Chapter 79
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Translator: Ebonarch
Chapter: 79
Chapter Title: Even So, Reality Remains
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I comforted my sobbing eldest sister, and we lay side by side on the bed.
It was the usual position for drifting off to sleep, but both of our eyes stayed wide open, staring up at the ceiling.
"You said it yourself, noona. No matter what the truth is, we've always been family."
"Yeah..."
"That goes for you too. So don't worry so much."
"Yeah... I know. I know it up here." She tapped her head. "But..."
Her childish whining didn't suit Sujeong noona at all.
I lay still, using one arm as her pillow, and gently stroked her hair.
Come to think of it, Sujeong noona's been the most anxious about the adoption issue from the start. We slept together in my room every night... but that wasn't enough.
Even accounting for everything, I couldn't shake the feeling that her proposed solution was awfully bold.
But I knew how desperately she wanted to protect our "family" framework—and to belong to it—so I didn't bring it up again.
That said, if things had gone according to her plan and I'd ended up in some intimate relationship with Sujeong noona, leading to marriage... Ugh. What can I say? It's not even realistic; I can't picture it.
I could imagine it with Hwayeon, who bickered with me every time we met, or Geumbi noona, who occasionally got physical.
But Sujeong noona had always been the "kind eldest sister," the "head of the household," so it was even harder to see her that way.
...Though I'd been turned on by her body more than once or twice.
Let's skip that part. It's just a guy's instincts, right? Can't help it.
"What're you thinking about so deeply all of a sudden?"
"Just... wondering what it'd be like if we really got together. Tried picturing it, but it won't come to mind."
"Why? Am I less appealing than the others? Not your type?"
"That's not what I meant. I've never even compared you to anyone."
"Really? ...You're not saying I'm not worth comparing, right?"
"Absolutely not. More importantly, why do you keep steering it that way?"
"Well, Geumbi's going on about the taste of your cum like it's no big deal, and with Hwayeon, you straight-up went to a motel... Ugh, forget it. I don't wanna talk about it anymore."
"......Noona, you said you weren't interested in me that way, right? Couldn't see me as a guy, didn't feel attracted rationally?"
Her girlish reaction prompted me to subtly remind her of her own words.
Sujeong noona buried her face in my side, mumbling into my pajamas.
"Well, yeah, at first... But, you know, I can still imagine it. With everything that's happened, I can't just pretend I don't think about what it'd be like with you."
"So it wasn't at first, but it's been bothering you more lately?"
"Don't make it sound like some drama plot. It's not... that casual a feeling. Tch."
If it wasn't casual, wasn't that even more of a problem?
If she'd used me right up to the end just to preserve the family framework, I'd accept it calmly or get mad.
But hearing something like this—not quite a confession, but close... it's tricky. What do I even say? Sigh.
Sujeong noona had a clear goal in mind, so I couldn't play it slow like I did with Hwayeon.
And it wasn't 100% certain yet, so jumping straight to stamping marriage papers with noona felt off.
But even if I was adopted, we were family once— is that even possible? I should look into it later.
I vaguely recalled hearing that one side had to be disowned first.
Wouldn't that mean leaving the original family framework anyway? Had Sujeong noona not thought that far?
"Jigu Yang, you're spacing out again, aren't you? I... said some pretty embarrassing stuff. Can't you focus on me right now?"
"Hmm. You're the one making it confusing. Anyway, it's because of you that my head's a mess, so cut me some slack."
"Okay...? Whatever it is, if it's troubling you because of me, I'll let it slide. Hehe, teehee."
Even her laugh was cute. Just say you like me outright, noona.
Then I could accept your confession... Nah, couldn't. Marriage is with one person only.
And if Sujeong noona really is the adopted one, then with Geumbi noona or Hwayeon... Urk. Whew.
Sweet fantasies always led to a dizzying reality.
Dry coughs and deep breaths didn't clear my vision, so I pressed my eyelids and pictured the two upstairs.
Neither one's easy... but regardless, once the truth comes out, I might have to leave home no matter what.
Only then did I understand why Sujeong noona had urged me at the restaurant to live separately.
Now, I doubted I'd confront Mom as aggressively as I'd grilled noona earlier.
"Sorry for dumping this mess on you, noona."
"Huh? What's that supposed to mean now?"
"Making you worry about contacting Mom and our situation. You said I was at the center of it all—should've stepped up sooner."
"Took you long enough? ...Not that I can say much; I've messed up plenty too. Call it even."
"That's been the case so far. What about going forward?"
"...Jigu, got any better ideas than moving out?"
Sujeong noona cautiously asked my opinion, unable to think of anything better.
I turned to meet her eyes and blurted out whatever came to mind.
"If I'm moving out anyway, maybe I should just go overseas with Mom?"
"Overseas...? For good?"
"Not sure how long, but once I'm there, I can get the full story from her. If our suspicions are right... I might not come back."
"...With Geumbi, maybe we could patch things up somehow and go back to how it was?"
"In your opinion, is Hwayeon a lost cause?"
"......We said we're done. But if we're revealed as real siblings... no. Better to stay apart."
Her words said one thing, but her hand clung to my collar like she didn't want to let go.
The gap between her heart and actions mirrored my own reluctance to leave home.
So.
That's why.
I had to leave even sooner, before these feelings solidified.
"Noona."
"Yeah."
"Can you lend me some money? I've got a lot of stuff, so a sauna or motel won't cut it for long."
"Of course—I'll book you a hotel room. ...When are you leaving?"
"Tomorrow morning? Around when they head to work and school. I'll pack quick and clear out."
"...Where to? Don't go too far."
"You're the one who told me to leave."
"That's...! What I had to say as your noona, as the eldest. Ugh..."
"Hehe, I know. Sorry, sorry—no more teasing."
"...No, go ahead. Might not get the chance later."
Her nails dug slightly into my skin through the pajamas.
But I didn't complain about the pain—instead, I patted her shoulder.
"What about near the airport? Not sure about going overseas yet, but I can meet Mom right away when she returns."
"Pretty practical for something so spontaneous. ...Guess I owe you an apology. Here I am, saddling my little brother with all this baggage."
"Feels heavy enough to crush me. Just like your chest, noona."
"Eek?! J-Jigu! Sexual harassment in the middle of a serious talk?"
"If we marry, you'd hear stuff like this every day. Can't handle this, how'll you survive newlywed life?"
"That's......! It was impulsive, okay? I wasn't 100% serious about stamping those papers."
"What percent then?"
"......98%."
Basically all of it.
What's the difference from a confession?
An engagement ring could be a soda bottle. Sigh. Happy dilemma or what?
Her laugh told me she didn't mind.
But admitting I liked it too might unleash a storm, so I kept my mouth shut.
"...Jigu."
"Yeah."
"I'll explain everything to the others when you leave."
"Thanks. Don't tell them where I went until Mom's back."
"Got it. I'll tell her to hurry home too."
"She'll freak when she hears."
"Hehe. Maybe the adoption thing's just a minor hiccup for her?"
"That'd be for the best, huh? Hehe, haha."
The conversation started with shouting, brought tears to our eyes, and ended in laughter.
If it's a good ending, all's well—that's what I'd tell myself as I close the book and leave the room.
"......Jigu."
"Yeah."
"Before you go, one last wish?"
"What?"
"Close your eyes and wait a sec."
"Huh? Like this?"
"Stay still, don't move......"
Sujeong noona made another quiet request, and I closed my eyes without suspicion.
I heard her move away, expecting a surprise gift—
Mwah.
"Eek?!"
Smack, mwah.
Warmth touched my lips, and something wet slipped in to say hello.
One step... no, half a step into the doorway.
A light kiss. When I opened my eyes, noona stood there, face half-hidden by her hair, cheeks flushed.
"I-I wanted to try a kiss at least. We even considered marriage, so a first kiss... that's okay, right? R-right?"
When did our relationship advance that far?
It'd be a lie to say I never imagined it, but hadn't we each just thought about it separately, without discussing?
"......Take care, noona."
"Mmm. You too—call anytime if something comes up, Jigu."
Sujeong noona never met my eyes, seeing me off as I left the room.
It felt like a farewell for my imminent departure, so I forced a smile.
Back in my room, I lay on the bed staring blankly for a while.
The lingering warmth on my lips kept sleep at bay.
Is this the right thing...? Sighhh.
I closed my eyes, sighing deeply over and over.
Tossing for about 30 minutes, I finally dozed off.
Deep night, or perhaps early morning.
My lower half itched, so I tried rolling over.
"Mmph, mm?"
Something made a sound from under the covers that it shouldn't.
Familiar sensations made me turn back, confirming my pants were fully down below.
If someone's in my room at night staring at my dick... gotta be Geumbi noona.
It felt heartless after our talk with Sujeong noona right before bed.
But this was one-sided—she'd ambushed me—and thinking this was our last time... I pretended to sleep again.
"Feels good, you can keep going, mnya."
"Mmph... slurp, suck."
Hearing my sleepy mumble, my shaft got slicker down there.
A flicking tongue tapped the head teasingly.
I kept up the act, pulling the blanket up to my chest to avoid eye contact.
Knock knock.
"Jigu, you up? I'm coming in."
"......Huh?"
A knock, then someone entered before I could reply.
In this house, she spoke casually to me, her voice distinctly different from the one I'd heard upstairs earlier—
"What the—Jigu Yang. You're awake, why didn't you answer?"
"...You came in before I could say anything, Geumbi noona."
"Did I? Anyway, mind if I crash next to you? Sujeong unnie... didn't come tonight, huh."
She tossed a pillow by my head and lay down casually.
I tried not to panic, hiding my expression in the dark room.
Why's Geumbi noona here now? Wait, if she's the one who lay down, then who's down there...?!
I couldn't control the twitching between my legs.
The lips down there seemed even more panicked than me.
"Jigu Yang."
"Yeah, noona."
"Can we talk before sleep?"
"Uh, yeah, sure...... uh-huh, fine."
I pondered for 3 seconds.
Revealing the other's presence felt like an unspoken threat of teeth on my head from below.
In this absurd, awkward bed-sharing, Geumbi noona slowly turned to me and spoke.
"About what we talked about earlier. Y'know, drinking with you might lead to... that."
"Mmhmm."
"How'd that make you feel?"
"Uh? Well, see, noona..."
Even in the dark, Geumbi noona's eyes shone with affection and sparkle.
But they didn't fit the current situation at all.
Feeling unknown lips start moving slightly under the covers,
I swallowed dryly, floundering in confusion more tangled than pacing the yard, unsure what to tell Geumbi noona.