Thank Goodness the Handles Snapped
Thank goodness the handles snapped!
The second Medongbu company dinner had been planned under one ironclad goal: it absolutely had to surpass the first. Honestly, though, beating the last dinner was never going to be easy. Why? Because last time's menu had been nothing less than hanwoo—Korea's prized beef, the kind that runs about forty-five dollars a serving if you order it in a restaurant.
A company dinner that could top that? Would I have to drag everyone to a Michelin three-star? For one brief moment I actually, seriously considered a real Michelin three-star. But no matter how I turned it over, my cheap little tongue—raised on frozen meals and delivery food—didn't seem likely to know what to do with three-star cooking. I'd also heard those places served laughably small portions, so the Michelin three-star was struck from the list. A company dinner ought to feel generous. You're supposed to eat until you're ready to burst, right?
I kept worrying over how to handle the second Medongbu dinner until I landed on a conclusion. The menu alone could never beat last time. I needed something special on top of the food. A choice the usual me would never make...!
"...So that's why you rented a party room?"
I nodded at once at Eunha's question.
"Yep!"
How many hours had I burned surfing the net, ready to spend whatever it took, just to land a well-reviewed party room? A true boss, pouring her own time without a second thought into scouting the venue for a company dinner...! Magnificent...!!
"...You didn't know?" Yeryeong asked.
"No. I did ask, but she said it was a surprise, so the menu was staying a secret..."
"I suppose that's what you'd call very boss-like..."
Judging by the two of them, the surprise had landed. And a surprise that lands is not so different from already having the win half in hand. The shopping-bag handles all snapping on the way here hadn't meant today was unlucky. It must have been a small misfortune paid in advance, so the dinner could end in success.
Thank goodness the handles snapped!
A private space with no random crowd in it guarantees the people using it a certain kind of freedom. Maybe that's why there's demand for a party-room system that rents out exactly that kind of privacy. Then again, home is private too. Should I just make our place the meeting spot? Wouldn't that make me look like a cheapskate trying to save on the dinner bill?
Right up until I rented a party room for the first time in my life, I'd turned that worry over and over, and in the end I'd booked it feeling as if I were throwing a gamble. The moment I stepped inside, I let out a silent sigh of relief.
"This is way nicer than I expected...?"
The gamble I'd thrown seemed to have landed. It hadn't hit me much in the photos, but in person the place had a quiet atmosphere. A home is a space where chasing practicality matters almost as much as chasing beauty, and this room held a mood you don't easily find in a space like that.
"I think the photos will come out best if we shoot from here..."
"Boss, hurry over so we can take the picture!"
Eunha and Yeryeong seemed to like that atmosphere quite a bit themselves. Watching the two of them leap straight to taking photos the instant they saw the interior, I felt the hours I'd poured into surfing the net had been worth it. I put on a satisfied look and moved to join them for the commemorative shot———
...A photo?
"Aaaah!!! I should've brought the film camera and the digital camera!!!"
I'd spent real money on those...! If not a moment like this, when were they ever going to have their big moment...! Our film camera and digital camera hadn't seen action in months...!
"Hurry up and come over!"
"...Coming."
You two.... I'm sorry...! I'll take better care of you from now on...!!!
After the group photo, I couldn't have said how long we waited. At last, today's dinner arrived. Flounder sashimi, salmon salad, assorted sushi, tuna sashimi. In an instant the table had been occupied by the sea. If the last dinner had been a land special, this one felt like an ocean special.
Taking in the ocean-special spread, Yeryeong frowned slightly, as if worried.
"Do you think we'll actually be able to finish all of this...?"
"We're not at a restaurant, so if we take our time it might be doable.... Unnie? Didn't you order way too mu——"
There was definitely a little too much food. But all of it was going exactly according to plan. The instant their eyes locked onto the sheer amount and their attention on me vanished completely—
"First, allow me to offer my thanks to everyone who has graced this gathering by attending the second Medongbu company dinner."
I used that sliver of time to finish my transformation.
"That Märchen's NewTube has come this far owes a very great deal to the insanely cracked broadcasting sense of Medongbu's Commander-in-Chief, and to the captains of the 1st and 2nd Divisions, who possess the editing ability to extract nothing but the pure essence of that insanely cracked sense of mine."
The me of this moment was not the eternally seventeen, national-treasure-class beautiful-girl streamer. Draped in a cape that existed nowhere else in the world, wearing pixel sunglasses dripping with charisma, the me of this moment was Medongbu's Commander-in-Chief. Märchen the Unyielding.
"This second Medongbu dinner was convened to honor the service of those Medongbu captains, so I hope every captain in attendance will enjoy this gathering without the slightest burden, and then be on their way."
When the Commander-in-Chief's opening address came to an end, the captain of the 1st Division nodded and muttered.
"So that's why you rented the party room..."
Correct!
Pull something like that at a hanwoo specialty restaurant and they'd obviously treat me like a crazy woman, right? And if, by some one-in-a-million chance, I did it anyway, someone might recognize me and throw up a post on social media: Popular NewTuber causes a scene at a restaurant? For the record, not doing it had never been an option. Otherwise it wouldn't be any different from the last dinner! And if you're going to rent a party room, you have to squeeze every last drop of value out of it, don't you?
"All right, then. Before we officially start eating.... What should we watch on this?"
As I said it, I gave the beam projector that came with the party room a couple of taps. With this, we could eat and watch anime on a big screen, right? It felt a little like the remote for a restaurant TV had become my personal property. You can't do this at a hanwoo specialty place, can you? By anyone's measure, the party room wins, right?
Still soaked in the joy of victory, I thought for a moment about what to put on, then decided.
"...We've hit four hundred thousand subscribers anyway, so how about we revive some old memories and watch a few old videos?"
"Oh, that sounds great!"
Yeryeong answered, and Eunha nodded to show she agreed. And so, out of nowhere, a Märchen NewTube viewing session began. Just watching straight through would be boring, of course, so I added a little thrill by putting it on shuffle—no telling what would come up.
All right. The long-awaited first video is...?!
"I'm a maid, pyong!"
"Oh, come on..."
It burst out so suddenly that a vicious curse nearly tore out of me on instinct, but I managed to choke it back down. ...How does that come up first thing? Is the AI trying to screw me?
I was busy feeding the flames of rage and hatred toward that AI, fixing it with a killing glare honed to a razor's edge, when Eunha—having popped a piece of sashimi into her mouth, chewed, and swallowed—opened hers.
"Honestly, I thought you'd do a drinking mukbang at least once more after that. You called it the true finale, but I was sure you'd still do it one more time..."
"If I were a serious drinker, maybe. I'm not someone who particularly likes alcohol. Once I made up my mind not to, I just naturally stopped."
I said it while picking up some salmon salad and eating. ...Eating salad makes me feel like I'm getting healthier.
I was thinking that, and had just lifted the octopus sushi I'd marked as my next target with my chopsticks, when Yeryeong—having swallowed a piece of shrimp sushi—spoke.
"But isn't it kind of a shame to never do a drinking mukbang at all? Even just showing yourself drunk is content that scores above average, no question."
...She had a point.
Views were flooding in like mad right now, and here I was letting cheat-code content rot—content guaranteed to hit at least par, content whose cooldown had long since reset because I hadn't touched it in ages. From a pro streamer's point of view, it was pretty regrettable.
...Should I do it just once, with a real true-finale feel?
But I'd even sworn on stream that I would never drink again. Someone out there was definitely going to remember. And kicking something off with a once should be fine, right? mindset felt an awful lot like raising a flag. Like digging my own grave again.
I worried for a moment, then reached a conclusion.
"If something like Tomoe liquor, or Raider liquor, ever comes out as collab merch, I have been thinking I might buy it and do a drinking mukbang as a sort of review..."
In this industry, that's the stuff they call so-and-so juice. Of course, I wasn't holding my breath. Collab merch for Tomoe, who'd already been out in the world for ten years—and alcohol, of all forms—was never going to be easy. If a boozehound character showed up in Raider and managed to establish themselves as a popular one, maybe then I could hope a little?
Anyway, the plan was to tie my drinking mukbang to Tomoe Juice or Raider Juice, both of which had a markedly slim chance of ever existing. If Tomoe Juice or Raider Juice never came out, I wouldn't have to dig my own grave. And if they did release, and I had to do the mukbang, and I ended up digging that grave again anyway? Even then I'd be left with two things at once: the fact that the stream had been a massive hit, and the satisfaction of having bought the merch.
This was the new secret technique of a me who had grown.
"But I don't think it's going to come out.... So, well. Probably no drinking mukbang for me."
Status: ON...!