I Have Sex, Therefore I Am
I have sex. Therefore I am.
“Seo Narae. Mind if I use your pussy for a bit?”
I toss the words at my childhood friend as she lies on the bed, eyes locked on her iPad.
“I’m in the middle of an assignment, so just fuck me from behind however you want.”
Looking thoroughly annoyed, she casually spreads her legs and peels off both her shorts and panties in one motion, tossing them aside.
The way she offers up her pussy so obediently, without the slightest real resistance, actually makes me feel a flicker of resistance. It’s like I’ve somehow acquired a convenient onahole.
How the hell did things end up like this?
Even when I try to trace it back, I can’t quite remember the cause. I simply came to my senses one day and found Seo Narae spreading her pussy for me.
It’s a good thing, sure—but the fact that my childhood friend’s sense of chastity got warped because of me is something I probably ought to reflect on.
“What are you doing? Aren’t you putting it in?”
“…Yeah, I should put it in.”
Unable to hold back at the way she wiggles her ass as if goading me, I yank my pants down and immediately thrust my cock inside.
Narae’s body is just too goddamn hot to waste time fretting over every little detail.
I’ve been hypersexual ever since I was a kid.
I used to flip up my childhood friends’ skirts just to peek at their panties, or barge into the bath under the excuse that our houses were close…
Of course, as I grew older I started observing some kind of line, but my sex drive only kept swelling day after day.
“Haa…”
At some point I found myself staring at the towering mountain of porn stacked on my computer and letting out a long, heavy sigh.
How much cum have I pumped out using this ark as my side dish? And yet the fact that I’ve still never had sex even once hits me like a full-force reality check.
No way. A reality check for someone like me?
For reference, a man as thoroughly trained in the art of jacking off as I am can go three rounds in a row without ever tasting post-nut clarity.
But when the miserable reality itself leaves you disappointed, there’s nothing left to do—
After discharge I dropped out of the university I’d been attending, and on top of that I have no real source of income. The only work I do is helping out at the convenience store run by my childhood friend’s father.
As you can see, I basically never even get the chance to meet women, so naturally my dream of losing my virginity only drifts further away. Same-sex friends? I don’t even have those, let alone girlfriends.
“Isn’t there some cute girl out there who’d spread her pussy for me if I just asked?”
I inflate the absurd fantasy even I find ridiculous and casually stroke my crotch.
No matter how desperate I get, I have zero intention of breaking the law—but having a giant cock and spending every day just jacking off is such a waste, isn’t it?
That’s why I’m craving a girl who would put out easily, the kind who walks straight out of a dating sim.
To put it bluntly, I want a high-quality personal onahole. A meat toilet whose tits, pussy, and ass I can do whatever I want with.
“If I ask, she’ll spread… wait a second?”
In that instant a stroke of pure genius flashes through my mind.
I do have them, after all. Friends whose chromosomes are XX.
Even if they don’t look like women to me, they’ve got pussies. If I bow my head and beg, they might just put out.
Of course it won’t go as far as the meat-toilet fantasy I was spinning a second ago, but there’s a decent chance they’ll at least let me get some.
Strike while the iron is hot—or in this case, the cock. Following the old saying, I immediately pull out my phone and fire off messages to the girls.
Childhood friends.
Friends you’ve been close with, running around together since before you even came of age.
In dating sims and erotic doujinshi they always appear as a staple trope, established as their own full-fledged category of heroine.
I have no fewer than four such childhood friends. And every last one of them is a girl.
“Seriously. I’m dying under assignments—why the hell did you call us?”
“I’ve got a video I need to edit and upload today, so wrap this up quick~”
“Don’t be like that. Thanks to Yoo Sun we all got to meet up after so long.”
“Yes. I’m really happy Oppa called us over for once.”
Seo Narae and Jin Dalae, same age as me; Lee Seolah-noona, a year older; and Shin Areum, a year younger.
Living in the same apartment complex is the only reason our relationship has continued unbroken from childhood all the way to now.
Since we’ve already seen everything there is to see with these girls, I called them over expecting that if things went well they might even let me have sex…
Is this really something I can ask for?
But when I actually face them, the words stick in my throat.
It’s not that I’m scared of the fallout. I have absolutely zero worry that any of them would sue me for sexual harassment.
Yeah. If I have to put a finger on it, I just can’t picture the scene of sticking my cock into my childhood friends’ pussies.
We’re too familiar. I don’t think I’d even get hard.
I’ve deliberately avoided every work where childhood friends are the heroines.
It’s not that I see them as romantic interests, but the awkward atmosphere after doing the deed wouldn’t feel great.
…No need to get hung up on the little things at this point.
My deliberation is surprisingly short. The desire to see real pussy is simply far greater.
“So? Why exactly did you gather us all here?”
Seo Narae presses me, who’d been lost in thought for a moment.
Her tone is pure “quit stalling and get to the point.” Since she clearly looks busy with assignments, I decide to cut straight to the chase.
“Can you all have sex with me?”
The air in the room freezes solid in an instant.
“S-Se-se-se-sex…!”
The first to react is Seolah-noona. With zero immunity to this kind of topic, her face flushes scarlet as she gets hugely agitated—an absolute spectacle.
“Haa, I was wondering what kind of talk you’d spring on us out of nowhere…”
“Well. Even I didn’t expect you’d come in with such a straight pitch.”
“Isn’t it fine? Being manly is a good thing, you know?”
I guess even rotten they’re still childhood friends. The other three seem to have more or less anticipated I’d make a dirty request.
“I thought you’d calmed down a bit lately, but you really called all four of us just because you want to have sex once? Did you want a five-way or something?”
“No. I figured if even one of the four bites, that’d be good enough.”
“Your thinking is pure garbage… Anyway, with that kind of mindset no one will take you seriously, so why not just give up and find a girlfriend?”
“Heh.”
So I have to give up on losing my virginity after all? I bet everything on the last possibility left to me.
But it seems even the gods haven’t abandoned me, because a lifeline suddenly drops from the sky.
“Oh my. I don’t particularly mind having sex with Oppa, though?”
“Haaa?!”
Narae whirls on her with a loud cry at Areum’s shocking line.
“Are you serious?! It’s sex with this guy, you know? Putting his cock into your pussy, you know?!”
“C-Cock…”
Seolah-noona looks even more shaken by the vulgar wording that slipped out in Narae’s fluster.
“Yes. If it’s Yoo Sun-oppa and not someone else, as much as you want.”
Areum accepts my outrageous proposal with a gentle smile, and I almost tear up from both ends unbidden.
“Hmm. I don’t really mind either? It’s not like our pussies will stick together or anything.”
Dalae even jumps on the bandwagon, drifting closer and showing open interest.
“Dalae, you too… Why is everyone’s sense of chastity so light?”
“Rather than light, I’m simply interested in sex. I’ve wanted to try it at least once myself~”
As she says it she slyly caresses my crotch, face turning unexpectedly seductive.
Her tone is as gentle and unhurried as always, but her actions are anything but.
Even if her frame is tiny, the places that should stick out definitely do. And her personality’s a lot like mine.
Being an erotic-loving otaku hikikomori even though she’s a girl means our sexual tastes line up, and that seems to have worked in my favor.
“E-Everyone’s so bold… I still don’t really know about that kind of thing.”
Seolah-noona doesn’t look thrilled, but she doesn’t strongly stop them either.
For the moment everyone seems busy, so they say they’ll head back; after making a promise to talk again later, we disband.
The reaction was surprisingly good.
Narae and Seolah-noona aside, the other two who are already favorable toward me accepted it pretty positively. At this rate, losing my virginity really might not be a dream.
Especially Areum—it feels like she’d obediently go along with whatever play I suggest. Should I study up on what to make her do while I have the chance?
Rustle—
“?”
I was about to use a childhood-friend doujinshi as a side dish and jack off in celebration of sex being right around the corner when I suddenly sense a presence from the living room.
What? Did someone not leave yet?
When I step out of my room I find Seo Narae awkwardly pacing around the entrance.
I thought everyone had already gone home, but wondering if she still had something left to do, I ask—
“…If I leave you like this, you’ll just go and do dirty stuff with Areum on your own. She’s still young.”
“Young? She’s only a year younger.”
Areum was born in January to begin with, so she doesn’t give off that much of a younger impression. As a proper adult her height and breasts are the biggest of the four.
“But you’re not worried about Dalae?”
“She’s fine. Leave her alone and she’ll handle herself.”
I find the difference in treatment a little sad, even though they’re the same childhood friends.
“Anyway, I’m worried you’ll go and impregnate the others behind my back. Your sex drive is ridiculously strong.”
“Ah… Now that you mention it, pregnancy is dangerous, huh?”
As expected of the childhood friend I’ve known the longest, she knows me best. If I ever get overcome by lust and raw-dog them on their ovulation day with a creampie, I wouldn’t be able to face their parents.
“Ugh, seriously! Sit down over there!”
Narae clutches her head in thought for a moment, then blushes and barks the order.
“What? What are you going to do?”
“Just hurry up and sit! I can’t give you sex, but I’ll—you know—get you off with my hand…”
A line straight out of an eroge: she can’t give me sex, so satisfy myself with a handjob instead.
…I thought I wouldn’t get hard for a childhood friend, but it turns out it works surprisingly well.