Prologue: Clocking Out of Life
On the way out of the office, the sky hung low.
A muggy, gray day that screamed rain.
The strap of my bag dug into my shoulder, heavier than usual.
Yet strangely, my steps felt light.
Just a little. A sense of liberation I'd never known in my life dangled from my toes.
Just this morning, I'd been drowning in the swamp of miscellaneous tasks under the guise of the planning team.
Then, around lunchtime, HR called me in.
"You are hereby notified that you are selected for layoff."
Shock? Sorrow?
Nothing like that.
I just thought the manager's voice droned on too long explaining the situation.
Frowning with exhaustion etched deep into my face, I half-opened my eyes and replied.
"......Yes, got it."
The manager seemed thrown off by my utterly indifferent—bordering on annoyed—response.
But he had no idea.
That I'd been broken for a long time already.
The office had never once been the meaning of life to me.
Just a swamp I'd dipped my feet into under the pretext of survival.
A sticky daily grind that pulled me deeper the more I waded in.
And now, finally, my feet were free.
On the bus ride home.
Gazing at the gray buildings flashing by the foggy window, I thought of the word "peace" for the first time.
No more alarm clocks starting tomorrow.
That thought alone made the day worthwhile.
The moment I got home, I slammed the front door shut.
Kicked off my shoes haphazardly, didn't bother with the bag or coat, and shuffled straight to bed.
Thud.
The springs welcomed my body with a satisfying give.
A fall like sinking into water. I loved this feeling of gravity taking full control.
I let the tension drain from my fingertips.
Exhaled the deep-seated fatigue from my lungs.
The stained ceiling looked farther away than ever today.
"...I don't wanna do anything."
A heartfelt truth I hadn't voiced in ages.
Anyone who heard might've scoffed.
But this room was empty right now.
No family, no friends, no lover.
I'd always been thoroughly alone, and that was a relief.
No one to disappoint with such pathetic thoughts.
I closed my eyes.
Slowly, so slowly, my body melted into the bed.
A strange buoyancy—not heavy, not light.
Thoughts scattered like mist,
sensations submerged below the surface,
body heat cooling from the tips of my limbs.
When even the muscles for breathing refused to move.
I had one last thought.
Ah... do I really have to breathe?
That was the end.
The moment I, the entity called "me," clocked out from the stage known as the world.