Femdom Saintess vs Furry-Obsessed Exorcist
The day after eating a hot pot so foul it made the sardine pie I'd once had in England taste like a feast from the gods.
I sat beside the tentacle-obsessed Mudang, clutching my gurgling stomach, looking thoroughly wrecked.
Gurgle. Gurgle. Guuurrrgle...
Whatever Seongha had put in that hot pot last night, my pathetic guts had been sending distress signals ever since. I grabbed my aching belly again and told the Mudang I needed a moment.
"Gonna hit the bathroom. My stomach's really not doing great today."
"Did you eat garbage or something? That body of yours shrugs off most poisons, doesn't it?"
"I ate something that qualifies. So — when does that Saintess get here?"
"About thirty, forty minutes left. Take your time."
"Then I'm really taking my time. Don't worry — I'll be back before she lands."
The second the Mudang gave the green light, I bolted for the restroom, dropped onto the toilet, and emptied whatever was left inside me while cursing under my breath.
"Fuck me, what the hell did he make that hot pot out of? Even decent poison doesn't do this."
He'd used ordinary ingredients, right? Green onions, onions, carrots, meat, soy sauce, salt, sugar — perfectly normal stuff. So how do you turn that into a bioweapon?
"I was actually planning to score some points this time, since he said it was good... but feeding me poison? That's crossing a line."
I was the guy who'd eaten British sardine pie with a straight face and a smile while everyone else gagged and tore it apart. The guy who'd demolished three combat rations in one sitting like they were nothing. And one bite of that hot pot put me on death's door?
Come on. That couldn't be right.
"If it'd just been bad, I could've faked a compliment. But that shit felt like drinking seawater straight out of the Dead Sea."
The way his face crumpled when I said it tasted awful still haunted me. But what was I supposed to do? Even a hellhound crawled up from the underworld had taken one look and gone, Yeah, no, I'm good.
I sighed and shook my head, thinking about his catastrophic cooking skills.
"When we get married, I'm doing the cooking. Seriously, where else are you gonna find a man like me? Muscles optimized for looks, absolute confidence in bed, and domestic on top of it. Damn, even I have to admit — I'm a walking alpha male."
I kept muttering to myself until my wrecked stomach finally settled. Judging I was good enough, I cleaned up and went back out to sit beside the tentacle-loving Mudang again.
"Whew... I might actually live. What's the ETA on the Lily Church Saintess?"
"About ten minutes. Please, please let this go smoothly."
"Yeah? My gut says this one's not going to be smooth either."
"Don't say ominous crap, Raksasa. When you say it, it becomes real."
"What am I supposed to do about having good instincts, huh? Has my legendary intuition ever actually screwed you over?"
"...Well. Once, yeah."
"When?"
"That time I went temporarily sex-crazed and jumped your childhood friend, the fox girl?"
"..."
Right. That had happened.
But for fuck's sake — that was you putting your hands on something I'd already claimed.
Thwack!!!
I drove a knuckle straight into the crown of the tentacle-obsessed Mudang's head and snarled.
"I'm only saying this one more time. You point tentacles at her again and I will personally shove you and your tentacles into purgatory together. Got it?"
"One-on-one pure-love tentacle romance in purgatory... isn't that more of a reward, actually?♡"
"You absolute moron. I'm sending you as a soul. How the hell do you have pure-love tentacle sex as a soul?"
"Ah."
The Mudang let out a short little death rattle, then put on a sly look and tossed me a question.
"So how are things going with the fox girl, anyway? We've got time until the Saintess shows. Spill some tea."
"Why would I tell you? For all I know, you'll hear the story, get obsessed with her again, and start another tentacle pure-love meltdown."
"That time I was literally drenched in aphrodisiacs, okay? I couldn't form a single coherent thought."
"How is that any different from a rapist saying, 'I was drunk, please go easy on me,' you lunatic?"
"I admitted I was wrong! I apologized and compensated her properly! Unlike some rapist trying to weasel out of punishment."
The shameless Mudang kept pestering me for details with zero guilt whatsoever. Fed up, I chopped her on the head again with the edge of my hand.
"Shut up. We don't even know what's going to happen when we meet the Saintess, so why are you running your mouth? I'm ready to go off if I have to — put up proper protective barriers around the area."
"Ow — but does it even matter whether there's a barrier or not? If you go berserk, everything's getting leveled anyway."
"Still better to have one, right? Who knows — maybe a barrier set up in advance takes a little of the edge off the destruction."
Looking thoroughly unimpressed, the tentacle-obsessed Mudang started laying protective barriers all over the airport anyway. I watched an arriving aircraft touch down and began drawing up my yang energy.
By the time the Mudang and I finished prepping to receive the Saintess, a woman who screamed I am a Saintess from every pore finished immigration and walked our way. She seemed to clock us as Underworld people immediately, because she lit up with a bright smile and called out.
"!@#$%^&*"
What the hell is she saying.
I don't speak English, goddamn it.
"The demonic energy I'm sensing is negligible, and there are barely any demons or monsters wandering around. Such a peaceful country, isn't it?"
Inside the descending aircraft, the Saintess murmured as she gazed out at the tranquil scenery. The big-dicked shota incubus answered with a bright smile.
"Seems that way, Master. Though if a place is this peaceful, wouldn't the Underworld people here be pretty weak?"
True to a species built for winning people over, the big-dicked shota incubus led with flattery. The Saintess stroked the incubus's head and spoke softly.
"Fifty-fifty, I'd say. Either everyone's gone soft because it's too peaceful — or they have enough force to keep that peace intact."
Personally, I'm leaning toward the latter.
Swallowing the rest of the thought, the Saintess looked out the window and spotted the man and woman waiting for her on the ground. She issued an order to the incubus at once.
"Shota. This is a command. From this moment, you will find one spirit beast in this country."
"Picking out one specific spirit beast among so many is hard, Master. Please give me more details."
"Hmm... the Goddess said it's a fox spirit beast. Sweep the whole area first and report back. If it looks suppressible, suppress it and bring it to me."
"Of course! I'll go find it right away!"
The shota incubus chirped cheerfully, dissolved into black mist, and vanished. As the plane dropped lower, the Saintess began to sweat under a heat that grew fiercer the closer they got to the ground.
"Just as I thought — the latter. Peace never comes without power. But still... energy this intense..."
She licked her lips, resting a hand on her damp lower abdomen.
"If it's a woman, well, that can't be helped — but if it's a man, that would be perfect. Subduing a male this strong and milking him dry... just thinking about it is making me soaked."
Her body heated with anticipation. She spent a thoroughly enjoyable stretch of time using the plane's rattling landing vibrations as seasoning —
"Haaah... aah♡"
— and by the time the aircraft finished touching down, the Saintess had soaked the seat so thoroughly you could have believed she'd spilled a bottle of water on it.
"Whew... I can finally think again. Having my head flooded with milking-sex fantasies is wonderful, but it's a bit much to carry around at the same time, you know?"
Grinning like someone who'd just had a very satisfying session, the Saintess rose from her seat and began walking slowly toward the two people waiting for her.
One was a brown-haired woman in ordinary clothes who still gave off an unsettling vibe. The other was a bald man radiating pure I am strong energy from every pore.
Confirming that the one carrying that sun-hot power was male, the Saintess started walking with a genuinely happy smile.
How good would it feel to overpower a man with aura that terrifying, break him, and force the milking out of him?
The stronger they are, the more delicious that humiliated face gets when they lose. Someone that powerful — could I even hold back from ravaging him?
Tucking her filth behind a mask of pure innocence, the Saintess waved to the two people who'd come to meet her.
"Hello, Guardians? It seems you've been waiting for me — am I right?"
"You are. Saintess of the Lily Church. We heard you were coming this way, so we came to greet you."
"You didn't really need to... I was only planning to finish the mission the Goddess assigned me and leave this country immediately."
She said it lightly, as if it were nothing. The Mudang carefully asked about her purpose.
"Forgive me, Saintess, but could you tell us more about the contents of that 'mission'? We need to know before we can allow you entry."
"It's a rather awkward matter to share with strangers, I'm afraid. Please understand."
"Understanding has nothing to do with it. If you don't state a clear purpose, you cannot enter. That is the rule here."
The Mudang's voice turned lethal as she deployed the techniques she'd prepared. The Saintess sighed and opened her mouth.
"When in Rome, do as the Romans do... Very well. If that's the law, I suppose I have no choice but to tell you."
Beaming, the Saintess stepped closer to the two wary figures and whispered quietly.
"I only came here to guide one lost little fox to the Goddess. That's all."
The instant the words left her mouth, a fist the size of a pot lid came crashing down on the Saintess.
BOOM!!!!!