School Life is Fucking Spectacular # 1
School Life is Fucking Spectacular # 1
Goddamn, I thought I was gonna fucking fly! How the hell is that voice so goddamn loud, huh?!
"Wait?! I'm actually flying?!"
—Fwooooosh!
My body was actually airborne!
—Crash!
"Aaaaauuuggghhh!"
The breath exploded out of me as my back smashed into the window! Fu-ck! No, this seriously hurts like hell! This is a goddamn car crash!
"Agh, fuck!"
"What in the world is all this commotion, Kim Geun-cheol!!! Can't you stand up straight!!!"
At some point, the Chairwoman had risen from her seat and was glaring at me with eyes burning like fire as she roared. Is this place full of nothing but scary women? The instructor was like that too, and so was the Chairwoman—it felt like I was going to die of sheer terror.
"Ack! No! Chairwoman, ma'am! That isn't it!"
So I begged desperately, trembling all over.
"What excuse are you planning, Kim Geun-cheol!!! Stand up straight right now!!!"
"I want to stand uuupppp, butttt!!!"
—Ruuuumble!
The gale kept blasting out, and the wind pressure made it absolutely impossible to stand up!
Let me stand up! Please!
"Please stop the wind! I can't get up!!!"
"Hm? Ah. I must have spoken too harshly. You may rise now."
"Yes... I'm up."
—Fwoo.
Finally, I'm up. How can one person be this goddamn spectacular? Is that window even okay? Looking at it, it is. Wait... did they install bulletproof glass for this reason?
"Sit. Kim Geun-cheol."
"Yes..."
I walked over to the chair and sat down. I'm seriously nervous. If I get thrashed in here, there's nowhere I can go to complain about it.
"What business brings you to me?"
"Well, that is..."
"Speak properly!!!"
"Yes! I came to apologize!!! I'm sorry!!!"
—Whoosh!
I shot to my feet and bent at the waist to a full ninety degrees, apologizing with the utmost formality. I even clasped my hands together politely while I did it.
"I'm deeply sorry for shouting profanity in front of everyone on the day of the entrance ceremony! I was extremely nervous, and I was so startled I reflexively yelled!"
Even after speaking, I was gauging the reaction. Can I straighten my back now? I tried to peek ahead through squinted eyes.
"Ohh, what's this. Is that what it was?"
A much softer voice reached me.
"Good. You did well to come. If Kim Geun-cheol had not come to apologize, I might have held a grudge! Hahahahahahahahaha!"
"Ha, haha... O-of course I had to apologize. After all, I did something so insolent."
"You understand well!"
—Bam!
Huh?
—Bam! Bam!
"Uh, uhh?! Uhh...!"
For a moment, I had absolutely no idea what was happening to me. I barely managed to piece it together... right.
"How very commendable! Kim Geun-cheol! Yes! Apologizing is enough! A young man might do such a thing! I, the Chairwoman, have forgiven it all!"
Without me noticing, the Chairwoman had come up beside me and was slapping me on the back—whap, whap. No. Bam. Bam.
—Bam! Bam!
"Eeeaaaarrrtthhhquuaaaakkkeee!!!!"
"What? No! Kim Geun-cheol! Are you alright!"
Gahk!
"Pull yourself together!!!"
* * *
"Agh."
It was a seriously spectacular day.
It's mind-blowing enough that I dozed off playing a game and woke up inside the game world. But from the entrance ceremony until the end of the school day, not a single thing went properly.
—Whump! Whump!
It's so freaking embarrassing I can't stand it!
"Aaaaarrrrggghhh!"
No matter how much I kick the blanket, this burning feeling won't go away! It's literally one mortifying experience after another...! I can't pull myself together!
How the hell am I supposed to live now?
"And my back hurts like a bitch, dammit...!"
When I crashed to the ground like a basketball, the flustered Chairwoman shook me, and I seriously thought this woman was trying to tenderize my flesh or something.
She even muttered something at me, looking puzzled as if a basketball hit the floor and didn't bounce back up, but it didn't really register in my ears. I was in too much pain.
The important thing is probably that I came back to the dorm piggybacked by the Chairwoman.
"..."
I can't forget the stares of the other students who saw me being carried by the Chairwoman...!
"Status wiiinnnddoooowww!"
After kicking the blanket and stewing in my shame, I pulled up my status window for a paradigm shift.
―――――――――――――――――
[Status Window - Kim Geun-cheol]
[Rank : F]
「 Strength : 13 」
「 Technique : 12 」
「 Stamina : 12 」
「 Durability : 10 」
「 Magic Power : 10 」
―――――――――――――――――
No changes, of course.
"Give me a quest or something, you bastard!"
I don't even know what the situation is, so if things don't pop up soon, I'm bound to fall into chaos.
"Show me a quest!"
Still, the quest window didn't pop up again.
"Haa."
Nothing I can do about it.
Lying on the dorm bed, I took a deep breath and steadied my heart. So what am I supposed to do now? It looks like I'll have to live the academy life I never asked for, and I'm wondering how I'll make it through.
There aren't even any guidelines.
"Will I be able to manage here?"
From what I know, this game's main focus is academy life, but the essence is combat. It's a world where the baseline is fighting tooth and nail against things like monsters, monsterkin, and villains.
If I'm going to live here... fighting is unavoidable. But can I really pick up a sword and fight monsters like that?
I'd rather go back to the military one more time. No. Wait. Cancel that. Maybe my mind is broken; I had an absolutely shitty thought just now.
"Okay."
I survived that hellish extreme military life in the frozen wastes. There's no way a guy like me can't survive in a den full of rookies like this. I believe in myself. Once I start training with the stats I have, I might get stronger.
In the first place, I've entered a game world, so there's no other option. I just have to do as I'm told. That path will probably help more with going home.
"Hoo."
I got up, immediately stripped off my clothes, and headed into the shower.
"Hup...!"
But what's with these injuries! The spots where the Chairwoman pummeled me were bruised! How can someone beat a kid up like this? Showering with rage. I screamed while I washed up, then went and sat down in front of the computer.
First, information gathering.
"Hmm... monsters? Right. Let's look up monsters a bit."
I searched and found a video site similar to YouTube. I went in and searched for monsters, and sure enough, there's a shitton of videos.
I played one.
"Oh."
Honestly, I was impressed.
-Kwooooooaaaar!
-Circle around to the right! I'll handle the front!
The superhumans in the video were facing a giant monster. The monster didn't resemble any creature that's ever existed on Earth. You'd have to call it the kind of monster that only shows up in movies.
"So that thing is real, huh."
A superhuman with a single sword in hand dodged the monster's attacks side to side, drawing its attention, and at the same time, a magical projectile flew in from behind and wrecked the monster's eye.
—Fwoosh!
At the same moment, the superhuman who'd circled to the side climbed right onto the monster and slit its throat... Incredible intensity. It was admirable, honestly.
"Is this what they do after graduation?"
Receiving professional training to fight like that, and then fighting monsters like that.
"A seriously harsh 3D job, huh."
What's the daily rate?
"Oh."
It's mad high.
Well, I guess it makes sense. Superhumans are risking their lives, so how could the daily rate be cheap? Anyway, it was an interesting video. Even though it was just a regular monster-hunting video, it felt like watching a well-made sci-fi action movie.
—Click.
I kept browsing the video site.
"The world sure is convenient."
For someone like me, lacking essential knowledge about this world, every last video spread across this site is basically study material.
Whatever happens, I'll have to live the academy life.
If I think it sucks and just sit still because I don't want to do it, I won't get anywhere. So I have to do it. I have to push through. So, for now, I have to assimilate into this world. Only once that happens will I be able to search for other paths.
"Ah, fuck, I'm so goddamn hungry."
Is delivery a thing?
It is.
I'm tired. I should eat and sleep.
* * *
Obviously, students' right to sleep should be guaranteed. Making kids wake up in the morning is basically a form of abuse. So to resist that abuse, I remember spending my whole school career passed out during morning classes, and looking back, those were the happy times.
"What do you mean, be at school by 8?"
Seriously, give me a break.
Maybe because I was tired yesterday. I barely forced my eyes open, prying them apart, and finally got up. Then I did the usual prep, and the usual whatever, and opened the classroom door to head to my seat, but—
"Huh?"
Some bastard was already sacked out.
And in the seat right behind mine, at that.
If I described his specific posture: he was lying back with both hands cradling the back of his head, both legs propped up on the desk, sleeping like he didn't have a care in the world. He had even put a sleep mask on and was wearing earphones. A seriously perfect sleeping posture, to the point of respect.
But the problem was that the bastard's feet were touching my chair. Goddammit. Wait—this guy's hair is some kind of sky-blue color... moving on. I immediately lifted his sleep mask and said,
"Hey. Move your feet, please."
The bastard's good-looking, huh?
"...?"
He frowned slightly and made a shooing gesture.
What's that supposed to mean, dammit. I said move your feet.
"Hey. I said move your feet, please? These. Your feet. They're touching my chair."
—Tap tap.
When I nudged his legs, only then did the bastard slightly move them. Contrary to his impression, he's a guy you can communicate with. Right. Resolving things with words is the best way.
"Alright."
So I went over and sat in my seat.
But at that moment.
—Wham!
"A shock across my baaaack!!!"
This son of a bitch kicked me in the back!!!
"Why you goddamn fucker! You bastard son of a bitch, you wanna die—"
"Get lost."
"What, you little shit?"
I turned around and the bastard was glaring at me, saying that.
"Get lost."
A voice so cold I could practically feel the killing intent.
Son of a whore, is this prick picking a fight on the first day? Habitually, I checked his name tag. Ryu Cheon-hwi. Ryu Cheon-hwi? That name... he's the top ranker. The bastard who's supposedly in the protagonist's rival position, I think.
Ah! So it's this asshole!
"Get lost."
Like a broken parrot—no, a broken radio—he kept repeating the word 'get lost.' Fuck off with that bullshit. I can't just let a bastard like this walk all over me on the first day.
The moment I thought that.
—Ding.
―――――――――――――――――
「Quest Generated」
「Defeat the hostile cadet」
「Reward : 2,000 Coin」
―――――――――――――――――
2,000 coin?!
There's no choice but to do this! It's already pissing me the hell off, and he dares to pick a fight like this in the morning? Just looking at him, he seems crazy strong—no, since he's actually the protagonist's rival, he's definitely crazy strong!
Even so, I can't avoid this fight and its reward. Even if I don't really know what to use coin for, it never hurts to stockpile it. Plus, a fight between kids at school? Regardless of superhumans and whatnot, there's a way to win.
—Boom!
I immediately stood up. I stood up so aggressively that my chair tipped over. Even so, the bastard just kept glaring at me with a bored expression. Still with his legs up on the desk.
"Take out your earphones."
—Tap tap.
When I tapped his ear and said it, he pulled out his earphones and spoke.
"And you are?"
"Your dad."
"What?"
In an instant, the bastard's eyes widened with disbelief.
"I said I'm your dad. Hey. Check this out."
—Twee.
I immediately plucked a single strand of hair and said, waving it at him.
"I plucked your daddy's ball hair. Long as hell, right? Fwoosh fwoosh."
"Wh-what kind of nonsense..."
"Catch."
—Fwoo!
Just like some Hair Sorcerer, I blew the strand of hair and sent it flying. My hair collided with that dumbfounded face of his.
"You son of a whore, who do you think you're mouthing off to? Tell your daddy to go get lost, you piece of shit. A brat having a damn fit on the first day, you dog bastard. Your daddy dead? Is your daddy dead? Huh?"
The moment I'd mocked him to that point.
"You dare?"
—Sccrrtch.
Only then did the bastard rise from his seat, saying that in a truly menacing voice.
—Shing.
And he drew the sword he was wearing.
Uh.
Huh?
"You drew your sword?"
"You dare? Scum like you?"
"Hey. Wait a sec."
—Step.
The moment he took a step forward, radiating killing intent.
"U-uaaaauuuggghhh! Fuuuuuuccckkk! Somebody saaaave meeeeeeee!"
Th-this crazy son of a bitch actually drew a sword in school!!!!
"There's a superhuman muuuurdererrrr!!!"
I shrieked and bolted to escape the classroom.