Chapter 512: Childhood Friend (6)
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 512: Childhood Friend (6)
Your early twenties are clumsy in many ways.
You’re old enough to be called an adult, but you’ve only just taken your first steps.
That’s because the majority of these new adults still can’t stand completely on their own.
They haven’t achieved financial independence, nor have they achieved mental independence.
Turning twenty doesn’t mean you can suddenly handle everything on your own. It’s the stage where you begin to step away from your parents’ care, learning to become that person.
That’s why it’s clumsy and awkward.
Because you now have to do with your own hands the things your parents always did for you as if it were a matter of course.
Since it’s your first time, you’re bound to be crude and full of flaws.
What can a chick that’s just left its mother’s warmth to become a chicken really do?
Twenty-one years old.
Yoon Si-hoo’s plan for a confession, not much different from that of a twenty-year-old, was just as clumsy.
‘Oh, what do I do?!’
A sudden surge of courage had made him ask her to meet up with the intention of confessing, but he had nothing prepared.
He didn’t even have much money.
The signing bonus he received as a guild trainee had long been spent on equipment.
Regret washed over him like a tide.
‘Why the hell did I just blurt that out so recklessly! Aaargh!’
He cursed his past self with a silent scream for a moment.
‘This is no time for that.’
There was no use crying over spilled milk.
He didn’t have time for regrets.
All he could do now was present the best he could manage.
‘Right. Sunbae-nim always says this, doesn’t he? You can’t expect to be full after the first bite.’
It was one of the phrases Kim Do-jin constantly repeated while teaching Yoon Si-hoo and Jin Ha-rin.
He used to say it to chastise Si-hoo whenever he grew impatient with himself for needing hundreds of attempts to master something, unlike Jin Ha-rin, who could perfect it in just one or two tries.
‘The confession is just the first step.’
A step toward spending the rest of his life in a new kind of relationship with the woman he’d spent almost his entire life with.
There would be plenty of time later to show her his heartfelt affection in grander ways.
‘Instead of overdoing it, I’ll focus on conveying my feelings.’
Barely managing to rein in his chaotic thoughts, he left the lodging where he’d stayed for three days and two nights and headed to the entrance of the Association.
There, Jin Ha-rin was already waiting, having quickly packed her things while he was agonizing over his decision.
Seeing her standing there so elegantly amidst the crowd made his face flush.
‘She’s so beautiful.’
He was struck anew by her beauty.
A beauty so overwhelming it was almost violent, forcibly capturing the gazes of every man around.
She was beautiful from every angle, and her charm changed with every expression.
Without realizing it, Yoon Si-hoo raised his voice more than necessary.
“Ha-rin!”
Her gaze turned toward him.
The stares of the men around her that followed felt like sharp needles pricking his entire body.
A sense of superiority he’d never felt before seeped into his chest.
Suppressing the urge to shout, ‘This woman is mine,’ he walked toward her.
“Sorry, have you been waiting long?”
“No.”
Jin Ha-rin shook her head.
Her gaze, clearly uncomfortable, scanned their surroundings.
“…Let’s just go somewhere. This is a little overwhelming.”
“Yeah, let’s.”
Yoon Si-hoo took a step forward to push through the dense crowd.
His steps were filled with a new energy, making his earlier worries seem distant.
That was because a pretty good idea had come to him on the way here.
“Are you hungry?”
“Yeah, a little.”
“Is there anything in particular you want to eat…?”
Yoon Si-hoo asked cautiously.
Reading his expression, she shook her head.
“Not really. Anything’s fine.”
“Really? Then… I have a place in mind. Let’s go there.”
“Okay.”
Just then, they hailed a taxi approaching in the distance and headed toward their neighborhood.
After getting out of the taxi and walking a short distance, they arrived at an old, shabby snack bar.
Upon arriving, Jin Ha-rin’s eyes scanned the walls, which were covered in graffiti.
“This place is….”
“You remember, right? We used to come here all the time.”
“…We did.”
It was the snack bar they often visited after school back in their elementary school days.
The one where Yoon Si-hoo would occasionally treat her with his saved-up allowance.
She remembered ordering a single serving of Jjajang Tteokbokki and eating it with relish, staining the corners of her mouth black.
The taste had been special, but…
‘It’s not exactly a fond memory.’
It wasn’t a memory she particularly wanted to recall.
“I suddenly thought of the tteokbokki here, so I came… Is it not good?”
Yoon Si-hoo asked cautiously, only after they had already arrived.
After much thought, the theme he had decided on for today was reminiscence.
“It’s fine. I thought of it sometimes, too.”
Her words brought an instant smile to his face.
“Ajumma! We'll have two servings of Jjajang Tteokbokki and an assorted tempura, please!”
He picked up a piece of the steaming hot Jjajang Tteokbokki with his fork and put it in his mouth.
The unique flavor of the jjajang sauce spread with every chew of the rice cake.
Yoon Si-hoo exclaimed in admiration.
“Wow… it tastes exactly the same as it used to.”
Jin Ha-rin countered with a hesitant expression.
“…Really? I think it tastes a little different.”
“Huh? No way. It’s exactly the same as before. It’s amazing!”
Seeing Yoon Si-hoo answer with such a confident tone, Jin Ha-rin realized.
It wasn’t the taste of the tteokbokki that had changed, but her.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Starting with the snack bar from their elementary school days, they began a journey through memories buried deep in their hearts.
After that, they wandered from place to place, following the remnants of memories scattered throughout their neighborhood.
The karaoke room where they sometimes went to relieve stress.
The playground where they often played with friends.
And finally, the park at night.
“You remember this place, right? The park you always came to whenever you were upset.”
“How could I forget?”
Whenever something upset her, she would come to this park.
There was no special reason. She just wanted to be alone to sort through her emotions, and this was the only place she could do that.
Just as she was calming down and about to head home, Yoon Si-hoo would show up as if he’d been waiting.
-“Feeling better now? Let’s go home.”
Then, she would go home, holding the hand of a boy who was drenched in sweat from running all the way here, as if in a great hurry.
“You know, I used to get so anxious back then.”
“…About what?”
“That you wouldn’t be here. That’s why I always ran. I could only relax after I confirmed you were here.”
“I see.”
It was the first time she’d heard this. To think the reason he had run so hard was because of anxiety.
Sitting on the park bench where she always used to calm her anger, he looked up at the sky and poured out his heart.
“Honestly, I hated it when you came here.”
“Why?”
“Because I wanted you to tell me when something was wrong, to lean on me.”
A shy confession.
“Every time I saw you sitting here alone from a distance, Ha-rin, I was reminded of my own weakness.”
He wasn’t angry at her for not being able to lean on him, but at himself.
“I thought it was because I wasn’t reliable enough, because I wasn’t strong enough for you to lean on.”
“That’s… not it.”
“Yeah, I know. I’m just saying that’s how I felt.”
So every time he held out his hand with a forced smile on his sweat-drenched face, he made a promise to himself.
To become stronger.
To become a more dependable person.
“To confess to you… only after I’d earned the minimum qualifications.”
“……!”
Jin Ha-rin’s eyes widened.
Yoon Si-hoo stood up from the bench, walked over to her, and knelt on one knee.
Then he took out a ring he had painstakingly chosen in a short amount of time at a jewelry store he’d slipped into earlier without her noticing.
A plain, ordinary gold ring with no special design.
“Ha-rin.”
Honestly, he didn’t know. He didn’t know if he, as he was now, could be a reliable pillar of support for her.
Wasn’t she still stronger, with him just constantly chasing after her?
But he had reached his limit. The title of ‘childhood friend’ could no longer contain the feelings that grew with each passing year.
He just had to try harder.
Hadn’t Kim Do-jin said it?
That he had the potential to become much stronger.
That he was looking forward to his future.
Because he believed in him, and in himself.
He took the feelings he had cherished for over ten years, packed them tightly, and let them out.
“Go out with me. I’ll be your pillar of support for the rest of our lives.”
No.
“I want to be.”
The end of a long, one-sided love.
“I’m sorry. I don’t think I can accept your feelings.”
The end was rejection.
* * *
I realize the world has gotten a lot more comfortable.
“Sunbae-niiim.”
A junior telling his senior to come out.
And at this late hour, close to midnight.
“I got rejected todaaay!”
Even after chugging down drinks.
If this isn’t a great world, what is?
Back in my day, I couldn’t even imagine something like this.
Anyway, the gist of it is as above.
“Aigoo… yeah, that must have hurt.”
He says he poured his heart out to his childhood friend and got shot down hard.
No, wait.
Isn’t saying he was ‘rejected’ a bit of a misnomer?
“Uh… cheer up. You said it wasn’t a complete rejection.”
“Yeeeah, that’s what she saaaid.”
“Think about it carefully, Si-hoo.”
“About whaaat….”
“What did Ha-rin say when she turned you down?”
“She said she’s not in the mood for a relationship right now….”
“Right, that’s it.”
The key part of her rejection is ‘not in the mood for a relationship right now.’
And what does that mean?
“In other words, it means she doesn’t dislike your confession, but she can’t accept it due to her current circumstances. Isn’t that it?”
“Huh… does it really mean thaaat?”
“Of course, you punk.”
The kid, who had been on the verge of tears with a beet-red face, asks in a hopeful tone.
“Then does that mean… I still have a chance, Sunbae-nim?!”
I give the kid a grin and a nod.
“Of course, you punk.”
Because I was the one who asked Ha-rin to give him that flimsy piece of hope.