Restoration (Revised Edition)
Recently, I've been failing to keep the promise Dad and Mom made to me quite often.
It's a fact.
And the disappointment it causes is a fact too.
But.
If someone asks whether that makes me dislike Dad and Mom, I would.
"No."
I'd say no.
"Really?"
"Yeah, I'm really sure."
My parents have worried about this before, but my thoughts haven't changed then or now.
They work hard for our family, that's all.
But Dad's expression didn't soften even after hearing my words.
"...Actually, Dad has regretted it a lot."
"Huh?"
"I heard that if Siwoo or Mom didn't come to pick me up, he was extremely disappointed."
"......"
"After hearing that, my hair turned white. It felt like I was chasing work and only causing wounds to Siwoo, so it was really sorry."
"I'm... okay though..."
"If you say that, I'm really grateful, but... Dad did wrong. Siwoo, can you tell what Dad is working hard for...?"
"Umm... eating delicious things... wearing nice clothes... playing around?"
"Exactly, then what will happen?"
"......Happiness?"
"Exactly, it's our family's happiness. But Dad should have worked to make Siwoo happy from the start, yet somehow forgot that part and only worked for money."
"......"
"So Dad said he's wrong. He should have aimed for happiness, but somehow money came first."
"......"
"Ah... did it become too hard for Siwoo?"
"No..."
"Yeah..."
We stopped talking after that.
I wanted to say something to Dad, but nothing came to mind.
At that moment, the thought that popped into my head was.
-Hug.
"......!"
It was immediately hugging Dad back.
Since we were right in front of a traffic light, I just wrapped my arms around Dad.
The reason I did that was because Sia had told me.
'When reconciling, hugging is the best!'
Even when we were usually fine, whenever Sia or I got upset, we always hugged like that.
And after hugging, my heart strangely calmed down and returned to normal.
It felt amazing every time, but now it came to mind because of that incident.
Using my experience with Sia, I hugged Dad.
"......"
Dad didn't react much.
Thinking it was a failure because of the lack of reaction.
-Hug!
"......!"
Dad hugged me back too.
Dad's body when holding me and his two arms around my back felt warm.
And Dad slowly patted my back.
Even though there was no word with the patting, I felt like I could understand what Dad was saying without words.
We stood there for a long time like that.
Strange glances from people around us started to feel.
Because of those glances, I started to feel embarrassed and wanted to stop.
"Let's keep doing this a little longer."
Dad didn't think about letting me go.
"But... everyone can see us."
"Then...! This is perfect!"
"......!"
Dad lifted me up as is, crossed the empty sidewalk that turned green.
And.
"Son, can you be carried by Dad for the first time in a long time?"
"...Is it okay?"
"Then, it's okay."
"Let's do it!"
I was carried on Dad's back, resting my head on Dad's shoulder.
As we walked slowly.
"Son, can you tell me a fun story?"
"A fun story?"
"Not necessarily a fun story, it's fine. Like school life... or even just daily life stories."
"Umm... it's okay, why?"
"Just... Dad seems not to know well how our son lives."
"There's not much that's fun though..."
"It's fine, tell me."
"Okay."
I started telling stories while being carried on Dad's back.
Either the content of the subjects I'm learning recently, or the stories my teacher told in a fun way.
And most of all, the story I told the most was.
The stories about living with Sia.
Since we were together at school and even after school, there were so many stories to talk about.
Reading books together in the school library, sharing tteokbokki at the snack shop on the way home, or talking about the cookies I ate at Sia's house and my own experience making them myself.
Dad listened to my words quietly while walking.
I was talking without thinking, but because Dad didn't say anything, I started to wonder if I had done something wrong.
"Did I... do something wrong?"
"No... I was just listening to our son's story."
"Oh..."
"Yeah, but son, do you like playing with Sia?"
"With Sia...?"
"Yeah, more than just playing together in kindergarten, it's about whether there's a friend you can really have fun with."
"Umm... yeah...! I like it!"
"Really? Then I'm glad."
"Why?"
"Just... our son seems to have good luck with friends."
"What does that mean?"
"No. Then let's go back home, Mom must be waiting for dinner."
"Ah...! Yeah!"
When we arrived home.
Mom was busy setting the table.
"Mom?"
"Oh, you're back? Try this once."
"What is it?"
"Risotto?"
"...Yeah."
I felt a bit uneasy, but after eating the risotto Mom gave me.
"It's delicious."
"Really? I'm glad. Then wash your hands and eat."
"Yeah, okay."
"I'll just quickly shower and come out."
"Okay."
While washing my hands and sipping water for a moment, Dad came out from the bathroom.
"Let's eat."
"Yeah!"
Today, it felt like the whole family was eating dinner leisurely for the first time in a long time.
Before, even when eating dinner like this, we would eat quietly and quickly without words, but now we were eating while talking about what happened today and such.
While eating like this, it felt strangely amazing.
After finishing dinner, I prepared for bed and lay down.
-Creak.
"Siwoo, are you asleep?"
Mom entered the room.
"No? Not yet. What's up?"
"It's nothing, just wondering if our Siwoo sleeps well..."
"I'm not sleeping yet."
"Hehe... I see..."
Mom seemed to have something to say, so she sat quietly beside me.
"What's wrong?"
"Huh? It's nothing... just watching our son sleep like this feels rare lately. I sat for a bit."
"Ah... yeah..."
"Yeah... our son should sleep soon."
"Yeah, okay."
Mom stroked my forehead then.
-Kiss.
She lightly kissed my lips and left the room.
With the feeling I hadn't experienced in a long time, I could fall asleep right away.
※※※※※※
Late at night.
At the kitchen table, Seongyun and Minjeong sat with simple side dishes and wine, clinking glasses.
"Is Siwoo... asleep?"
"Yeah, I just checked."
Time had already passed midnight, but out of caution, we checked if Siwoo was asleep again and drank wine.
"...Tastes bitter..."
"It's wine."
"...Normally I don't drink this much."
Seongyun was swirling the wine glass in his hand and watching it spin.
Watching Seongyun like that, Minjeong cautiously started speaking.
"Does Siwoo... hate us a lot?"
"...No. Not at all."
"Really? You're not lying to me?"
"Of course not... how could I lie about this..."
"Yeah..."
"When I walked with Siwoo today, I asked subtly, but he didn't say that."
"......"
"Haa... how did we become like this..."
"Yeah..."
"I was working to make money to make Siwoo happy, but instead, it's because of that that Siwoo isn't happy..."
"...It's all my fault."
"Why is that your fault?"
"...Lately I've been running forward too much... I wonder if even Ji-eun called."
"......"
The moment we felt we were drifting a bit was thanks to Kim Jieun.
Kim Jieun, who had been watching Siwoo's reaction when we didn't come to pick him up or broke the promise, couldn't hold it in and called us.
She told us to take care of Siwoo.
Only then did the two of us realize.
Our mistake.
Because Siwoo acted mature, we unknowingly started paying less attention.
And now we thought Siwoo would understand and took it for granted.
Moreover, we didn't realize our own mistake, but someone else discovered it.
Seeing that, the two of us felt extremely ashamed.
"Haa... how did this happen..."
"Yeah... but I still think I'm not too late. We can fix it now, right?"
"That... but... Siwoo has been holding back until now... will it really become okay?"
"Of course."
"Yeah... it will be."
"Yeah... I should pay more attention to Siwoo too..."
"How about you paying more attention to the food?"
"...That doesn't seem to matter much right now."
Minjeong narrowed her eyes and glared at Seongyun.
"Why do you think there's none? Siwoo said the cookies and rice you made were delicious."
"...Really?"
"Yeah, I heard it on the way today."
"...Shocking."
"Well... you're not that bad at cooking... it's just that Ji-eun is good at it."
"......I should learn cooking from Ji-eun..."
"That's not bad."
"Really?"
"Yeah, and while at it, take Siwoo too and let him play with Sia. Siwoo likes living with Sia."
"Since we started living together in kindergarten, we're really close, huh."
"Yeah, probably. We're lucky, right?"
"Yeah... I don't want to imagine what if Sia wasn't there..."
The two of them briefly imagined what would happen without Sia's family and gulped down the wine.
Because the thought was too unpleasant to imagine.
"But how about us stacking memories with Siwoo?"
"How?"
"That... we have to think from now on..."
"...Sounds like a good idea. Since we haven't done well until now, we should do better from now."
"Yeah... let's do that."
The night for the two of them deepened like that.