After Our Relationship Came to Light
The class ended without me managing to focus properly at all. In the end, I asked Hae-an for help.
“Could you... show me your notes for a bit?”
“Haa, I had a feeling it’d be like that.”
“Sorry... thanks.”
Hae-an had watched Wa Sol and me flirting right beside him the whole time, so he understood. He really was a good friend. No—an actual angel. Did this guy leave his wings back at the dorm?
“In exchange, hyung’s buying dinner tonight. Eve’s stream starts late tonight, right?”
“Ah, yeah. Guess I’m freeloading today.”
“We’ve got stuff we need to hear about, too.”
At that one line from Hae-an, Seo-hyeon, and Cheon-woo, I glanced at Wa Sol. I’d originally wanted to eat with her.
“It’s fine. I’ll probably eat with Yun-a today anyway.”
Then it was okay. I photographed every page of Hae-an’s notes, made plans to meet the three of them for dinner, set the place and time, said goodbye, and left the classroom with Wa Sol.
That was when it happened.
“Hey, Wa Sol.”
Someone called her name. It was the same person who’d greeted her when we first walked into the classroom.
“...Are you two dating?”
“Yeah.”
She answered without a second’s hesitation. Then, completely naturally—no, as if she wanted everyone to see—she took my hand. The guy looked at our joined hands like he had a lot he wanted to say, but in the end he only managed one short word.
“...Why?”
Just that single “why.” To me, though, it was an extremely rude single word.
Of course I wasn’t going to get angry over something like that.
“...”
Wa Sol, on the other hand, looked furious. From simply holding my hand she shifted, still completely natural but very much on display, into linking arms with me.
“It’s not like I don’t feel any guilt toward you. But that thing you just said? It was pretty unpleasant.”
“But—”
“And! To answer your question just now... Gachi would never say something like that.”
“...”
I had no idea how to describe the expression on that guy’s face. He didn’t look angry, yet he also did; he looked sad and resentful at the same time. And there was one more thing...
“Let’s go, Gachi.”
“Yeah.”
I shouldn’t look back. That would probably be rude to him.
I didn’t need to be considerate, but I couldn’t help feeling a little sorry for him, so I kept my eyes forward and walked out of the classroom with Wa Sol under a lot of stares.
She hadn’t said a word the entire way out. Once we were clear of the room she quietly opened her mouth.
“Hey.”
“Hm?”
“That guy just now... you’re not going to ask?”
She meant whether I wasn’t curious who he was or what kind of relationship they’d had.
I was curious, but...
“If you don’t want to talk about it, you don’t have to.”
“...”
Suddenly she was staring straight through me.
Had I said something weird?
“Gachi.”
“Yeah?”
“Why don’t you ever ask about anything?”
“What do you mean, don’t ask?”
When I asked back, she stopped walking. Even then the arm linked through mine kept tightening, bit by bit.
“It feels like you never get curious about things people don’t want to talk about. It was the same last time with Su-yeon. Honestly, back then you didn’t even know I was nearby. But you still deliberately tried not to listen. Why is that?”
Ah, so that was what she meant. There wasn’t any special reason, really.
“There was a time when I cut myself off from everyone... no. From everything. So I know. When you’re like that, you don’t need anyone’s goodwill or comfort or encouragement at all.”
Back when I bombed the CSAT and thought my entire life was over.
I hadn’t needed anyone’s help. To be honest, everything that was given to me just felt like a hassle.
“That’s why, if someone has a memory that’s even half as painful as mine was, I don’t want to dig into it. Even my interest in it might feel like a nuisance to them.”
What you need at a time like that is probably... just a small trigger that lets you get past it.
“So I don’t ask. I’ll wait until they tell me first. And if they keep it a secret forever, that’s fine too.”
“...”
The arm linked through mine tightened even more. Strong enough that I could feel her determination to stay pressed against me just a little longer.
“Was Eve the reason you got past that?”
“...Yeah.”
“I see. So that was it.”
Leaning against me as she spoke, she didn’t ask anything else. Probably, just like I’d said a moment ago, she was waiting for me to tell her first.
...Would it be okay to talk about it? Honestly, there was no reason to keep that day a secret anymore.
The wound had already healed, and it had even become the reason I met Eve.
“That guy just now... he was a classmate who confessed to me when I was a freshman.”
Right as I was about to open my mouth to talk about that day, she spoke first.
Someone who’d confessed, huh... I’d more or less expected that.
“You must’ve been popular, so there were probably a lot of guys like that.”
“It’s a little weird saying it myself, but yeah, the number of confessions I got was probably on the high side.”
“I figured. But that senior just now... it wasn’t only that, right?”
The look on that senior’s face when he stared at her had been mixed with a lot of different emotions. It wasn’t like I had superpowers or could read every feeling a person had, but one emotion had been crystal clear.
“It kind of... looked like he felt betrayed.”
“You’re really good at reading people, Gachi.”
I turned my head to look at her face as she spoke in a drained voice.
She looked like she was remembering something with regret, with apology.
“At first we were just close friends. Then I got a little help from him... and that caused a misunderstanding. He confessed. And my answer back then was... ‘I have no intention of dating anyone.’”
And now she was dating me.
“I was partly at fault. But the way he acted just now was way too rude to you. I... don’t like that kind of thing.”
“Thanks.”
I hadn’t felt much of anything about the guy’s attitude, but I was grateful that she’d gotten angry for me.
“Don’t thank me for something like this.”
Apparently even my gratitude didn’t sit well with her.
“I’m your girlfriend. Just take it for granted.”
“Yeah... but thanks are still thanks.”
“Honestly...”
She let out a small snort of laughter.
“Though I guess this is very you...”
I couldn’t really relate to what “very me” was supposed to mean. Still, I could tell that the “me” she had in mind was a bit of a frustrating person, and that she liked that frustrating person.
Since dinner was with the guys, lunch definitely had to be with Wa Sol.
Thinking that, I took her to the little shop hidden down the alley we always went to.
After ordering on the kiosk, we just talked the way we always did, without any special physical affection. Even so, the owner looked at us and said with a quiet smile:
“Oh, this time it’s a real couple, huh?”
“Haha, yeah, it turned out that way.”
“Heh heh, I won’t deny it this time.”
The owner shot me a wink where Wa Sol couldn’t see and gave me a thumbs-up. Knowing exactly what it meant, I dipped my head a little in thanks.
This was what a real adult looked like.
“Enjoy your meal. I won’t bother you anymore, so take your time and relax.”
“Yes, thank you.”
“Thanks for the food.”
Even the adult consideration.
Cool.
“Alright, let’s eat.”
“Yeah. Ah, wait a second... we couldn’t do this on the last date, so... here, aah~”
“Huh?”
Wa Sol scooped some of the food we’d just ordered onto a spoon and held it out to me. Then, face slightly flushed, she waited for my reaction with a playful smile.
“...I have to eat this, right?”
“Obviously~”
...What do I do.
It would be a lie to say I’d never imagined something like this, but now that it was actually happening I felt happy and... embarrassed.
But I had to get used to it. We were dating, after all.
Yeah, this much was nothing.
“Aah, aah~”
“Pfft, if you open that little it won’t fit.”
“Ah, right... aah~~ mm.”
The aroma of the sauce spreading through my mouth... or rather, I didn’t feel any of that at all. I had no idea whether the seasoning was good or whether the food even tasted good or bad.
Chew, chew.
“...Was it good?”
“I don’t know...”
“Tch, you’re supposed to say it was delicious.”
“If you try it once you’ll understand how I feel.”
Saying that, I scooped a spoonful just the right size for her mouth and held it out the same way she had.
“...Me too?”
“Yeah, I want to feed you too. You’ll take it, right?”
“...W-well, I guess I have no choice. Aah~ mm.”
Opening her mouth just a little, Wa Sol ate the food I gave her, then looked away while she chewed over the taste.
Her eyes rolled around and landed on me again before she spoke.
“I can’t taste anything...”
“Right?”
We’d held hands, kissed, even slept in the same bed.
But looking at how we still couldn’t even do something like this properly...
We still had a long way to go...
After lunch with Wa Sol we split up for the afternoon because of our respective classes. It felt a little wrong to put it this way, but without her around I actually concentrated pretty well in class.
Time passed, and it was five in the afternoon.
Once all of today’s classes were over and I got home, I just dropped my bag and headed straight back out to meet the guys. For the record, Eve’s stream today started a bit late, just like Hae-an had said.
“Both Eve and Kiri are streaming late today. Eve at nine, Kiri at eight... huh?”
Come to think of it, lately it felt like Kiri had been starting an hour earlier than Eve pretty often. Was I just imagining it?
“Yo, Go Gachi!”
“Huh? Oh, hyung?”
Someone called out to me while I was on the way to the meeting spot. I turned my head and there was Su-yeon hyung. Looking at how dressed up he was, did he have a date or something?
“What’s with the getup? Got a date?”
“Had one, yeah. Just got dumped.”
“Sorry...”
“Don’t apologize.”
Must be a relative thing. Wa Sol told me not to thank her, and this hyung told me not to apologize.
“Haa, our personalities never matched from the start... I’m about to go drink some consolation soju. Wanna come? Let’s band together as fellow singles.”
Huh? Oh right, I never told him.
“Ah, sorry, I’ve got plans right now. Also, I got a girlfriend.”
“...”
They really were related. Hyung could stop time too.
Unlike Wa Sol, though, he could only freeze his own time—he just stood there completely still.
“...For real?”
Oh, he was moving again.
“Yeah, I’ve been dating Wa Sol since the day before yesterday. A lot happened so I didn’t get the chance to tell you. Sorry.”
“Don’t apologize... Right, with that Wa Sol kid... haa.”
Hyung raked a hand through the carefully styled hair he’d put up, messing it all up. Then, looking frustrated, he undid the top button of his shirt, paused for a moment, and finally said:
“Well, if it’s you it should be fine. But there’s one thing I want to ask. What did you fall for? Doesn’t seem like you’d fall for just a face.”
“Hey, I’ve got eyes too. I do look at faces, but...”
Honestly, if someone asked me why I fell for her, the first thing I’d probably say was her face. The moment I started being aware of her was because of that 99-point smile I’d seen that day.
But... why was that?
Thinking back to the day she was moving her stuff in... why had she acted so capriciously? The question floated up. I’d brushed it off as a whim at the time, but was it really a whim with no reason at all? No matter how much I thought about it, no answer came.
“Somehow I ended up falling for her. And somehow I found out I’d fallen for her... and then we started dating, I guess.”
“That’s so you.”
What the hell was “so me” supposed to mean that everyone just accepted things with that line?
At this point I kind of wanted to search it on the internet.
“Haa, never thought you’d score before me. No, seriously, how does a guy who just sits in his room watching streams pull that off? It’s not like every time you randomly went outside after a stream you ran into Wa Sol or something.”
Oh. That was so exactly what happened that I couldn’t even argue.
“Hyung, when you open your mouth you’re popular with guys, and when you keep it shut you’re popular with girls. Just keep your mouth shut in front of women and you’ll be fine.”
“What’s wrong with my mouth? This is a million-dollar mouth that no woman has ever touched.”
“Just sell it for a thousand won already.”
“Hey now, no romance in you at all. Just wait. I’ll bring a million-dollar woman soon enough.”
Please don’t actually bring someone who has a million dollars. Though knowing hyung, it might be possible.
“Alright, I’m heading out. Gonna drink at home.”
“Yeah, let’s drink with Noona sometime later.”
“Not interested in drinking with a couple... but who knows. Hit me up later.”
With that, hyung waved a hand and walked off toward home. His place was about a ten-minute walk from the apartment building Wa Sol and I lived in—close enough that dropping by anytime was easy, from what I’d heard.
I should go hang out sometime. Well, I’d be seeing him plenty anyway. There’d always be chances.
“But the map says I’m almost there—where is this place?”
I’d gotten close to the meeting spot, but the shop was hard to find, like it was underground or something. As I looked around, one person came into view.
“...Ah.”
“Oh?”
Our eyes even met.
“H-hi?”
“...Hello.”
Probably the most awkward person among my classmates.
Hye-jin, the first person I’d ever told that I liked Eve, was standing right there.