The Burner Account Girl
I trudged up the hill toward the lecture hall, yawning and stretching. Beside me walked Areum and a few other classmates.
"Heuaaam."
"Kkangcheol, you sleepy?"
"Nah, not sleepy. Spring fever, I guess?"
Just then, Ahn Seong-hyeon let out a huge yawn too, then started sneezing. Sniffling, he spoke with an embarrassed look.
"Whoof, spring's definitely here. The pollen allergies keep making me sneeze."
Spring had unmistakably settled in over the past few days. It felt like just the other day I was griping about how the winter dragged on forever, but now wearing a coat was too hot.
That was when I heard a familiar voice.
"Cheol-jin! Cheol-jiiin!"
"Bam sunbae?"
Reddish-brown hair and teal-colored eyes. It was Yu-bam sunbae, the sole exchange student in the Digital Content department.
"Eeng. Cheol-jin, you said you'd call me nuna. Why do you call me sunbae?"
Had I? I awkwardly greeted her again.
"Bam nuna, what brings you here?"
"I knew it! Cheol-jin totally forgot, didn't he?"
"Huh?"
"You said you'd come to the club! But you haven't come! When are you coming?!"
"Ah, right."
I'd completely forgotten. I'd been so busy lately with the group project and going to the gym that it had slipped my mind entirely.
I quickly made an excuse. Pointing at the friends around me who were conveniently nearby.
"Forgot? No way. I felt weird coming alone, so I've been recruiting people around me. These guys here said they'd join the club too."
"What?! All of them?!"
Yu-bam nuna's eyes went so wide they looked ready to tear. A few of the classmates flinched. Some were just people walking by on their way to their next lecture and had nothing to do with us.
"No, just these three. Four including me."
I pushed Seongju hyung, Areum, and Ahn Seong-hyeon forward from behind. Lee Seo-jin and Mi-hyeon nuna, who had originally planned to join with us, ended up joining other clubs while I was dragging my feet.
But Yu-bam nuna seemed plenty happy with just the four of us. Clasping her hands together tightly, Bam nuna beamed.
"Thank you, Cheol-jin! I thought you'd forgotten......."
"Th-there's no way."
She was so overjoyed it pricked at my conscience a little.
"Wait just a moment, everyone. I'll give you something nice!"
Bam nuna rummaged through her bag and pulled something out. Out came pens, Post-it notes, a USB drive, bookmarks, all sorts of things.
"Here, club membership gifts."
"Th-thank you."
We accepted the gifts with dazed expressions. But that wasn't all.
"When everyone comes to the club, we'll have a welcome dinner too. I'll buy Korean beef!"
"Korean beef?!"
"Oh, low-carb, high-protein."
Seongju hyung and Ahn Seong-hyeon were delighted. The fact that the word "beef" made them immediately think "low-carb, high-protein" — these crazy gym rats. Honestly, I had the exact same thought, which made me hate myself a little.
'It's because of the diet.'
I was making that excuse to myself when Bam nuna looked at me with her clear eyes.
"Cheol-jin, you definitely come with your friends. To the club."
"Of-of course. I'll swing by soon. I'm something of an otaku myself."
I really did need to go soon.
*
We arrived at the lecture hall and class soon began. I half-listened, half-ignored the lecture, resting my chin on my hand and staring blankly at the monitor.
'It's been a month since I enrolled now.'
Subjectively, it felt like three months had passed. Probably because so much had happened in just one month. The density of time was completely different from when I was holed up alone in my room corner.
Making friends, which I'd been so worried about, had gone smoothly, and I'd even had physical relationships with two women. Hell, I'd even reunited with my childhood testicle friend — truly, a lot had happened in the span of a single month.
College life rushed by in a blur. And as time flew by like that, midterm season was suddenly right around the corner.
The first exams since entering university. With only three weeks left, the other students were slowly starting to buckle down and study. The atmosphere had shifted, perceptibly or not, starting from that last drinking gathering the week before.
Of course, not everyone was focused on studying. There were still people without a trace of tension, and one of them was me.
'Heuaaam.'
I yawned, careful not to let the professor see. This damn spring fever.
Looking around, I saw everyone busily taking notes while working on their projects. Every so often, I spotted someone struggling to keep up with the pace and asking the person next to them for help.
College lectures were quite different from middle and high school. Subjects like math or science were at least extensions of what we'd learned before, but the other courses were entirely new fields of study.
Because of that, the level of first-year lectures was generally very low. They were literally teaching from the most absolute basics.
Though even that was more than enough to split most students' heads wide open.
At least, it didn't apply to me. The hobbies I'd enjoyed alone in my room corner had unintentionally served as advanced study.
'Boring.......'
For Photoshop and Illustrator, they were starting from what the tools even were, and the 3D modeling and motion graphics hadn't moved beyond the basics either.
Honestly, from where I stood, there was no need to listen to the lectures. Most of the course content was just copying the example projects shown, and I could finish that kind of thing in minutes without even listening to the explanation.
"Cheol-jin, how do you do this?"
"Whoa. Cheol-jin, you're already done?"
"What tool do I use for this part?"
"Ah, that's like this......."
Having finished the work long ago, I spent my time helping my classmates. It had gotten to the point where even the professor asked me to help the others out.
"Could Cheol-jin help out over here?"
"Yep."
Since I had nothing else to do, I wandered around the lecture hall like a half-assistant, half-TA. It was a little annoying, but I figured it'd earn me some points grade-wise.
When I finished helping people and sat back down at my seat, Areum patted me on the back.
"Kkangcheol, you work hard."
"It's not really hard work. Anyway, you're doing pretty well yourself?"
"Heuheung. I may not look it, but I am a virtual streamer. I know the basics, I'll have you know."
"Shh. The others might hear you."
Areum was keeping up with the lectures better than the other students. As she'd said, it was because she was a virtual streamer.
The reason I'd entered the Digital Content department in the first place was to learn virtual-related skills, after all. There was no dedicated virtual major, so I'd come to the closest department available. Areum, who had a lot of interest in virtual stuff, also knew more than the other students.
"Still, if you don't know something, ask."
"You look so busy I'd feel bad asking you too."
"It's fine. In exchange, you let me see your notes for the memorization subjects."
While everyone else struggled with the practical courses, in my case it was the pure memorization subjects that were hard. Hard to memorize, that is — not that the content itself was difficult. It was just that compared to the practical courses I already knew inside out, they were more of a hassle.
Anyway, I fiddled with my phone while occasionally helping people out. There were times I locked eyes with the professor, but she just pretended not to see and let it slide. Probably thanks to my helper role.
'This is nice.'
As long as I wasn't too blatant about it, no one bothered me. University was a place where you were supposed to study on your own, anyway.
So I logged into the SNS 'Trickster' for the first time in a while and checked the piled-up notifications.
- Kkangcheol-nim, why haven't you been posting art lately ㅠㅠ? └ This person posts art every weekend though? └ I know. But originally they uploaded several a day. └ fr. Kkangcheol-nim's hands are insanely fast. Been sparse lately though, probably busy.
- Are you not taking illustration commissions anymore? └ Check the notice, they said they're not taking any for a while. Said they're busy because of university. └ Ah, are they a senior? └ No, I heard they just started. └ ?! Kkangcheol-nim is twenty? Then the art I've been drooling over all this time was drawn by a minor......? └ lol lmao. Don't know about that. Their age isn't public.
There were quite a lot of backed-up notifications. Mostly followers asking me to post art or wanting commissions.
'This person sent more again.'
I glanced around, then cautiously clicked one notification.
[Backside_Of_One]
A famous name on the alt account side of the platform. For reference, we weren't mutuals — they'd unilaterally followed me.
At first, I'd thought this person's nickname meant "the back side of One." But seeing their behavior, it wasn't "back side" — it was "behind."
- Are buttocks one thing or two? I think they're one.
That was the sentence in their bio. So I'd been calling this person "Ass" in my head.
Anyway, I opened it to see what the notification was.
- Why aren't you posting art lately? - One a week isn't enough. Draw some ass art for me. - Hurry up and draw me some juicy, bouncy asses. - Why are you ignoring my messages? Fucking bastard. - Ass ass ass. Ass ass ass ass ass. - (Photo) - (Photo) - Still not looking?
They were sending selfies of their own ass. A bare, pale-white butt, stark naked and exposed in all its glory.
'Crazy bastard. Or wait — crazy bitch?'
The way they talked and acted screamed dude, but the photos were unmistakably a female figure. A slender waistline, a plump, bouncy ass. And even their face, visible above the mask, looked like it was 100% guaranteed to be beautiful.
Though their chest was very small, which made some people suspect they might just be a fit guy with a nice body.
'It does protrude, though.'
It wasn't like there was absolutely nothing there. It was just that the size was comparable to a guy with gynecomastia.
There was one more reason this person was suspected of being a man. It was because, living up to the name 'Backside,' they always only showed their back. Even when they angled things as much as possible, they never went beyond showing their side profile. They absolutely never showed the front. And most of the photos emphasized the ass to begin with.
But I was convinced this person was a woman.
'Definitely a woman. I can tell now.'
In the past, so many people had doubted it that I'd been on the fence, but now that I'd actually been with a woman, it was clear. This person was just a flat-chested woman.
...Now that I thought about it, maybe the other guys had only pretended to suspect she was a man in order to goad her into showing the front. Had I been the only one genuinely suspecting her this whole time?
The moment I realized this weighty fact.
- Oh, you looked! Kkangcheol!
I'd been caught. I should've just checked and closed it, but I'd gotten spellbound by that plump, bouncy ass contrasting with the slender figure.
- (Photo) - (Photo) = Hey Ass, stop sending those before I block you. - So mean. Honestly, you like it. It turns you on, admit it?
It did turn me on. Flat-chested aside, the body itself was nice. Of course, I had no intention of honestly complimenting them.
= Flat-chested, so not really. Ever heard "the bigger the better"? - You son of a bitch. Don't you know a man's cock and a woman's pussy? If the ass is pretty, the pussy's pretty too.
A surprisingly logical reply came back.
'That kinda makes sense?'
Both Areum and Soyeon nuna had pretty asses. And naturally, their other parts were pretty too. Maybe there really was a correlation?
= Just tell me what you want. - Draw some art. One Piece Zoro from behind. Emphasizing the ass.
This crazy fuck? Why the sudden drift like that.
= 凸go fuck yourself凸 - I don't have a dick though. Want me to spread something else?
Something else? Don't tell me.
= Spread it, let's see. - (Photo)
...A photo of an ass in panties came. Well, I mean, this was good too, but.
= I don't draw male characters ㅡㅡ - Can't be helped. Then a female character. = Yeah, not taking it. It's exam season for me ㅅㄱ - No! You talked like you'd draw it! Fuck you! = Never said a single word about drawing it ㅂㅂ
I riled them up like that and was about to close the message window.
- Then a deal? - If you find me, I'll give it to you once.
What the hell kind of nonsense was that? I was so dumbfounded I let out an involuntary laugh.
'She's offering a blank check because she thinks there's no way I'll catch her.'
= What kind of deal is that. How the hell would I find you, you crazy bitch;; - You've seen my ass a lot. No one's seen it as much as you, probably? = What's that got to do with anything. And let's be accurate here. I didn't look at it — you shoved it at me. - Same difference. Anyway, if you've seen my ass that much, shouldn't you be able to recognize it at a glance? = You're fucking impossible to talk to. How would I know if I ran into you when there's no chance we'd ever cross paths in the first place? And it's not even certain that the photos you've posted so far are actually you.
This was logical annihilation. After explaining it this thoroughly, they'd get it and give up, right?
But what was this?
- Are you saying I've been posting someone else's ass all this time? = Not exactly that, more like it's possible. - The fuck?
This person was seriously pissed off. What was the big deal?
The messages went quiet for a moment.
Then, around when the lecture ended, another message came.
- (Photo)
It looked like it was taken in a bathroom — a toilet was visible. The contents were, naturally, ass.
But there was something different from before. On that pale ass, a Post-it note was stuck, with the nickname 'Backside_Of_One' and the words 'find me and I'll let you have me' written on it.
- You believe me now? It's my ass. - Wanna fuck it like crazy, don't you?
A barrage of messages poured in, but my mind was elsewhere. I stared intently at the Post-it note stuck on that ass. In the corner of the Post-it, I saw a familiar pattern.
'This is definitely.......'
It was exactly the same as the Post-it note Yu-bam nuna had given me that morning. A Post-it printed with the club logo.
= Do you go to Cheonggwang University?
The messages from the person who'd been bombarding me came to a halt. A moment later.
- No?
= Toons.
- [Typing a message.]
They wrote something and erased it, over and over — no message came for a long time. And the excuse they finally managed to come up with was.
- lmao, you're saying that because of the Post-it note, right? A friend gave it to me.
I was certain now. This person was from our school. Hell, they were in the same club as me.
= You're dead now. Get ready to get pounded.