Marchen Is a Kids' Streamer

Today was Sunday.

At last, the days left until Raider launched had dropped into the single digits. An auspicious day, if there ever was one.

And then———

"So a ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠week after hitting a hundred thousand subscribers, I've hit a hundred and fifty thousand."

It was also the day I woke up and discovered I had become a NewTuber with a hundred and fifty thousand subscribers, and the day I was obligated to put on rabbit pajamas and sing children's songs.

A tragedy wedged between two celebrations. Not a pretty picture. This wasn't even a sandwich.

Of course, it was a tragedy for me and a celebration for the viewers, so from their side it probably wasn't a sandwich at all. It was a three-tier cake.

I like three-tier cake too...! Why am I the only one who has to eat the sandwich...!!!

"...How did you know? I was planning to stream in rabbit pajamas all day today."

They actually called it. ...Was it that obvious?

Apparently it hadn't been that obvious after all.

Anyway, the donor was saying something strange. A newbie who hadn't been watching long?

"What are you talking about? I'm the eternal seventeen-year-old streamer, hello? I'm seventeen for life. Pathetic? What's pathetic?"

"That's right, Eternal Seventeen! Nothing is impossible! ...Anyway, there's a reason I'm wearing rabbit pajamas all day! More precisely, it has to do with today's content! I have not simply gone insane after staring down a cruel reality, so kindly stop the slander!"

Of course, I had no intention of revealing it just yet.

There was something I had to do first.

"...All right, then. In order to make good on my pledge, I'm going to step away and change."

In this moment, and this moment alone...!!!

...Even if it was only for a little while, me, a kids NewTuber? Had this world actually started to rot?

The rabbit pajamas I'd bought were the pink one-piece kind you sometimes see in anime, top and bottom sewn into a single suit.

If I had to explain the vibe a little more specifically... it's the night you're sleeping over at Supporting Character A's house, and Supporting Character B is so short that they have no choice but to borrow the pajamas A wore as a kid. Those pajamas, of course, are rabbit pajamas. B, whose small frame is a lifelong complex, does not want to wear cute rabbit pajamas fit only for little kids, but there is nothing else to sleep in, so B puts them on anyway, and the rabbit pajamas drag B's unrivaled cuteness out into the open!!! That kind of rabbit pajamas. The kind that shows up in exactly that situation.

"Of course, there's also the version where popular Supporting Character C, who's hosting a pajama party, just happens to be into animal pajamas, so everybody ends up in them.... But the first one feels a little closer to the royal road, doesn't it? Oh, and it's ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠also a tool people reach for when they're fishing for the gap moe of a character who's usually mature, which feels plenty royal-road in its own right. Personally I love gap moe, so that version is more my taste. Though the prop that actually pulls gap moe out of a mature character is, more often than rabbit pajamas, a cute little stuffed animal...."

"Which means this is basically cosplay, isn't it? Right now I am wearing an extremely otaku outfit."

"I wasn't done talking, you know? The actually important part starts now. ...These children's songs are pretty short. Most of them don't even clear two minutes. And that's with the same lyrics on repeat. I squeak out one song and call it done? You people are absolutely going to have something to say."

The chat's reaction? I didn't need to look. Is your conscience dead? Long time no see, Marchen, you little shit. Downfall spam. End the stream and drop dead spam. If you're gonna do this, just bring the rabbit hop back. Something along those lines, right?

"So I prepared about three songs, choreography included, and on top of that I brought one song that isn't a children's song but does have the word rabbit in the title. ...Choreographing nursery rhymes at this age. I did get a little hit of reality."

The moment I said it, the viewers split. Only three songs? The prep time had been short, sure. Whose nose were three songs supposed to stick to? Then again, if you counted the rabbit pajamas staying on until the stream ended, maybe it was fine.

Whether they said it or not.

"Let's begin!"

I started in on the first rabbit nursery rhyme.

For this part I lightly pinched the tips of the rabbit ears on the pajamas and gave them a tug, then struck a running pose before finishing in a track athlete's victory stance.

Here I put on a crying gesture, then shook my head hard at the don't-tease-me line. After that, wearing the most serious face I could manage, I ran in place much faster than before.

Both hands drew circles in the air. One small circle. One big circle.

...And when I hit the I'm a darling little rabbit line, I smiled and pressed both index fingers into my cheeks.

Then I pulled out the carrot I'd stuffed into the pocket when I put the pajamas on. And when I made the gesture of nibbling that carrot...!!!

The chat went up in flames.

...Still, the reaction was good enough to be ridiculous, so preparing it had been worth something.

Only after I'd sung three nursery rhymes about rabbits and one song with the word rabbit in the title, and raked in a flood of donations celebrating a hundred and fifty thousand subscribers and the fulfillment of my pledge, could I finally get on with the actual stream.

"All right. Time for today's content. I bet a few of the quick ones have already guessed."

Today's content was a game. A grateful little game that had dredged up, from the back of my memory, a VR dating sim I'd buried there.

Yes. The game I'd prepared for today was———