My Sister's Love Is Too Heavy
My Sister's Love Is Too Heavy
Seo-yeon went quiet for a while.
Was it shock, or disgust? Or maybe—
"You really do love your brother devotedly."
That was the answer Seo-yeon barely managed to get out.
Her tone was odd.
She could have just said the siblings got along well, but it sounded like she was drawing a line, as if this was all Aria's one-sided love.
"Yes. I love him more than anyone in this world."
Aria answered without a flicker of expression.
Honestly, at that moment, Aria scared me more than the stone-faced Seo-yeon did.
She had always been quick on the uptake and good at reading and probing people's emotions. Until now, though, the person she had been reading was me—someone she cared about—so it had not stood out much.
Seo-yeon should have been used to hiding her emotions and managing her expression from her upper-class life, yet Aria had stripped that mask off in one go.
"Ha."
"Oh my, was there something wrong with what I said?"
"I was rude. It's not that there's a problem, but I couldn't help thinking it's a bit excessive for love directed at a brother."
"Hehe, no matter how excessive others might find it, to me it always feels insufficient."
Just watching this was suffocating. I was about to step in when Aria clung to my right arm as if hanging off it and spoke.
"Or perhaps, are you jealous?"
At those words, the corners of Seo-yeon's eyes shot up sharply. With her mouth shut like that, her gaze alone could kill.
But Aria added calmly, even under that glare.
"Ah, I'm sorry. You said my brother was just an upperclassman to you, right? Then you must not have any feelings for him."
"...Of course not. In the first place—and I apologize to you, Aria, as his younger sister—but a man like Si-hyeon isn't my type. Even if someone delivered a whole truckload of him, I'd refuse."
"Oh? Did you take that as a matter between a man and a woman? I meant it as asking whether you were jealous of us siblings getting along."
Aria giggled.
But Seo-yeon fired back without backing down.
"I suppose my phrasing caused a misunderstanding. It is about siblings. Having a man like that as my brother—no thank you."
Seo-yeon glared at me.
Even someone as dense as me could tell by now.
That emotion was clearly directed at me.
I didn't know the exact feeling or the cause, but that much was certain.
"Hey, Han Seo-yeon."
"We're not close enough for you to call me that casually, Si-hyeon."
Seo-yeon replied icily. Whether she liked it or not, I had to say what needed saying.
"Stop playing word games. What's the problem? We talked just fine until last time."
"There's no need for you to concern yourself. It's been like this all along, hasn't it?"
There was a barb in Seo-yeon's words.
Did "it's been like this all along" come from the fact that we hadn't contacted each other until we reunited?
Just as I was about to answer, Seo-yeon spoke first.
"We've already arrived. I have my next lecture, so I'll be going."
When I turned my head, the massive chapel building stood before us. I'd been so focused on the two of them that I only now noticed we'd arrived.
Seo-yeon walked off without looking back.
My body moved on its own, grabbing her wrist.
"What are you doing, Si-hyeon? I don't think we have anything else to talk about."
Seo-yeon snapped coldly. I'd grabbed her reflexively, so I was momentarily at a loss for words, but at the very least, I felt like I couldn't let it end like this.
"The birthday."
"What?"
"I'll go. On Mom's birthday."
As if she hadn't expected that answer, Seo-yeon's mouth opened and closed several times, swallowing back whatever she'd been about to say.
Then she let out a deep sigh, composed herself again, and spoke to me.
"Hoo. Fine. A promise is a promise. I'll let Hancheon Hotel know, so you can just give your name at the front desk. Then I'll really be going, Si-hyeon."
"Yeah, see you then."
Only then did I release Seo-yeon's wrist, and she left without lingering.
Was it just my imagination that her last words felt a bit softer?
"Let's go in, Aria."
"Yes, Brother."
Even after that war of nerves with Seo-yeon, Aria's expression was serene.
I pushed open the heavy chapel door. Since we'd notified them in advance that we'd be using it, the chapel door was unlocked.
"Wow..."
The exclamation slipped out. I'd been here a few times before, but the space was overwhelming every time.
Countless chairs lined both sides, and the stained glass shone brilliantly in five colors under the sunlight.
And beyond that, on the dais, stood a castle of massive pipes, with a throne for the performer at its center.
"To think a place like this has barely been used until now—it really is a waste."
"Indeed. Though from my perspective, it's a good thing."
I glanced at my watch. About thirty minutes left until my lecture.
The chapel was on the far outskirts of the campus, so getting to the lecture hall would take some time, but if I ran, I could probably make it in under ten minutes.
"If it's all right, could I listen to you play for a bit before I go? If it runs long, I might have to leave in the middle."
"Of course. Now that I think about it, this is the first time I've played the organ for you, Brother."
Aria climbed onto the dais with familiar movements and sat on the long bench. I was about to sit in one of the front-row seats when Aria tapped the spot beside her on the bench lightly, calling me over.
"Brother, how about listening from here instead of there?"
"Are you sure? I feel like I'd get in the way of your playing."
"Not at all. And if you slipped away without a word while I was focused on playing, I'd feel a bit lonely. If you sit here, at least I'll know when you leave, so please stay by my side."
Aria spoke with a faint blush, as though embarrassed by how clingy she was being.
She had a point—if she'd been mid-performance, I couldn't have interrupted, so I probably would have quietly left the chapel.
"Then I'll do that. I was curious how organ playing works anyway."
As the brother of a genius younger sister, it was a bit embarrassing, but I was quite ignorant when it came to classical music.
If I'd ever gone to one of Aria's competitions, maybe it'd be different, but while spending so much time alone, it hadn't been easy to find time to travel to Germany or Austria, and above all, back then Aria had refused to meet or talk with me.
'At first, it was a real shock.'
Back then, I'd thought Aria had hit puberty and come to dislike me. I remembered consulting Linnea about it, and she'd told me that Aria had said it was because she was afraid her resolve would dull.
Now that Aria expressed her love for me without reservation, I thought I could understand.
She must have been afraid that hearing my voice would make her want to come back to Korea.
While I was lost in thought, Aria fumbled beneath the keyboard. Then, with a click of a switch, a low hum of vibration sounded from the pipes.
Next, Aria adjusted the knobs beside the keyboard this way and that, then let out a soft breath.
"Well then, I'll begin."
Slender fingers that looked like they might snap at the slightest pressure danced gracefully across the four-tier keyboard.
Her pale, slender legs moved just as freely across the organ's many pedals, as though dancing out steps.
At first, I was inwardly nervous. Given the size of the instrument, I'd naturally worried that a tremendous roar would slam into my eardrums.
But that worry was unfounded.
A gentle melody unfolding through leisurely dance-like movements filled the chapel that held just the two of us.
Every time Aria pressed a pedal, a low vibration traveled through the pipes and resonated through the bench we sat on.
That melody was one even I, nearly a complete layman when it came to classical music, knew well.
Air on the G String.
From what I'd heard somewhere, a version arranged to be played using only the violin's G string had become so famous that even Bach's original came to be called Air on the G String.
The vibration filling the chapel now was far from the sharp sound of a violin. The majestic yet warm vibration made the melody something I could feel through touch as well.
It was a strange sensation.
And at the same time, it was surprising.
The fact that I, who'd never had much interest in classical music, was appreciating this music as if spellbound.
Was this a characteristic of the organ as an instrument, or was it thanks to Aria's genius?
"——Ah."
When I came to my senses, the performance had already ended.
The light filtering through the stained glass shone on Aria like a halo. She looked like an angel descended to earth.
An ephemerality and beauty that seemed like it couldn't exist in this world, a halo that even looked like wings.
As if the visual information had finally reached my brain, only then did I realize I'd been looking at Aria the entire time from the start.
Aria looked my way and smiled faintly.
"How was it, Brother?"
For a moment, I was at a loss for words.
With my meager knowledge and vocabulary, I didn't think I could properly express what I'd felt listening to that performance.
But I couldn't just stay silent when Aria wanted my impressions, so after racking my brain for a long while, I answered.
"It was fantastic. So much so that it felt completely different from the Air on the G String I know. The performance felt like it passed in an instant. Sorry, my vocabulary's poor and my knowledge of classical music is shallow, so I can't express it properly."
"Hehe."
Hearing that, Aria leaned her head against my shoulder. I caught a scent—was it shampoo, or some sweet floral fragrance?
"More than any long-winded critique I've ever received, what you just said made me happier, Brother. It made me feel that the time I spent apart from you wasn't in vain."
"Don't say something so foolish. With everything you've achieved, how could that time possibly have been in vain?"
I lightly chided her.
Aria had already swept countless competitions and was even being called the greatest organist of this century.
Those six years that had made Aria who she was could not possibly have been in vain—
"Because to me, more than the fame I've built, more than the world's acclaim, a single word from you is far more precious, Brother."
Hearing that, I swallowed my breath for a moment.
I'd long been aware that my younger sister's love was heavy, but this was far beyond what I'd expected.
"So that means, for my sake, you'd be willing to throw away everything you've built up until now?"
"Yes."
Aria answered immediately.
Without a moment's hesitation.
Asking "why" was meaningless.
If Aria loved me this much, then asking why was pointless.
So I asked a different question.
"How did you end up falling for me?"
Hearing that, Aria smiled a slightly lonely smile, then—
"As I thought, you don't remember. Or perhaps you simply weren't aware of it. Though that's exactly why I came to like you even more, Brother."
She left me with those hard-to-understand words.
"What is it that I don't remember?"
"I'll tell you the rest on the way back. You need to head to your lecture soon, don't you, Brother?"
At Aria's words, I checked the time. There was still some leeway, but it was certainly not enough time for a serious conversation.
"I'll contact you after my lecture."
"Yes, I'll be here practicing and waiting."
Fortunately, today's lectures were all in the morning.
I gave Aria's head a light pat and left the chapel.
* * *
"Hey, what's with you today?"
After the lecture, Woo-jin tapped my shoulder and asked.
"What do you mean?"
"Look at your notes."
As Woo-jin said, I looked at my notes. Swirling black lines densely covered the page in scribbles.
"A guy who normally takes diligent notes is doing this all through lecture—how could I not be worried?"
"Just had some things on my mind. Lend me your notes later."
"That's not hard. But seriously, is something going on? There's a rumor going around Everytime that you're hanging around with girls, so don't tell me..."
"Would I do that?"
"Fair enough."
It wasn't hard to imagine how the rumor started.
The school's top heiress, and Aria, whose looks alone were unrealistically beautiful. With me in between them, of course rumors would spread.
But I had no intention of going around explaining myself. Throw fuel on a false rumor and it only burns hotter, and I hadn't done anything to feel guilty about anyway.
"I'm heading off first."
"Lucky bastard. I've got a full day of classes. Get home safe."
I parted ways with Woo-jin and headed to the chapel.
Once again, I felt grateful that the chapel was in a secluded corner where people rarely came.
If anyone else had seen that scene this morning, even worse rumors would have spread.
I opened the chapel's thick door.
Inside, the angel who had descended to earth was still playing heavenly music.
Without disturbing the performance, I quietly sat in the front-row seat.
This time it was a piece I did not know, but the melody still had a captivating beauty.
The piece ended on a low, mournful melody.
Clap, clap—I applauded.
"You're here, Brother."
"You're not surprised. I came in quietly half-intending to startle you."
"Hehe. And the other half is that you didn't want to disturb my playing, right? Just what I'd expect from my kind brother."
She was right. Completely right.
The reason I'd come to the chapel first without contacting her was because I'd worried an alarm sound might interrupt her practice.
"If you want to practice more, go ahead. Listening to you play is enjoyable."
"No. I'll end today's practice here. It's not because you're waiting, Brother. Even when I was abroad, I wasn't the type to practice all that much."
With that, Aria tidied up skillfully and came down from the dais.
"Would it be all right if we walked back? While I give you the answer you wanted to hear, there's a place I'd like to show you, Brother."
"Sure."
Aria naturally took my hand.
I wondered if it was a bit embarrassing for grown siblings to hold hands, but from the time we left the chapel, crossed the university grounds, and walked the streets, no one looked at us strangely.
Well, we probably didn't look like grown siblings in the first place.
One of us was obviously Korean, while the other was a beautiful girl with silver hair and blue eyes.
On top of that, Aria was on the shorter side, so the height difference was considerable. Even granting that we might look like siblings, the age gap would seem significant.
Aria was quiet the whole way back.
The route back was also subtly different from the way home.
But I didn't bother commenting on it.
She'd said there was something she wanted to show me, and she'd promised to tell me on the way back, so I just waited.
And finally, Aria's steps came to a stop.
"I'm glad. It's still here, just as it was. This is the place, Brother."
It was a park.
There was nothing particularly special about it. The only two notable things were the old, worn-out playground equipment, such as the swings, and the fact that no one was around, probably because the park was tucked away in such a secluded spot.
"Sorry. Did something happen here?"
"There's no need to apologize. It may be a place that left a deep impression on me, but for you at the time, Brother, it's only natural that it didn't stay in your memory."
Aria said that as she led me by the hand toward the swings.
Then she sat me down on a swing and sat on my lap.
"It's dangerous to sit on a swing like this."
The swing wasn't moving, but I instinctively wrapped one arm around Aria.
For some reason, I felt a sense of déjà vu. As if this had happened before.
Held against me like that, Aria turned to look back, her face red all the way to her ears, and whispered.
"As I thought, you haven't changed at all, Brother. You held me like this back then, too."
A hazy memory slowly sharpened.
A corner of my memory, from a time when both Aria and I were still young.
"It was the day you disappeared."
The words slipped out before I knew it.
"That's correct, Brother."
Aria answered, her face flushed red.