A Guest from the Bureau
A Guest from the Bureau
" Hmmm.... "
When I woke up, there was still a little time left before I had to go to work.
Even if I rushed to work, Manager-nim would still be asleep, and business at the store would still be dead.
Besides, today is Monday.
A Monday just like yesterday and tomorrow—that is to say, a weekday.
At 4 AM when the store opens, good children should be off in dreamland.
Even if they wake up, it's time to get ready for school.
There's no way anyone would visit a candy store at this hour.
" But an outstanding clerk ought to come out early and start working! "
Mmm-hmm-hmm.
I love Mondays.
I hum along to the rhythm as I tidy up the store.
Of course, as always, my humming gets drowned out by the classical music filling the store, so I'm really just getting into the mood.
I've wondered about this for a while, but will there ever be a day when these speakers get turned off?
'Probably not.'
In the manual I received when becoming a clerk, there was a clause explicitly stating not to turn off the store's speakers.
And then there was the candy freshly pulled from the piñata.
Just for fun, I placed it on sleeping Manager-nim's shoulder.
Day after day after day, ten days, day after day, seven days, a day passed, and until it rotted away on its own, it only moved slightly with his breathing without ever falling off.
Which means he didn't wake up even once.
He really is an amazing person.
Most humans wake up in the middle of a midsummer night if a single mosquito buzzes around.
Yet with so many flies buzzing around lured by the sweetness of the candy, he didn't wake up even once.
:: This, too, is only possible because it's a fairytale-like world. ::
" Hahaha, right? He really is a unique person. "
His outfit even looks just like the King in a deck of playing cards.
Seeing as it's red, it must be Hearts or Diamonds.
He looks like he's about to step into a coffin any moment, and I've never even had a proper conversation with him.
But aren't there people who just make life interesting simply by being watched?
Our Boss is one of those people. I'm truly lucky.
" Mmm. Come to think of it, was today Monday? "
:: To be precise, it's the seventy-third Monday. ::
" Aha. "
:: Did you think what I just said was strange at all? ::
I pondered for a moment, but I didn't particularly think so.
Because today really is the seventy-third Monday.
Hmm. Looks like she asked another trick question like before.
Judging by her expression as if suppressing a laugh, that must be it.
Seriously, she is terrible at lying.
:: Geez. I really can't fool you. So why are you asking about the day of the week? ::
" To check the delivery date. "
Do you know this?
Piñatas have an expiration date and tend to spoil easily.
Because of that, we have to receive deliveries periodically.
The candies and snacks inside the piñatas are the same.
:: It's hard to imagine candies or snacks spoiling, though. ::
:: But they're food, too, aren't they? Raw materials, even. ::
:: So it makes sense that they'd spoil. ::
" True. As expected, Bell is wise. "
As always, she teaches me common sense about this world.
Honestly, I don't know what I would have done without her.
:: Yesterday, didn't you say you would've managed to live somehow even without me? ::
" ...Having an unnecessarily good memory, are we? "
Exchanging such silly banter, I headed to the cold storage.
Sure enough, the piñatas had been delivered.
They were frozen solid.
" It's really bizarre. The entrance is clearly inside the store, but I've never seen a delivery person. How do they stock this up and leave? "
:: Maybe the delivery comes at dawn while you're asleep? ::
:: Or maybe it's like that astronaut who disappeared yesterday? ::
:: Teleportation! Magic!! A UFO delivery that surpasses next-day rocket delivery! ::
" Oh. Makes sense, makes sense. "
Like that, twirling my double-edged saw, I agreed with Bell's speculation.
It was an utterly peaceful atmosphere.
Because of that, I couldn't even fathom that right after this, something terrifying beyond imagination would happen.
"Kyaaaaaaaaaah!!!!!!"
A high-pitched scream echoed right before my eyes.
The moment I reached out to grab it, a suit-wearing hamster piñata let out a scream.
" ...!? "
This had never happened before.
I almost screamed along in shock, but—.
My previous workplace... wait, was it a part-time job?
Now even my memory is hazy, so it feels like ancient history.
Anyway. It wasn't as rewarding as my current job, but I certainly developed composure there.
Thanks to that, I maintained a calm attitude and was able to coolly analyze what was happening in this situation.
'That's not a piñata?!'
I mistook it because it was frozen stiff with its eyes closed... but this is a plush!
In other words, one of the residents of this fairytale-like world!
What a crazy supplier!
" Oh dear. Are you alright? "
"...!"
" Slowly. Take a breath, breathe. "
Inhale deeply, exhale.
Inhale, exhale.
As I took deep breaths to show how it's done, the plush in front of me quickly mimicked me.
As if that trick was familiar to it.
'That really startled me.'
Inside the cold storage, it's warm enough.
Even so, I felt a chill run down my spine.
Mmm. Still, I managed to avoid an accident like the astronaut yesterday.
That was truly a heartbreaking incident.
To scream at a person's face as if seeing some monster.
My heart hurt so much that I ended up....
"T-Thank you...."
" ...! "
Pupils still trembling.
Tinkerbell, who was watching the scene with interest, landed on my shoulder.
" You're trembling. Well, since we're inside the cold storage, it makes sense to catch a chill in such an overly hot environment. "
"Y-Yes. Excuse me, but could you please let me out?"
Mmm. "Excuse me, but"?
That bothers me strangely.
:: You used to be told you looked scary back in your original world, too. ::
:: Even if it's just a children's toy kitchen knife. ::
:: A burly guy holding something like that inside a cold storage unit? Can't you picture the scene? ::
I looked down.
In my hand was the ebony-gleaming double-edged saw that Tinkerbell claimed was toy tableware.
...Mmm. I see.
Even after experiencing what happened yesterday.
It seems I lacked consideration.
" Of course. This way. "
Calmly leading the plush, I bring it over to the counter for now.
Unfortunately, our store is takeout only, so we don't have chairs set up.
" Ah, it's alright. I prefer standing. "
Fortunately, the stuffed plush had an understanding personality.
How kind.
"Um, so I believe you agree that I am a person who shouldn't originally be here."
" Of course, that goes without saying. "
"T-Then! May I leave now?"
" Pardon? We can't have that. "
Mmm. Strictly speaking, it is the supplier's issue.
To mistake a perfectly living person—no, plush—for a piñata.
What a bunch of absolute idiots.
" I can't just send you off like this. "
"H-Hiiik!"
However, if the supplier put it in the cold storage on their own,
that is, would the Ministry of Food and Drug Safety believe me if I said I hadn't checked the delivered items?
'Even if they believe me, not inspecting the delivery is still my fault in its own right...!'
In the end, it will be hard for our store to escape responsibility.
" Right. I mean that I can't send you off empty-handed. The lollipops in our store are very delicious. Everyone who bought them gave glowing reviews. "
"Huh? Ah, yes."
" It was the supplier's mistake, but our side is also largely at fault for not checking properly. I'll pay for it, so please have a bite and recover your vitality. "
In that case, the only way is to appease them with a bribe!
Well, even setting aside such worldly calculations, it was proper courtesy to show.
As I rummaged through the piñatas looking for one in good condition to split open—
:: Did you forget? ::
:: You went to get a new one because the piñata spoiled, and that's how this happened. ::
Mmm. Right.
A hamster plush suddenly screaming from among the piñatas.
I was so startled by that that I completely forgot about the piñata, which was the very reason I entered the storage.
I should go back to the storage and fetch one.
" Please wait a moment. I will bring out a fresh one. "
"Ah, yes. Yes!"
The stuffed plush nodded its head repeatedly.
Is it really looking forward to it that much?
Its expression is bright. I ought to do my best to live up to those expectations.
"Take your time coming out! I mean, please take your time! Don't mind me."
" Ah, yes. Of course. "
However, as the host keeping a guest, I can't keep them waiting for long.
It was the moment I turned my back to go get a new piñata.
A faint clanking sound echoed softly.
Just as I was about to take a step, assuming it was a sound from the customer accidentally bumping into the umbrella stand—
BANG— !!!
A loud sound echoes.
Just like the kind of sound a firecracker would make when going off.
:: As if that would work. ::
:: Analysis on that was already finished when you got hit by it last time. ::
Every now and then, Bell says incomprehensible things.
Judging by her usual behavior, I suspect she's flexing her intellectual superiority....
By now, I'm completely used to it, so without caring much,
I turned around to check the cause of the sound, and—
Roll, roll.
A pea rolling on the floor, coming from goodness knows where.
It was strange.
Our candy store doesn't carry vegetables.
As I raised my head, which had been looking down—
"Ah, ahh—."
There was the hamster customer-nim, trembling uncontrollably.
While holding a gun in one hand.
" ...Customer-nim. "
I admit it. I got slightly worked up.
And so, my voice naturally raised as well.
:: Did you just shoot this, customer-nim...? ::