong where he hadn’t backed down an inch, Han-byeol’s practice finally began.
His turn only came after the main actors had finished filming, so he had to wait by himself for quite a while. Yet, the boy didn’t complain or show any signs of boredom.
Yeon-ju, who had been busy all day, heard it was Han-byeol’s turn and headed for the set. Even though Han-byeol was the one standing in front of the camera, her own fingertips had been trembling with nerves since the morning.
“Yeon-ju!”
As she hurried along, Dr. Ju appeared from the opposite direction.
“Where are you headed?”
“Hello, Doctor. I heard Han-byeol is having his camera test. I’m on my way to watch.”
“Ah, is that so?”
Calling it perfect timing, Dr. Ju fell into step beside her, and they walked to the set together. He matched his pace to hers, which was slightly faster than usual, and smiled.
“You must be worried.”
“My mind is a mess. I’m not the one doing it, so I don’t know why I’m this nervous.”
“He’ll do great. Han-byeol takes after his mother—he’s a wonderful kid.”
As Dr. Ju spoke, seemingly trying to soothe her anxious heart, Yeon-ju let out a short, quiet breath.
Looking at the doctor keeping pace with her, she offered a gentle smile.
“I’m glad you’re here with me, Doctor. If I had gone alone, my legs might have given out from shaking so much.”
“Then I’ll have to show up more often in the future. So you don’t stumble, Yeon-ju.”
Yeon-ju, who had been walking without thinking, suddenly froze in her tracks.
Then I’ll have to show up more often in the future.
…She had tried not to expect anything from the kindness and consideration of others, whose true intentions she could never know.
So you don’t stumble, Yeon-ju.
It occurred to her then that this man, who had suddenly appeared in her life one day, was like an umbrella on a rainy day.
“It’s this way, Yeon-ju.”
“Ah, yes, Doctor.”
An umbrella.
Someone who couldn’t stop misfortune from coming, but could at least provide temporary shelter from the downpour.
He was a truly warm person. Yes, the doctor is just naturally kind to everyone.
Yeon-ju smiled warmly at Dr. Ju as he gestured her forward, and she followed. She felt her restless, wandering heart finally settle back into place.
* * *
The atmosphere on set was anything but bright. The overworked staff moved around Han-byeol with a cold, businesslike efficiency.
Standing all alone in front of the camera, Han-byeol looked around, his large eyes darting from side to side. Everyone seemed so busy with their own tasks that there was no one he could even ask how long he was supposed to wait.
His lips were pressed into a tight line and his small fists were clenched; it was clear he was intimidated and nervous. With no other children in sight and only expressionless, indifferent adults bustling past him, it was only natural for him to feel scared.
Standing there like a lost child on a crowded street, Han-byeol looked up as a shadow fell over him.
“Hey, One Star. You looked like you were ready to conquer the world in the waiting room. Scared now?”
It was the “Filial Piety is Money” mister.
He hadn’t realized it when they were sitting, but standing up, the man was incredibly tall. Han-byeol had to tilt his head back so far his neck strained just to meet his gaze.
“No, I’m not. I’m not scared at all.”
“Sure, sure. You look like you’re about to cry, but I’ll pretend I didn’t see it.”
When Eun-seong comically pressed his lips together to mimic the boy’s expression, Han-byeol glared at him. The child’s dispirited mood vanished in an instant.
“I’m not scared at all!”
“Who said you were? If you’re not, you’re not. Why are you getting so mad?”
“Because you just said I was! I’m not scared one bit!”
“Whoa, but your hands are shaking like crazy. You sure you’re okay?”
Eun-seong glanced down, telling him to look at his hands. Han-byeol quietly unclenched his fists. He had been so tense he hadn’t even realized he was clenching them. His earlobes flushed red.
Not wanting to lose to this “Filial Piety is Money” mister, he squared his shoulders, straightened his back, and put on a confident face.
“See? I’m not scared at all.”
At that, Eun-seong let out a faint smirk.
“Yeah. Don’t be scared. It’s no big deal.”
As if to say he was doing a good job, Eun-seong ruffled Han-byeol’s hair—his own version of a pat on the head.
“You know who I am, right? I’m your dad.”
“……”
He knew, but for some reason, the words wouldn’t come out. Han-byeol remained quiet. His heart suddenly began to pound at the word ‘dad,’ and he didn’t want to be caught feeling that way either.
Eun-seong knelt on one knee, bringing himself down to the boy’s height. Only then did their eyes meet properly. Han-byeol looked directly into the face of the man who had lowered himself to his level.
For a brief moment, an indefinable energy passed between them.
It felt like looking into a mirror—or perhaps catching a glimpse of a place somewhere in the past, present, and future.
“Until this shoot is over, I’m going to think of you as my son. While we’re acting, when we’re resting at home, and even in moments like this.”
“Why do you have to do that?”
“Because to act, you have to truly become that person. That’s why it’s hard and challenging, but it’s also fun. It gives you a chance to live someone else’s life while you’re filming.”
The words hovered just on the edge of understanding.
Han-byeol’s grumpy expression vanished, replaced by a look of seriousness. Although he didn’t like the “Filial Piety is Money” mister at all, he already knew the man was a great actor.
So, when he was being taught something, he had to learn. Except for lessons on how to practice filial piety with money, of course.
“Now, what do you think you should do? Answer me.”
“……”
Han-byeol hesitated again. He felt so shy and awkward that the word ‘dad’ was stuck in his throat, refusing to come out.
Perhaps it was because it was a word he had rarely ever uttered.
“Still don’t get it? Should I wait?”
“No, that’s not it.”
“Then who am I?”
“……Dad.”
Eun-seong chuckled as he looked at Han-byeol, who had spoken so softly it was barely audible. At the sound, Han-byeol, who had been staring at the floor, raised his head to meet his eyes again.
Eun-seong placed a hand on Han-byeol’s shoulder, then gently stroked his cheek, and finally patted his head.
His touch carried a completely different warmth from when he had ruffled his hair earlier.
“Yeah. For now, I’m your dad.”
“Yes……”
“I’m in your hands, son.”
Before Han-byeol could reply, Eun-seong stood up and surprised everyone on set by announcing that he would personally assist with the child’s camera test.
Having already arrived, Yeon-ju watched the entire scene unfold from a distance.
* * *
How could I regret it?
By the time she and Dr. Ju arrived, Eun-seong was already standing in front of Han-byeol.
The moment she saw the two of them together, an unexpected sight, Yeon-ju froze. Dr. Ju, unaware of the situation’s significance, stopped beside her.
“Looks like it’s still a bit chaotic. I guess they haven’t started yet, right?”
“……”
It was as if a wave of white noise washed over her, blocking out all sound. Dr. Ju’s voice, though right beside her, faded to a faint whisper, and the chaotic atmosphere of the set vanished completely.
All she could see was her child and him.
Eun-seong seemed to exchange a few words with the boy, and when he slowly knelt, Yeon-ju’s breath caught in her throat.
She couldn’t tell if this was reality or an illusion—
“Looking at them like this, Han-byeol actually resembles Im Eun-seong a little. I guess handsome people just have a way of looking alike.”
When he stroked the child’s shoulder, his face, his head, it felt as if the ground beneath her feet was splitting open to swallow her whole.
After staring for a long time at Eun-seong looking into her child’s eyes, Yeon-ju squeezed her own shut.
…No. Open your eyes.
You don’t know when you’ll ever see this moment, this sight, again.
So open your eyes. Look. Fill them with this image while you still can, without missing a single second.
Swallowing the burning lump in her throat, Yeon-ju forced her eyelids open. The sight of him and the child looking at each other was instantly, painfully seared into her vision.
…He was smiling.
As the image of him sharing a smile with their child flickered in her eyes, the world around them began to transform.
The place where the father and son stood became a vast field, swept by the gentle breeze the child loved so much—
Or perhaps a damp, silvery beach where seashells glistened before the crashing waves.
“Yeon-ju. Looks like they’re about to start. I’m getting nervous myself.”
Were the father and son playing under the warm, shimmering sunlight? Or were they patting down soil together to build a little dirt house?
Or perhaps he was about to lift the boy onto his shoulders, walking as one along a path painted by the setting sun.
Am I dreaming?
Can’t I step into that warm, cozy picture? Can’t I fit myself in somewhere, as if the three of us had been together from the very beginning?
…Her chest swelled with emotion, but there was nothing she could do.
“Yeon-ju, are you alright?”
How would it sound if I said these words to you?
I wanted us to hold our toddler’s hands, one on each side, as he took his first steps. I wanted to watch with you as he ran ahead of us.
Sometimes I wanted to lean on you, sometimes I wanted to rely on you. Raising him was so hard and overwhelming, yet watching him grow was so beautiful and precious that, at times, I missed you.
I wanted to say, “Look. Look how beautiful our child is. Look how much he’s grown.”
“Yeon-ju?”
Yes. Perhaps the reason she had stepped onto this perilous set with her child was because she thought it would be her last chance.
Using her child’s dream as an excuse, driven by a stubborn defiance against a fate she refused to accept, she might have come all this way.
Just to see it once. To see you and my child—no, our child—standing together.
Because she wanted to engrave that sight into her memory, if only for a single moment.
“……”
Spotting Yeon-ju, Eun-seong let Han-byeol know his mom had arrived, and the child turned. As he waved with a bright, lovely smile, Yeon-ju forced herself to smile back.
Perhaps finding it awkward to just stand there, Eun-seong also raised a hand slightly in greeting. Yeon-ju’s lips parted as she watched the child and the man standing side by side, waving at her.
A sharp ringing echoed in her ears, and she bit her lip hard.
What am I supposed to do with this sight? What am I supposed to do with this memory?
I feel as though I can never go back to the life I had before this.
…Summoning her courage, she waved back.
Forgetting time and space, erasing seasons and age, she fell into the illusion that in this very moment, she had stepped into the same world as them.
After waving awkwardly, she slowly lowered her hand. She wanted to linger in this moment, in this feeling, just a little longer, yet at the same time, she wanted to rush back to reality.
The moment her hand dropped, reality came flooding back. She could feel the movements of the people around her, and the noise that had faded to a dull ringing sharpened into distinct sounds.
Only then did she slowly close her eyes.
Standing perfectly still, she took a long, deep breath, as if storing everything she had just witnessed deep inside her heart.
…Do you have any idea what you’ve just done?
Do you expect your life to remain safe after committing such an act?
If an angry God were to appear and condemn her, she would gladly accept the harsh rebuke.
Even if He punished her, declaring she could never be forgiven or understood, she would willingly accept it.
Without hesitation, she would walk into the fires of hell. She would gladly bear a punishment that lasted for an eternity.
This was enough.
For her, this was more than enough.