Menhera Generator: The Virgin (Not) Otaku Guy
"Hey, what's wrong with our Seol-ah?"
That was the first thing out of Su-yeon's mouth after the flood of messages from a full-blown menhera Seol-ah. She had sworn up and down that Seol-ah could trust her, that a guy like that would be ready to marry her in a week… and yet the whole plan had crashed and burned in spectacular fashion.
What could the reason have been?
Su-yeon sank into thought.
Don't tell me he already has a girlfriend?
He looked plenty scary, sure, but that was exactly the type who got snagged by some high-powered woman and ended up stuck in a ten-year long-term relationship. Plenty of guys left zero digital footprints these days, so it wasn't completely implausible.
That horrifying KakaoTalk profile picture of his, too—if his girlfriend had been the same breed of otaku since college and worked as an adult webtoon artist, she might have just shrugged it off as a hobby and left it alone—
No. There was no way anyone would just leave that alone.
Hypothesis of an existing girlfriend: rejected.
……Gay?
Surely not.
Also rejected.
Which left only one remaining theory.
Seol-ah just doesn't register as a woman to him……
She didn't know the full story, but she had at least heard that Seol-ah and that guy had lived together for a long time after coming up to Seoul. They weren't blood-related or anything, but after knowing each other that long it wouldn't be strange if he only saw her as a little sister.
There was no way some random weird girl had stolen his attention so completely that contacting Seol-ah never even crossed his mind. That only made sense if he was under hypnosis or something. And if he were that much of an idiot, Su-yeon herself would have opposed it—Seol-ah was way too good for him.
"Ugh……."
A girl who could land a boyfriend just by breathing, and yet here she was. Still, Su-yeon couldn't simply ignore her. The rose mala xiang guo Seol-ah had bought her was still sitting in her stomach, after all. The girl had a 4.0 GPA and a sweet personality, so she genuinely wanted to stay on good terms. On top of that, Seol-ah was the only one in their friend group without a partner, and the way she seemed to feel left out made Su-yeon's heart ache.
So in the end, only one method remained.
A full frontal assault was the only option left.
Is this the place……?
Seol-ah's house, which Su-yeon was visiting for the first time. The neighborhood alone reeked of money in a way that put her own university-area studio-apartment district to shame. She had already guessed from Seol-ah's allowance habits that the family was well-off, but she hadn't expected this level.
Where was the doorbell on this place, though—
"Here to look at a room?"
"Kyaaah…!!"
A massive shadow fell over her from behind, accompanied by a low, thick voice. A threatening face and a scar near the eye. If he had been holding a kitchen knife instead of grocery bags, he would have looked every bit the gangster.
She had thought the photos Seol-ah kept sending had made her used to him, but photos really could never capture the real thing. If it had been night, she would have called the police without a second thought and reported a prowler on the loose. That was Su-yeon's first impression of Ha Seung-chul.
He seemed used to that kind of reaction, because the explanation came out first.
"Ah… sorry about that. I'm not a suspicious person. I'm the guard for this boarding house. The landlady said someone would be coming soon to look at a room on the second floor……. Is that not you?"
"Ah, um. I-I'm Seol-ah's friend……."
"Seol-ah's friend? Same Korean Education major?"
"Y-yes……."
"Wow, first time meeting one of Seol-ah's friends. Come on in for now. She's not home at the moment, though…."
"What? She's not here?!"
Su-yeon immediately grabbed her phone. A pile of messages from Seol-ah had arrived five minutes earlier.
"You've got to be kidding me……."
"Uh… if you're uncomfortable, you can wait somewhere else and come back later? Just tell me where you'll be and I'll let Seol-ah know—"
"No, no. I'll come in."
It was awkward, sure, but Su-yeon decided to treat this as an opportunity. With a close little sister figure right in front of him, a guy would naturally watch his behavior. Meeting him alone like this would actually be better for figuring out what kind of person Seung-chul really was.
Su-yeon strode straight into the boarding house.
And exactly ten minutes later—
"W-wait, you're not looking for any more boarders, are you……?"
What was this place. The facilities weren't just good—they were too good.
"How much is a place like this per month……?"
"The monthly rent? Well……."
"Holy crap, it's that cheap?"
It was barely any different from the studio she was currently living in. No—factoring in the lack of maintenance fees and the fact that most meals were provided, even accounting for the commute to campus, this place came out ahead. And according to him, aside from Seung-chul himself, every other resident was a woman. People would line up even if they charged three times this price.
"The landlady runs it more like a hobby than a business. That's why she doesn't even post listings…. The person who was supposed to look at a room this time was someone she knew through the grapevine, I think? Yeah, that was it."
"I see……."
"Want to leave your contact info?"
"Yes!! Ah, n-no. It's fine."
Honestly, she would have lived here even if it meant sleeping on the living room floor when rooms ran out. But there was one single condition the landlady had set that made this place completely off-limits for Su-yeon.
"I have a boyfriend……."
"Ah, got it."
Couples strictly banned.
According to Seung-chul, the rule had been created after someone snuck their girlfriend in behind the landlady's back and did those kinds of things. Getting involved with anyone inside the boarding house was also absolutely forbidden. Not that there was any other man here besides Seung-chul in the first place.
This guy doesn't seem like a weirdo either, really…….
A good-looking person acting kind was easy to forget. A scary-looking person doing the same stuck in your memory. It wasn't so much that he was practiced at it—more like he was so used to reading the room that it naturally translated into consideration. She finally understood Seol-ah's constant refrain that "a guy that size has never once gotten into a fight."
From Seol-ah's descriptions alone she had pictured some type who couldn't even open his mouth in front of a girl, so the reality was even more surprising.
In that case, he probably already had someone, after all.
And that hypothesis of Su-yeon's seemed to be proven moments later by the woman who appeared next.
"Hey."
Squeeze.
The woman who came clomping down from the second floor grabbed Seung-chul's ass without any preamble. He frowned and twisted away, but he didn't look particularly startled.
"What is it, Seo Ji-young."
"I'm bored. Let's go to my room and play games."
"Can't you see I'm working?"
"What work do you even do."
"Seol-ah's friend is here. I should at least show her around until Seol-ah gets back."
"Just dump her on the sofa and be done with—"
"Ah, hello."
The unnie called Seo Ji-young. The moment their eyes met, Su-yeon reflexively bowed her head. For some reason Ji-young was glaring daggers at her with terrifying eyes.
"Why are you giving tours. Don't tell me she's the one who was supposed to take the room next to mine?"
"…? No?"
"Then why the hell are you playing tour guide when you're not even the guide. What are you, some house servant? Gonna start introducing the place like 'Welcome to madam's residence'?"
"Hey, I still have to earn my paycheck."
The two of them bickered back and forth. At a glance they looked like ordinary friends, but Su-yeon belonged firmly to the camp that believed men and women could never be "just friends." One of them was definitely accommodating the other because they had feelings.
And from the perspective of Su-yeon, who had already engineered five couples in their department alone, that person was clearly—
"Oh, wait. Phone."
"……."
"Yes, ma'am. Yes? Documents? One moment."
Seung-chul gave Su-yeon a little nod of apology and disappeared somewhere. That left Su-yeon and Ji-young alone in the awkward silence. Before she knew it, she had thrown out a question.
"Um, unnie."
"…Yeah?"
"Do you… like that oppa, by any chance?"
One second.
Two seconds.
And then—
"N-n-n-n-no I don't?!?!"
"……."
"Do you even know me? If you're Seol-ah's friend you're way younger than me. Some kid who hasn't even graduated college yet, what would you know…!"
"It's just… you're being way too obvious……."
Even Gureumi, the five-year-old Maltese her parents kept back home, courted people less blatantly than this. Looking at her, this Seo Ji-young person clearly wasn't the fox type either. How much did she have to like him to force herself this hard and still leak this much?
"……It's that obvious?"
"Yes."
"Ha. Then why the hell doesn't that son of a bitch notice……."
Ji-young's face went hollow in an instant as she latched onto Su-yeon and began pouring out her grievances. Being that dense should be a capital offense. If he just weren't so damn nice she could ignore him, that bastard, that dog, that pig, that horse….
Listening to it all, Su-yeon finally couldn't hold back and said something—even knowing Seol-ah liked the same person.
"Can't you just confess?"
"…No."
"Why not?"
"If I confess first, I lose. A-and… I've done some stuff wrong to him……."
"……."
Judging purely by her expression she had already lost several thousand times over.
"What did you do wrong? Did he confess to you a long time ago and you dumped him or something?"
"That nerd? As if."
"Then what is it?"
"Ah… there's something I can't talk about. I really can't say it, but just, ugh. I messed up……."
"……."
In the time it takes to say all that, just confess already and get rejected or whatever. Honestly, unless she'd committed a sex crime against him, there was no way he'd turn her down. Did she really think a guy who looked that sincere would be thinking about anyone else while she was right there? Date a lot and have a lot of sex while you're still young, and so on.
Su-yeon had a lot she wanted to say, but she bit it all back. She was on Seol-ah's side, after all.
"Hey… what's your name?"
"Me? Lee Su-yeon."
"Could I get your number, Su-yeon? Please. I don't have anyone in this house I can talk about this stuff with……."
Watching Ji-young cling to her hand with such desperate intensity, Su-yeon thought to herself:
Seol-ah probably didn't stand a chance at dating after all.