A Bigger Mistake Than Expected...
Gachi's Side.
An unexpected conversation with Senior Je-cheol.
Honestly, it had been sudden and more than a little uncomfortable. But it had meant something.
It let me move forward with what I had planned that much faster.
“...I should just call.”
...Hoo. I was a little nervous. But I needed to calm down quickly.
“Ah, Professor Yu Eun-yeong? Hello... This is Go Gachi. If it’s not too much of an imposition... No, it definitely will be an imposition, but may I ask you something? ...Yes, it’s for Wa Sol noona.”
From now on... I had to become the bad guy.
After the call with Professor Yu Eun-yeong, I had gained more than I expected, and I headed for a nearby café.
My place was close to campus, but with only about an hour left it felt pointless to go home.
More than anything... there was someone I needed to meet.
“He should be here any minute...”
I had gotten the number from Professor Yu Eun-yeong, so contacting him had been easy, and the moment he heard me ask to meet, “that person” had agreed without hesitation.
The fact that he agreed so readily left a sour taste, but whatever.
It didn’t matter.
He was about to become someone who no longer mattered.
“Oh, you were already here?”
“Yes. You got here surprisingly fast too, Senior.”
Unlike last time, I was no longer emotional, so I went back to speaking formally with him. However I treated him no longer meant anything, so I could do as I pleased.
“Surprisingly? Don’t tell me you thought I’d be late?”
“That is the impression I had, yes.”
“Haha, I may look like this, but I’ve always lived diligently.”
He did look like that, but at least he kept his appointments better than expected.
“Then... Senior Ju-hyeon. Please have a seat. I didn’t know what you’d like, so I ordered an Americano.”
“Thanks~”
Senior Ju-hyeon sat across from me and took a sip of the Americano. Watching him, I could tell he wasn’t taking this situation seriously at all.
The boyfriend of the woman he insisted was his ex-girlfriend had called him out, and he was acting as if nothing were wrong.
Clearly... this man had zero interest in me.
“Still tastes good. You bought this with my money too, right?”
See? Starting with nonsense right from the beginning.
“I’ve never taken a single won of your money, Senior.”
“Ah, right. You were the top scholarship student. Shame~”
“I should call that fortunate. Money itself isn’t a sin, but I don’t particularly want to accept money that stinks.”
“I’ve never done anything illegal.”
“I meant the person giving it stinks.”
“Haha, I shower every day and even put on cologne~”
He brushed it off easily again. I understood.
From now on I was going to thoroughly ignore whatever feelings this man might have, too.
“But how’d you even get my number? Did Wa Sol give it to you?”
“Noona doesn’t even know your number, Senior.”
“True. An ex’s number is the first thing you’d delete. She deleted the fact itself, after all.”
If I had heard that the first time we met, I would have gotten pretty emotional.
But now I could just let it slide. It was a meaningless conversation anyway.
“Why are you so certain she deleted it? Is it because you’ve already been dumped by someone you loved?”
“...Huh?”
A man who usually answered inconvenient remarks with something completely off-topic couldn’t brush this one aside so easily.
This... was confirmation, then.
“Ah, you mean Wa Sol? Well, rather than being dumped—”
“I never said a single word about noona. Why do you assume it’s her?”
I cut off Senior Ju-hyeon’s attempt to bring up Wa Sol noona again. The conversation we needed to have right now had nothing to do with her.
“Because you’re her current boyfriend. I figured it might make you uncomfortable.”
“No, it doesn’t make me uncomfortable anymore. It’s obvious you approached her for a completely different purpose, so there’s no need for that, is there?”
“...What do you mean?”
His tone dropped a little. He was still smiling, but it meant he couldn’t just let this pass.
Of course, I could easily let that attitude pass.
“Someone once told me that the things you can’t easily brush off are the things you care about. Conversely, if you don’t care at all, you can brush them off without a second thought.”
“...I’ve heard that a lot.”
“Yes. It’s something the person who dumped you said.”
Thud.
Senior Ju-hyeon set his coffee cup down rather hard.
His mouth was smiling, but his eyes were not.
“You’ll break the cup like that. Be careful. It’d be a waste of a good cup.”
“Normally wouldn’t you worry about the person holding the cup?”
“Because I have no interest in that person.”
In contrast, I set my own cup down gently.
This café was one I had come to with Wa Sol noona before.
Yarrow Café.
The lesser-known flower language of that bloom was... battle.
“Ah, and you asked how I got your number, right? I called Professor Yu Eun-yeong and she gave it to me right away. She didn’t even ask why. You must be quite trusted. Even though I’m just a freshman who’s known her less than a month.”
I was simply grateful, of course.
Even I was surprised at how much my tone had turned into pure teasing.
So this was how emotional you could get with someone you didn’t care about. No need to hold back; I could just say whatever came to mind.
Using him as an emotional trash can didn’t even leave a shred of guilt.
“Ah, you were pretty close with Professor Yu Eun-yeong, weren’t you?”
“We’re still close, though?”
“Ehh, I don’t think so.”
Huh. Maybe it was because I’d been watching Kiri’s streams lately in addition to Eve’s.
I had unconsciously copied Kiri’s way of speaking.
“But you know, there’s something I’m curious about.”
“...What?”
“I heard there’s a ring on Professor Yu Eun-yeong’s desk. Do you know about it?”
“...”
“From what Wa Sol noona said... it seems to have disappeared at some point.”
“...”
“You really like coffee, don’t you. Not answering, just drinking.”
“Yeah. It’s even better because it was bought by someone precious to someone precious to me.”
“I’m not that close to Professor Yu Eun-yeong yet.”
Thud.
Ah, he did it again. I told him the cup would break. Then I’d have to pay the café for it.
“I never said a single word about Professor Yu Eun-yeong.”
Just now... no, the exact line Wa Sol and I had used on Senior Ju-hyeon at least once before.
To hear it from the man himself. Maybe he understood a little of how we felt.
“Wasn’t it? Didn’t know.”
“What. Was this what you wanted to say? You really wanted to get under my skin, huh.”
“I just wanted to pay back what I received.”
Especially when that debt had been received from a much more senior upperclassman.
“Then we’re done. You’ve done an excellent job of ruining my mood. I’ll be going. Ah, the coffee... I’ll just cover it.”
“Because you turn away from everything that’s inconvenient or that you don’t want to hear. Isn’t that why you got dumped?”
I spoke as if telling him to wait, to Senior Ju-hyeon who was about to stand.
Dumped.
What a vicious word. Saying something like that was basically digging into the wounds of someone involved.
Ah, but it was fine for him.
Because I had no interest in him.
“But you know. I’m curious about something too. How does Gachi know all this and keep saying these things?”
“I don’t know anything. I just feel it.”
Sometimes it was like that.
Not something I thought through with my head. Moments when I simply sensed it.
A recent example... the way Wa Sol noona had suddenly come to mind when Kiri collapsed.
It wasn’t always correct, but more often than not I found an answer that was nearly right.
And looking at this man’s reaction now... this time it might be the correct answer.
“Wa Sol noona... I heard Professor Yu Eun-yeong was quite fond of her. Conversely, I heard you gradually grew distant from the professor.”
“And who told you that?”
“I just guessed this one, but it looks like I was right.”
What had only been a hunch lined up perfectly.
The moment a tentative assumption turned into certainty.
“Did you think that getting closer to Wa Sol noona would also get you closer to Professor Yu Eun-yeong?”
“What are you talking about. I don’t understand a word.”
“I don’t understand either. The only people who could understand you are probably... family, maybe? I don’t even know who your family is, and I’ve never met them.”
“...!”
Huh? An unexpectedly intense reaction.
Senior Ju-hyeon’s eyes went wide and he was now openly glaring at me—something I hadn’t anticipated. Where had I scratched him?
“...You’re saying all this knowing everything, aren’t you?”
“It was only a guess until now.”
“...You really... know how to dig in.”
“Maybe I should nickname myself ‘Back Scratcher.’ Ah, buy one for Professor Yu Eun-yeong. She seems to need it.”
She was always scratching the back of her neck.
She would definitely put a good back scratcher to use.
“Why don’t you scratch it for her?”
“Ehh, how could I. If anyone should, it would be you, Senior... Ah, but that’s impossible now, isn’t it.”
“...”
Senior Ju-hyeon hung his head and scratched the back of his own neck.
Even that habit was something he had picked up from the person he loved. He could have at least copied the good parts.
Pleasant unpleasantness. Unpleasant pleasantness.
Really... looking at it now, the two of them were complete opposites.
“Hey. So what is it you actually want to say?”
“Ah, right. I never got to the main point.”
True. I had been having so much fun scratching at him that I forgot.
Well, thanks to that I had completely vented every emotion that had built up. It had been a meaningful stretch of time.
“Actually, I asked Professor Yu Eun-yeong what she thought of you. I wanted to tell you her answer.”
“...Do you have to?”
“Yes. I specifically wanted to say it to your face.”
“...”
“Even if you say you don’t want to hear it, it doesn’t matter. I’m going to say it anyway. Besides... you’re going to listen, aren’t you?”
As if proving my words for me, Senior Ju-hyeon didn’t leave his seat.
Looking at him like this, he really was a simple man. No need to beat around the bush with someone like that.
“She said she hopes you’ll live well on your own from now on. Really kind words, right? Even now, the way she still cares about you is nice to see.”
This was the end.
To this man, Wa Sol noona had only ever been a means to approach Professor Yu Eun-yeong.
The person he had been interested in from beginning to end was Professor Yu Eun-yeong. Otherwise he would never have brushed off noona’s words so casually.
“No matter how much you approach Wa Sol noona now, from that side you’re someone who needs to be kept at a distance from Professor Yu Eun-yeong. So... take it easy and graduate already. From university, and from everyone connected to it.”
Student and disciple. An age gap of at least twenty years. Even so, the way he loved was something I could respect.
But once the other party had rejected him this clearly, it was time to step back.
“...”
Senior Ju-hyeon said nothing and stood. The leisure and the unpleasant pretense were gone from him now.
Like that, he quietly left the café.
...
..
.
Only after confirming he was gone did I draw in a deep breath.
“Hooah...”
Really. Doing something so unlike me... This was the first time I had ever torn into someone to their face, and only now did I feel the weight lift from my chest.
I had kept brainwashing myself to hold out to the end, but I had been reaching my limit.
“Still, I probably won’t have to see him again.”
“Yeah, probably not.”
“!?”
I almost spat out my coffee.
I never thought I’d run into her here...
“How long have you been here?”
“The whole time.”
“Wow...”
“You were talking pretty freely, weren’t you?”
“Th-that... I’m sorry, Professor Yu Eun-yeong.”
I bowed my head to the suddenly appeared Professor Yu Eun-yeong.
Whatever the reason, I had used her, and that was a fact.
Professor Yu Eun-yeong scratched the back of her neck, sat in the seat Senior Ju-hyeon had vacated, and finished the coffee he had left behind.
“Well, not a single thing you said was wrong. I’m actually grateful. That kid might finally come to his senses.”
“...I said it myself, so this is weird coming from me, but... aren’t you worried?”
“He said it himself, didn’t he. He may look like that, but he’s a diligent kid. He’ll do what he needs to.”
“Yes...”
“Originally I should have been the one to say it. I’m only sorry toward you.”
“No. It was for my own sake as well.”
It hadn’t particularly been for Professor Yu Eun-yeong. It had been so that man would never again enter my or Wa Sol noona’s field of vision in the future.
“Still, thank you. I didn’t have the courage or the right to say those words.”
So Professor Yu Eun-yeong had also cherished him to some degree. I couldn’t fully understand that feeling, but...
“He’s a graduate now, after all. That’s the only reason I could say everything I wanted.”
“Right... Now that the kid has graduated, he needs to graduate from me too.”
Professor Yu Eun-yeong set the coffee cup Senior Ju-hyeon had been using at an angle on the table and began rolling it clockwise. A meaningless action... probably one of the things she did whenever she was troubled.
“You really did want that senior to leave you, Professor.”
It was a statement without much weight. Just me restating what she had said in the way I felt it.
The answer Professor Yu Eun-yeong gave to that... was far more shocking.
“Yeah. From a mother like me... who never even managed to act like a proper mother. Someone who gave up custody right after the divorce has nothing left she can say to that child... Haa, the coffee was good. See you in class tomorrow.”
Hearing those words, I maintained the absolute best poker face of my entire life and simply greeted Professor Yu Eun-yeong.
“Yes. Take care on your way.”
“Alright...”
With a bitter expression she gave a short reply and left the café.
I took a sip of coffee and tried to steady my trembling hands, but they wouldn’t calm as easily as I hoped.
Of course they wouldn’t—she had just casually dropped a bombshell on me and walked out.
...Who was a mother? She gave up custody? What was this...
Professor Yu Eun-yeong had spoken so naturally that she must have assumed I already knew.
But to me every single word was brand new!?
I had only guessed that the two of them had “that kind of relationship.” I never imagined it was a mother-and-son relationship... And on top of that she had divorced and given up custody... Wait a second.
Then everything I had just said to Senior Ju-hyeon...
...
..
.
I had definitely set out to become the bad guy. But...
I hadn’t wanted to become this much of a bad guy!?
Yu Eun-yeong's Side.
The day my son came to campus to donate his scholarship. Still unaware that he was coming, I had an overdue one-on-one conversation with Wa Sol, who had arrived early.
“You’ve got yourself quite the cheerful boyfriend, I hear?”
“Ah, already found out?”
“Rumors about you spread fast. Same as last time.”
“...True.”
Damn, I slipped up.
This was because of that Ju-hyeon kid... I had spoken far too carelessly.
“Haa, that senior is really... Now that I’m saying it, it was way too obvious. He never had the slightest interest in me. Yet he only ever showed that fake attitude, so of course it was uncomfortable.”
Huh? Her reaction was lighter than I expected.
“Honestly I still hate that person. If I ran into him right now I think I’d get a little angry.”
“Ah, r-really? Still, listening to you, it sounds like you’ve overcome a fair amount?”
“...Of course I overcame it. It’s already been years. But if possible I don’t want to meet him. Besides... I still haven’t told Gachi about the rumor that I dated him. Even if we unfortunately run into each other, I’d rather it happen after I’ve already told Gachi about it.”
...Was this really the Wa Sol I knew?
The Wa Sol who used to look like she would break at a touch, who couldn’t properly express her own opinions, was voicing her complaints like this.
“You’ve changed a lot... I knew you’d gotten brighter, but I never thought it would be this much.”
“A lot of things happened in the meantime. Well, some of it is thanks to my current boyfriend too... Hehe.”
Saying that and smiling shyly, Wa Sol looked pretty enough that I wanted to give her an A just for the smile alone.
If only I had a daughter like this...
“Then it wouldn’t be a problem if you saw that kid right now?”
“Ugh. I just told you. I don’t want to see him. And if I imagine him going to Gachi and saying weird things the way he did to me... that makes me a little uneasy.”
True, that kid was more than capable of it. Especially once he learned Gachi was dating Wa Sol... he would be even worse.
By the way, Wa Sol’s boyfriend was about to come receive his scholarship, and this girl...
“Just in case, let me ask. Nothing you’re anxious about regarding the exams?”
“...Ah, class is starting. I’ll head in~”
Blatantly playing dumb and making a quick exit. Why was it that even after seeing her growth, I still couldn’t picture Wa Sol getting anything above a B this year either.
What was she even planning to do after graduation...
“Well, she’ll manage somehow. Now.”
I watched Wa Sol’s retreating back with a slightly lighter heart.
I had wanted to help, but I couldn’t, so I was sorry. As a mother who had abandoned her son... I had no right to say anything to that son.
So I had wanted to be even a small support for her... Who would have thought that would only provoke the kid further. Maybe the biggest mistake I ever made... was trying to stay by Wa Sol’s side.
“I’m sorry, Wa Sol. As a mother, and as an educator... I guess I’m a failure.”
A mother who gave up her son. An educator who neglected her student.
I would have to carry this guilt for the rest of my life. That, at least, would be a form of atonement.
Still... if there was one fortunate thing, it was that one of them was now living in the present. She had taken a step out of her painful past and could walk forward together with someone precious.
Looking at that Wa Sol, I couldn’t help... selfishly wishing for the same.
Please, let my son also completely free himself from the past the way Wa Sol has.
Let him completely graduate from a mother who was never much of a mother at all...