Confessions of the Quirkless
"What I was trying to tell you was, 'We're about to hit third year too. How about you, Mitchan? We've only got eleven months left until we graduate from Orudera Middle School, but it doesn't really feel real to me.'"
"…"
"A-Anyway, it looks like winter's finally winding down. The cold winds have stopped blowing, and cherry blossoms are blooming on the trees."
"…"
"Oh, speaking of which, did you hear about that incident this morning? A massive villain showed up right in the middle of downtown! Death Zero and Shinrin Kamui were facing off against it when suddenly this hero I'd never seen before appeared! Her name's Mt. Lady—"
It had already been thirty minutes. Ever since we left school together, Midoriya hadn't shut up for a second. I'd considered responding at one point, but I didn't want to drag out the conversation, so I was just ignoring him until he ran out of steam.
I shouldn't have agreed to walk with him in the first place. But heading straight home wasn't an option, and I didn't have anywhere else to go, so wandering around like this was actually better.
"…This feels kinda weird."
"?"
"You haven't talked to me once since we were kids, Mitchan. You've been avoiding me this whole time. Honestly, I was worried when you started drifting away. We're both quirkless, after all—"
"You pitying me?"
"N-No! That's not it. I just… hadn't heard from you in a while. You were so quiet at school, like you were in a completely different world even though we were in the same class. So… I started wondering if your parents were still putting pressure on you—"
Thud.
The moment we passed under the underpass, my feet stopped dead.
"Mitchan? Wh-Why—"
"You think you know more about my parents than I do?"
"N-No, that's not…"
"If you don't know, then keep it out of your mouth. Midoriya, why do you always have to cross the line?"
"I crossed the line?"
"It's not wrong, is it? You always butt into other people's business without a second thought, no matter what they want."
"…So that's why you've been keeping your distance?"
"Hah—"
Midoriya's words drew a sigh out of me before I could stop it.
"Don't go prying into every little thing like that. Half the time I talk to you, I have no idea what you're even getting at."
"…Got it. I'll tone it down."
Midoriya fell silent after that. An awkward quiet stretched on for about fourteen seconds. But he was the one who broke it again.
"Mitchan, can I ask you something—"
"You've been calling me Mitchan nonstop. Can you cut that weird nickname crap?"
"S-Sorry. Sakatsuki, earlier you asked me why I'm applying to U.A. High School even though I'm quirkless. I still haven't heard why you want to go there."
"Why do you care?"
"Truth is… when you said you were aiming for U.A., I felt a little relieved."
"What?"
"Honestly… it's kinda stupid, right? A quirkless guy applying to the Hero Course at U.A. Even Kacchan said it'd be better to hope for a quirk in your next life and jump off the roof if you wanna be a hero. Haha…"
He's forcing that smile again.
"I know. I know it won't happen anyway. But I still wanna be a hero. So I decided not to care what anyone says. Just grit my teeth, look straight ahead, and charge forward. But still, I couldn't shake the anxiety."
"So what're you trying to say? What's the point of dumping this on me?"
"…Beats me. I don't even know why I'm saying this. I just… wanted to hear it from you, Sakatsuki. Whether a guy like me could be a hero too."
Midoriya finished speaking and stared straight into my eyes, waiting for an answer. But his pupils were trembling. His grip on his notebook was white-knuckled too. It felt like he—a guy with no hero potential or quirk—was recklessly asking me, of all people, what decision he should make.
So I couldn't bring myself to speak easily. As much as I hated to admit it, I was wrestling with the exact same doubts. That's what pissed me off.
"What am I, your life coach? Figure that shit out yourself."
"…"
I could see the fight drain out of Midoriya at my response. His eyes were lifeless, but he was still forcing that smile.
"Sorry. That was a dumb question."
Dumb… Yeah, not wrong. We both knew trying was pointless, but here we were making idiotic choices anyway. Fifteen years old, still lost in dreamland, what a waste of time.
And yet, I got it. I felt a pang of empathy for Midoriya. The moment I realized we were in the same boat, a sense of kinship hit me. So—
I opened my mouth to make him a dangerous offer.
"You saw what my home life's like when we were kids, right? You know the gist."
"S-Sakatsuki? You just said not to cross the line—"
"I'm the one talking about it, so it's fine."
"…Yeah, I know."
"Just like you worried. The second I mentioned the Hero Course, Dad hurled stuff at me while cursing up a storm, and Mom screamed herself hoarse trying to stop me. She even called our homeroom teacher to sabotage it."
"…I had no idea."
"I'm applying to U.A. anyway. And if I fail, I'll give up. Might as well crash and burn miserably, feels better that way."
"Miserable… failure?"
"That's reality, isn't it? You know damn well you're gonna flop too. Sit in your room crying about it? Nah, that's worse. You think you're the only one desperate to be a hero? I've chased that dream for ten years straight."
"…Sakatsuki."
"But everyone bitches that it won't happen. Even my own parents are against it. And deep down, I know I'll bomb it. Doesn't mean I can just toss everything I've built so far. Too precious to waste. So yeah, I'll flail around like an idiot. Then, I'll quit."
Silence fell. Then I saw it, life sparking back into Midoriya's eyes.
"Like you said, Sakatsuki… maybe that's what I should do too?"
His voice had strength now, no more fake smile.
"Better a miserable failure than doing nothing."
His slumped shoulders straightened just a fraction.
"Flail around like an idiot."
For the first time, he looked hopeful. Clutching his notebook to his chest like he'd made a vow, he said to me:
"Sakatsuki… thanks. I'll remember that. For real."
The second I saw that, I swallowed the words I'd been about to say. No, I absolutely couldn't tell him. This wasn't what I wanted. The kinship I'd felt vanished. Fundamentally, our problems were different. So, Midoriya… I can't say it. What I'd meant to tell you was… if we both fail U.A.—
"…?!"
Huh? Midoriya's face twisted in sudden horror. Then he shoved me, hard?
"Mitchan! Look out!!!"
Wham—
"Ugh—!"
My head slammed into the wall. Pain exploded through my skull. He'd pushed way harder than I expected, I blacked out for a second.
But it was brief. My vision cleared bit by bit. And in the blurry haze, I saw it.
Something black and thick, amorphous and sticky like liquid, it was wrapping around Midoriya?!
"What's this? Sacrificing himself to save his friend? Touching. But whatever. This body's perfect, an M Size Hideout! Sorry, buddy… I'll take good care of your friend."