Chapter 24: The Happy Dog
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 24: The Happy Dog
The Undying are, by their very nature, a great threat. Being unable to die, they are so fundamentally different from ordinary people that they cannot integrate into society. They do not fear guns, they do not flee from fire, and they are desensitized to violence. They are the kind to laugh off a severed finger and simply reattach it. While they don't mind being stabbed themselves, they cannot comprehend why others fear blades. Chaos has always followed in the wake of their attempts to settle in towns and cities, which is why the military authorities ultimately forbade the Undying from residing within the Military State.
The golem spoke as it looked down at the twitching right arm.
Furthermore, this being, who carries the purest blood of the Undying, does not perish even in the Abyss, a place completely isolated from all external forces. This is beyond our expectations. They are an exceedingly resilient and dangerous race. I believe this will be too much for you to handle.
"So you're saying if I kill him now, it'll save me trouble later?"
From your perspective as well, would it not be troublesome to have yet another trainee?
He had a point. I was nearly folded in half by the Regressor and almost torn to shreds by the vampire. And while Azzy doesn't attack me, she is calmly chipping away at the lifespan of my shoulders.
And now one more? The burden would certainly grow heavier.
Tempted by the golem's proposal, I asked casually.
"How would I eliminate him?"
The method is currently classified, so I cannot disclose it. However, I can promise you that he can be permanently banished from Tantalus. He will never be able to return here.
"And who's going to do it?"
You would have to, of course.
Ah, so. I. I would have to take that body and "eliminate" it myself.
Is that all?
I gave a crisp reply.
"I won't do it."
Will you not regret it?
"Regret it or not, eliminating a perfectly living person? What a cruel idea. I can't do that."
It was only natural. Do you know why people shouldn't commit murder? It's to avoid retaliation.
Whether that retaliation comes from the law, the victim's family, or even a severed right arm. What if I get my payback? Are you going to take responsibility for it?
You said he was one of the Undying. That he doesn't die. His limbs are already moving even after being cut off. What if, in the process of "eliminating" him, he somehow revives and comes back for revenge? No, he wouldn't even need to revive. If just one of his severed limbs came seeking vengeance, I'm not confident I could win.
A self-moving right arm is scarier to me than a strong man.
"Let's just feed him and bring him around. No more of this weird talk about elimination and banishment."
That is unexpected. I was not aware you were such a moral person.
"What do you take me for?"
I am more moral than anyone in the world. Because I fear retaliation more than anyone in the world.
A person who knows fear is cautious, and being cautious of others is the very definition of observing etiquette and morality.
This was how I survived in the back alleys, and it was the principle that had kept me alive.
"The supplies are coming, right? I've got one more mouth to feed now, so it'll be a problem if they don't arrive."
There are supplies on standby. They were halted at the terminal due to the prison break, but transport will resume once we notify them that Tantalus has been stabilized.
"Excellent! Let's get them moving right away! When will they arrive?"
They will arrive within three hours.
"That's fast!"
Do you have a complaint?
"Of course not! I mean it's great! But is that even possible?"
The administrative power of the Military State is the best in the world. Resending supplies that were already in transit is not even an issue.
I couldn't read the golem's thoughts, but I had a feeling that its operator was puffing out their chest with pride. It's not like they accomplished anything themselves, but I decided to keep my mouth shut. If they cut off my supplies, I'd be the only one to suffer.
"How many supplies are we talking about?"
According to the Tantalus supply plan, three days' worth of food was scheduled for delivery.
"Are you crazy? That's barely enough to..."
However, this plan was established before the prison break. Given the drastic reduction in personnel, the current quantity should last for about ninety days.
"Then that's more than enough for me! Wow! The Military State's administrative power is truly amazing!"
In that case, there was no need to ration food anymore. With ninety days' worth of food, I could make fermented soybean blocks out of canned beans and still have leftovers.
Ah, right, this is the Abyss, so maybe fermenting is out. In any case, as long as the quantity was sufficient, the number of dishes I could make was practically infinite.
Great. It's been a while since I've felt such material abundance. I shouted excitedly.
"Azzy! That's dirty! Don't touch it!"
"Woof?"
Azzy, who had been staring at the bone attached to the right arm with a strange look, snapped her head up. When I made a circle with my fingers and wiggled them, she immediately ran over and rested her chin on my hand. I tickled her chin and said.
"Let's eat something delicious, not that cheap meat. The supplies will be here soon, so I'll make you that tasty meal I promised!"
"Woof!"
Azzy barked happily. I continued to scratch her chin and head, lost in thought.
What should I make? I was tired of stew. Maybe I could blanch the meat, then pan-fry it so it's like a cracker? Or I could mince the meat, mix it with starch and boiled beans, and grill it. It might be nutritionally inefficient, but grinding the beans and straining them to make soy milk could be nice too.
Just as I was imagining all the culinary luxuries I could indulge in, something bumped against my heel. I turned to see what it was and jumped in shock. It was the right arm.
It had crawled all the way to me using only its fingers.
"Looks like we have another mouth to feed."
I took a can from the cupboard, opened it, and upended it, placing the entire block of food into the right arm's palm. It was compressed beans, hard as a brick, but the arm paid it no mind and headed for its main body. After diligently crawling all the way back, the right arm, like a mother bird feeding its chick, tipped the beans into the body's open mouth.
"That's one... capable right arm."
Is having a limb that works hard even when the main body is in a coma what makes one an Undying, or is it the other way around?
In any case, not dismembering him further was definitely the right choice. If that right arm teamed up with the left arm and both legs to come after me for revenge, I'm not confident I could win. Though it was incredibly annoying to see a body that was practically a corpse devour an entire can of food.
It was a bit grotesque, but for the time being, I'd have to keep the golem and the h-u-m-a-n in the cafeteria.
"Woof! Woof!"
"Can't even wait a minute, can you? Alright, alright. I'm on it."
I took out the beans and meat from a compressed can. The performance of the State's special compressed cans was as impressive as ever, boasting a rock-like hardness with not a drop of moisture. Even the jerky from my past, once compared to bricks, couldn't hold a candle to this. It would take an eternity to eat this without water.
I trimmed the fatty parts from the compressed meat and placed them on a pan. As I lit the fire, the fat began to melt and render.
I soaked the rest of the meat and the beans in water. I wasn't making stew this time, so I used just enough water to submerge them about halfway.
While the bone-dry beans and meat soaked up the water, I took out the dough I had made the other day. Peeking inside, I saw that the white, round ball of dough, about the size of an ostrich egg, looked exactly as it had when I first made it.
"Hmm. Just as I thought. No fermentation."
Far from rising, it hadn't even changed color, as if it had been taxidermied. This is a land cursed by Mother Earth; things cannot rot and return to the soil.
"Still, this is the bottom of the Abyss, right? If the place I'm standing is earth, there should be some workers of the earth around..."
Something was nagging at me, but I couldn't figure out what. Ugh, this is frustrating. It's not like I can read Mother Earth's mind.
I scratched my head in irritation, but it's not like I could just pull knowledge out of thin air. My head wasn't a rice jar.
"Ah, whatever. People with great power can deal with great matters."
It was better not to expect soft bread here. I'd just have to hope there was rice in the supplies.
I put the hard dough in the oven and turned up the heat. At the same time, I brought the slightly stiff, rehydrated beans and meat and placed them in front of Azzy.
"Food!"
"Not yet. Wait. We have to make it even tastier."
I wiped Azzy's paws clean with a towel. She squirmed as the clean cloth touched her paws, as if it tickled, but she managed not to run away. I gave her head a pat as praise and then gave her a command.
"Azzy. Punch it."
"No! It'll hurt the meat!"
"Meat always gets tastier the more you torment it."
"Woof?"
"It was much more delicious when we grilled it last time, wasn't it? The more it hurts, the more flavor it releases."
That's why they say you have to beat a dog to make it tastier. Ugh.
I swallowed the last part and persuaded Azzy.
"Woof! You're right!"
Convinced, Azzy immediately threw a punch. It was so fast I couldn't even see her fist. A dull thud, and an indent appeared in the minced meat.
The meat and beans, still a bit stiff from lack of moisture, were instantly pulverized by Azzy's doggy punch. A true human—no, a dog pulverizer.
She said it would hurt the meat. But in the face of flavor, she shows not a shred of mercy.
While Azzy pounded away, I slowly added starch and kneaded it in. With beans instead of eggs, it lacked stickiness. It would probably fall apart on the pan.
However, unlike in human society, the world of cooking values what's on the inside more than appearances. As long as it tastes good, it doesn't matter how ugly it looks.
"Alright, alright. Plenty of oil. Here we go~."
The round patty of bean-meat—that is, a hamburg steak made of beans and meat—dropped onto the pan. Immediately, a sizzling sound erupted as the patty began to cook. The smell of searing protein. The sound of meat lightly frying in oil. It sounded like the summer monsoon rain drumming on wet earth.
"W-woof."
Azzy, seemingly mesmerized by the overwhelming aroma, forgot to even bark and just stared up at the pan. Not even a religious zealot meeting an angel could have such a look in their eyes. I chuckled and hummed a little tune.
"La la la~"
Fire and heat steal all color. As if stubbornly insisting that vibrant hues should only exist as light, they dye the insolent crimson of blood into a carbonized brown.
What is gained in exchange for lost color is umami and flavor. For humans, it is a welcome change. Though the meat on the fire probably didn't want to become delicious.
I used a spatula to fix the slightly misshapen patty and placed it on a plate. I drizzled a little of the glistening meat fat over the top. There, one plate. Normally, people eat before dogs, but just for today, Azzy goes first.
"Woooof."
I set the hamburg steak down in front of Azzy. She couldn't bring herself to eat the masterpiece and just looked up at me. While she waited, I served my own portion, placed it on the table, and sat down.
As I set down my own utensils, I spoke to the golem on the table.
"Captain Abbey. Care to come down and have a bite?"
Pay me no mind. A watcher is not swayed by desire.
"Understood! Then please, enjoy it with your eyes!"
...
I left the golem on the table and picked up my spoon. Azzy's body was tense. Like a sprinter at the starting line, she was ready to bolt at the signal.
Can't forget this part. It's a learning opportunity.
I took out the chime bell. Azzy's eyes filled with anticipation. She knew what I was about to do. What would happen next. Her body remembered.
Jingle. I shook the bell. In that instant, Azzy's salivary glands burst. Her mouth hung wide open, drool dripping down. Her eyes were sparkling so much they looked like they might fall right into the meat.
And yet she still waited for me. She really is a good girl. Hmm. I shouldn't doubt her when it comes to food from now on.
I set the chime bell down and declared.
"Let's eat!"
"Woooof—!"
Azzy plunged her face straight into the plate.
In that moment, Azzy was the happiest dog in the world.