Discharge (2)
Creeeak...
I stepped into Bae Eunsol's place. She called it a 1.5-room, but it was the usual officetel layout—an open storage unit marking the boundary between the bedroom and the living area.
It wasn't exactly new construction, but the interior had been remodeled. And Eunsol must have been the tidy type; the whole place was a girl's room done up cute and neat.
Rustle...
I set the bag of drinks and snacks on the table in the living room. Nothing fancy—just beer and highballs from the convenience store nearby, plus some simple dried snacks.
"Sit over there."
Eunsol kept that cool, distant tone, still holding me at arm's length. As if that changed the fact that she'd dragged her boyfriend's friend into her own home.
"How much does a place like this go for?"
I asked while pulling the drinks and snacks out of the bag. Eunsol answered as she took glasses and plates from the cupboard.
"Two thousand deposit, nine hundred a month."
"No idea if that's cheap or expensive. I'm thinking of getting my own place once I go back to school, so I'm pretty interested in the market."
"For this neighborhood, it's on the cheap side. Need ice?"
"I'll be fine without."
Eunsol only put ice in her own glass and brought it over. She hung her coat on the rack, adjusted the short pants she was wearing, then sat with her legs tucked sideways.
"What do you want first?"
"Highball."
Still short answers. She was sticking to monosyllables just to keep her composure, but the tension on her face didn't belong there at all.
Splash! Glug-glug-glug...
We each poured a glass of highball. I lifted mine, thinking we might at least clink, but Eunsol already had a mouthful—throat dry, maybe.
"Ahh..."
I let out an awkward little sigh of satisfaction after the first swallow. She kept acting like that and it was getting way too cute—what was I supposed to do?
"So you're going back to school, Taekgu? Where'd you say you go again?"
"Seojapdae."
"You studied some, huh? How'd you even end up friends with Park Yeongmin?"
Finally the words started flowing from Eunsol. Of course, the way her eyes still didn't know where to land made her feelings completely transparent.
"Friends? We're just military cohort, right?"
"What's that supposed to mean? Can I tell Yeongmin that straight?"
"Yeah. Go ahead."
"..."
At last Eunsol's gaze locked cleanly onto me. I'd said something a little loaded, but there were reasons for every word.
For one, it was already clear we hadn't been real friends. And I had no desire to prod her conscience by playing up any brotherhood with that guy.
"What about you, Eunsol? Making enough to cover the rent?"
"Around two-fifty? I'm still just an apprentice, so. Once I open my own shop someday I'll be making a lot more."
"Someone pulling two-fifty and dropping nine hundred on rent alone seems to have a fair number of luxury pieces around the house."
I said it while looking over the designer bags and wallets sitting on the open shelf. I didn't know that world well, but I could at least read logos like Chanel or Hermès.
"Got a problem? I'm buying them with money I earned myself."
"Of course not. Next time I see Yeongmin I'll tell him to put some of that paycheck into his girlfriend instead of those coins he can't even trade properly."
"That bastard's still doing crypto?"
The word "coin" alone twisted Eunsol's face like it triggered PTSD. So the whole "my mom's sick" story really had been pure bullshit.
If it had been true, that would've been the first thing out of his girlfriend's mouth.
"Come to think of it, this is the first time you and I have actually talked this long, Eunsol."
"Because you always made it awkward."
"Isn't it the other way around? I thought you hated me for always barging into your couple time."
"I never did."
"..."
I studied her eyes for a moment, trying to read what was underneath. Of course she flushed and looked away immediately, so that failed.
"Staring through people like that isn't polite."
"I'm drunk."
"Right. Without the alcohol you wouldn't even try talking to me."
"You've been saying weird things since earlier. So what you're saying is we've both been under the misunderstanding that the other one was uncomfortable this whole time?"
Gulp-gulp...
Eunsol didn't answer—just took another drink. Even if it was only highball, at the pace she was going and knowing her usual tolerance, she'd be gone soon.
"You said the shop was in Itaewon, right?"
"Moved to Yeonnam-dong."
"That's even farther. You wanted to rest after work and Yeongmin dragged you out—must've been pissed."
"Can you stop talking about Yeongmin?"
A little irritation sharpened her voice. But wasn't that the funny part?
Considering how little we usually had between us, Park Yeongmin was the only topic we could both claim.
And yet from the start Eunsol had been quietly trying to cut him out of the conversation. As if tonight's drinks here had nothing to do with him at all.
"Hey, Eunsol. Can I ask you one thing I'm curious about?"
"What?"
"How'd you end up dating Yeongmin? Inside the unit it was basically one of the top three unsolved mysteries. We used to burn every single day over how a guy like him managed to land a girlfriend as incredible as you."
"You guys really had nothing better to do... We dated since high school. Broke up around the time he enlisted, then he reached out again once he made private first class."
"Why'd you break up then?"
"Just..."
Eunsol let the sentence trail off, clearly not wanting to go there. I'd have to guess from here.
"Does it have something to do with the tattooing?"
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"You called yourself an apprentice earlier. That means there's an 'oyabun' too. And what if that person happened to be a man—someone who not only taught you the work but was pretty attractive as a man as well..."
"Shut your mouth. What the hell do you take me for?"
Eunsol flared up, genuinely angry. Because I'd just painted her as the cheap type who'd two-time her boyfriend the second he left for the army.
"I don't think that's a bad thing."
"Does that even make sense? The thing guys hate most is a girl who's easy like that."
"What even is the standard for 'easy'? It's not like you stamped a contract promising forever. A better guy just showed up later, that's all. If you'd met him first, you wouldn't have given Yeongmin a second glance, right? Am I wrong?"
"..."
The light in Eunsol's eyes wavered as she listened. Yeah—I'd hit the mark.
"Figured... Then trouble cropped up with that guy too. Whatever it was as a man and woman, at the end of the day it was still boss and employee. Realistic problems must've come up, so you moved to Yeonnam-dong. Otherwise there was no reason to switch neighborhoods and make the commute longer."
"What do you even know to talk like that?"
"Obviously I know nothing about you. That's exactly why I keep asking—because I want to know a little more."
"...?"
It took Eunsol a second to catch the meaning. Even so, the slight widening of her eyes told me she'd grasped the intent behind it.
"You've been saying nothing but weird stuff since earlier..."
"So you were alone again, and that's when Yeongmin called. I'm glad the two of you got back together."
"Glad about what?"
"Otherwise I might've actually had to pull an all-nighter at the PC bang tonight."
"I never said you could sleep here."
"You're seriously thinking of kicking me out? Even a stray dog gets temporary shelter for a night if you pick it up."
"You're not a stray dog. You're a person. And my boyfriend's friend."
"I already said we're not friends. And as long as Yeongmin doesn't know, right?"
"...?"
Eunsol sensed the conversation turning more and more explicit. I saw her throat move, just barely.
"Why are you being like this all of a sudden? You shouldn't be doing this to me."
"Why not?"
"It's weird! You never said a single word to me normally—why today of all days?"
"It wasn't that I didn't. I couldn't. Yeongmin was always stuck to your side—what was the point of talking? I just quietly swallowed the anger alone."
"Why were you angry?"
"..."
I deliberately didn't answer. When I wordlessly took another drink, curiosity exploded on Eunsol's side instead.
"Answer me! What were you angry about?"
"I don't really want to say."
"Are you kidding? You get someone curious and then just shut up?"
"Haa..."
I let out a heavy sigh like I was wrestling with something enormous and set the glass down. Even that wasn't enough—I let about five seconds of silence hang before I finally opened my mouth.
"You remember the first time you came for visitation? We met for the first time during his private first class leave, and not long after that you came to visit."
"I-I remember..."
Eunsol stammered like someone with something to hide. Of course she would—she couldn't possibly have forgotten what happened that day.
"Our unit had a separate visitation room, right? So before you came out to meet the rest of us, you and Yeongmin spent a little time in there first."
"So what? We just talked a bit."
"Yeongmin's version was a little different."
"W-what do you mean? Did he actually..."
"Yeah. After you left he told us everything. Said you did it with your mouth in there. Said you sucked him so carefully and thoroughly that he came too fast, so you did it a second time. Said he hurriedly grabbed tissues for you to spit into and it was so thick and sticky it stuck completely..."
"You crazy bastard! He told you that!?"
Eunsol was properly worked up, snorting through her nose. Between Yeongmin bragging to his cohort and me feeding it right back to her, the place was crawling with lunatics.
"Yeah. The second I heard it I got angry just like you."
"Why were you angry? Guys talk about that shit and snicker among themselves, don't they? You turn someone into a complete fool and then..."
"I was angry at all of them. At Yeongmin for using his girlfriend—who came all the way to visit—as some kind of achievement, and at the guys who laughed and treated you like a joke. But the person I was angriest at was someone else."
"Who?"
"You."
"Are you insane? Why get mad at me?"
"What am I supposed to do when I'm angry? Just imagining the scene makes the blood reverse in my veins—what do you want from me? The thought of those pretty lips of yours wrapping around that bastard Yeongmin's made me hate everything. That's why I treated you cold every time I saw you."
"That still doesn't explain anything. What does it matter to you what your cohort does with his own girlfriend? Just laugh and joke around like the others—why get angry by yourself?"
"Because I like you."
"..."
The atmosphere blacked out all at once. At the absurd confession Eunsol's face hardened like never before, and even her breathing stopped—dead quiet.
"Strictly speaking it wasn't just now. It's been like that the whole time, from the past. From the day I first saw you I thought about you every single day. Pretended not to care while constantly asking Yeongmin when you were coming to visit. Leaving on overnight passes and leave that lined up with yours, never knowing when to insert myself or pull out—all of it was because of that."
"..."
It was a dangerous gamble. Looking at the relationship map of me, Park Yeongmin, and Bae Eunsol, she would've been fully justified in throwing me out on the spot.
But I didn't see it that way. Over the past year, the person most heavily exposed to the special pheromones I gave off was, without question, Bae Eunsol.
Mixed with the familiar scent of Park Yeongmin's, it had set off some unidentifiable chemical reaction. And somewhere in the middle of that, my presence inside her had grown without her realizing it.
I'd known for a while that her eyes had started turning toward me instead of Yeongmin. She wanted to talk, wanted to meet my gaze—but she couldn't stab the boyfriend she'd already betrayed once in the back again.
That was the tightrope Eunsol had been walking between conscience and corruption. The real reason I'd kept my distance.
Because the moment I answered that look, I knew exactly what would happen.
"Eunsol?"
"What..."
Her voice came out weak. Even after I'd broken every rule of friendship with a confession that might as well have been one, she wasn't throwing me out—she was only waiting for whatever came next.
"Can I come sit next to you?"
I was the one who shattered the invisible wall of taboo between us first. So I hoped she'd give me the answer that matched.
Nod... nod...
Eunsol only dipped her head the tiniest bit, wordless. She finally shook off the guilt wrapping her whole body and decided to follow the pull of instinct.
I know this isn't the right thing either. After doing the same shit enough times, I've at least got a code about myself.
But Park Yeongmin crossed the line first. You ate my money—so I'll just have to eat what's yours the same way.