Chapter 51: The First Letter (51)
Chapter 51: The First Letter (51)
Silence hung over the forest clearing. It was a rare occurrence. Usually, whenever Seria and I met here, the air was filled with the whistling of blades or the sharp cries of our training.
But the silence settled over the clearing now was bone-chilling. It was a precarious atmosphere, like a string pulled so taut it might snap with a sharp crack at any moment.
I stood right in the center of that precariousness, and Seria, seemingly dissatisfied even with that, kept pushing me toward the very edge.
The fragrant scent that only a woman can exude tickled the tip of my nose. My vision was filled with her harmonious features—a face I could never stop admiring, no matter how many times I saw it.
Usually, even with the most outstanding beauties, a flaw or two reveals itself when viewed from such a close distance, but Seria was the exception. She truly possessed blessed genes. Even observing Senior Delphine from a similar distance, her beauty had been so perfect that not a single flaw could be found.
Part of me wanted to just relax and appreciate her beauty. That is, if her eyes hadn't been clouded with such a dull, heavy light.
At the very least, "relaxing" while admiring her seemed impossible in this atmosphere. Looking into Seria’s eyes, where all depth had vanished, I felt a bead of cold sweat trickle down my back.
"Y-yesterday? With Senior Delphine..."
I briefly retraced the memories of last night. While unpleasant memories were mixed in, it was ultimately a productive time.
There was the expensive wine, the fact that I managed to get the last laugh against Senior Delphine, the many things I learned, and above all, Senior Delphine’s pure white naked body.
For the sake of Senior Delphine’s honor, I really ought to forget it, but the scene from that day was still deeply etched into my mind.
Human memory isn't so convenient that you can forget just because you want to, or remember just because you try. Especially not a sight as impressive as that.
No matter how much I wanted to forget, I couldn't. It was a misfortune for Senior Delphine, and a stroke of luck for me.
As I fumbled through the memories of last night, my gaze turned momentarily hazy. At that, a blue spark flickered in Seria’s eyes.
She tightened her grip on my collar and whispered in a chilling voice.
"Senior Ian... you were just thinking about another woman, weren't you?"
"No, you're the one who asked what happened with Senior Delphine yesterday!"
I shouted back, feeling wronged, but Seria didn't seem sane enough to judge things rationally in the first place. Ignoring my excuse, she lowered her head with an anxious expression.
An eerie muttering began to leak from her lips.
"I knew it, I'm being robbed again... I-I shouldn't let that happen, it's precious... I, I don't want to have things taken from me ever again..."
The murmurs, faint at first, gradually became clearer as they took on the colors of emotion.
Anxiety, anger, jealousy, hatred, inferiority, and more. A muddy torrent of all sorts of emotions tangled together, dripping heavily to the ground. Seria’s clouded eyes were shaking violently.
Her trembling voice testified to her instability. One of the hands that had been gripping my collar slowly let go. She instinctively brought her fingernails to her lips.
Snap. A small cracking sound echoed. She had bitten her nail. That alone was enough for me to realize that Seria’s state was far from normal.
I remembered hearing somewhere that bringing one's fingers to the mouth when anxious was linked to a lack of maternal affection in childhood. Was it an instinctive way to resolve the dissatisfaction of not receiving enough breast milk? Perhaps it was the same for Seria.
I didn't know why she was reacting so extremely. The only thing I knew for sure was that it was time for me to step in and stop her.
But how? I pondered the dilemma, feeling troubled.
Snap, crunch. Seria, who had been biting her nails, suddenly snapped her head up. A strange emotion flickered in her eyes. It was a somewhat spine-chilling gaze.
The sludge of her emotions spilled out.
"Senior Ian, I won't let anyone have you, at least not you...!"
Just as Seria was about to scream something, my hesitation ended.
My arms immediately wrapped around Seria’s shoulders. Seria, seemingly never expecting me to act this way, fell right into my embrace.
The soft, warm sensation brought a sense of fulfillment. I tightened my hold on her.
Seria, perhaps out of shock, simply stood there with her eyes wide open, her lips trembling.
I remembered hearing not long ago that whenever Seria was anxious, her mother would soothe her this way.
If biting her nails was related to childhood maternal affection, then I should soothe her in a way related to that as well. It was a simple thought.
The effect was immediate. Seria, who had been stiff in my arms, soon relaxed and quietly burrowed into my chest.
Her arms lightly wrapped around my waist. Her eyes, which had been swirling with a faint madness, had become as calm as the sea after a storm.
I whispered to her soothingly.
"Seria, I'm not going anywhere."
Hearing my words, Seria remained motionless for a while. However, her eyes slowly closed, and her ragged breathing settled down.
We spent a long time in silence, feeling each other's warmth.
Suddenly, Seria’s eyes flew open in surprise. Fragmented sounds escaped her lips, as if she had finally come to her senses.
"Ah, ugh, ah, ah..."
Seria’s face turned beet red. I could practically feel the heat radiating from her. It seemed the abnormal behavior she had just shown was something she did while not in her right mind.
Now that she had regained her senses, she seemed overcome with shame. I wore a bittersweet smile and teased her.
"Were you that worried?"
Seria practically jumped. As she scrambled out of my arms, a cold wind instantly filled the empty space. I felt a little lonely.
With a face flushed crimson, Seria began twirling her hair around her finger. It seemed to be a habit she had when she was troubled or extremely embarrassed.
Her eyes were spinning. She began to stutter so much it was almost pitiful.
"Ah, ugh, th-th-that is!"
"Don't worry too much. Most of those rumors are nonsense."
Me, assaulting Senior Delphine, or stripping her to humiliate her? How could that even make sense?
There were even rumors that I was Senior Delphine’s secret lover. It seemed to be because Senior Elsie had made that comment last time.
Thinking about it again made me annoyed; I wondered if I should pay Senior Elsie another visit.
Reassured by my firm denial, Seria lowered her head, looking somewhat relieved and even a bit happy.
"I... I knew it..."
Even though she said she believed me, she had looked suspicious to anyone just a moment ago.
However, I decided to stop teasing her, fearing she might actually burst into tears if I pushed further. Though, seeing the usually stoic Seria show such a wealth of expressions did make me want to tease her just a little more.
But there was something bothering me, so I hesitated, my lips parting and closing. Should I ask, or should I not?
Come to think of it, Seria and I already shared numerous secrets. It was silly to hesitate now. Especially if it was a matter serious enough to make her lose her mind temporarily.
Seria, unable to bear the embarrassment, was busy tracing lines on the ground with her foot. I asked carefully so as not to startle her further.
"...Seria, come to think of it, you said something that's been on my mind."
"Ye-yehep?! Ugh..."
I had spoken softly to be considerate, but Seria, already tense with shame, seemed startled even by that.
She answered hurriedly and ended up biting her tongue for the first time in a while. Her face turned even redder.
It was quite a cute sight. I let out a faint chuckle and asked her.
"Something about... not wanting to have things taken from you?"
"Ah..." A pained sound escaped Seria’s lips. Her eyes widened in surprise for a moment, then she grew dejected and hung her head low again.
"Did I... say that...?"
She looked gloomy. Perhaps a sad memory was involved. No, it was almost certain. Otherwise, she wouldn't have reacted that way.
If this continued, we might end up in a sea of tears again. So, I teased her to lighten the mood.
"Yeah, you did. You said you didn't want anyone to take me, at least."
"Th-th-th-that's...!"
As always, Seria gave the expected reaction.
Her slumped body stiffened once more. Her eyes darted around, unable to find a place to rest, and her mouth, unable to come up with a proper excuse, simply continued to stutter.
In the end, there was only one conclusion.
After being flustered for a long time, Seria eventually let out a long sigh. Strength drained from her body like water leaking from a broken pot.
"...That's right. Since I was young, my sister often took things away from me."
"Hmm." I swallowed a groan in silence.
I had expected as much, but hearing it directly from her made me feel uneasy. Seria seemed to feel the same way.
A lonely look crossed her eyes. She had been anxious.
She was someone who had grown up with nothing to call her own. For her, who didn't even know when the name 'Yurdina' might be taken away, I was her first friend.
She must have been terrified of losing even that. Seria’s story continued.
"Senior Ian, I've loved swords since I was a child."
"I can tell."
"But not once have I ever used a sword that I truly liked."
My eyes instinctively drifted to Seria’s waist. Come to think of it, while her sword was a high-quality item, it felt a bit lacking for something given to a child of the Yurdina family.
And this was Seria, who had been through actual combat, even going on demonic beast hunts. A sword was like an extra life. It wouldn't have been strange for her to use something of even better quality.
I recalled the fight with Senior Delphine last night. What was the dagger she used like?
It was as sharp as something crafted by a master. When the golden flash cut through my vision, it even felt like my eyes were burning. At the time, I thought it just represented Senior Delphine’s meticulousness.
But now I remembered. The warning Seria had left before I met Senior Delphine.
Whatever she wants, she takes by any means necessary.
Within the reach of the Yurdinas, the best items would have all belonged to Senior Delphine. If so, it was obvious what share Seria could take.
Whatever Delphine left behind. Seria’s feelings didn't matter. The only issue was whether it pleased Delphine or not.
It seemed my meeting with Senior Delphine had touched upon Seria’s painful memories. Seria’s lonely confession continued.
"When I was young, I saw the knights' swords and thought I wanted just one. But I didn't get it."
"Why?"
"Because my sister wanted it."
I nodded as if I understood. The Senior Delphine I saw yesterday was more than capable of that. She was a woman whose possessiveness was as strong as her competitive streak.
She probably thought it was her natural right. In her worldview, she was the winner, and Seria was the loser.
"It wasn't just swords. It was like that for most things. Even on the day my mother was kicked out, my opinion held no power whatsoever. Because Seria Yurdina is lowborn, and a loser..."
"...That doesn't mean you deserve to be treated that way."
"In the Yurdina family, that's how it must be."
My cliché comfort failed to soothe Seria. Seria looked exhausted as she answered. She seemed to have given up, yet at the same time, a subtle heat could be felt from her.
It was a firm resolve. A determination that she had no choice but to settle things in the Yurdina way.
After biting her lip for a while, she eventually forced an awkward smile. The smile of a girl who had never known how to laugh was pathetic; it didn't even look like a smile.
She was someone who had lived without friends, having everything she wanted stolen from her.
Such a life had stripped away even her laughter and happiness. It was a truly terrible story. Does everyone have such a sad story hidden deep inside?
Pretending to be composed, Seria said to me.
"How strange. I don't usually talk about myself. Why is it that in front of Senior Ian... W-well then, shall we train?"
Seria suggested that while stealing a glance at me. It seemed she intended to bury the topic and move on.
I agreed with the intention itself. Talking more would only lead to more embarrassment.
However, the reason I couldn't easily open my mouth was that the scales in my heart had finally begun to tilt.
I thought of Senior Delphine. The way she nonchalantly tore at someone's wounds, her confident attitude that such things were justified for the sake of victory.
The woman who had taken everything, including her mother, from Seria, and who had tried to trample her half-sister as she writhed in a sense of defeat.
"...Seria."
"Ye-yehet?! U-ugh..."
At my low call, Seria ended up biting her tongue again. She grew dejected once more. But for me, lost in thought, it didn't evoke much of a reaction.
I simply stared into the distance and asked Seria.
"You said you were participating in the Hunting Festival, right?"
"...? Yes, that's correct."
"Hmm." My suspicious gaze turned toward Seria. She tilted her head, not understanding why.
"Have you found all your teammates?"
Flinch. Seria’s body trembled. My question had hit the mark.
The Hunting Festival is conducted in teams of four. Naturally, Seria couldn't participate alone. That meant she had to gather teammates, but for her, whose social circle was already narrow and whose recent rumors were unfavorable, it was an impossible task.
Seria grew even more discouraged. She answered in a tiny voice.
"...N-no."
She looked gloomy. However, her mood instantly flipped at my next words.
"Should I find them for you?"
"R-really?!"
At my suggestion, Seria’s face brightened immediately. Seeing her face light up so brilliantly made me feel better as well.
It was the most dramatic change in expression I had ever seen from Seria. Her complexion was basically haughty and cold, and even when she showed emotion, it was usually just a slight movement of her eyes or the corners of her mouth.
That's how much she welcomed the proposal. I let out a chuckle and nodded.
"Yeah, I happened to have something to do at the Hunting Festival anyway."
But Seria didn't seem to be listening to the rest of what I said. She was whispering quietly to herself, her eyes sparkling with joy.
"...I knew it, Senior Ian is trustworthy. The rumors about what happened with my sister were all lies after all."
"Of course. Were you still doubting me?"
At my incredulous reaction, Seria shook her head. As if she would believe me now.
Letting out a sigh of relief, she asked me one last thing.
"Then again, it was a ridiculous rumor. Like Senior Ian seeing my sister naked..."
Twitch. My body, which had been confident until now, stiffened. Of all the exaggerated rumors, Seria had mentioned the only one that was true.
Seria looked at me with eyes full of deep trust and said.
"That's a lie too, right, Senior Ian?"
"U-uh, yeah..."
My response was awkward at best. When I couldn't even meet her eyes properly, Seria tilted her head again.
Then, the light began to vanish from her eyes once more. Her gaze sank into a deep, murky hue.
"...Senior Ian?"
"No, well... you see, Seria."
I broke into a cold sweat, not knowing what to do at Seria’s chilling voice, before eventually letting out a resigned sigh.
Then, I said with a thin smile.
"That part... is actually true."
It was the moment the light completely vanished from Seria’s aquamarine eyes.