Who Is Seoa?
"Water."
"It's not like you had to make clothes and put them on, so why are you this late? Because of you I had to reheat the stew."
The boy grumbled as he set the table.
He took the cold rice for himself, set freshly scooped rice in front of me, and placed the stew close enough for me to reach.
"Want me to fry you another egg? It looks like it's gone a little cold..."
"No, it's fine. I'll just eat it."
"Fine, just eat it. Who told you to stay out until everything got cold?"
The boy grumbled his way back to his seat.
Childhood friend...
So this guy's name was Seoa, was it?
I was pretty sure the goddess had called him that right before she left.
Even the naming conventions are reversed.
This one looked girlish enough that the rejection didn't hit as hard, but if some bandit-built guy with a rough face carried a name like Yerin, it would have been genuinely hard to accept.
Anyway...
Damn, that looks delicious.
He really made all of this by himself?
Gulp...!
The home-cooked spread laid out before my eyes made me swallow hard.
There were side dishes pulled from the fridge too, but the kimchi stew, the fried egg, even the ham battered and fried in egg—
To some people, just everyday home cooking...
Good thing I didn't flip the table...
For someone who had lived through another world and come back to modern times, these dishes were nothing short of heavenly delicacies.
But even with those delicacies right in front of me, I didn't pick up my spoon.
"Why aren't you eating... Is there nothing you can eat?"
No. There was plenty to eat.
If I had my way I would have licked the plate clean like a dog's bowl.
But I couldn't do that.
I needed to keep a certain distance from this childhood friend.
If I ate like I was possessed by a gluttonous spirit, the guy sitting across from me would surely put on a motherly expression and beam with satisfaction.
I didn't know if he would actually look like that, but in every comic and novel I had ever seen, that was exactly how it went.
That could not be allowed to happen.
I had zero intention of getting romantically involved with even one of the three people I was tangled up with.
How exactly was I supposed to date a guy who was chasing after me?
I wasn't some super-gay like that hero bastard.
The moment he confessed I would reject him on the spot.
So to soften the shock a little when that day came, it seemed best to plant the idea that that bastard was always an asshole to begin with.
A man like me...
So considerate.
If I had been a woman, I would have fallen for myself hard...
Ah.
I was a woman right now. Damn it.
I kept forgetting.
Anyway.
It was a good thing there had been no one like me in the other world.
If someone as considerate and good-looking as me had existed over there, I might actually have developed feelings.
But a man like me?
So rare you couldn't find one even in another world—which was exactly why, even after becoming a woman, I had been able to protect my dignity as a man.
Tap tap.
"Seoa."
I tapped the table with my finger and called for Seoa.
He looked at me with eyes that seemed to have grown a size larger.
"Water."
I ordered him to bring me water as if it were the most natural thing in the world.
A patriarchal type who left the water purifier sitting right in front of him and still ordered someone else to pour. He would obviously find it extremely disgusting...
Swoosh...
The instant I finished speaking, Seoa stood up from his seat.
He walked quietly over to the water purifier, took out a cup, and began filling it.
What the hell?
Pour it yourself and drink it.
Don't you have hands and feet?
I had been expecting words like that and a look full of disgust, but Seoa demurely filled the cup and brought it to me.
Clack.
"Anything else you're short on."
"...Nothing."
"Really?"
"...Yes."
I could have complained that the food was bad or that the water wasn't cold enough, but even I was human. It was hard to pile more rudeness onto someone who was kindly putting up with my attitude.
Let's just eat...
I drank the water Seoa had poured and picked up my spoon.
Only when I scooped up a spoonful of rice did Seoa finally lift his own spoon and start eating with me.
Just as I was about to dip my spoon into the kimchi stew—
"But... what kind of person is Seoa?"
"...? Who?"
"I'm asking who Seoa is."
Thud!
Seoa planted his spoon vertically into the rice.
Who's Seoa? Obviously you—
...Ah?
The moment I looked at him wondering what he was talking about, the name tag hanging by his chest caught my eye.
Lee Jia.
Those three characters were written clearly on the name tag on his chest.
My childhood friend's name wasn't Seoa. It was Lee Jia.
I had messed up.
Because of my habit of never remembering guys' names, I had completely misremembered Jia's.
"Seoa... that's a pretty name, isn't it? What kind of kid did you meet that you'd mix them up with me?"
"..."
"Will you tell me?"
Jia said it with a bright, wide smile.
B-breath...
My breath caught in my throat.
"Ah, if it's hard to say, you don't have to. I was just curious."
Jia's eyes curved gently.
It was a kind smile no matter who looked at it, yet this pressure was squeezing my entire body.
Rumble rumble rumble!!!
"Hahahaha! Interesting, Saintess! If you can take even this, then victory is yours!"
It felt worse than the moment I had faced the Demon King's ultimate technique while prepared for mutual destruction.
Bubble bubble...
Is this a hallucination...?
Why?
It wasn't a gas stove, so why did the kimchi stew sitting on the table look like it was boiling?
"Hmm..."
Even though he had said I didn't have to speak, Jia wasn't eating. He just stared holes through my lips.
The light was gradually disappearing from his eyes.
"G-game..."
"Hm?"
"It's a game nickname..."
I didn't even play games, and here I was spouting this game-nickname nonsense.
I could have just said I got the name wrong, but I went and claimed it was a game nickname.
Somehow, though, this felt like the correct answer.
The moment I admitted I had simply gotten the name wrong, I had a gut feeling that something terrifying would happen.
"Game nickname...?"
Jia's aura weakened a notch.
The pressure that had been crushing even my heart vanished.
Thanks to that, my mouth loosened and I hurriedly started making excuses.
"Y-yeah... There's a game I've been playing lately, and I named the character Seoa..."
"That's a pretty human-like name, isn't it?"
"W-we mixed our two names... I took the Seo from Seoyun—my name—and the A from your Jia and combined them into Seoa for the character. I made the nickname while thinking of you, so I must have called it by mistake for a second. Hahaha..."
Finishing the excuse I had concocted by maxing out every last brain cell, I laughed awkwardly.
Fuck... is this even right?
It was humiliating.
Me—the Goddess's Saintess, the first ever to be called the Saintess of Martial Combat.
Even if I had been weakened from fighting the Hero, I had faced the Demon King head-on and won without major injuries.
Even after becoming a woman, I had protected my masculinity to the bitter end against the confession of that self-proclaimed alpha-male Hero.
And now I was folding under the pressure of a man with a woman's mindset and making ugly excuses.
Even King Injo after the humiliation at Samjeondo probably hadn't felt this much shame.
"Aww~ what~! Who just goes and mixes my name into a game nickname without permission! Seriously..."
"Sorry. I'll change it right away."
"It's fine! Why change something you've already decided. Instead, as the price for using my name without asking, you're coming grocery shopping with me today."
"Uh... okay."
Munch munch...
Whether the excuse had landed or not, Jia started eating with a smiling face.
Shit... the rice feels like it's going down my nose...
Korean food I was tasting for the first time in a long while after returning from that world.
The dishes that until moments ago I had felt I could devour like a beast now stuck in my throat with every single swallow.
A pure white space of pure white.
In that place without a roof, massive pillars stood in a row like a temple.
Blue moonlight flowing down from the pillars seemed to stand guard over the sanctuary.
Flash!
Someone appeared in the exact center of those pillars.
What appeared was a cute little girl the size of a small animal.
But unlike her pure-looking exterior, the area around her eyes looked exactly like those of an overworked office worker.
Until the girl appeared, the space had been empty.
Ssssssss...
Suddenly countless snakes crawled out from somewhere and surrounded her.
It was a dangerous situation, yet the girl remained completely nonchalant.
She spoke.
"Mamaaa...?"
"She has stepped out for a moment."
A white snake answered the girl's question as if it were the most natural thing in the world.
Even at the abnormal phenomenon of a snake speaking, the girl continued as if nothing were strange.
"Whooo...?"
"There was a problem in world [1 - 0087 - 0978], so she went herself."
"If Mama went herself, does that mean a Transcendent appeared...?"
"Yes, that is correct."
"Then... she might be lateee..."
I had a favor to ask. This is troublesome...
The girl scratched her head with a hand hidden inside her sleeve, looking troubled.
The snake that read her trouble lit its red eyes and asked,
"I shall assist you."
"I feel like I'll get scolded for working you without permission..."
"Then it will be treated as my independent action."
The snake did not even listen to what the matter was or what the favor entailed.
Without being told a single detail, as if it already knew, it accurately grasped the girl's request and moved.
Watching the snake that had precisely crossed over into that world, the girl opened her mouth.
"Not as much as Mama, but if the snake is watching over, I can rest easyyy..."
She looked down at the floor.
Then, as if a screen had been projected, two people—a man and a woman—eating kimchi stew together amicably(?) were reflected on the floor.
The girl looked with apologetic eyes at the woman who was forcing rice down as if eating through her nose.
"I'm sorry... for arbitrarily twisting your wish..."
That...
No—she knew perfectly well what the wish had been.
The girl... no, the goddess also knew that the harem she had wished for was not a harem in the reverse world.
Unless she was a complete fool, there was no way she wouldn't understand that someone who had been a man would never have wanted that kind of harem.
"..."
Squeeze...
The goddess's small hand curled tightly into a fist.
At the same time, a human's scream rose in her mind.
"Why... why... do I have to keep losing..."
"I don't want any more... just let me die... please! Please..."
"Why do you keep trying to keep me alive! Why!! Hand the Saintess stuff over to someone else and just leave me alone!!"
Thump thump!!
The goddess's heart began to pound roughly.
"If you're not going to leave me alone... if you're going to keep making me do these things..."
"Hup...!!"
At the continuously rising memories, the goddess's breath caught.
The Saintess who had lost all hope, eyes already dead, clasped both hands together.
Seonghyeon, forcing the corners of his mouth up into a smile, spoke earnestly to the goddess.
"Just break me instead. Erase everything so I can't stay sane. Please, at least that much..."
The goddess granted his wish.
She had not granted his real request that seemed to say leave me to die—but she had granted that one.
Until then he had only played the role of healer as the Saintess, yet as if trusting no one, he took up the iron mace that a close friend he could no longer remember had always carried.
And in just three years, with his own power alone, he obtained strength that rivaled the Demon King.
Thud.
The goddess collapsed right onto the floor.
She placed her hand on the projected face of Seonghyeon and stroked it, continuing to apologize.
"I'm sorry... I'm sorry... I'm sorry for breaking you... I'm sorry... sorry..."
To face the Demon King, both the Hero and the Saintess were absolutely necessary.
If she left the Saintess to die, the balance would break, and even with a Hero present there was a high possibility of a future in which the Demon King won.
For personal reasons on top of those reasons, the goddess had no choice but to keep Seonghyeon alive even if he broke.
Twisting his wish and sending him to the reverse world was all an extension of that.
To restore the broken him to his original state, she had to send him there.
"Stella! There, there!"
"D-don't touch my cheeks without permission!"
Recalling Seonghyeon from before he broke, Stella stayed stuck to the floor for a long while.