Chapter 44
Chapter 44
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 44
Chapter Title: The Outsider Who Doesn't Dream
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***
Perhaps because of the incident at dinner, not long after I threw myself onto the bed, I began wandering through a dream.
I walked aimlessly through a tunnel where it was impossible to tell if it was dark or bright, then looked around to find a terribly familiar room coming into view.
A computer optimized for document work, a white desk. And a 500,000-won office chair. Beyond the glass window, various lab equipment was visible.
This place was all too familiar to me, who had commuted there every day for a full five years, but not particularly missed. It was the graduate research lab.
The only difference from usual was that the keyboard at my spot was smashed and rolling on the floor.
I was the type who cared about keeping my workspace tidy, so times when it was this messy could be counted on one hand.
So it should have come to mind right away what had happened here, but my mind was foggy, like it was shrouded in mist, and thoughts wouldn't process properly.
When was it? When was I so furious that I smashed the lab keyboard and hurled it to the floor...
"Hey! Jeong Yi-an!!! Get your shit together!! Fuck!!! Fuck!!!! If those damn Chinese bastards publish first, you're fucking done for!! Get up!!!"
I closed my eyes once and opened them to find myself sprawled on the lab floor, my collar grabbed by some guy.
It was Song Chang-won from my grad school days.
We'd never gotten along from start to finish in grad school, but we acknowledged each other's abilities, or so it seemed.
But why was this guy yelling at me right now?
"You fuckin' bastard, you said you wanted to be a scientist. Postdoc abroad, Nature papers, become a professor—you're the one who said all that. If you let them steal your patents and papers, what the hell are you gonna do then? How are you gonna be a scientist?!"
Hearing up to here, hazy memories started coming back to me about what was going on.
A few months earlier, there had been an academic exchange with a Chinese university for research funding purposes, and those bastards had stolen our lab's research data during that time.
We only found out after they registered the tech-related patents first.
In truth, it wasn't valuable enough to overturn the course of human science history or make headlines.
But it was more than enough to ruin the future of one PhD student who had poured time and effort into it.
At this point, both my parents had passed away in accidents, I had no savings, and this theft meant the PhD research funding I'd been counting on was going down the drain too...
I vaguely accepted that this was my limit.
"Even if they stole the experimental data, how the hell did those Chinese bastards who started later than you churn out results that fast? That's all fabricated data for sure."
The Song Chang-won I'd met before regression, rotten human as he was, had none of the naive high school bullshit left—he was pretty much a fully formed person.
So when I heard that crap at dinner earlier... I was pissed, sure, but also a bit surprised. It was the first time I'd seen that unfinished side of him.
I was admiring how he stayed calm and analyzed the situation even then, but in the end, this was a dream made of my memories.
So my mouth moved without my control.
"So... what do you want me to do? I called everywhere that could help, and they all said I had to handle it myself. Whatever it is, those Chinese guys have some big shot backing them that's hard to touch."
"Then we fabricate data first too and hit 'em with lawsuits over papers and patents. Fuck, I got money, good family. If it goes south, I'll help you..."
"Chang-won."
"..."
"What I wanted to do was be a scientist. Not a research grant-eating machine."
"You... Jeong Yi-an, you fuckin' bastard, don't tell me..."
"I'm quitting being a scientist."
After that, our relationship went completely sideways.
I patched together my miscellaneous research results like rags to graduate with my PhD, then did half-assed work at a hospital lab until I died.
Song Chang-won... I heard he kept succeeding after that and became a university professor young, but he never contacted me once.
◇◇◇◆◇◇◇ It had been a while since I dreamed of pre-regression times.
But a grad school dream, of all things. Guess today was gonna be an unlucky day.
...
This incident was definitely a tragedy for me back then—I was really heartbroken—but to me now, it's just some old story that doesn't stir much.
I'm already an uncle whose dreams have vanished without a trace, so if someone told me to go back to grad school, I'd refuse even with a knife to my throat.
Still... with this bad old memory resurfacing, I briefly pondered if there was a way to use it against Song Chang-won himself.
.
.
.
Gifted Education Program, Day 1.
After breakfast, a young man who introduced himself as the escort teacher gathered all the students in the auditorium.
The reason we were all gathered was orientation.
It was a session to introduce the overall programs of this education course and reveal the assignments we'd be given.
The auditorium was oversized for just a dozen or so students, so there were plenty of empty seats, but Han Si-a naturally sat right next to me.
Before sleeping last night, we'd agreed to 'crush Song Chang-won and all the other participants led by him,' but we'd decided to plan the details after orientation.
To analyze the orientation content in detail and devise a strategy, we'd even divided roles.
First, Han Si-a would take notes on the key points while listening to the orientation.
And since my handwriting sucks, I'd use my smartphone camera to record the whole thing as video.
All the info we gathered during the day would be shared in the room after dinner, where we'd strategize together.
Even while recording, I could grasp the rough outline of the program from listening.
First off, the course culminates in final presentations on the evening of Day 6.
The assignment topic is 'The Path Forward for Korea's Bio Sector, in Decline Since the Professor Hwang Scandal.'
Looking at the explanation, I inwardly freaked out a bit, thinking this was no level for middle or high schoolers.
2011 was when government investment in biotech started ramping up, and I heard Samsung Biologics was just emerging around then...
True to form for a program for elite kids, the content directly reflected the latest government policy trends.
There were also daily lectures by renowned experts in the field and outdoor experiential learning programs.
They said these would be a big help for the assignment.
Curious about the lecturers, I quickly searched: current university professors, government lab directors, biotech founders—all heavy hitters.
Plus, they handed out the latest model laptops to every student for the project—brand new, still in the box.
Of course, no need to return them; they were ours from now on.
'So this is the world upper-class kids live in?'
For the first time since joining this program, I truly felt their overwhelming wealth.
After distributing the laptops, the escort teacher running the orientation—having considered the assignment's difficulty upfront—recommended that students actively cooperate with each other.
His words made sense.
The topic 'The Path Forward for Korea's Bio Sector, in Decline Since the Professor Hwang Scandal' meant you had to understand past incidents in biotech and their impact on the field, then propose a vision considering current conditions and future environments.
Just thinking about it, mountains of research were needed, and each bit was tough for middle/high schoolers' limited knowledge. By workload or difficulty, this assignment far exceeded what kids could do alone.
...But then he dropped something impossible to ignore.
"Our gifted program emphasizes student autonomy, so during this course, you're free to act individually if needed or even do your final presentation solo—we won't make an issue of it."
From the moment I heard individual action was allowed, I started doubting if this program really wanted students to cooperate.
Human nature is to split the team and go solo rather than compromise differing opinions.
Even more shocking: outside the 3-4 hours of daily lectures, it was total free time.
Meaning students had to handle research, meetings, and prep on their own during that.
And the escort teacher added that he wouldn't interfere if a student ditched the assignment, holed up in the dorm, or went sightseeing at Daegwallyeong!!
...In my view, this was hellish group work incarnate.
Of course, everyone knows maximum cooperation is the way given the difficulty.
However, excluding the difficulty itself, every other condition blatantly sabotaged cooperation.
The more serious about the assignment, the worse team relations would get, and there'd be no justification to keep slackers or quitters in the group. Under these rules, group work was doomed to implode.
Thinking this far, I couldn't hold back and whispered my thoughts to Han Si-a next to me, asking her opinion...
"The assignment changes yearly, but guaranteeing maximum student autonomy never has. I don't know the reason, but maybe it's the adults' way of saying 'it's summer break, learn while relaxing moderately'?"
This free-range group assignment style was the same every year.
No wonder the kids who supposedly networked yearly seemed oddly distant from each other.
After hellish group assignments like this annually, they'd fought tooth and nail and soured relations.
But the adults must know that already—why do it? I couldn't understand.
It was like they were goading the kids to fight each other.
.
.
.
...That aside,
Fight each other... fight each other.
At this point, I felt an idea for crushing 'Song Chang-won and the kids' forming just out of reach.