He Just Didn't Want To
Yuria had never cried out loud like this since her childhood. She didn't know how much energy it took to sob while throwing her entire body into it.
Twenty minutes. Or perhaps thirty. Her shoulders kept trembling as she cried. Slowly the strength left her. Her tear glands dried up; no more droplets could form, and her eyes grew dry and aching. The sobbing body finally quieted.
'Ah... What did I do? I'm going crazy.'
She never cared much what others thought of her. But this was different. She sat on the floor right in front of everyone, bawling her eyes out. Not just anyone either—her colleagues at the research lab, people she would have to work with for the foreseeable future.
'How are they all going to look at me now?'
Yuria knew exactly how much power she held. There wouldn't be any idiots openly teasing her right to her face.
But behind her back they would tear her apart until there was nothing left to chew on. The rumor would spread fast. She had enemies.
'I've really lost my mind. What kind of situation is this?'
Shame crashed over her late. Words she had tossed around endlessly at the lab and school came rushing back.
Crying won't change anything.
That was the line she had used whenever she bragged to her rivals, subordinates, or seniors who had lost in contests, matches, or interviews.
'Thinking about it now, that was such a stupid thing to say. Crying doesn't make the outcome any different.'
She slowly gathered herself, brushed off her backside, and stood. The leftover bitterness and grief still pressed down, but there was nothing she could fix right away.
“If you finish today, come straight home. No detours. We’ll talk about this again later. You know what this is, right? We can’t end things like this.”
“Yeah. Okay. I’ll head home. See you then.”
Yuria stormed out of the lab. Once she got home she would have to figure out what lie to tell Zach.
#
Zach slipped out of the lab faster than the schedule allowed and headed straight for the inn where Yuria was staying. On the way he stopped at a fruit stand and bought a bundle of strawberries.
The season was at its peak—juicy and ripe—and they were her absolute favorite fruit.
“I’m home?”
Is this how it feels to own a pet dog?
The moment her footsteps started up the stairs, Yuria recognized him and waited right in front of the door.
“How did you know?”
Zach grinned. He had left work hours earlier than usual, yet somehow she had known.
“I just... had a feeling. This was definitely you. Ahaha. Right again.”
“Thanks for waiting. I missed you.”
“Ahaha.”
Zach was the type to casually toss out lines that made her blush. Yuria had only known him while he was still grieving her death. Even then his love had been different, but he had rarely said it so openly.
Zach washed the strawberries and brought them to her. When something important happened he always had to put something in her mouth.
Yuria bit into a cold strawberry one by one and listened with her ears wide open.
“I told Evelyn we’re getting a divorce.”
Years of experience had warned her a bomb was about to drop from Zach’s lips. That he hadn’t spat the strawberry out was pure luck.
“Wah... wah...”
Yuria pointed straight at him with her index finger. Her hand was shaking.
She muttered under her breath that he must have lost his mind.
Where on earth did this bold side of him come from? She was genuinely surprised. Even if the nobles loved to cheat and keep side women, divorce was another story.
Even if Evelyn was just a commoner, she was a sixth-circle mage. A noble’s wife wasn’t the kind you could simply discard like a peasant. If you wanted an uncontested divorce you had to give up a lot.
“You’re joking, right? Seriously...”
This version of Zach was nothing like the one Yuria remembered. Back then he had been sharp on the surface but slow to act. He had felt... unfamiliar.
“I spent a lot of time thinking about it before I went to sleep last night. I want to be with you, but what should we do? Should we do like other nobles and keep marriage and love separate?”
Having mistresses was just the nobles’ fantasy. The empire had practiced monogamy since its founding. No one except the emperor could keep another woman beside his wife.
Even if adultery was common, Evelyn would never let him remarry Yuria as long as he stayed married to her.
“Yeah. Then it’s fine... keeping the marriage?”
“Would that really be okay?”
Zach remembered how much Yuria used to feel jealous. Even as students, she had made sure no other girl sat with him at mealtimes. If he was with her and his gaze landed on another woman, she would sulk and pout.
Now she was suggesting they keep the marriage? Would that even be all right?
“Of course it is. I’ll be fine. You’ll be fine too. This is unavoidable. Who would have known I’d be resurrected? It’s not your fault.”
“Thank you.”
Yuria smiled and started chattering again. She said Zach could keep the marriage even if he stayed with Evelyn.
But Zach knew it was a lie.
Zach pulled her into his arms. He rested her chin on his shoulder and stroked her back with one hand.
“But... I just don’t want to.”
His quiet voice brushed her ear. The tone that said he understood and would accept anything melted her.
“I’m sorry.”
Yuria spoke in a voice thick with moisture. Zach guessed what she meant.
What was she sorry for?
That things had turned out like this?
That he had been resurrected?
The deeper they dug, the more wounds they would both suffer. He didn’t pinch her. Instead he hugged her tighter.
Yuria burrowed deeper into his chest.
“Are you staying here tonight?”
“No. I promised Evelyn we’d talk again about the divorce. I have to leave for the evening.”
“Are you really divorcing her?”
“Yeah.”
“And you’ll give her everything she wants and let her go?”
“That’s right.”
“Even the research lab?”
“Even that.”
Ah.
Yuria’s mouth opened and closed like a fish gasping for air.
The Jeremiah family’s magic crystal engineering research lab.
The profits were greater than most fiefdoms. Depending on how you used it, you could curry favor with the powerful—its value was limitless.
Would she really abandon all of that just to get a divorce?
“Thank you.”
Yuria felt as if everything was falling into place perfectly. After all, Evelyn had only married Zach for his background, right?
Now that he had reached the pinnacle of the sixth circle and the restrictions were gone, it had still been a marriage of convenience back then—pulling the shackles off her as a commoner and accepting support from Zach.
If Zach divorced her and handed over the directorship of the lab, Evelyn would consider that a satisfying outcome.
“I’ll be back soon.”
Zach sent him away with a light heart.
#
As I walked home I replayed the events at the lab.
Evelyn had cried.
Black hair. Black eyes. Everyone said she had a vicious temper and that even though she was a commoner she had no manners.
Her pride in magic made her arrogant; some people even called her a demon.
She was crying?
And she even seemed reluctant to divorce.
Why?
I couldn’t understand. She had only married me for my background. Yet now she said she would leave everything behind if I asked. Why did she refuse?
I shook my head.
Even someone with an iron heart like Evelyn couldn’t stay perfectly cold.
By now enough time had passed. When I got home Evelyn would be waiting, calm and clear-headed.
We could talk now.
I returned home.
“You’re late.”
Evelyn had been waiting for me, but something felt off.
Sniff.
For the first time I caught her scent—perfume.
The scent was strong. She had sprayed whatever amount she felt like. Peach and wood notes stabbed into my nose.
“Eh...”
She had even applied makeup. During magic school she had walked around without a trace of it—even at balls. Now her face was painted.
Her skill was lacking.
It looked slapped on. The eyeliner on both sides was uneven. When she talked her lips parted and lipstick smeared on her teeth.
Girls often sneaked their mothers’ makeup and played with it. Evelyn was exactly like that.
She hadn’t done it to look beautiful. She had just used it.
But she was still beautiful.
Of course. She had always been.
“How is it?”
Evelyn spoke without a subject, but it was clear she wanted my opinion. She wanted to know how my civilian skills were.
No matter how she looked, she would have said she was pretty if this were any other day.
But saying it outright here was extremely stupid. Anyone with sense could tell. She had done this makeup so it would look good on me.
“Did you see the mirror?”
“Of course I did. What do you think?”
“It would have been better if you hadn’t done it at all.”