Bang, Bang-Bang! (1)

The payoff for gambling everything to wipe out the orc den was nothing short of spectacular.

Eight Orc Laborers.

One hundred eighty times eight — 1,440 experience points slammed into me all at once. Add the bitter fifty from that woman survivor who'd turned zombie, plus the orc that had come hunting her (another 180), and today's haul came out to a staggering 1,650 experience.

In other words...

"System, on...!"

I tapped 1. Your Stats on the system window floating in midair.

Just as the alerts had said — two whole classes leveled up!

A few more zombies tapped out and the Mage level would climb too. And if my theory held, once the average level across all three classes hit three, I'd get a fresh ability point to drop into Strength, Agility, Intelligence, or Charm.

I picked up quite a few weapons, too... and burned through every last one of them.

I dug through the massive bag strapped to my back. Aside from a few items that looked like a woman's belongings and some basic supplies, all that remained were a couple of baseballs and a single short spear. Meaning every orc-made weapon I'd quietly pocketed had dissolved the moment I killed its owner. Monster weapon durability was worse than I'd imagined. Was that by design?

Exactly one orc among the corpses still had an intact weapon — the only one who'd actually been holding his in his own hands. The problem was, if you're going to arm yourself, you ought to lead from the front. Instead the idiot had just strutted around showing off how much smarter he was than his kin for thinking of it. Thanks to that, I'd slit his throat without breaking a sweat.

I was just thinking I might wipe out another eight zombies or so on the way back when a voice reached my ear.

"Um..."

"Hm!?"

I whipped my head toward the sound. The person who'd spoken flinched with a startled gasp and stumbled back a step.

Fortunately, she didn't run. She was one of the survivors the orcs had captured — and luckily, one of the ones who hadn't been violated.

Thank god. A beauty like this shouldn't have had to suffer that kind of horror.

"Th-thank you. For saving us..."

"..."

Ahem... why was my face suddenly burning? This was awkward.

Honestly, her gratitude was only natural. But from my own perspective, the thanks just made me uncomfortable and embarrassed.

Why? Because I'd simply let my body move ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠on instinct.

More precisely, I'd let that damn alignment drag me around by the nose.

I had no idea how many orcs were in that den. Whether an orc hideout even existed where my gut was pointing me was pure guesswork. I'd known full well it was a complete gamble — and still my alignment, Lawful Good, had charged in without a shred of hesitation.

And then I'd found the den and wiped every last one of them out, pushing this body's system potential to its absolute limit.

...Huh. Thinking about it that way, it really was incredible.

Even with all three classes sitting at level two... I'd annihilated eight orcs without taking any serious wounds?

Whoa. I might actually be stupidly strong. I'd figured I'd be a cut above other survivors after checking my stats, but I never imagined I could swat monsters like flies!

"Um, excuse me...!?"

"Ah... ahem. Forgive me."

Oh crap! I'd completely zoned out with a beautiful woman standing right in front of me.

And the price of zoning out was brutal. My lips moved on their own again and fired off that stiff, archaic speech pattern.

And what was the essence driving that formal register? This damn Lawful Good, that's what! This murderous, godforsaken Lawful Good!

"N-no, it's fine. Um... by any chance, are you the one who saved us yesterday...?"

"Yesterday...?"

Yesterday...

Ah — this woman survivor! Looking at her carefully, she did look familiar.

I was sure she'd been standing beside that woman with the glasses. It had been such a fleeting glimpse — I'd been busy running for my life — that I hadn't placed her right away, but staring at her now, it clicked.

To think I'd fled without getting a proper look at a beauty like this... well, given the circumstances, it was understandable!

"You've saved us twice now... thank you so much!"

The woman before me bowed as if speaking for every survivor of this nightmare.

Twitch!

Instinct — no, the alignment — surged. Ah, shit... shit, shit, shit, shit!

Screw it. Do whatever you want!

"Take this."

I unslung the bag from my back and thrust it out. The woman survivor, who had just lifted her head, started to say "Pardon?" — then her eyes went wide.

"Th-this is...!"

"Indeed. Your companion's belongings... the woman with the glasses. Near where I was staying... I found her already dead, only her upper body remaining. All I could do was grant her mercy. My condolences."

"Ahh...! Minjeong... Minjeong... hic... hic...!"

They must have been close friends — the woman before me half-collapsed into sobs. Other women who'd been helping people still reeling from the orcs' abuse in the corner rushed over in alarm to support her. Probably acquaintances of both this beauty and Minjeong.

So her name had been Minjeong. First I'd heard of it.

What? You thought I already knew her name? No, I just heard it for the first time. If you were under the impression I already knew, that's entirely the author's writing problem. A writing problem!

...What the hell did I just think to myself? Forget the random nonsense.

The other women bowed their heads and offered ordinary thanks. But a few of them tossed out some rather strange questions.

"B-by any chance... which survivor group are you staying with?"

"I travel alone."

"I-is that so? W-we... most of us are women, so dangerous situations like today's are bound to keep happening... if you happen to need a place to stay...?"

Th-this was...

Seduction. This was seduction, right!?

The way she lightly brushed her side-swept bangs aside, the coquettish glance, the flush in her cheeks...!

Even if I'd spent all twenty-nine years of my life as a pathetic virgin shut-in, body language and gestures like these were more than enough to read.

Ah — and now that I noticed... it wasn't just the woman in front of me. The other women's eyes had gone strangely intense too. Some of them even looked resentful.

Whoa... was this it? That legendary moment every man is supposed to experience at least once? The moment you become the center of every woman's attention? Peak popularity?

Well, it wasn't hard to understand.

I wasn't an idiot. I was the one who'd just butchered those brutish, powerful-looking orcs — and they really had been strong, given their levels.

So of course the women in front of me, desperate to fend off the terrifying threats outside, wanted to pull someone like me into their circle.

It was blatantly obvious seduction, and yet... wow. For the first time, I was grateful to my alignment.

If I'd been stuck with my usual personality, I absolutely would have gone, "Huh? Oh, I see. Ehehehe..." like a total clown, grinning so hard my philtrum stuck out while awkwardly scratching the back of my head. Because I was a pathetic virgin shut-in, after all.

But this alignment — Lawful Good — was incredible. No, it was genuinely incredible.

Why? Because even in a moment like this, it locked my gaze onto the short-haired beauty sleeping motionless in the corner, the one nobody else was paying the slightest attention to.

"Why is no one taking that woman with them?"

At the question that slipped out unbidden, the woman who'd been laying on the charm so thick startled and followed my line of sight.

"Ah, th-that person...?"

"Yes. Why is no one taking her?"

"Wellll..."

Why trail off like that? Was she somehow a burden to take in?

The answer came from someone else.

"It's because that woman over there doesn't belong to any of our shelters, handsome oppa."

A woman suddenly popped up beside me with the answer. Ah — she was the one who'd been supporting Minjeong's acquaintance, the beauty from earlier. Not knowing her name, that was how I had to file her away.

But... that short-haired woman over there was a seriously staggering beauty. The one who'd been sobbing in front of me earlier was no slouch either, but that one looked like she'd wandered in from an entirely different world.

I'd just cooked up a fairly plausible theory. This world was already completely unhinged, so maybe that woman really was from another world?

"As you know... shelters have limited food and water. We barely have enough mouths to feed as it is — if we add more people, we have to split what little we have even further, right? That's the burden. And more than anything, she's a complete stranger none of us have ever met. So we're just leaving her. ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠She can wake up on her own and go home."

"Hmm..."

Sound logic.

I'd been so busy showing off mutant-level strength that I hadn't registered it, but the other survivors' power wasn't much different from these women's. When a strong monster showed up, male and female survivors alike got steamrolled helplessly. ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠Someone like me — butchering monsters and raiding convenience stores and corner shops like it was a daily habit, stockpiling everything at home — that was the anomaly.

So of course food would be scarce. In a situation like that, if you added another mouth to feed, where would that leave your standing in the group?

In the end, the conclusion was that only someone who wouldn't feel the burden of one more mouth should take her. And in this gathering, the person who fit that condition was...

"Very well. Then..."

I walked over to the woman still lying on the ground, snoring softly.

Whoa, up close... this brown bob was insane. Had a beauty like this even existed in our neighborhood?

No. Not at all. I'd never even heard a rumor of someone this gorgeous living nearby.

Ah, right! She was from another neighborhood! She'd been living somewhere else and gotten kidnapped by the orcs. That had to be it. In which case...

"I'll take her with me."

"W-what?"

"Ah..."

The moment I declared it and scooped the brown-haired woman into my arms, a flicker of disappointment crossed the other women's faces.

Of course they were disappointed. A fighting force that could haul in mountains of food every day and drive off monsters had just picked a third option.

Well... it wasn't that I had zero desire to live surrounded by the affectionate gazes of countless women... but even so, looking after too many people just wasn't my style! That was way too much pressure!

...Huh? The alignment was quiet?

Holy crap! Lawful Good! So you agree with me on this one!

"Divide the contents of that bag among yourselves. I filled it with as much as I could carry from a nearby convenience store. I trust you will distribute it fairly."

"Uh, what?"

What do you mean "what"? You've got a plan, don't you, Lawful Good!

My mouth ran on its own, pointing at the massive bag. Minjeong's acquaintance's companion — the beauty — went blank for a second at those words, then opened the heavy bag she was holding and looked inside.

A moment later, she gasped.

"W-wow... this much... how did you—!?"

"...I was fortunate enough to obtain a high-grade item. Though I transferred ownership to the woman you knew."

That was all the answer I gave before leaving. While everyone else was distracted by the bag, I put one foot in front of the other and walked out of the den.

"Ah, wait a second! At least about Seyeon unnie—"

A voice called something from behind me, but I ignored it.

Honestly, I was too embarrassed to stay any longer. And more than that...

"Hnn, hnnngh..."

Even as a man half-abducted her like some kind of bride-snatcher, this beauty kept right on sleeping — and I was dying to know who she really was.

Hm? Was I free of impure thoughts?

As if.

...Shit. Lawful Good...

April 7th.

Around two in the afternoon.

I checked the time on my phone. I'd revived it using a portable charger from the convenience store.

I stared at the screen for a while — it had been ages — then finally powered it off and lowered my hand.

Haa. A sigh escaped on its own.

I shifted my gaze. Toward the bed in my room, right in front of me.

More precisely, toward the person sleeping soundly on top of it.

A brown bob. A chest with serious volume even under a T-shirt... and a slender waist to match.

A beauty I'd never had so much as a chance of holding hands with in my entire life was asleep on my bed.

Obviously, she was the beauty I'd brought home.

And so I berated myself.

What the hell had I done? I wasn't some dog in heat...

What possessed me to announce in front of all those women that nobody was taking her, then hoist one of them onto my back and carry her home?

What must those people think of me? Didn't they see me as a dog in heat going after women?

...No, wait. Thinking about it, was it really that big a deal? The world had already turned into a lawless wasteland, and I was the one who'd miraculously saved those people from essentially dying.

B-besides... I'd basically solved one of their problems for them. If they'd taken this beauty in themselves, their already scarce food would have gotten even scarcer. I'd wiped that practical headache off the board in one stroke.

Yeah. That was the right way to look at it!

"...Haa."

With a beauty right in front of me, every kind of random thought came pouring out.

I'd forgotten for a long time, but I was reminded once again of my own idiotic personality.

I was the type who got ridiculously nervous around beautiful women. I'd spent so little time getting close to, meeting, or even talking to beauties that I'd completely forgotten.

Whether it was in front of Minjeong's friend earlier, or in front of the beauty currently occupying my bed... I couldn't shake the mental clutter either way.

Anyway... I needed to get a grip. If this woman woke up, I'd have to calmly explain what had happened, right? So from now on, I should think this through carefully—

"Mmm..."

Rustle...!

"Ah..."

Oh, for fuck's sake!

The second I tried to start thinking—!

Right in front of me, a human shape stirred. I froze solid in my mid-deliberation pose.

Slowly, the beauty lying on the bed opened her eyes.

"Ugh, uuugh... what the hell... bed... why does it smell like some old dude..."

This bitch?

The words that came out of that beautiful first impression instantly crumpled my own.