The Evil God of Darkness (1)
The night before we set out for Burrow Territory, everyone who had agreed to help me defeat the evil god gathered at the Artea family estate.
The reason was simple.
We intended to strike Burrow Territory the very instant dawn broke.
No one could say how long it would take to bring down Tariki. My guess was that everything would be over in less than half a day if all went according to plan — but a battle against an evil god always demands contingencies. If the fight dragged on and night fell, there was no telling how the situation might twist against us.
So the operation would begin the moment the sun rose. Everything had to be finished while the sun still held the sky.
With the plan laid out, the sensible thing to do for tomorrow's sake was to go to sleep right away — and yet there I was, still staring out the window even as the moon climbed toward the center of the night sky.
Feeling anxious, are we?
...Yes.
The tension in my heart simply wouldn't loosen. There was no way I could lie down in bed.
The last time you were like this was when you sat the Academy entrance exam.
Was it?
Indeed. You've always been a woman of boldness and confidence, Ryeo-ah.
Now that I thought about it, he had a point. I could barely remember the last time I'd fretted like this.
Every crisis that had come my way either arrived with my confidence already in hand, or came crashing down on me so fast there was no time to worry.
Hey, Grandfather.
What is it?
What were you like at times like this?
What had Halbae been like back in the day? Judging by his usual personality, I couldn't quite picture him being all that nervous.
Me? I was a nervous wreck.
...You were?
Aye. There were countless nights I couldn't sleep a wink and spent the whole night praying to the gods instead. I made plenty of blunders from lack of sleep on account of it.
Halbae let out a hearty laugh at the memory.
Grandfather, wound up tight and utterly beside himself. It was honestly hard to imagine.
That's the normal way of it, girl. If you don't feel tension in a life-or-death situation, what kind of human would you be?
I... suppose that's true?
It is. So don't fret. You've done everything in your power already. All that's left now is to ponder what lovely insults you'll fling while grinding Tariki's face into the dirt.
Why is trash-talking the premise here?!
Weren't you planning to anyway?
...I mean, yes, obviously I'm going to insult him. When Tariki gets furious and starts slinging curses back, I'll be so delighted I'll run my mouth through every word in the book.
But I don't appreciate you taking it for granted that I'll trash-talk him!
That just makes me sound like a genuine little menace!
Well. Never mind that.
What, then?
If you truly have nothing to do, do some training.
Didn't you say to rest before a big undertaking?
More practical than tossing and turning atop your bed all night, isn't it?
That... was fair. Staring out the window clearly wasn't going to get me any sleep, so I lay down obediently on the bed. The moment my eyes closed, the training grounds appeared — so familiar by now they'd gone beyond routine into sheer tedium — and Halbae, still in his armor, gave me a reassuring smile.
Dawn, the following day — the hour when the moon and stars still lingered faintly behind wisps of cloud.
Having completed every preparation, Phoebe was offering a prayer to the Chief God with a heart full of reverence.
The prayer was long and intricate, though the heart of it was simple: O great Chief God, watch over those who seek to carry out Your will. Protect them. Grant them Your aid.
The prayer carried on for a long while, until it was broken by a knock at the door.
"Saintess."
At the sound of Johann's voice from beyond the door, Phoebe jolted upright in alarm. She hurriedly smoothed herself before the mirror, then opened the door.
"Good morning to you."
Though the hour was far too early to call it morning, Johann was immaculately dressed — presentable enough to step straight into a service without a moment's notice.
"Indeed. And did you sleep well last night, Bishop Johann?"
"I should like to say that I did, but alas, I slept precious little. My heart races each time I think of tomorrow."
He smiled wryly, calling himself foolish for behaving so at his age, and Phoebe's eyes went slightly wide.
The Johann she knew was as strict with others as he was with himself.
Especially with her.
Whenever Johann looked at Phoebe, his expression stayed rigid, and his unsmiling lips offered nothing but rebuke.
And so Phoebe had always found him difficult.
Even knowing he was, in truth, a good man. Even knowing he approached the divine with more earnestness than anyone.
But the Johann standing before her now was different.
The loose smile on his face belonged to a boy dreaming of adventure.
The very sort of boy Phoebe had once been, long ago.
"Saintess?"
"...Yes? Oh."
It's all right, Phoebe. You're fine.
You've already accepted it in your heart, haven't you?
As she frantically steadied her expression, Johann let one eyebrow dip ever so slightly.
"Forgive me. I seem to be a touch short on sleep myself."
He must be displeased with my slip. Phoebe offered the excuse and braced herself for the scolding — but Johann only exhaled a small sigh and said nothing at all.
"I've come to see you because of Lady Alrn. The execution of our plan draws near, yet she still seems to be resting in her room."
"Understood. I'll go to her at once."
"Yes. I'd be grateful if you would."
After Johann departed, Phoebe let out a long, slow breath.
Then she stepped out of her room without a moment's hesitation.
She had no idea which room Lucy was staying in — but that posed no problem at all.
Her divinity, that warmth like sunlight itself, was something no one who had ever stood beside it could possibly forget.
Phoebe had barely arrived before a certain door when a voice drifted out from within.
"Come in, noob Saintess."
She must have sensed me coming. Truly befitting Lady Alrn. But the moment Phoebe opened the door, she froze solid where she stood.
A window flung wide open. Curtains dancing on the chill wind of the turning season.
And beneath them, Lucy's long crimson hair, swaying in rhythm with the breeze.
A small pair of hands gathered reverently at her chest. Lips moving in slow cadence. Eyes pressed gently shut.
And flowing from her, a soft, warm divinity that made even the cold breath of early winter vanish from memory.
Lucy was at prayer.
Ah.
How beautiful can one scene possibly be?
Spellbound, Phoebe found her own hands drifting together before she came back to her senses — she had realized she was interrupting Lucy's prayer.
...What manner of disrespect is this, Phoebe?! Interrupting the Lady's prayer!
Should I close the door again right now? No — but the Lady did tell me to enter? Going back out would be the ruder thing to do...
Just as Phoebe spiraled into full panic, Lucy opened her eyes — and the divinity rippling around her scattered away on the wind.
"What are you doing, noob Saintess?"
"...I-I'm so sorryyyy!"
No matter how I look at it, Phoebe treats me less like a friend and more like an object of veneration, or some treasured saint to be enshrined. She's having a full-blown meltdown over interrupting a prayer of all things.
In this case, the girl's reaction is the normal one. She interrupted morning prayers — and not just any prayers, but the prayers of the Chief God's own Apostle.
Really?
Halbae insisted Phoebe's reaction wasn't so strange, but I still couldn't wrap my head around it.
Prayer is just talking to the noob Chief God, isn't it? What's the harm in doing it half-heartedly?
See? Look at this:
Daily Quest Cleared!
✦ Divinity increased slightly!
✦ Grace increased slightly!
🎁 Reward: Bonus Blessings
Even when I phone it in, the noob Chief God is so delighted he showers me with rewards.
Doesn't the Church take the noob Chief God a bit too seriously? Sure, the guy's a sleazy pervert, but he's not picky.
...I'd say it's you who takes the Chief God far too lightly.
Brushing aside the exasperation in Halbae's voice, I calmed Phoebe down, sent her on ahead, then pulled my armor out of the Inventory and got dressed.
The first time I put this armor on, I fumbled hopelessly — now my hands move before my mind even catches up. Well, I have been wearing it for quite a while now.
By the time I finished preparing and made my way to the drawing room, everyone but me was already assembled.
"You've arrived, my lady."
Carl, who had at last taken the sword I gifted him out of its display case, bowed his head.
"My apologies for earlier, my lady."
Despite my telling him not to, Phoebe apologized yet again.
"You've arrived."
Johann inclined his head, a holy scripture cradled against his chest.
"All preparations are complete."
Alsaetin nodded with a stiff face.
"I am a disgrace. To have succumbed to desire and abandoned my post in the forest..."
And there on the sofa sat the Face-Connoisseur Fox, face buried in both paws, berating her own idiocy.
She's been like this since yesterday.
If you've succumbed to desire, then at least commit to it fully — why throw this tantrum over failing at both? Honestly, it's insufferable.
I walked up to her and knocked the paws away from her face.
The fox's eyes met mine.
"Hey, trashy fox♡ Since when were you ever fine to begin with?♡ You're a pervert who does nothing but revolting things♡"
"..."
"If you want to crawl proudly along the floor, you'd better listen well to your master?♡ If you want punishment, earn it properly♡ you trash♡"
I finished it off in a whisper, and light flickered back into the Face-Connoisseur Fox's eyes.
She recovers her spirit only by taking abuse. A genuine pervert, through and through.
...Wait. Is she doing this on purpose just to get insulted?
I couldn't say for anyone else, but coming from the face-obsessed fox, that suspicion feels entirely reasonable.
Ugh. Genuinely disgusting.
After glaring at her with all the loathing I could muster, I lifted my head — and found every gaze in the room fixed on me.
...The fact that everyone except the spatial mage looks completely unbothered is so annoying. At this rate it really does seem like I'm the unhinged one here.
And another thing — Carl, why on earth are you staring at this like you're envious?
Ugh! Seriously! Could you please! Just! Return to normal?! Where's the knight who swore he'd become a true knight? Past-you was considerably more functional!
Wiping a hand down my face, I turned to the spatial mage, who spoke up with an awkward smile.
"Teleportation preparations are complete. If you wish, we can depart at any moment."
Glancing out the window, I could see the sky shifting from violet to scarlet — the sun was rising.
Having confirmed that, I looked around the room once more, and everyone nodded as if they already knew what I was about to say.
Everyone ready?
Understood.
Let's go right now.
"Let's go, transport slave."
"...Ahem. Yes. Understood."
As the spatial mage struck the floor with his staff, blue flames bloomed up from the ground.
Seeing them, I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.
It's fine. My plan is so airtight even Halbae called it perfect. All that remains is to execute it, and then laugh in the face of Tariki — who thought he'd already won.
"Wha—?!"
Right at that moment, a horrified cry burst from the spatial mage's lips.
"The spell is being interfered with!"
...Tariki. The bastard noticed us.
"Damn it! I can't cancel it! I'll try to hold the coordinates, but don't count on it!"
Who knew how long it had been after the mage's helpless shout — when the scenery around us tore apart.
From the tidy drawing room of the Artea estate to an empty, endless blue sky.
Haha! Unbelievable! The host heard we were coming and threw in a complimentary skydiving experience?! They really pulled out all the stops to entertain their guests!
Feeling my body accelerate with gravity, I scanned below.
First of all — we'd landed properly inside Burrow Territory.
Every single person from the drawing room had been transported to the same spot, too.
All things considered, the spatial mage did his job admirably, even with Tariki jamming him mid-cast.
Which means it's now everyone else's turn to work.
Face-Connoisseur Fox!
"Face-Connoisseur Fox!"
"On it! I'll handle the counterattack!"
Having left the interception to the fox with her arsenal of mystic fox-arts, I felt the sinister aura churning far below and steadied my shield.
Black mana shells came screaming toward us, hungry to swallow us whole.
Wow. Skydiving wasn't enough — now fireworks, too? They truly prepared a full hospitality package for their guests, didn't they?!
"My lady! I'll take that one!"
It's fine!
No need — hold position, Incompetent Dog!
The me of the past.
The me who first faced Nakrad.
That girl wouldn't even have thought to block it.
But not anymore.
The me of back then and the me of now are different.
Hasn't it only been half a year, you ask?
No.
For this hardcore veteran, half a year is half a year and then some.
I pressed strength into the corner of my lips and gathered divinity at the rim of my shield — and that divinity spread outward, expanding it into a barrier vast enough to swallow the shells whole.
The moment it formed, the shells slammed into the wall of holy light.
The impact was so fierce my body threatened to shoot upward against gravity — but that was all.
Light standing before darkness shows not so much as a scratch.
Hey, Tariki.
If this is all you've prepared for me...
Then I have to say, I'm a little disappointed.
You gloomy, no-good, pathetic piece of trash.