Night of Destiny (4)
How long had I spent at her side in silence? Minutes, at least.
At some point, Serpina had stopped crying. She turned her head and spoke.
"……You've seen me at my worst."
Her face as she said it was flushed as red as a beet — so clearly that, with truly unforgivable insolence, I found myself thinking she looked cute.
"I'm the same, you know. And I don't think of it as something you shouldn't have shown me."
"……."
I could feel how puffy my own eyes were.
Just moments ago, Serpina and I had cried together. She had wept her own tears, and I mine — each of us pouring out our sorrow.
Perhaps that was why my mind felt clearer than it had at any other moment. I only hoped hers had cleared as well.
I broke the silence, carefully changing the subject.
"That aside…… I've heard some of it from General Irene, but what exactly happened?"
"If you've already heard, then the explanation will be quick. It was exactly that."
"The ones who attempted the assassination were……"
"……."
Serpina slowly closed her eyes.
Simply recalling the fact seemed to be quite difficult for her.
The one who had aimed for her life…… was a man named Leni — the de facto leader of her personal guard, someone she had trusted above all others.
I knew him well enough myself.
We had never spoken, but his face had always been there whenever he escorted her. He carried the weight of a middle-aged man who had weathered a great many storms — yet he was a complete blank in my memories.
I didn't press her. I simply waited, calmly.
How much time passed?
At last, she carefully parted her lips.
"Guarding me was effectively Leni's final career."
I listened in silence.
"Leni had led the knight order since the days when the empire still stood intact…… He was a reliable man. Not long after I ascended to the throne — when my position was still far from secure…… he told me he would serve as my shield. Even then, just as now, there was hardly a soul I could truly trust. In that situation, Leni was one of the most trustworthy commanders I had."
And that same Leni had finally turned the blade he'd been hiding against her.
"Shura, who appeared to have joined hands with him, was also a woman Leni had recommended. Rough around the edges, but exceptional. She seemed ashamed of her lowly birth, so I told her again and again — that I cared nothing for what blood ran through her veins."
Shura's face was one I had seen a few times as well.
Like Leni, I had never spoken with her…… but failing to notice the murderous intent that must have lingered, however faintly, in her eyes was a bitter failure.
"When you assigned Irene to me as a personal guard, you had already sensed that an assassination attempt might come. Wanting to keep Irene close…… even for a lie, that was far too clumsy, wasn't it, Swen?"
"……."
"But I couldn't bring myself to suspect him. The thought that Leni…… would turn a blade on me never even crossed my mind. You must think me terribly complacent."
"Not at all. I should have been more…… careful on your behalf."
I berated myself for never thinking to suspect her personal guards. But predicting something like that was the domain of gods, not men. It was a question far too cruel for either Serpina or myself.
In that sense, Lady Irene's response had been nearly perfect. She had cut Leni's actions off at the root before he could even make the attempt.
The problem had been the woman named Shura.
From the circumstances, it seemed Shura had targeted Irene while Leni went after Serpina…… and it was only because Irene had kept the possibility of an assassination attempt constantly in mind that things hadn't gone worse. Anyone else would likely have been struck down without even understanding what was happening.
If……
If Lady Serpina hadn't thrown herself in the way, Lady Irene would have……
Without realizing it, I clenched my fist tight.
The woman called Shura had been executed on the spot, and Leni had been left in a state where he might as well have lost both legs.
Naturally, I found myself hoping he was still alive. Leni, and whoever stood behind him…… If I didn't deal with them myself, I didn't think I would ever be able to rest easy.
Then—
"How ridiculous."
Serpina let out a small sigh and gave a bitter laugh.
"In the end, all it does is make me realize once again that there is no one at my side…… so why does my chest hurt so much? Everything that has happened before simply happened again…… so why does it feel this desolate? Do I even have the right to feel this way anymore…… I just don't know. Not anymore."
"Perhaps, as you said…… I am simply not fated to become the emperor of a unified empire……"
"That's not…… true."
I chose my words carefully, trying not to wound her further.
"As I told you, the answer changes depending on the circumstances at the time—"
"……."
Serpina slowly opened her eyes. Then she looked at me.
"Then what of now?"
"……Pardon?"
"Has my fate changed? Can I become the sovereign of a unified realm?"
Seeing me unable to answer easily, Serpina turned her head away again. Then…… as if she had misspoken, she said carefully:
"……I'm sorry. I was being childish with you."
"Not at all."
"If I were to break over something this trivial, I would have no face to show those who bore the name of Aingart and fell before me…… I know that well enough."
An assassination attempt was hardly something that could be called trivial. But if this was her own way of finding strength, then thoughtlessly offering empty comfort wasn't the right response either.
In moments like this, was simply standing by her side and supporting her the answer?
I carefully took her hand and held it firmly.
"I believe in you, Lady Serpina."
"……."
"I told you just a moment ago, didn't I? I believe every word you say, Lady Serpina."
Serpina stared straight into my eyes for a long while…… then, with a slightly sulky air, she puffed out her cheeks a little and said:
……Cute.
"……You won't call me your lord, I see."
"……."
Behind that cute expression, my heart ached again.
She had roughly anticipated it. The fact that I would someday leave her side. Having gone that far, I couldn't keep pretending not to know forever either.
But…… the timing was wrong. She was far too wounded for me to bare my true thoughts. Body and heart alike.
So once again, I put on the mask of the strategist of the Mind's Eye.
"……What does a title matter, my lord? The one I serve right now is no one else but you."
"It feels like you're prostrating yourself and offering empty bows."
She said that, then slowly turned her head toward me.
Her golden eyes, cleared after pouring out so many tears, sparkled as if they held the Milky Way itself.
"Even so, it's fine. I've prepared myself."
"Prepared yourself?"
"Yes. Even if the day comes when you leave my side…… I've resolved not to resent you."
Serpina smiled as she said it.
It was strange. Only a short while ago, her smile had looked as if it might shatter at any moment…… yet now it had grown far more solid.
She was a strong person. Serpina.
"And besides…… my chance has not yet disappeared."
Having said that — she grabbed my wrist with a soft tap.
I didn't refuse. I entrusted my wrist to her.
"Swen, the fact that you cried with me is proof of that, is it not?"
"……."
"It seems I've managed to steal a little of your heart from some nameless sovereign. Hehehe……"
I deliberately turned my head away from her sunlight-bright smile.
……This is bad.
If things continued like this, I really might…… lose all room for choice on my end. My heart. My gaze. Every compass of my thinking…… was pointing fiercely toward the existence that was Serpina.
Thump, thump.
Thump, thump.
Without meaning to, I glanced back at her.
Her pure white shoulders…… entered my vision again. Though covered by bandages, the enormous curves of her chest — impossible to hide — forced themselves into view whether I wanted to see them or not.
Feeling something like a man's instinct stir within me, I quickly turned my head away, but—
"Swen."
At Serpina's voice, laced with playfulness, I instinctively knew she'd caught me again.
"Are you…… interested?"
"……Pardon?"
"I asked whether my body…… is enough to hold your interest."
The end of her voice trembled slightly. Looking at her expression…… she looked ready to explode in more ways than one. Where had all that absolute-ruler charisma gone? The way she was getting flustered over her own words was the spitting image of Lady Irene.
"Your joke goes too far, my lord."
"It seems I hold little charm for you."
"That's not it, but…… how could I dare harbor such disrespectful thoughts?"
"Is that so?"
Then — Serpina put strength into the hand holding my wrist—
"……Ah."
I toppled. Far too easily, I collapsed onto the bed where she lay.
Right before my eyes. Serpina was lying there.
"……Even like this?"
"……!!!!"
"Even like this…… does it still not affect you?"
Serpina filled my entire field of vision. Her golden hair. The scent of citron that drifted from her. Beyond the bandages beneath her pure white shoulders, two enormous breasts of a violently impossible size that could not be concealed.
Suddenly. All too suddenly, the moment of our first kiss came flooding back.
It wasn't just a memory. The sensations began to feel vividly, sharply real. Her soft tongue. The sticky saliva. The citron fragrance stimulating my mouth and nose.
As for me — I was like a machine whose cord had been yanked out, unable to do anything, my compass of thought completely lost.
"Se……rpina."
Not Lady Serpina, not my lord — just Serpina.
And she, for her part, didn't take issue with it at all. Face flushed deep red, she looked up at me……
"……Swen. I…… it's okay."
One woman, gazing up at the man she loved——
"Swen, if it's you…… you can do…… whatever you want…… it's okay……"
I……!!!!!
———Knock knock knock.
"……!!!!"
I shot up from the bed in shock. Serpina, equally startled, pulled slightly away from me.
What just happened? No — more importantly…… that sound. Someone was knocking on the door.
Whew……
……Thank goodness. Truly, thank goodness. I had almost committed a genuine disaster. In a situation like this, any action that might make Serpina misunderstand me absolutely had to be avoided.
Serpina seemed to have recovered her composure as well. She cleared her throat a few times, then wrapped herself in the blanket and said:
"……Open it."
"……."
I stood as if nothing had happened, let out a short breath, and opened the door.
And—
"……Huh?"
"Um, ah, h-hello, Lord Swen……!!"
The one who had knocked was Reika. And for some reason, her eyes were blazing with determination—
"Th-that is, um…… I…… I h-have something I'd like to s-say……!"
"Something you'd like to say?"
"Yes! If, um…… i-if it's alright with you…… please hear me out……!!!"