Figure It Out Yourself (1)

Carla's face was dark when she came back to the room.

Part of me had braced for her to try seducing me again the moment she returned, but she simply slipped into my arms without a word and stayed there in silence for a long while.

Only once she'd regained some composure did we pack our things together and board the carriage.

The carriage's destination: Arcadia Imperial Magic Academy.

Inside the swaying carriage, it wasn't until around dawn that Carla carefully spoke up.

"Evan."

"Mmh... hrm? Ah. What is it."

Wiping the drool from my face, I stretched with a long yawn, still half-asleep. Sleeping in a carriage does a number on your neck. And I was starving besides.

"I would seek your wisdom."

"For what?"

"You know the Third Princess?"

"Sure do."

"Then you'll know her fiancé, Adrian Belloc."

"..."

"It seems Adrian has gone and caused some kind of major incident."

"Again?"

"Again...?"

Seriously, Adrian, you bastard — why does your name keep coming up here?

Did he preemptively wipe out the late-game villains? Or break one of those absolute taboos you must never touch before the tutorial?

"What did he do?"

"I couldn't find out. But..."

"But?"

"The Third Princess wishes to break off her engagement with Adrian. She has begged that he be made to meet a political death."

"Whoohoo."

That goddamn retard.

Even if the bastard only skimmed the surface of the game, he was bound to have seen the Iris virginity scene — the highest-quality, most famous scene in the entire game.

Against a girl who'd have handed her virginity over on a silver platter if he'd just kept his nose clean until enrollment — what the hell did he do to earn that much hate!?

"House Belloc is a great noble family rivaling a duchy. I'm simply at a loss as to how I might ruin Adrian's reputation..."

"..."

"What's with that look on your face?"

"What happens if a situation comes along where you can kill him physically instead of politically?"

"Then..."

Watching Carla's face radiate ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠open hostility toward Adrian, I let a faint smile slip out.

'I still don't know exactly what's going on, but things seem to be flowing roughly along the original, so that's a relief.'

Honestly, it was running half off the rails, but for now it somehow seemed to be untangling itself along canon lines.

In the original story, Carla's hatred of Adrian had two roots: jealousy that he'd stolen the Third Princess she loved, and resentment over his enjoying House Harben's backing.

Now, whatever the reason, she bore him hostility all the same.

Which meant it shouldn't interfere with my taking on the growth quest of Leah Harben — the main tank of the protagonist's party.

When Carla tried to kill Adrian, Leah was supposed to step between them and block her blade... that was how her once-shattered will was set upright again.

"Heh."

"What are you laughing at?"

"Just 'cause."

I shook my head at Carla with a sheepish grin.

I'd have to buy Adrian a drink or two when I ran into him at the academy. Pass along some game knowledge while I was at it — tell him exactly how much of a hellish grind this hyung had put in to keep the game on track.

The enrollment procedure wrapped up so anticlimactically that I couldn't fathom why they'd told us to come in person.

Carla arranged a simple tea party with the prominent noble children who'd arrived ahead of us.

As if that were all.

From a tea party hosted by the Third Princess, to a courtesy call on the Headmaster, a welcome banquet for the new noble students, a luncheon with the elders of the Knight Faculty, and audiences with the officials of the Imperial Sponsorship Association.

Before she'd even set foot in the academy, her schedule was strung end to end with the grand engagements so typical of high nobility.

For five straight days, she'd be too busy to breathe except in her sleep.

My wife, the social butterfly.

While her husband was an outcast among outcasts — a full-blown hermit living on a lakeshore.

"So this is what high noble life is like?"

"It's the life we're going to be living."

Carla gazed at my reaction as though it were adorable and flashed a bewitching smile.

"The moment I get to introduce you to everyone — I'm not just impatient for it, I can scarcely breathe, Evan..."

"I, uh... was thinking of heading home for five days."

"Wh-why!?"

"We're engaged and I still haven't told my father, which sits a little wrong with me. And with everything that's happened, I want to rest and recover."

"Now that you mention it, I haven't greeted Father yet. Let's go togeth—"

"You come along, and the engagement's off."

"Why..."

Pouting, Carla begged me again and again to spend the time before enrollment together, but I deflected her demands like a blade.

Why?

Because, fuck, if I spent a whole week glued to this girl, I'd be relieved of my virginity before I could stack a single stat.

I'd only just punched my magic aptitude up to C — no way in hell was I starting my Kept Man life without learning a single skill.

'Besides, once academy life starts, it's doubtful I'll have any time to fish at all.'

For the five days left before enrollment, I intended to fish like a man possessed — every cast I could squeeze out.

At bare minimum I'd forge two S-rank stats, and if the chance arose, picking up a simple spell or two would be the cherry on top.

"See you in five days~"

"W-wait, Evan!"

"Yep, take care. I'll be at the main gate by eight on enrollment day. Love ya!"

"L-love..."

Heh heh. What a romance noob.

Fitting for an eroge heroine — one "I love you" and she caved on the spot, blushing red as a beet.

'Even in the original, for all her wicked-woman antics, she couldn't budge an inch whenever the Third Princess bowed her head and asked.'

After tucking my academy pass and the handful of gold coins Carla had pressed on me safely into my pocket, I boarded the very carriage I'd arrived in.

A full hour into the ride.

After rattling down the long slope, the moment the carriage finally found level ground, a vast lake unfolded beyond the window.

'O Lake Ordo~ thy prodigal son has returned.'

Fare paid, I kicked open the door of the house and filled my lungs with the unmistakable scent of a widower's home and fish.

"Well I'll be~ so ye went and came back, did ye?"

"It's me, Da. I got hitched."

"What girl'd ye go and get tangled up with?"

"A noble."

"Our boy's turned out right capable, ain't he."

Father chortled and took a swig from his beer bottle.

"Married a right fine woman, I did. I'll bring her to meet ye sometime, and move ye somewhere nice."

"This here's the best place there is."

"In a grand house ye'd never want for coin yer whole life long. Ye still like it here best of all?"

"Well now~ we oughta have that talk first. Should I pack my things?"

"Just hold out till I graduate, that's all."

Father snickered, then booted my fishing rod across the floor toward me.

"Seeing as yer here, catch us a month's worth of vittles."

"What's this? Why's the rod so bone-dry? Ye been livin' on gruel while I was gone?"

"Well I'll be, is this my son or some demon? If yer gonna nag, git out~ And if yer gonna catch vittles, git out all the same!"

Father's trademark, carefree-as-ever ease put me somewhat at ease.

I'd gone to a ducal house and untangled a whole string of incidents. Thanks to my schemes, I'd gotten a saint killed and gotten engaged to boot. Yet the lakeside lay just as calm as ever, with not a damn thing in sight but me and Father.

But maybe that was what a year and more of doing nothing but fish here did to a man.

This stillness — this thrill of never knowing what might bite — set my heart pounding.

"Phew... fished all day and the haul's kind of bland."

Normally at least one super rare was bound to turn up.

Maybe because I'd let the rod sit for a few days, the bite felt lousy today.

In the end, the sun sank completely.

After laying out a full spread of spicy fish stew and fresh sashimi for Father with the ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠day's catch, I grabbed a bottle of soda and climbed back onto the boat.

One hour like that.

Two.

Coming home had been a mistake, apparently. Word must have gotten around in that short span, because the fish were wiped clean out.

...At this rate I was going to strike out completely today. What to do — move to a new spot?

"Agility just needs one more point for S. Dammit... come on... yawwwn..."

Ugh, I was so fucking sleepy. Maybe I should just go home and sleep it off.

If I fell in the lake like this, my clothes would get soaked.......

"Mmh... mmh..."

—SPLASH!

Just as I was about to pitch over the side of the boat, nodding off, the fishing float abruptly vanished beneath the surface.

"!?"

The heavy resistance shooting up my wrist blasted the sleep away in an instant.

This was, without a doubt...

A monster catch I'd be lucky to hook a few times a year!

'At this weight......'

If memory served, only two things had ever felt this heavy: the Thrashing King Freshwater Eel that granted +100 Strength, and the Blue-Backed Winged Mackerel that doubled fishing efficiency.

"Heave-ho!!"

Hooking my foot on the boat's edge to anchor myself, I hauled back on the rod with everything I had.

—CREEEAK!

The line drew taut, and the rod bent like a bow.

"I am NOT letting go!!! Come on then, you bastard......!"

I arched my back to keep from being dragged in, and after repeating the give-and-take over and over—

—FWOOSH!!

At last I forced the massive shadow up from the lakebed to burst through the surface.

"Caught it!! Hell yes!"

Hot damn, it was nearly the size of a person!

Nearly the size of a......

"......"

No. Shit. It is a person?

"Cough...! Cough... Why... couldn't I die?"

"Are you a suicide hopeful too?"

"...What?"

"Seriously, I don't get why everyone keeps trying to croak in front of my house."

"I-I'm sorry. HATCHOO!"

Unbelievable. Was our plot of land cursed or something?

Why did so many people ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠come here to die?

"So what do you do, anyway?"

"I am trash."

"You look the part. If you're going to die, go die somewhere far away. Understood?"

"Yessir..."

The orange-haired woman slumped her shoulders and huddled in the corner of the boat.

"..."

Tch.

Seeing a woman far smaller than Carla hanging so utterly limp made one corner of my heart ache for no good reason.

"Hey, miss..."

Over the blanket I'd thrown across her to stop the shivering, a system message crept up unnoticed.

'Hm?'

Leah Harben.

The bread-and-butter pick among bread-and-butter picks, the one who shouldered the party's tanking from the early game all the way to the finale of Lilium Crown.

Daughter of Duke Harben, foremost among Lilium Crown's three ducal houses!

The most popular character in the game after the main protagonist Iris, with the second-most fan-service scenes to boot!

So why was a girl like that... trying to die right here, with enrollment staring her in the face?

"Did you lose your savings on stocks? Pull some leverage, maybe?"

"Stocks...? Levera...what?"

"It's a thing that exists."

"My friend died. I swore I would protect her for my whole life. I couldn't even tell something had gone wrong with her."

"......"

"I couldn't stay at her side. I couldn't even recover her body..."

Leah clutched at her chest with trembling hands.

"I never even got to draw my sword properly for her sake! I'm unfit to be called a knight... waaah...!!!!"

"..."

A friend, huh.

At the point Leah Harben enrolled in the original story, the Saint would have been her one and only friend.

She'd have been ready and willing to lay down her life for the Saint — friend and sworn lord in one.

Even in the Saint's rampage a week after enrollment, she'd shielded her — going so far as to point her blade at the Emperor himself.

There was exactly one reason she'd draw on the Emperor while prepared to defy the whole world: because House Harben's creed was one thing and one thing only — Only the Lord.

They were a band of madmen in knights' armor who would endure any torture for the one they'd sworn to serve — and if need be, gladly toss away their very lives.

Leah, the family head's own daughter, took that teaching to heart more faithfully than anyone. So faithfully, in fact, that she crossed the line into pathological devotion — and she was famous for it.

If her lord said breathe, she breathed.

If her lord said die, she died.

She didn't so much as start thinking with her own head until she was ordered to think...

'Leah Harben is a batshit-insane, mentally-ill, menhera, obsessive yandere knight bitch who derives pure joy from entrusting her entire life to someone else.'

That was the perfect conclusion on Leah Harben, deliverable by any game addict who dropped dead after ten-thousand-plus hours in this game.

"Hold on, you swore to protect her. ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠How did you end up unable to stay by her side?"

Explain that to me.

Why was the Saint's personal bodyguard missing from the imperial audience!? You were a ducal daughter — you could have attended openly even without bodyguard credentials!

Why didn't you go? WHY!?

"I'd caught a terrible cold and my fever was over 102 degrees... so my lord commanded me to rest."

"No matter how sick you were—"

"That's right!! It's all because I accepted it. I believed that place was the safest in the world, so I let my guard down......"

Leah's lips quivered.

"Ah..."

"My lord commanded me to rest, so I merely followed orders! I should have disobeyed and protected her, I should haveeeee!!! WAAAAAAH!!!"

'Shit. This has well and truly derailed.'

In the original, Leah would have been unable to escape a death sentence over that chain of incidents. Waiting only for her day of execution, drowning in self-blame, she was meant to be saved by the Third Princess's pleas and live on as a lowborn slave for Iris's sake.

...At first she'd loathe the Emperor's daughter who killed her lord, hate her guts. But little by little she'd open her heart to the Third Princess.

And in the end, during some major incident in Chapter 1, she'd take up the sword once more, vowing to live as Iris's sword and shield — that was the clichéd arc it was all supposed to follow!

But what was I supposed to do about this?

I'd gone and had the Saint — who wasn't due to die for another week — lose her head just the other day, vaporizing Leah's main event in its entirety.

With Carla I'd somehow managed to flip the fallout and keep things on the rails, but with Leah I couldn't even begin to grasp the right approach. What the hell was I supposed to do?

What trick was there to pull to restore a lost execution event!?

Damn it, short of pointing a sword at the Emperor, what conceivable way was there to sentence a ducal daughter to death...

Mom... I am so fucked here.

Sorry, Adrian!

Your party tank slot is VACANT!!

"Haah... maybe I should've had the Saint's neck cut a different way..."

"Yessir...... no, wait just a moment."

"...Ah."

Leah, who'd been sobbing with snot trickling all the way to the tip of her nose, suddenly turned stern and slowly lifted her head.

"What did you just say..?"

While I was still fumbling for words, Leah had already crept up right in front of me and seized me by the collar.

"You cut the Saint's neck?"

Between strands of wet orange hair, two eyes flashed sharp as blades.

"You. What is your relationship with my lord."