#27 - Lulu Hates Action
"Everyone, for the time being, my streaming hours are gonna be a bit shorter due to some personal stuff. Sorry about that."
In the stream that started right on time as always, Lulu said this and bowed her head to us.
Actually, Lulu had done this once before.
It was around mid-April, about three months after her debut.
Back then, she'd cut her streams short for about two weeks. Normally she went from 8 p.m. to midnight or even 1 a.m., but suddenly she was ending at 11 p.m.
If a game looked like it might run long, she'd save without fail, shut it down, and hit end stream.
Lulu was the type who often extended her streams on a whim anyway, and she'd never once no-showed or been late. So the viewers were understanding about it.
"And with that in mind, today's game is! Dugudugudugu~"
Lulu started doing her signature cute lip trill.
Once her adorable lip trill wrapped up, the game that came out of her mouth was something totally unexpected.
"Sanjebi!"
Sanjebi, a platformer action game set in a futuristic Joseon era where you control a retired soldier.
Among Korean indie games, it boasts impressive polish and a solid story, with a huge fanbase to boot.
But why did I say it was unexpected for Lulu to pick this one?
"...I wonder if Lulu can actually beat this?"
Sanjebi has insanely tough difficulty, even on normal.
Sure, with enough tries, anyone could beat it eventually, but considering Lulu's trash controls, it was obvious it'd take her forever.
"Huuu... Let's do this, I can do it, yeah yeah."
Lulu seemed to know that too, muttering it like a pep talk to herself.
Meanwhile, the viewers were curious about something else entirely.
The viewers had some conscience, at least—they didn't suggest hard mode. They all pushed for normal instead.
Why not easy? Simple: easy mode makes you invincible. Zero health loss. It's basically a story mode for players with awful controls.
The second Lulu heard that, she switched to her sneaky side-eye sprite and started asking us.
"...Can't I do easy?"
1000 Candies donated!
Lulu kept side-eyeing us while hovering the mouse pointer over easy in the difficulty select screen.
She kept glancing at chat, and in response, the viewers hit her with even stronger protests.
In the end, Lulu caved to the backlash and went with normal.
"Lulu... this is gonna be tough... I feel like I'm gonna get stuck on the first stage and totally wreck the stream..."
No way it'd be that bad, even with your skills.
Besides, even if it tanks, these people love it. They'd watch you suffer for three hours straight? It's a reward.
So Lulu, just stick to normal like a good girl.
Lulu let out a deep sigh and started the game on normal.
*
Lulu was going through the tutorial, absorbing the story and learning the controls.
But her attention was elsewhere.
"Wow... so cuuuute...."
She was gushing over the character's pixel sprite.
"Isn't it super cute? Like boing! boing! jumping around!"
Not her own playable character—she meant a key NPC in the game.
Sanjebi was famous for that too: its jaw-dropping pixel art.
Since it was just the tutorial, Lulu managed to play through with barely any mistakes.
Well, there were a few spots where she'd have died in real combat.
"Huh? I swear I pressed it... ehehehe..." "Oh no, I fell... but I can just keep going...!"
The tutorial didn't let you die, but if it had, those moments would've been gold.
Anyway, after getting into the story, Lulu reached the first area.
Cyberpunk Joseon.
And that's when Lulu's nightmare stream truly began.
Whoosh! Whoosh! Whoosh!
Lulu's character was moving stylishly, using its mechanical arm to grapple around everywhere.
But then...
"Wh-what!?"
Whiiiir~
Splat!
...She whiffed a grapple in midair and ate dirt.
"......Oopsie, my bad! Everyone makes mistakes!"
No, almost no one messes up there....
Lulu brazenly brushed it off and slipped up a few more times before finally clearing the first map.
Yeah, the first map.
I'd seen plenty of bad streamers, but no one this innovatively terrible.
"Uuuu... Platformers are haaaard...."
No, it's not the platformer—it's you....
That thought slipped out, but Lulu's horror story was just getting started.
Whip! Thwack!
Swoosh! Crunch!!
Lulu's character's mechanical arm shot toward a random mob, then she kicked it flying.
"Ooh...! What a hit feel!"
Impressed by the game's punchy combat, Lulu went full aggressive—totally unlike her usual self—diving at more mobs.
But if she landed a basic combo perfectly, she wouldn't be Lulu.
Whoosh!
"Huh?"
Crack!
"Wha!?"
She botched the attack on a mob and ate a counter hit.
Her health dropped a quarter, and in a panic, she backed off.
"What the heck! Why does it hurt so much!?"
Lulu, that's just how platformers work. And the combat's not even hard—why'd you do that?
Real bosses are gonna have our Lulu stuck all day, I bet.
*
Still, she played better than the viewers expected, grinding her way to the first area's boss over three hours.
When she finally met the boss, Lulu gave us her pleading side-eye sprite and begged.
"Um... everyone...? Can I please just try easy mode this one time? For real...?"
The viewers had suffered through her play enough times to feel the pain, but her cute reactions made it all worth it.
Maybe that's why? The Lulu squad wasn't letting her run.
"Eeeee...!"
Lulu threw a cute little fit, then dove right in without another word. She knew we wouldn't budge anyway.
She was just fishing for extra aegyo.
And so Lulu...
"Yaaaaah!! It's rigged!! Totally rigged!!! Press it alreadyyyy!!!"
With her signature lispy scream, she heroically wiped out. Again and again and again.
...Honestly, other streamers take about an hour to an hour and a half to get here on average.
Lulu burned two and a half hours on pure skill issues, then got her ass handed to her by the boss nonstop for thirty minutes straight.
And in the end...
"...Everyone, it's end-stream time now."
It was 11 p.m., Lulu's cutoff.
"......Can I, like, really, really sorry, but use it now? Easy mode. Just for the boss."
Her voice mixed a hint of aegyo with bone-deep exhaustion.
If we said no here, we'd be 100% trash.
"I'm really, really sorry.... And I'll at least try all the boss fights on normal first...."
Lulu apologized profusely, switched to easy...
Boom! Boom! Boom! Kaboosh!!
And finally took down the boss.
As she watched the story afterward, Lulu grumbled in frustration.
"I wanna see more story... eee..."
Everyone in the Lulu squad probably smiled bittersweetly at her genuine, heartfelt reaction—she really wanted that story.
At the same time, some viewers like me were probably wondering, Why the early ends exactly?
Has to be some out there. Aren't you curious too? Why Lulu's doing this.
I hope it's nothing bad. We wanna watch her streams forever.
"Alright everyone, that's it for today...."
"Thanks for watching Lulu's stream today too... See you next time...."
"Lulubaba...! Meet you in your dreams tonight.... My... sacrifi~ces...."
She must've been pretty bummed, 'cause she couldn't even muster her usual bright sign-off energy.
Hoping Lulu wouldn't feel too down about it, I wrapped up the edit quicker than usual.
With the wish that this clip would give her some strength.