Chapter 32: Don't Rest for More Than Five Minutes (2)
Chapter 32: Don't Rest for More Than Five Minutes (2)
After a pleasant time with Linshua, we headed back to the workshop together.
"The food was good, wasn't it, Dad?"
"It was."
It wasn't too sour, the greasiness from the generous amount of meat was well-balanced, and the signature aftertaste of the borscht was quite refreshing.
Moreover, she seemed to have realized why I ordered beer to go with it. The seasoning, which was saltier than typical borscht, paired perfectly with the alcohol.
Click.
The moment I opened the door while we were talking.
A sharp surge of killing intent was thrust toward us.
"Tsk."
Did the intruder react to my movement?
"Dad?"
Linshua’s voice was laced with worry.
"Stay behind me."
Was it the Management Bureau’s Assassination Unit? Or an attack from another hostile organization?
Such intense bloodlust couldn't be explained by anything else.
A massive wave of killing intent radiated in all directions, as if we were their parents' sworn enemies.
Clang!
An attack came flying in. A heavy impact struck down from above.
I parried it with my hammer, but the assailant's assault wasn't over.
Clack.
A Red Flash flickered before my eyes, and something hooked onto my hammer.
A Red Pry Bar.
As if trying to wrench The Hammer away by sheer force, a powerful strain pulled at the weapon.
Look at this one.
You want to have a contest of strength with me?
A smile played on my lips at such audacity.
My heart had already lightened. I had already figured out who the assailant was.
There was only one possibility.
The being who probably knew me better than anyone else in this world. The fact that such a being had challenged me to a test of strength was incredibly amusing.
"Go ahead, try and take it."
"Huh?"
A startled voice escaped the attacker, as if they hadn't expected me to actually let go.
The Hammer I released flew through the air along with the Pry Bar. The flustered assailant scrambled to grab The Hammer.
I watched the scene without doing anything.
The assailant gripped The Hammer with hands made of clay.
Knowing it was a powerful weapon, the attacker charged at me with a smirk.
"Die!"
The violent hammer swung toward my head from the right, but I didn't dodge. I simply watched and analyzed my opponent.
The movement wasn't bad.
Unlike Baek Si-hyun, this one utilized rotation as The Hammer flew in.
The murderous intent was clearly aimed at a killing blow.
The wrists were held with enough reserve to change the trajectory in case of a counter.
She’s far above Baek Si-hyun. Is this the difference made just by passing on experience and knowledge?
Still, it’s amateurish.
Clank.
Gauntlets materialized on both of my hands.
"Did you really think having that hammer would bridge the gap in our power?"
I trust that a clone of mine wouldn't be that foolish.
Screeeech!
The Hammer collided with the gauntlet.
The Hammer scraped up the gauntlet, heading for my head.
Now.
I jerked my arm upward.
The Hammer, which had too much momentum behind it, was knocked into the air by the slight impact and passed over my head.
The assailant’s front was wide open.
Overall, the assailant hadn't made a huge mistake.
Since I had given up The Hammer so easily, it was only natural to be cautious.
However, the opponent was none other than me—the one standing at the pinnacle of Heroes.
"Worried about a counter? Save that luxury for when you're fighting someone at your own level."
To an opponent you can't beat even with your best strike, holding back strength is nothing more than an opening to be exploited.
I swung my right hand toward the Mutant's exposed abdomen.
With her arm and The Hammer thrown upward, she had no way to block the punch.
Crash!
The hardened earth covering the Mutant's body shattered.
As the surface clay broke away, the Mutant's full appearance was revealed to me.
Black hair, black eyes, a black dress.
An exact double of me, holding a Pry Bar.
"Gah...!"
My clone Mutant let out a cry of pain. I moved my hand and gripped her by the throat.
The sensation of hitting myself, huh...
A Mutant that looks exactly like me, coughing up blood and crying out in pain from my punch.
It was a bizarre experience.
It wasn't a pleasant sight, so I slammed the Mutant onto the floor.
Thud.
"...ill."
Sprawled on the floor, the Mutant coughed up blood but muttered something in a small voice.
"What? Speak up."
"Kill me."
"Why is someone who hasn't even been born for a day talking about wanting to die?"
Did I make her wrong?
"You shouldn't fight! Dad! You have to get along! You're being mean too!"
It had been a battle thick with lethal intent, but the way my daughter described it was incredibly innocent.
A fight, she says.
"See? Even Linshua says that. Why don't you try getting along?"
"Kill me."
She’s a Mutant, so it wouldn't matter if I killed her, but Linshua wouldn't like that.
And it would mess up my plans as well.
Should I hear her out?
"Why are you asking me to kill you? What's bothering you so much?"
Black eyes turned toward me.
Eyes filled with hatred and despair.
"Why did you make me? Why did you let me be born? Why are you tormenting me?"
What is with this girl, spewing despair about her very existence?
"Linshua. Was there ever a friend who regretted being born?"
Linshua shook her head vigorously as she answered.
"Everyone said thank you! There was no one like that!"
Then what makes this one different?
"Tell me. What is so painful for someone who hasn't even been alive for a day? I'll listen."
I sat down next to the Mutant, taking a posture to listen to her story.
"Are you the owner of my memories?"
"That's right. I think I shoved in pretty much everything I could think of."
I gave her everything I could give.
Except for a few truly important things.
"Why are you still alive? How can you live while carrying such memories?"
"..."
So that was it.
The mind of a fragile, newborn Mutant couldn't withstand my past. Before she could even form a sense of self, she was overwhelmed by my history.
I hadn't copied myself from the start. I had simply tried to create a similar ego based on my experiences.
And the result was the collapse of that ego.
"You've already seen them. The clones dying in that dark laboratory. Our beginning."
"Don't talk about that. I hate it too."
If those memories were passed on, it's no wonder she wants to die.
To me, it was an event from fifteen years ago, but she would have experienced all those memories in an instant.
"I'm sorry. I had no idea it would be like that."
Just recalling the past for a moment plunged me into a somber mood as well.
If so, what kind of shock must a newborn child have felt?
Feeling a sense of pity, I reached out my hand to pat the Mutant's head.
Slap.
"Don't apologize."
The Mutant swatted my hand away.
"If you know you did wrong, then kill me. End this pain."
Hmm. How should I reason with this child? How can I give her the will to live?
What this being is doing right now is simple denial of reality. She was simply broken by the torrent of horrific memories the moment she was born.
I saw Linshua staring blankly at us from over there.
She looked restless, not knowing what to do.
Let's try this.
"You. What do you think about Linshua?"
At that question, the hatred in the Mutant's eyes faded slightly.
"I'm grateful. Because I know what kind of heart you, as the creator, put into me."
"What kind of heart was it?"
"The happiness of helping a parent. A pleasant past. A future that will be newly connected."
Truly, she is a daughter I don't deserve.
"And you're saying everything was ruined because of the memories I put in?"
"Yes."
In the end, it all comes down to resentment toward me.
I think I've got the gist of it.
"Do you have memories of Linshua?"
"I do."
I don't know exactly how much she remembers, so I'm not sure if this persuasion will work, but I have to try what I can.
"Then try to recall those memories. See if my memories are truly nothing but cursed ones."
The first time she called me Dad.
When she held my blood-stained fingers.
If it's you, you should know what I was feeling then.
"It's not enough. In the end, you're just feeling self-satisfaction from that."
For a newborn, she's quite prickly.
"Do you remember what contracts I gave you?"
"Was it twelve? They were damn complicated."
"That is the reason I am alive. Think about it carefully."
"What do you mean...?"
I ignored her words and walked toward the workshop exit.
Passing by Linshua, who was standing by the door, I whispered softly to her.
"Linshua. Comfort her a bit. She seems confused since she just woke up."
"Okay!"
As Linshua ran toward the Mutant, I left the workshop and closed the door.
The moonlight and city lights reflected through the floor-to-ceiling windows. Looking at those lights, I pulled a White Rod from my coat.
Crunch.
The Mutant's scream echoed in my mind.
The question of why I am alive.
The scream she let out was, in fact, a question directed at me.
Why am I living and enduring this pain?
At first, it was a sense of justice.
Next, it was for humanity.
Next, it was for the Awakened.
Next, it was a sense of duty.
Finally, Linshua remained.
And now, there was nothing left.
Just a shell living according to the rules he had set for himself.
Even the fire that flared up in my heart again was a flame of rage following someone's death.
"How can I tell you something even I don't know? You idiot."
To want an answer in a single day that I haven't found in thirty years.
I leaned my back against the glass, soothing my heart with the cold chill of the night seeping through.
* * *
"Dad! You'll come back soon next time, right?"
"I will."
It had been a few hours since I patted Linshua’s head and left New York.
Now, I was racing across the deserts of the central United States.
"Can't we take a detour?"
"I want to be back in Korea before Monday. You can come slowly if you want."
The black Mutant was kicking up dust as she chased after me.
"What about using teleportation magic?"
"That's expensive. It's not something you can just use all the time."
Hmm...
I threw a word at the Mutant, who was making a long humming sound as if deep in thought.
"Can't you find the answer if you dig through my memories? How expensive it is?"
"I don't want to step on a landmine while digging through your memories."
My memories are being treated like a minefield, huh? I suppose that's fair.
More than that, there was something I'd been curious about since our first meeting.
"Isn't your way of speaking a bit gender-neutral?"
"Because I'm a woman."
"What are you talking about?"
Since when am I a woman?
"I was created in a female form, and I received a female ego, so I'm a woman."
"Ah... right. Well, I guess it doesn't matter."
The more different Black Marauder is from me, the better.
Whether she's feminine or not is none of my business.
"It doesn't matter when you're Black Marauder, but when you're acting in my place, mimic my way of speaking. I don't want to get caught because of something like that."
"..."
I didn't get an answer, as if something had displeased her.
She'll figure it out.
As time passed and we crossed the Rocky Mountains, I kept questioning her.
Questions to get to know each other.
The questions started with her manner of speech but gradually moved toward her way of thinking and minor behavioral principles.
For the most part, her way of thinking was similar to mine, but a huge gap opened up on a few crucial questions.
Thoughts on the Management Bureau, how she viewed humans, the unpleasantness of the Otherworld, and her thoughts on Linshua.
As the divergence in our thoughts grew, I asked the final question.
"Do you have a name?"
The final wedge separating her from me.
A question to completely independent her from myself.
"Lee Ha-ram."
"That's my name. Your name as a Mutant."
"I don't have one."
I had hoped Linshua would give her a name, but it seemed Linshua intended to leave this child entirely to me.
I figured as much, so I spoke the name I had been considering while running.
"Yumil."
"What?"
"Your name is Yumil. I'll call you that from now on, so remember it."
At my words, Yumil seemed flustered, letting out a breath and slowing her pace.
"Yumil... Yumil..."
She whispered softly, as if trying to memorize her own name.
I slowed down slightly for her. So she wouldn't realize she was flustered.
"Fine. My name is Yumil."
"I'm glad you like it."
A smile spread across her face for the first time. That happy face Linshua had sculpted.
The disposition she was originally meant to have.
And the disposition I had ruined.
I turned my face away from her.
* * *
"How do we cross the ocean?"
After sprinting across the entire United States, we arrived at a sandy beach adjacent to the Pacific Ocean.
"By running."
"Based on the common sense I received from Lady Linshua, that's nonsense."
"Dig through my memories if you feel it's unfair."
I ignored her and started my engine, pouring mana into my legs.
Creating a mana field under one's feet, crossing on a staff, or riding the current—those are things the weak do.
Martial artists seem to treat it as a precise technique called 'Water-Walking,' but it's really just a matter of solving it with brute force.
I poured strength into my leg muscles and kicked off the ground.
Passing the sandy beach at high speed, I set foot on the water.
There's no need to step with the next foot before the first one sinks. All that's needed is enough impact to keep the body afloat.
Thump. Thump. Thump.
Taking refreshing steps that sounded like a drum, I ran straight across The Sea.
"If you don't like it, find a boat and come on your own."
A provocation thrown back at Yumil, who remained behind.
If she has a personality similar to mine, then probably...
Splash! Splash! Splash! Plop!
As expected, she followed.
Yumil kicked up massive pillars of water and even overtook me for a moment.
See? I told you it works.
Perhaps she lost her balance, as Yumil, who had been running ahead of me, sank, but that was just a lack of sense of balance. If left alone, she'd figure it out and catch up.
"I'm going ahead."
"Wait a sec—"
Ignoring the sinking Yumil, I headed forward.