Chapter 19
Chapter 19
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 19
Chapter Title: Don't End the Stream!
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Exactly two weeks had passed since the full details about Cheeze, Aver's brand-new broadcasting platform, started pouring in.
In the meantime, the funeral-like gloom hanging over Tweet streamers and viewers had largely lifted—and I was no exception.
"No, I dodged it! Why the hell am I dying?!"
I was in the middle of my usual stream, grinding away at a new game, when I got screwed by some utterly bullshit judgment call and yelled in disbelief.
This game had been mired in controversy from launch day over whether it was trash or not, and from what I'd played so far, it absolutely was.
What kind of garbage hit detection lets you dodge an attack, the monster whiffs right past, and you still take damage? This was the kind of trash-tier judgment you'd only see in some retro game I'd played ages ago.
💬 Stream Chat — Cosmo Absolute Guardian Lmao — Hundred Flowers Uproar Nope, you didn't dodge it. — tws2425 Dodged lol < Can't dodge — Cro-Magnon Honestly, that was total bullshit lol No matter how much I vented my frustration, all I got back was mockery. How was there only one viewer defending me in all this? What a bunch of trash-tier bastards.
"This is like the tenth time catching this guy... Ah...! I wanna push into the new area too!"
— Alpaca Hunter 71 tries already lol — Swallow Tail King of Deaths try count smashed lol The King of Deaths was the toughest boss from a game I'd streamed before. After a grueling 68 tries, I'd barely cleared it—and I'd legit teared up a bit after. But now I'd shattered that record. History rewritten, I guess. Not that I wanted this damn milestone.
⚙ DONATION ⚙ 'White Forest' has donated 1,000 won. Before starting the game: I'll rush the ending this week. Skill broadcast incoming. — Teacher's Pet Sk?ill — Catfish Goat Frog This guy's got terminal delusion lol — Passing Lantern Info: This game has 34 bosses total, and after 9 hours he's still stuck on the 4th. What? 34 bosses? Why cram that many into this turd of a game? You'd think it was some AAA console title.
"Be honest, the controls on this game are dogshit, right? You guys admit it too?"
— National Hit No.1 Cosmo Dunno, haven't played it. — Elephant Hoou Any game with those hands wouldn't feel good lol — Lucid Dream 7 Tbf it looks dogshit fr lol Ugh, all talk from people who haven't even touched it. Not that I blame them—it's a fresh release today, after all.
Excuses would just make me look worse, so I shut up and hit retry. I'd nailed the patterns by now; if the judgment wasn't total BS, I could smooth this out.
📜 NEW MISSION 📜 Defeat Martyr Nahirt within 10 tries (500,000 won)
As I moved my character back for the boss fight, the familiar chime rang out with a mission window.
Whoa, wasn't this basically free money? After 71 tries mastering the patterns, they were tossing me 10 shots—and a 500k biggie mission at that?
— Runaway Frog Bet he can't lol — Seafood Bibim Sauce Giving this mission to a 71-try guy means they know it's free lol — Pink Rabbit Yep, safe bet~ My eyes went wide, but the toxic chat kept rolling.
I couldn't ignore it, though—for a split second, even I wondered if that's exactly what they meant.
Logically, who drops a "clear boss in 10 tries for 500k" on someone who's mastered it after 71? Maybe 1 or 3 tries, sure. But this? They were dead certain I'd fail.
I started hunting for the mission sender...
— Cosmo Absolute Guardian Not what I meant at all lol Good luck! There—one chat with the founder sub badge. The Chairman herself.
Sob, it was you after all, Chairman...! I never doubted it wasn't malicious. Just a boost to my spirits, right?
"Thanks for the mission, Chairman...! I'll clear it this try—watch close. Got it?"
— Arisa Jowa Death flag ON — Completely Deflated Flower When this war ends, I'm confessing to her — Soju-Flavored Hand Cream I can see the future... Nah, just vibes? — Neighbor Raises Hani No expectations this try. Just clear in 10 plz ffs Why were they jinxing me already?
Just you wait—I'll clear this try and wipe those smirks off your faces.
"Hoo... Let's go. Clear this clean and sign off smooth."
— Cosmo Absolute Guardian Pardon? Signing off? Ten-try mission chance, but I was all-in on one-try clear. Exhaling resolve, I entered the boss arena.
One chat caught my eye mid-way, but probably nothing.
The boss name 'Martyr Nahirt' and health bar popped up instantly. At the end of my character's view stood the guy—massive greatsword on his bare back, armored up.
Just the fourth story boss, but a nasty one with off-beat patterns and baits. No wonder 71 tries.
"If you wish to uncover the secret, surpass me." He drew the greatsword from his back, elegant English voiceover with subs. I'd seen it enough times to feel nothing.
To me, he was just a walking moneybag. Come at me, punk.
Whish!
I sidestepped the familiar early charge clean.
Unlike similar games, no shields here—pure evasion play demanded killer reflexes. Annoying as hell. Without that, I'd have cleared in 30 tries tops. Damn it.
Clang!
"Ugh, parrying feels like total ass!"
Even parry just chipped the stagger gauge a bit—no exposure, no real payoff. Worthless.
Seeing the white gauge barely drop over the boss HP, I gritted my teeth—and chat agreed for once.
— National Hit No.1 Cosmo Fr the merit is trash lol — Bera666 Wondering the dev's brain structure lol — Teacher's Pet Made by some soulslike noob? Dunno about that, but they sure didn't test it. No way they'd release this otherwise.
Puuk!
— Elephant Hoou Ooh backstab — Adios Dao Thinking backstab on this ㄷㄷ — Frost Moon Beast heart? Stacked stagger let me land a backhit charge into the so-called backstab powerhouse.
Boss HP chunked hard, cutting to phase 2.
"Those who seek to unearth the cult's secrets, atone with death." Dialogue flowed again; 'Martyr Nahirt' flipped to 'Secret Guardian Nahirt', HP refilled.
His plain armor warped dark and grotesque, sword reach extended—spacing got trickier.
Phase 1 was hell at first, but phase 2 was pure evil. How do they design this crap?
Thud!
"This is fucking infuriating!"
He reused phase 1 moves in 2, but reversed directions—baiting muscle memory. I knew it, but ate the hit anyway. Swallowed a curse.
Enough already.
— Olfried How is this the 4th boss lol — Cola Zero Devs sold their souls lol — Thor's Heir And same animation for bait patterns too lol Viewers admitted it was peak trash, happily spectating my pain while cursing the boss and devs.
At least they had a shred of conscience. Good.
"Almost there..."
After endless clashes, I'd whittled the boss HP near zero. Stayed calm, backed off.
Potions left—don't rush, no need to risk if I don't one-shot die. That insta-kill move? Avoidable if focused.
— Road Roller Da O — Chu Chu King move incoming? — Harbinz Looks clearable fr Chat hyped—clear was obvious—but I kept eyes locked.
Good—rush in, dodge two big ones, cram five basics. Let's do this.
As I steeled up to advance...
⚙ DONATION ⚙ 'Cosmo Absolute Guardian' has donated 10,000 won. Oh yeah, you have that Cheeze meeting tomorrow, right? "Oh, the Cheeze meeting? I was gonna announce stream-end notes about th—"
Familiar Chairman nick, dono message—I reflex-answered.
Too casual; forgot the life-or-death boss fight for a sec.
Fatal mistake in a battlefield where seconds killed.
Shiiik. Puuk!
"...Huh?"
Boss lunged nimble for his size, glowing greatsword stabbing my gut.
A massive wind-up I'd never eat normally—but my eyes wandered that instant.
And it was the insta-kill powerhouse I'd mentioned.
💥 YOU ARE PURIFIED 💥 "......"
Character crumpled; dark, heavy font message filled the screen.
I rubbed my eyes, thinking I misread. Nope.
"Aaaaaaaaagh!"
— Elephant Hoou Lmaoooooooo — Alpaca Hunter Chairman dono-timed perfectly lol — Passing Lantern Distracted to death lol — Cosmo Absolute Guardian Sorry... Denial hit—I jumped up screaming. Chairman spammed apologies in chat.
But confusion lingered.
Sure, my fault for opening my mouth on a non-urgent question... But that timing? Perfect distraction bait. Anyone could see it!
No way the Chairman stinged on mission cash with a dono, so why? That wasn't a dono moment.
"Chairman, why...!"
— Cosmo Absolute Guardian Sorry sorry ㅠㅠ No explanation, just apologies.
Even "Got curious" would've sufficed—but the blind sorry felt like "On purpose."
Dead character's unfixable, but why?
Did I piss off the Chairman somehow?