Chapter 43: Interlude. Human Limits.
Chapter 43: Interlude. Human Limits.
“Geezer. I can’t do this anymore.”
It had been several hours since I sat cross-legged and began my Seon Meditation on the scorching earth.
While the Magic Staff near my Dantian was now filled with a massive amount of Otherworldly Power, my entire body throbbed with pain because of it. The mental attacks and the sheer boredom inflicted by the Otherworld had reached an unbearable level.
I felt like I’d throw the whole training session away if I tried to do anything more, so I opened my eyes, uncrossed my legs, and flopped onto the ground.
As a result, my upper body began to sizzle alongside my already well-browned lower half, but compared to the mental agony that had been boring into my brain just moments ago, this was a pain I could easily endure.
I turned my head to see if the Heavenly Sword, who had been training alongside me, was still holding out.
“Uuugh… my body is cooking…”
There he was, the fool.
He must have tapped out a long time ago. His fireproof suit was riddled with holes, his face was buried in the dirt, and his entire skin was flushed red. He looked even more pathetic than I expected.
“Why is your face buried in the ground?”
“It’s… cooler this way.”
It seemed his brain had finally fried.
No matter how humid the air was, it couldn't possibly be worse than the ground being baked by that very air.
Well, it wasn't like he had much of a brain to begin with, so a little more damage probably wouldn't hurt.
In fact, seeing him like that, I figured it might be better to hope for a miracle—that his brain cells might rearrange into something more sensible as they cooked. I decided to leave him be.
Where was the geezer?
I couldn't see him even after turning my head left and right against the dirt. When I finally lifted my head, I spotted him.
It was the Heavenly Demon Sword God, radiating heat from his entire body as he absorbed the massive Waves of the Otherworld.
“He’s really soaking all that up.”
“He’s my master. Of course he is.”
Then maybe you, as his disciple, should stop dragging his name through the mud.
It was embarrassing to be his fellow student. I was just glad he didn't have the personality to act like a proper senior; if he’d demanded I treat him with respect as my senior, I might have run away long ago like the others.
I guess I’ve changed a lot, considering I’d rather endure physical hardship than deal with interpersonal drama.
As I watched the Heavenly Demon Sword God with these wandering thoughts, a different emotion began to stir within me.
Why can't I do that? Is there any reason I can't? Am I really satisfied just staring at the dirt?
“Hey. Jianping.”
“What? Don’t talk to me, my ears are ringing. My head still hurts.”
“Our old master is over there doing that. Does it make sense for his disciples to be lying around like this?”
“I know, but I can’t get up.”
It wasn't that he couldn't get up; he just had no intention of doing so.
“That’s why I’m catching up to you. Fine, forget it. I only spoke to you because we’re fellow students, but I’m going back to it.”
If I said that, surely the prideful Heavenly Sword would follow suit.
I—no, we—didn't have time to waste like this. We had to move forward, even if only by a step. For greater power.
“What? Hey. Say that to my face. Who’s catching up to who?”
Ignoring the voice in my ear, I crossed my legs again.
My exhausted body screamed in pain as if protesting my actions, but I suppressed it with my will and continued.
【People only torment you.】
【Do you think anyone will appreciate this penance? It’s all futile.】
【People betray, and then they betray again. Accept it. Justice is an illusion.】
As I sat cross-legged and began to take in the Otherworldly Power again, whispers reached me. Unlike the faint whispers at the outskirts, these were clear sentences, voices meant to tempt. I suppose it was natural, given how dense the Otherworld was here.
I’d heard such words plenty of times, whether in reality or as hallucinations, but it was a different story when they echoed through a hollow interior, replacing all other senses.
All I could hear were temptations bordering on curses; all I could feel was pain.
Behind my darkened eyelids, I saw not darkness, but painful memories.
I tasted the dull tang of metal in my mouth, and my numbed nose replayed the scent of sulfur.
Was it the memory of the battlefield where my squad was wiped out this time?
What meaning was there in their actions and their sacrifices?
【That’s right. They were wiped out because of you.】
It’s fine.
I can endure this much.
And besides, that wasn't my fault.
* * *
“You both managed to keep up today. Usually, you’re both passed out by now.”
Ho ho.
With a laugh that was truly like an Old Man’s, the Heavenly Demon Sword God slapped both of our backs.
Smack.
“Ow! That stings!”
“Tsk… my skin is practically peeled off. You shouldn't do that, geezer.”
A stinging pain radiated from my back along with the crisp sound of the impact, but fortunately, unlike the dazed Jianping next to me, I didn't scream.
“Your training is lacking. Making such a fuss over a little heat. Tsk tsk.”
We at least took breaks; I wondered how this Old Man stayed so energetic.
After our brief exchange, we moved our feet silently but swiftly.
It was a full sprint, driven by the desire to return to the settlement as quickly as possible.
It was the same return journey as always, but today, the silence felt unbearable, so I spoke up.
“Doesn't your head hurt?”
“What are you talking about all of a sudden, Ha-ram?”
“You’ve been doing this since before I met you, haven't you? Seeking out places where the Otherworldly Power is strong and... crossing your legs to... circulate energy.”
I still felt a resistance to using the term 'Circulation of Energy.'
I was a Magical Girl, and I didn't want to be that influenced by the ways of a Martial Artist. I acknowledged the methodology of building power, but the ritualistic pursuit of form wasn't my style.
“Is there a problem with that?”
There are plenty of problems. Two of the three people at the peak of the Awakened were knocked sideways by mental attacks alone, and countless initiates have already run away.
“Doesn't the scenery they show you look like a horrific hell?”
“Hell would be better than that.”
“Jianping, shut up.”
While I snapped at the suddenly interjecting Jianping, the Heavenly Demon Sword God fell into a quiet contemplation.
That didn't mean his legs stopped, though.
Just like always, we were sprinting at full speed while holding a conversation. It was a symbol of just how busily we moved.
“Ha-ram.”
“Yes.”
“What was your rank at the beginning?”
What an uncomfortable question.
“…Which beginning are you talking about?”
Actually, it didn't matter.
Whether it was when I first became an Awakened.
Or when I first met him.
Back then, I was just running in place.
“When you met me.”
“…It was F.”
Excluding the special S-Rank, there are six ranks for the Awakened, from A to F.
Among them, I was at the very bottom.
Combat ability, special abilities—everything.
I was an existence at The Lowest tier of the Awakened.
It wasn't as if there were many F-Ranks, either. The distribution of Awakened followed a diamond shape. C and D were the most common, while A and F were the extreme minorities. Furthermore, Magical Girls usually awakened with all their functions intact, earning them at least a C-Rank evaluation. I was a dropout who couldn't even achieve that.
“In your life, haven't you seen the best and worst of this world?”
“I have. Plenty.”
Especially because my rank was low.
The treatment of the Awakened in general is a mess, but those with high ranks at least appear to have power. Even if that power can't be directed at civilians, the power itself commands a sense of intimidation.
Because of that, all the hatred was concentrated on the lower ranks. To me, the world was…
“To someone like you, isn't the world already the same as hell?”
“….”
Startled, I looked at his face. He was smiling with his eyes closed.
“It was the same for me. No, it would be rude of me to say that. You likely suffered more than I did.”
“That’s not…”
I didn't think my misfortune was greater than that of other Awakened. The misfortune I experienced was a burden shared by all Awakened…
“A young person shouldn't have such a gloomy face. Just listen quietly when an Old Man who doesn't have much time left is speaking.”
You look like you’ll be energetic for another few decades, though…?
“To me, the world was hell. And I still consider it hell. So how could I succumb to the hell shown by my inner demons? Those things don't know what real hell is. What they show is something I can easily endure.”
I didn't understand. The hell they showed was my past or my wrong choices.
In other words, the voice inside my heart. If so, wouldn't it be even more painful for the Heavenly Demon Sword God, who already considers reality to be hell?
“They show me my past…”
In the end, I couldn't help but ask.
“It is the same for me.”
“Then how…”
“What is the problem with being shown something I have already endured once? I am a sword that has already been tempered in those very flames.”
I see. Unlike me, he seemed to think he had overcome his past.
Unlike me, who regretted, despaired, fell into grief, and ruminated on the past.
I fell into thought at the Heavenly Demon Sword God’s answer, and silence fell between us once more.
How much time had passed?
“Master. I have a question.”
Suddenly, the Heavenly Sword spoke up.
“What is it?”
“Master, you said the world is like hell. Then why do you swing your sword to protect others in this hell?”
Isn't that the same for you?
And for me.
In fact, probably every Awakened has an answer to that question.
They just don't say it out loud.
“The answer is already within you, so why do you ask me?”
As if seeing right through him, the Heavenly Demon Sword God turned his head with a hearty laugh.
“I want to hear your answer, Master.”
“Your own answer is enough. Do you really need someone else’s?”
“Yes.”
The Heavenly Sword was starting to look somewhat decent. Did he suddenly grow up?
“I swing my sword because I don't want others to suffer in hell as I did. That is all.”
Others. I think the Thunder God or Oxymoron said something similar. It’s been so long that I don't remember exactly what they said.
The Heavenly Sword fell silent, as if he had something to think about regarding the Master’s answer. Silence returned once more.
“Come to think of it…”
The Heavenly Demon Sword God spoke up abruptly. Since both his disciples had spoken once, it was as if it were now his turn.
“Wasn't the reason you two grown-ups have been following me around to find a clue about S-Rank techniques? Have you gotten a feel for it?”
S-Rank. That was indeed the reason.
“Not at all. Not even a speck.”
“It’s the same for me, Master.”
S-Rank. A category newly established for Awakened who were essentially unmeasurable.
“Aren't you two at the same level as me? Don't be impatient; just keep training your mind and your techniques. It will come naturally.”
“The same level? Master, your skills are still far above mine.”
“You say that, but isn't our actual combat ability about the same?”
The moment I said those words.
I received two conflicting reactions.
Jianping glared at me.
The Heavenly Demon Sword God nodded with a smile, as if my words were correct.
“Show some respect to the Master, Lee Ha-ram. I usually keep my mouth shut because the Master allows it, but that rudeness just now—”
“It’s just the truth.”
In reality, there is almost no difference in basic combat ability between an S-Rank and an A-Rank.
Perhaps that is the limit of being an Awakened—power that has reached its peak. If so, what is the boundary that separates A-Rank and S-Rank?
What divides A-Rank and S-Rank is the S-Rank Technique, also called an Ultimate Technique—something that transcends common sense and can instantly overturn the situation on a battlefield.
And those marked with the stigma of S-Rank were only four: the Heavenly Demon Sword God, Oxymoron, Macbeth, and Calavera.
Originally there were only three, but since the Heavenly Demon Sword God recently awakened his S-Rank Technique, the two of us from the same school had been sticking to him under the pretext of our master-disciple relationship.
“Take out your hammer, Lee Ha-ram.”
This idiot is being unusually serious today. Fine, I’ll play along.
“Fine. I’ll take it out. Let’s settle once and for all who’s on top today…”
We both drew our weapons and aimed them at each other. After a brief standoff, just as we were about to charge—
“Stop it.”
The Heavenly Demon Sword God’s firm voice cut between us.
“The settlement is right in front of us. Are you planning to fight in front of everyone?”
Hearing that, I focused mana into my eyes and realized we had already come close to the military camp.
Had the Otherworldly Power distorted my senses? I thought we had a long way to go, but we were already here.
Since I wasn't particularly heated up anyway, I obediently put my weapon away and looked at the Heavenly Sword.
“…We’ll settle this later, Lee Ha-ram.”
However, unlike me, the Heavenly Sword’s heat hadn't dissipated. He kept his weapon aimed at me as he spoke.
I didn't mind fighting later, but there was nothing in it for me, was there?
“If you lose, give me those cigarettes you’ve been stashing. You’ve hidden quite a lot, haven't you?”
If we were going to fight anyway, I might as well get some side profit.
“Fine! I’ll give them to you! You’d better have your cigarettes ready too!”
Only after shouting that did the Heavenly Sword seem satisfied enough to sheathe his sword, and we moved our legs toward the camp.
And so, another day of the insane routine—going right up to the edge of The Hole to sit cross-legged—came to an end.