Chapter 29
Chapter 29
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Translator: Vine
Chapter: 29
Chapter Title: The Ogre Appears
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Ogre.
Ogres, also known as greenskins, are such common monsters in fantasy that everyone knows them.
Often depicted as muscle-bound brutes, they possess immense strength and tough hides that blades can barely pierce. Depending on the lore, some even have high-speed regeneration.
'But still, isn't 'greenskin' a bit racist?'
I've always wondered if the term 'greenskin' is like calling someone a greenie.
Maybe they don't get it because there's no racial discrimination based on skin color here.
Anyway, that's our target for today.
'Finally, a real monster.'
Goblins were just too weak. Honestly, it felt like fighting a brat with a weapon. It was more satisfying in the way you'd teach a lesson to some kid acting tough behind an anonymous username, rather than fighting a monster.
And the direwolves. They're just big doggos. There are tons of dog training videos on YouTube; if you've seen even one, hunting them becomes way too easy.
Lastly, the Rhino Horns. What's the point of beating a herbivore? It's no different from being some moron who throws a rock at a spider in its web, hits it, and then cheers, "I won!"
In that sense, I'm really looking forward to today.
Ogres are D-rank monsters in this world, but they're depicted as quite powerful in other settings.
My mouth is already watering.
"Kuhehehel."
"…Could you please do something about that weird laugh?"
"But I can't help it. I'm excited."
Aren't you excited, Luna? It's an ogre.
"Everyone else takes these quests for the money, not for the thrill of it like you, Sir Luke."
You have to work to make a living, and you want to earn a lot of money.
So you're saying they do it because the pay is good enough to risk their lives?
These guys just don't get how fun this is because they've never lived in a world without monsters.
They don't know what it's like to wake up at seven, get ready for work, slave away all day, leave at six, and get home at seven. You eat, relax for a few hours, and then it's time for bed again.
A life of repeating that for decades. How boring is that? Besides, adventurers are basically freelancers, aren't they? A job where you work when you want to and don't when you don't.
There are no bosses to constantly chew you out, no unlucky overtime shifts, and no crazy old geezers dragging you to company dinners.
'Should I start a monster cult later and spread the gospel of their greatness?'
They use monster parts to make weapons and armor, eat monsters to supplement their food supply, and some regions even develop monsters as local specialties.
This is why they say if you keep doing favors for people, they start thinking it's their right.
"So, where do we go now?"
"We need to go left from here."
"Ugh… What a pain."
It's all just forest. What's the point of left and right?
"It can't be helped. The Empire is obsessed with nurturing talent, so the academy always gets priority."
Tch. Damn Empire.
I should've known when Adela said it was near the academy.
We didn't know, but it seems today is the academy's practical training day.
Earlier, while wandering around cluelessly, we ran into an academy professor. The ones who didn't know me mistook me for a student because of my uniform, but the professors who knew I'd dropped out just gave me a warning.
They also told me that non-students aren't allowed to wear the uniform, and I said I understood.
Of course, I have no intention of changing.
'Ordering me around without even paying for the clothes?'
Clothes are so expensive these days. In my past life, a single pair of brand-name sweatpants could cost over a hundred bucks.
Who's going to listen when they're bossing me around without even paying for my clothes?
"By the way, forgetting to tell us today was the academy's training day… Adela's a bit much, don't you think?"
"…"
Luna looked at me with an expression that said she had a lot to say but was holding it all in.
The half-lidded, weary eyes were a bonus.
"What's with that look?"
"It's nothing."
What the hell? Don't just trail off like that.
The number one thing that pisses people off is when someone stops talking mid-sentence. The second is—
"Sir Luke. I think we've arrived."
"Oh?"
I looked around.
No, I didn't even need to.
"You're amazing, Luna. How did you know we arrived?"
It's not like you have a compass, or a GPS showing our location on a map.
No matter where you look in the forest, it's just trees. I don't know how you always know when we've reached our destination.
"I can hear it. The sound of heavy footsteps. And I can smell it. A stench like something hasn't bathed in years."
As she said this, Luna furrowed her brow slightly, as if to prove her point.
'Times like these, it's nice being human.'
I can't smell it, and Luna finds the way for me.
"Sir Luke. It's coming."
"What is?"
"About forty-five degrees to the right of where we're looking."
"So what's coming?!"
Seriously, what the hell?
Why are you keeping all the good stuff to yourself?
Just then, a tree in front of us toppled over, and something fat and enormous entered the edge of my vision.
It was easily over three meters tall.
A monster with dark green skin all over, a slightly protruding lower jaw, and upward-pointing tusks, carrying a massive wooden club the size of its own arm.
It was today's target: the ogre.
"Whoa… You were right, Luna. It really does smell like shit."
I couldn't tell when it was far away, but now that it's close enough to see, I get it.
The pungent liquid I sprayed on the direwolf last time—a mix of vinegar and chili powder—was a sharp scent that pierced the brain. But the smell coming off that filthy body was a nauseating stench that clouded one's judgment and made you scrunch up your face.
"You bastard! Take a bath once in a while! You reek of crap!"
It's a forest, so there must be water around. At this point, it must be deliberately avoiding bathing.
I'm usually on the receiving end of nagging, but dishing it out for once, I could slightly understand how parents feel.
-Uwooooar!!!!
The ogre whipped around and let out a piercing shriek, like a hooligan being scolded.
"…Well done. So much for a surprise attack."
"Hey, how could I not say anything after seeing that?"
It's literally covered in grime!
I wanted to nag it some more, but there was no time.
The ogre, having recognized an enemy before it, swung the ridiculously large wooden club in its hand.
A wide, horizontal swing. With its overwhelming power, any tree the club struck was reduced to what was once a tree.
"Oh, shit. That's scary as hell."
With a single swing, trees snapped like twigs and flew in every direction.
If it's that strong, shouldn't it be slow?
There's a stereotype that being big and strong makes you slow, but seeing that, it was fast enough to shatter that notion in an instant.
"Take this! Emerald Splash!"
I took out some caltrops from my inventory and threw them at the beast.
But the caltrops just bounced off its belly. A few managed to stick, but the blood loss wouldn't have been fatal even for a human.
"I knew I shouldn't have used a supporting character's move."
Soon, the beast came closer to me.
"You fell for it, you fool!"
They say ogres have low intelligence. Despite being hit by the caltrops I just threw, it failed to notice the ones on the ground and took a step forward, stepping right on them.
However, a problem arose.
-Uwooooar!!
-Fwoosh!
"Nani!?"
I definitely saw it step on the caltrops, but it charged right through and slammed its club down in front of me.
It was as if it had coated only the soles of its feet with Armament Haki; the ogre was as unbothered as if it had stepped on an ant.
'Tsk. Guess there are no easy wins.'
Too bad.
Time to try another method, then.
"Luna! Go cut its Achilles tendon!"
At my command, Luna, who had been watching until now, moved swiftly.
It all happened in an instant.
First.
Luna zipped past the ogre, whose attention was on me, and slashed at its heel. But thanks to its tough hide, she couldn't cut through in one go.
Then, a second time.
This time, she sliced through in quick succession.
Only then did the ogre's Achilles tendon sever, causing it to stumble and drop to one knee.
Even with its high regeneration, it couldn't heal instantly.
So, what does that mean?
"Time for a beating."
You know what? No matter how big or tough your feet are, there's one weak spot that's always going to hurt.
A pain that anyone who's experienced it knows all too well.
I took a sword out of my inventory.
And after gripping it firmly and holding it vertically,
"It's an ingrown toenail, you son of a bitch!!"
I plunged it into the ogre's toe.
More precisely, into the space between the nail and the flesh.
-UWOOOOOOOOOOOAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Its cry of pain sounded just like its roar, so it was hard to tell the difference. But judging by how much longer the roar was, it seemed to be a wail of agony.
The blade pierced the gap between the nail and the flesh, sending blood splattering everywhere.
"Hurts, doesn't it, you bastard!"
If a normal sword strike dealt damage according to the formula (Attack - Defense), then the damage from this 'ingrown toenail' was a fixed amount that ignored defense, so it was bound to hurt.
It wasn't a real ingrown toenail, of course, but since I was the one making it happen, it didn't matter.
Naturally, I kept stabbing down before its Achilles tendon could regenerate.
-Stab. Stab. Stab.
Once, twice, three times.
Right now, I am the needle of a sewing machine.
The high regeneration that had made it so strong had now turned into a disadvantage.
What would have just been a wound was now constantly healing back to normal, making the pain of the 'ingrown toenail' a hundred times worse.
-UWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"Dad told you! Huh?! To take a bath! Huh?! Didn't I?!"
"Sir Luke!!"
"Huh?"
I was gleefully stabbing away when Luna's urgent cry made me turn my head, only to see the club swinging right for me.
It was the ogre's last-ditch effort.
I hastily tried to block it by turning my sword sideways, but by the time I came to my senses, my body was already flying through the air.
The excruciating pain was a bonus.
But, a true man has a line he must deliver in a situation like this.
And that is.
"This is my escape route-eeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!"