Chapter 102: The Meeting (2)
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 102: The Meeting (2)
The ajumma sat across from me while I ate.
It seemed my recent complaints about how lonely and boring it was to eat by myself had finally gotten through to her.
The mood wasn't bad as I ate.
We didn't exactly have a cheerful conversation, but she placed side dishes on my spoon and did everything she used to.
The fact that this simple act, which had ceased just yesterday, had returned must mean her mood had softened, right?
I slowly approached the ajumma as she carried the empty plates to the sink and began washing the dishes.
“Ajumma.”
“Yes…?”
As the ajumma, who had been focused on the dishes, slowly turned her head, I reached out my arms.
My left hand rested lightly around her shoulder and neck, while my right hand slipped inside to wrap around her stomach and waist.
I felt her body flinch at the sudden physical contact, the shudder traveling up my arm.
“Hey, hey…!”
The startled ajumma struggled, but it wasn't a very forceful resistance.
If she had truly wanted to push me away, her actions would have been much more decisive.
I held her in my arms for a while without a word.
“Ssssp.”
Every time I took a deep breath, a deep, rich fragrance flooded my nostrils.
It was hard to describe.
It wasn't exactly a specific fruit or flower, but rather a scent created by the unique mixture of the ajumma’s own skin.
The body that had been trembling in fits and starts gradually began to calm down.
I could tell just by the way she resumed the dishwashing she had paused.
Her acceptance of the physical contact meant the atmosphere had eased that much.
Of course, I still hadn't found the reason for her brief cold spell, so the rift wasn't fully mended, but in this atmosphere, I could probably get her to talk again.
“Ajumma.”
“…Yes.”
Her voice was slightly subdued, her face flushed.
It seemed she had a vague idea of what I was about to say.
“Can you tell me now?”
“Tell you what…?”
“The reason you’ve been so cold for the past few days.”
Her hand, which had been lathering a plate with white foam, froze for a moment.
Then, as if nothing had happened, she resumed washing the dishes, trying her best to feign composure.
“I’ve been the same as always… Don’t you think you might be mistaken, Do-jin?”
People try their best to avoid situations they find difficult to escape.
And only when they are finally cornered do they bring out the stories they’ve hidden away.
I pulled the ajumma into a tighter embrace and spoke in a stronger tone.
“Tell me what it was about.”
“……”
The ajumma’s body trembled slightly before settling down.
The first words she finally uttered were rather unexpected.
“Promise me.”
“I promise.”
I had no idea what it was, but I promised first.
She wasn't the type to make an unreasonable demand, nor would she say anything that would put me at a disadvantage.
At that, the ajumma looked back at me with a slightly dumbfounded expression.
“…I haven’t said anything yet.”
“Because I trust you.”
“You really are…”
Shaking her head with a gentle smile, as if to say I was impossible, the ajumma seemed to have fallen for my strategy of securing a promise first.
“Promise me… that you won’t laugh at what I’m about to say.”
What on earth could it be that she was this embarrassed?
“I promise.”
I readily accepted the promise once more.
“That… do you remember the weekend two weeks ago?”
“The weekend two weeks ago…”
“Not Saturday, Sunday.”
“Ah.”
There was no way I could forget.
That was the day I had a date with Yoon Ji-an.
The moment the ajumma pinpointed that day, the puzzle pieces in my head began to click into place.
“I happened to see you then. You, Do-jin… getting into a car with a woman.”
My guess was right.
How could I not have known?
It was an answer I could have easily figured out if I had just thought a little deeper.
Her phone call back then had been unnatural from the start.
Suddenly calling me at midnight, insisting that I had to sleep at home and telling me to come quickly, then waiting for me on the outdoor bench at that hour just to hand me a container of side dishes.
It was all because of that.
“Honestly, I was confused. It’s much more natural for you to be seeing a woman your own age, but… I know it was foolish, but I couldn't help getting angry.”
The ajumma continued, a pitiful smile on her face.
“But at the same time, I had another thought.”
“What thought was that?”
“About the two of us… I thought, maybe now is the right time to stop.”
It seemed she had even considered breaking up.
There are countless obstacles between us.
The societal perception of our age gap would be a problem, and the fact that she’s a married woman is another hurdle.
And then there’s Shin Yu-jeong, my friend…
Ah, is that actually an advantage?
Anyway.
One thing was certain: the ajumma’s mind must have been a complicated mess for the past few days.
And our relationship was in an incredibly ambiguous state.
The word that best described the relationship between the ajumma and me right now was probably ‘playing with fire.’
The only thing that had progressed radically was our physical relationship; our emotional connection hadn't caught up, so it was hard to find a more fitting expression.
And this was all my fault.
“Ajumma.”
“Yes.”
I turned on the faucet that had been shut off and thoroughly rinsed the foam from the ajumma’s hands.
Then, I wrapped her hands in my clothes to dry them, and we faced each other.
A misunderstanding that wasn't quite a misunderstanding had formed.
Because our relationship was so shallow, I had made her feel insecure.
That was my fault, and that was the misunderstanding.
Maybe I felt that it had been wrong from the very beginning, from the moment we tied the knot.
Was the instability of a relationship built on layers of desire instead of a heartfelt story revealing itself like this?
No, that’s not it.
The process of two people becoming entangled doesn't stem from a single source.
Just as a relationship born from desire isn't necessarily wrong, one that starts with a heartfelt story isn't necessarily beautiful.
The problem was that I hadn't thought about how to cultivate the relationship we had formed.
“Um…”
It was so, so difficult to bring up the subject.
Because I still hadn't sorted out my own feelings.
I felt like I had been living my life expressing my desires in a very ambiguous way until now.
It was time to sort out my feelings more firmly.
The ajumma reached out and gently caressed my face.
“It’s okay. You can say whatever you need to.”
Her eyes held a look of resignation.
Was she mistaken in thinking that the words I was struggling to say were to announce our breakup?
I held the ajumma’s hand that was touching my cheek and answered with a smile.
“Since you told me to speak freely, I will.”
With my other hand, I wrapped it around her waist and pulled her into my arms.
Her flustered face drew closer.
“Let’s go all the way.”
“…Huh.”
With a cute gasp, the ajumma’s face froze.
I continued.
“I was never casual about this. From the moment I first laid a hand on you, I decided to see this through to the end with you.”
I’m going to live my life expressing even more of my desires from now on.
If there’s a woman I like, I’ll have sex with her as much as I want. I want to achieve the mother-daughter threesome with Shin Yu-jeong and the ajumma, and if it’s something I want to do and can do, I plan to do as much as possible.
But that doesn't mean I’m going to live irresponsibly.
Whatever happens as a result of my actions, I have to accept it with my whole being.
The same goes for the ajumma.
I know there are many walls that are hard to overcome, but I have no intention of giving up on her because of them.
And I have even less intention of making her suffer because of our relationship.
“When we had sex, I told you, didn't I?”
“…Huh?”
“That we were already too late.”
“Ah.”
We crossed the line a long time ago.
Even if we were to go back now, it would be impossible to live the same lives we did before.
That’s true for me, at the very least.
Even if, by some chance, I could get Son Si-woo’s body back, could I live like I did then?
Suppressing everything, enduring, restraining myself?
Absolutely impossible.
Isn't there a saying?
They say that once a monk tastes meat, not a single bedbug will be left in the temple.
The ajumma and I have both already had a taste.
Of how hot our bodies are, and how they react and burn for each other.
I can’t give up that body.
“From now on, don’t even think about distancing yourself from me, or that you should stop here.”
“……”
At my almost command-like tone, the ajumma’s eyes glazed over slightly.
A hazy gaze, but her mind, not yet completely lost, gathered itself to ask me.
“What do you want from an old woman, a married one at that?”
“Everything.”
I answered immediately.
“Ajumma… no, I want you to give me your everything.”
Our relationship must undergo countless changes from now on.
The easiest of those to change is what we call each other.
Because the title ‘ajumma’ makes me seem like an unreliable child.
To move forward as more equal partners, we have to be radical.
“I’ll promise you this one thing.”
At my informal speech, the ajumma’s… no, Seo Jeong-hee’s eyes grew as wide as lanterns.
“Do-jin, you…?”
Fortunately, she didn't seem angry.
She looked more surprised by the sudden drop in formality.
I paid no mind to her reaction and continued.
“From beginning to end. For every moment you’re with me, I promise you will never suffer.”
Perhaps there might be difficult times now and then.
If she finds out about another woman, or if she learns that I’m thinking about a mother-daughter threesome, well…
Still, I will find an answer.
I always have, and I always will.
So.
“Let’s go all the way together, Jeong-hee.”