Chapter 239
Chapter 239: Abyss of Memory (2)
The forest was an unknown forest, and the air too was of a density he had never breathed before.
A hologram floated before the boy's eyes. The same kind of system UI that Dong Bong-soo already knew.
[Loading of new map complete.]
"……"
The boy took one step forward.
Without stopping his feet, he began walking along the path that cut through the forest.
One step, two steps. With each step that followed, the forest changed. The trees changed and the angle of the light changed.
Like a film reel cutting and rejoining, there were black gaps between scenes and scenes, but the feet never stopped, and each time they crossed a gap, the boy's height had changed.
His shoulders broadened little by little, the baby fat left his face, and his stride also lengthened.
The forest became a mountain path, the mountain path became a field, and the field became a river again.
The rising and setting of the sun overlapped in rapid succession.
Then at some point, his nose turned cold.
The smell of grass mixed into the unfamiliar night air—the kind one can only catch on a path with no one on it. Because it was a sensation not his own, he could neither filter it out nor grow accustomed to it. Kim Rae-won's sense of smell simply settled at the tip of Dong Bong-soo's nose.
The same was true of all the other four senses. Though he could not commune with them, they were engraved like marks into Dong Bong-soo's consciousness as Kim Rae-won's.
And beyond the five senses, an unfamiliar sensation. No—should it be called an emotion.
'Is this what loneliness is?'
He doesn't know precisely. He has never felt it in his life.
The thing in the boy named Kim Rae-won associated with this smell. Emotion, feeling—whatever it was, he could only presume it was something of that sort.
But beneath the loneliness was something deeper.
The center of his chest was being pulled. His body was being drawn toward somewhere, but he didn't know the direction.
The desire to go back.
The reason this boy was walking was not wandering. It was searching for home. Searching for the road back.
Longing.
A sensation Dong Bong-soo did not possess. He could not process it. He didn't know where to categorize it, nor how to digest it. It simply pooled and settled in his chest.
The walking feet quickened.
Kim Rae-won, now an adult, was rushing toward someone. A sword was in the man's hand, blood splattered, and the villagers wept.
He saved them. He turned away. He walked again.
The same scene pressed in with a subtly different face layered over it. The saved village was eaten, torn, and violated by other men……
And more than that. The man whose life had been spared turned around and was doing the same thing. Each time, the man saved, and turned away, and walked on again.
No matter how many systemically heroic actions Kim Rae-won performed, the evil nature of people did not improve.
Yet even so, the feet did not stop. That was what lay at the foundation of the human being called Kim Rae-won.
And then those feet finally stopped.
For the first time.
It was a wide Training Grounds. There were parts that were blurry or filled with numbers where the data was incomplete here and there, but it was clearly a practice ground for martial artists.
From all directions, martial artists holding swords were looking up at one spot. Standing in the center was a man in a school uniform. His shoulders had broadened and he had grown taller, but his clothes were still a navy blazer. Bloodstains seeped here and there.
His skin was pressed down.
It was the weight of gazes. The eyes pouring from all directions bore down on his shoulders, and within them was not only hostility. A fair amount of awe was mixed in as well. That was the unfamiliar sensation. It was a sensation Dong Bong-soo knew quite well, but for Kim Rae-won, this weight seemed to be a first. Seeing how one side of his chest sank heavily.
'So this is the Orthodox Council Gathering.'
That name was already known from the archive's surface layer data. The irregular martial arts sparring tournament opened by the ten great sects of the Orthodox Path. At that place, this man received an epithet for the first time.
A heterogeneous power belonging to no system of Orthodox Path martial arts. The awe and wariness contained in the character for eccentric.
On the other side of the Training Grounds, two more stood with energy of a similar texture to his own. Their faces were not visible. But the intuition that they were the same kind poured in through Kim Rae-won's senses, and Dong Bong-soo experienced it exactly as it came.
The sensation that he might not be alone.
The two who had been standing on the other side came over to his side.
The color of the panorama changed. It was the most vivid stretch of all so far.
Even among the surface layer with a damage rate of only 12%, the light was particularly bright. The most intact fragment across all twenty-one years.
There were three sets of footsteps.
They were walking side by side. The stride and weight were different, but the speed was the same. Not steps being adjusted to match, but steps that had naturally matched.
The area near his shoulder grew warm.
There was no one beside him, yet his body temperature rose. Kim Rae-won's memory was conveying the physical sensation in full.
The temperature of the air that changes just from having someone beside you. An entirely different density of emotion from walking alone.
One of the sets of footsteps was weighty and unhurried.
"It's a pretty good day for a walk."
It was a meaningless remark. Talk about the weather. That remark was the most vividly preserved voice in this panorama. The brightest fragment across all twenty-one years was talk about the weather.
The name Ha Gyeong-un was in the surface layer data. The name Yeop Bi-hwa as well.
'So these, including Kim Rae-won, are what they call the Three Eccentrics.'
The three were walking side by side. There was no particular scene beyond the walking. Not fighting, not accomplishing anything. Just three people standing on the same road together.
Dong Bong-soo did not react.
He simply experienced the sensations as they poured in. But he could clearly tell that this stretch was different from the others. What was pouring in was not a cold chill or a twinge. Nor was it the longing that pulled from inside.
It was warmth.
There was no need to categorize what it was. It was sufficient to simply recognize that the area near his left shoulder was warm and that it was not his own.
The warmth in that part faded.
The footsteps that had been beside him grew distant one by one. Three became two, and two became one. Color began to drain from the panorama and……
He was alone again.
The repetition of chivalry being doubted or betrayed returned. It was the same pattern as before, but the quality was different. Not helplessness but resignation, and within the resignation was mixed resolve.
He knew that the system would not make him stronger. He also knew that no matter how much he searched, there were no other Karma Root Clan members. What remains after accepting the fact of being alone.
Even so, he must go.
Even alone, he must break through to the Floating Island.
A bitter taste spread through his mouth. What Kim Rae-won must have felt, Dong Bong-soo's tongue was experiencing. Yet the feet did not stop. They were the same feet as before, but the texture was different. At first they were feet searching for a path, then feet rushing in to save someone, then feet that had stopped once in the Training Grounds, then feet that walked three abreast, and now they were feet that kept going even without a path.
His chest was pulled again.
The sensation that had first poured in during the time of walking alone came a second time. It had deepened. Because it was something Dong Bong-soo did not possess, he still could not process it, could not digest it. It simply continued to pool.
The steps were quickening. Scenes overlapped and flashed past like thin sheets of paper.
And then the UI responded.
Kim Rae-won was using something. A scene of a skill being used. Light extended from his hands, but the scene itself was broken and what skill it was could not be seen.
[Prior user skill record detected—Restoration impossible]
The skill name was partially broken and the characters were smeared. He tried to read it but restoration was not possible.
『███'s ██ (Hero's █████)』
That the first characters were 'Hero' could be known from looking at the English portion. The latter part was black as if painted over with ink.
The scene was shattered. The before and after of the skill use were missing, with only the middle fragment remaining.
Kim Rae-won was kneeling.
It seemed to be immediately after a battle. His clothes were torn and soaked with blood, but his posture was not that of one who fights. Both knees on the ground, head slightly bowed, two hands folded over his chest.
'Praying……?'
Light gathered above his hands. It was light of the same lineage as Faith Arrow, but the form was entirely different. It did not extend outward like an arrow. It bloomed from his chest and wrapped around Kim Rae-won, and within that, light returned as if something were responding.
A structure of giving, and receiving back.
The texture of the light changed.
Kim Rae-won's lips were moving. He was speaking. The voice was not restored so it was impossible to hear what he was saying, but the shape of his lips was clearly a conversation. Not speaking to himself but addressing someone.
And before him.
The last fragment remaining just before the scene tore apart.
Within the light was a form.
The face was broken and could not be seen. But the posture was discernible. It was slightly bowing at the waist toward Kim Rae-won's side. The posture of someone listening.
Dong Bong-soo's consciousness stopped.
He tried to re-examine the meaning of this memory, but the scene shattered into pieces.
[Prior user skill data—Damage rate 89%]
[Restorable information: Classification [Advanced][Non-combat][Faith lineage] / Unlock condition—███]
Only the classification remained.
Advanced. Non-combat. Faith lineage.
He had simply managed to read some of it by momentarily connecting fragments of broken characters.
: When a hero sincerely ████, the goddess's ██ is—
Although most of the information was broken and could not be known, Dong Bong-soo was certain by instinct.
This information must be kept in memory.
While imprinting this section into his own consciousness.
Kim Rae-won's steps grew blurry. The feet became invisible. The panorama cracked to the point where it was impossible to tell whether he was walking or standing.
[Warning: Data integrity of the middle layer and below not guaranteed]
The vivid footstep sounds, the weather talk, the warmth near his chest—all of it receded beyond cracked glass.
The panorama of memory fractured.
Before he knew it, darkness had become the default.
How much time had passed like that?
If roughly estimated in reverse from Kim Rae-won's sensations, it was probably around three to four years.
Something struck from within the darkness.
Wind grazing the left cheek. The kind that remains after a blade has passed.
Immediately after, an impact on the right shoulder. The sensation of being shoved by someone.
Shouts pouring from behind. Not language. Fragments of syllables cut off before the meaning could be understood.
The ground split underfoot and the sky turned over and the smell of blood pricked the nose then vanished.
Right after, he was running on sand. No, he was falling from a cliff. No, was it underwater?
Fragments poured in. Without order, without context.
It was the deep layer of the archive. The world with a damage rate of 81%.
Almost nothing remained, but what did remain poured in simultaneously from all directions in an unorganized state. Trying to catch them caused them to shatter. The moment he reached out, they scattered like shards of glass, and only darkness remained in the scattered places.
Dong Bong-soo did not try to catch them. He let them brush past as they would.
Each time they struck and passed, Kim Rae-won's sensations flickered briefly and disappeared. Fear, anger, relief, deflation, wariness, pain. He could put names to the emotions, but he could not know what circumstances had given rise to them. Because the context was shattered. Only results without causes grazed across the surface of his consciousness.
In the midst of all that, one snagged.
It held out a little longer than the other fragments. A few seconds' worth of image remained before it fully shattered.
It was night. Kim Rae-won was face-down on the ground.
His breathing was ragged as if about to cut off and one arm was bent at an angle. The energy of the things standing before him was different from that of the Murim.
The texture of energy based on Spirit Roots.
'Cultivation Seekers.'
The sensation pouring from the back of the man being crushed under that energy was defeat.
He had been told that if he grew strong enough, he could ascend. That if he built his realm like the Cultivation Seekers, he could reach the Upper Realm. Yet those Cultivation Seekers were now standing on top of him. Those who knew the way back were standing on top of the one who wanted to go back.
……was still clinging to a hollow delusion.
Something heavy settled within Dong Bong-soo's ribcage and then disappeared.
It was an incomprehensible sensation.
If one is stepped on, one gets up, and if one is strong, one need not be stepped on. That is all. Yet this Kim Rae-won carries an overflow of sensory residue indicating that was not all for him. And besides, how could he know there would be a way back to Earth even if he reached the Upper Realm?
Dong Bong-soo let it pass without categorizing it.
The fragment shattered.
Darkness.
Color grazed.
It was the summit of a mountain. Kim Rae-won was looking up at the sky. The sky was different from usual. The color of the light was entirely unlike normal.
Through the clouds, something seemed to be…… visible……
It cut off.
Only the cognition of 'something is strange' grazed past. He could not even distinguish whether it was Kim Rae-won's or his own. The fragment was too brief.
From the place where nothing remained, a voice was heard.
A woman's voice. Low and firm. Not a voice devoid of emotion, but a voice suppressing emotion.
"You must not go up."
Below his solar plexus was pressed down. A force pulling downward the body that wanted to ascend upward. Not weight but will. The owner of this voice was holding back with all her might.
Yet he ascended anyway.
Kim Rae-won broke through this refusal and went to the Border Realm. Leaving behind the voice pressing down on his chest. Because he had to go back. Because he had to go home. A futile longing had won over reason and the bonds he had built in this place.
The thing pooled in Dong Bong-soo's chest moved for a third time. That sensation that had been accumulating unprocessed from the surface layer. He still could not categorize it. But this time it was a little more vivid.
Darkness once more.
He could now be certain. That Kim Rae-won's memories and recollections were drifting mixed together in chaos without chronological order, floating in this abyss.
Among the fragments, a somewhat more intact piece surfaced. Unlike the other fragments, it held together without shattering.
Kim Rae-won was walking. It was a mountain path. Around the middle of the mountain, the energy changed. The smell of something old. A mixture of moss and ink and paper.
The energy reached him before the building was visible. Something closer to a mass of energy than a building occupied the middle of the mountain.
He was before the gate.
Through the broken image, dialogue was heard. Cut off and garbled.
"……Karma Root…… there is a record……"
"The qualification……"
"Just let me check……"
"……That is not possible."
Kim Rae-won's voice and someone else's voice alternated. Conversation with missing characters and cut-off syllables. Even so, the meaning could be read. There is a record of the Karma Root Clan inside here. He wants to see it. But he lacks the qualification.
The gate did not open.
Kim Rae-won turned away. The sensation of 'next time' clung to his retreating figure. A firm will to come again next time.
That next time never came.
Dong Bong-soo watched the retreating figure all the way to the end. Kim Rae-won had been searching for the answer to his own identity. And he had approached a place that might possibly hold the answer. Almost to the gate itself. But he could not open it.
[Unexplored location—Partial coordinate restoration]
The UI responded. Dong Bong-soo read the coordinates. Part of it was broken, but the direction was recoverable to a workable degree.
'I'll keep this in memory too.'
The fragment disappeared.
Nothing more surfaced. Not even fragments left to shatter. The darkness was complete. Its quality was different from the darkness up until now. The darkness up until now had been light that was extinguished; the darkness now was a darkness in which light had never existed.
It was the deepest base of Kim Rae-won's memory abyss.
There was no sensation underfoot. He could not even tell whether he was standing or floating. There was only the sensation that if he descended one step further, he would not be able to come back up.
The bottom of consciousness. The bottom of memory. Below that was not memory but oblivion, and beneath oblivion was nothingness. If he fell in, he might never awaken.
Dong Bong-soo stopped.
The restoration of memory data was roughly finished.
Now he simply had to ascend. If he drew his consciousness up to the surface and opened his eyes, the darkness inside the room would greet him warmly.
He was about to return like that.
But.
Something was standing within the darkness.
It was a woman standing with her back turned. Golden hair flowed long down her back. Her clothes were not of the Martial World. A form plucked straight from a European medieval sacred painting, resembling nothing of any garb from this Murim.
The appearance of a goddess in priestly robes.
A fragment of memory that could not possibly be encountered in this Murim was standing here.
"……"
Dong Bong-soo stopped.
The woman did not turn around. Only her back was visible. Through the golden hair that poured down as if to pierce the floor beneath, her shoulders were slender and her posture was still.
Dong Bong-soo did not approach. He stood quietly and watched.
At the edge of his field of vision, the afterglow of the UI floated.
The afterimage of the two systems, Murim Online and What is Hero, overlapping and blinking faintly. The color of that afterglow shifted ever so slightly.
From white, just a little, toward something warm.
The moment he registered that, the woman's voice was heard.
"You are…… quite different from that child."
The voice was not heard through ears. It was something that had directly rippled the surface of Dong Bong-soo's consciousness.
A sound wave, familiar yet not familiar.
Still the woman had not turned around.
But soon, Dong Bong-soo's consciousness began to rise again.
Not slowly. As if a foot had kicked off the floor, his consciousness surged upward. The darkness of the abyss fell away beneath him, and the golden-haired figure that had been standing within it grew distant.
Quickly.
Far too quickly.
Shattered fragments grazed past as he rose.
Mountain path, cliff, sand, the smell of blood, fragments of shouted syllables. All the debris of the deep layer grazed both sides of his consciousness like powdered glass as they passed.
The pressure was changing. The inside of his ears rang. The physics of rising from deep to shallow seemed to apply to memory as well.
He broke through the middle layer.
The road where three had walked side by side, the weather talk, the warmth near his shoulder—all of it grazed past at once and disappeared. The gazes at the Training Grounds, the blood-soaked navy blazer, the feet that saved and turned away and walked on again. All of it sank downward and grew distant.
The surface layer drew near. Light began to return.
Through that light, he raised his head and looked downward.
The woman was still visible.
The golden hair remained like a single ray of light within the darkness, but even that was growing faint.
Soon it became a dot, and even that dot was swallowed entirely by the darkness.