Chapter 303: Bread and Dagger (1)
Chapter 303: Bread and Dagger (1)
Alcohol, alcohol, alcohol.
Whenever I met her, the pungent scent of liquor always brushed the tip of my nose.
She was a woman with gray hair.
Her deep blue eyes were unfocused and hazy. Her face, which would have originally been a pale white, was soaked in a delicate crimson flush.
Even at a glance, it was clear she was intoxicated.
Most drunks tend to look more unsightly the more they drink. But the woman sitting before me was different.
On the contrary, she merely exuded a sorrowful beauty, like a lone flower left behind in a snowfield.
It was thanks to her naturally stunning features.
Of course, the woman didn't seem to care about the gaze of others.
She simply tilted the bottle endlessly to fill her glass.
Emptying the glass, then filling it again.
In that repeated motion, one could even feel a subtle stubbornness.
As if drinking were her sole duty, the woman silently repeated the cycle of emptying and refilling.
It was a lonely bout of drinking.
It could even be called self-destruction carried out in silence.
As time passed, the woman exuded an increasingly desolate atmosphere.
Watching her, I thought:
This is truly hard to watch.
She was a woman who showed very little facial expression to begin with. That blunt temperament didn't change no matter how much she drank.
If anything, the woman often looked more forlorn when she was drunk.
A hollow shell that had lost its purpose in life.
That appearance reminded me of how I once was.
Or perhaps, because it felt like looking at the final destination I would eventually reach, I spoke up, feeling a surge of emotion.
"……Stop drinking."
That was the first time the woman’s hand paused.
Her eyes, resembling aquamarines, glanced toward me.
It was a color as cold as a pond in the dead of winter.
One might have flinched at that gaze, but for some reason, I wasn't afraid of her.
It was surprising, considering the woman's other name.
The Demihuman Butcher.
It was a terrifying title.
It was hard to believe such a moniker was given to such a slender beauty.
But anyone who saw her ruthlessly slaughtering elves at the front lines of the battlefield would have no choice but to think of that nickname.
Even today, dozens, hundreds of lives withered away under that cold gaze.
Every time the blue sword light traced a trajectory, blood soaked the snowfield.
No human who remembered that scenery could stand tall before that gaze.
Nevertheless, my tongue moved of its own accord.
"You have to go out to battle again tomorrow… You should get some rest, even if it's just a little."
The woman said nothing for a long time.
Like burnt ashes, not a single fragment of emotion could be felt on her face.
Only after a long while did she exhale in a faint voice.
"……Senior, were you always this meddlesome?"
"I wouldn't know."
At my indifferent reply, she downed another glass.
The remaining alcohol disappeared into her mouth in one gulp. Her blue eyes, filled with a gloomy mental image, turned toward me.
"When you drink, everything becomes blurred……."
It was like a monologue.
Glug, glug. As she poured another drink, the woman continued.
"Reason and emotion, life and death, and the past and the future… everything becomes so muddled that I can't even tell who I am anymore."
"Is that why you charge into the middle of enemy lines alone every time?"
It was a reproach mixed with a sigh.
As if it were a scolding she hadn't heard in a very long time, the woman stared at me silently.
"You'll die like that. No matter how strong you are."
"I won't die. Though I want to……."
The woman muttered in a listless tone and emptied another glass.
Clack. The glass dropped onto the table.
The woman's eyes were now harboring a profound light.
It meant she was retracing somewhere in the past.
"……Because I still have things left to do."
Her voice was strangely thick.
It created the illusion that a blue ember within the ashes had been revived. On the woman's face as she spat out those words, all sorts of emotions were swirling.
Hatred, a grudge, regret, despair, and self-loathing.
Recalling her past, it wasn't an incomprehensible sight.
That was why my heart ached as if it were being squeezed, and I felt anxious.
It was because of that that my hand grabbed the woman's wrist.
A gaze filled with displeasure turned toward me.
Regardless, I snatched the liquor bottle from her grasp.
She had been as blunt as a statue, but as soon as the alcohol was taken away, a dramatic reaction returned immediately.
"What do you think you're—!"
But before that shout could be fully exhaled.
I immediately tilted the bottle and gulped down the liquor.
The cold liquid slid down my esophagus like fire. It must have been a high-proof spirit, as I felt a burning pain.
Even so, I didn't stop and kept drinking.
Finally, when I slammed the bottle down with a thud.
The scent of the alcohol exploded like fireworks from my stomach, piercing my nose and mind. The intoxication would soon turn into steam and spread throughout my body.
It had been a long time since I drank this much.
I had cut back on alcohol since my Academy days, and perhaps because of that, the sensation of the liquor entering my system after so long felt foreign. I even felt a churning sensation in my gut.
Of course, the regret didn't last long.
Just seeing the woman staring at me blankly, as if she found it absurd, told me that my intention had hit its mark.
Phew. Wiping my mouth, I spoke.
"……Then let's drink together. Don't drink alone."
Only then did the woman swallow a hollow laugh and ask me.
"Senior… didn't you say you were returning to the Capital tomorrow morning?"
"If you're worried, drink a little less then."
In the end, the woman seemed to have run out of things to say.
She glared at me slightly, then let out a sigh as if she had no choice.
And then, she opened a new bottle.
Only after several glasses had been exchanged did the woman finally become completely intoxicated.
In fact, if she put her mind to it, she could have shaken off the intoxication as much as she wanted.
She was a powerhouse who could suppress dozens of elf soldiers and the demonic beasts of the Dark Cult single-handedly.
There was no way she couldn't drive away the drunkenness.
But I had never once seen her shake off the intoxication.
The woman wanted to be drunk.
Forever.
"Senior, you asked why I drink before going to the battlefield, right? It's the opposite, the opposite… Without, without alcohol, I can't sleep. Every night, I hear the sound of weapons……."
It was a dry lament that couldn't even hold moisture.
I tilted my glass without saying a word.
"I have nothing left now. Not my family, my name, my status, or my kin… I, I was foolish… Back then, I shouldn't have done that."
She pounded her chest as if she wanted to cry.
But no matter how much she pounded her chest, her dried-up tear ducts wouldn't burst.
The woman spoke, even imitating a sobbing voice.
"My sister, I miss my sister… I, I didn't know. What I was, what kind of existence I was… Without even knowing that, I hated her."
With that, she suddenly rolled up her sleeve.
Her slender arm was revealed, and the woman traced her finger over it.
No blade was involved in the process.
Nevertheless, the skin tore without the slightest resistance, and blood trickled down.
I tried to stand up in alarm.
If only the woman hadn't finally poured out her tears.
"……This blood!"
Drip, drip. Drops of blood fell from her fingertips.
The torn wound began to knit back together in an instant. Even seeing that sight, I couldn't say anything.
I couldn't possibly fathom her heart.
I only bit my lip and stared into those blue eyes, boiling with intense hatred.
"This blood, I loathe it……."
Wondering how I should comfort her.
I hesitantly stood up. It might not have been something to do to a junior I wasn't particularly close with, but that was the only thing that came to mind right now.
Stepping through the intoxication, forward.
The moment I stood up and took a step.
Crack! A massive fissure appeared in the world.
Fine cracks spread out from the diagonal line crossing my vision. And before long, the ground I stood on shattered like a window hit by a cannonball.
I couldn't even let out a scream.
Countless dreams floated and brushed past me in the darkness.
A snowfield where a blizzard raged.
Boiling chunks of flesh.
Elves dressed in black.
Incomprehensible sceneries dug into my vision and dizzied my mind.
And finally, the burning golden eyes of the man who grabbed my shoulder.
"……Keep this in mind. There aren't many memories you can take with you."
They flickered white as if they would burn my brain.
"I won't be able to help you for a while, so remember this one thing."
I wanted to say something, but I was suffocating.
Words simply wouldn't come out.
So I could only listen.
To the warning the man had given me once before.
"……Never face them recklessly."
With that advice as the end, the ground collapsed again, and I fell into an endless darkness.
It was then that I opened my eyes with a scream.
Gasping for breath, I gathered my frantic wits.
It was an excessively vivid dream.
Was this also the influence of the synchronization rate?
Immediately after coming to my senses, I hurriedly turned my gaze.
Toward the table placed at the head of the bed.
There, as always, an unfamiliar envelope had arrived.
Two of them, no less.
I had no choice but to let out a dazed voice.
"……What is this?"
But there was no time to hesitate.
Fumbling, I hurriedly grabbed the envelopes.
Both were made of high-quality material.
At a glance, it was impossible to tell where they had come from.
While debating which one to read first, I soon discovered something strange.
One of the envelopes had already been opened.
It was a bewildering situation.
A love letter from the future was something only I could see. I was the only one who could read its contents.
Therefore, I was the only one who could open the envelope.
However, the envelope was already torn open, and to make matters worse, upon checking the inside, the letter that should have been there was missing.
I could only let out a hollow laugh.
"Ha."
My head was already starting to feel complicated.
But for now, there was too little information.
I carefully opened the remaining envelope.
Fortunately, there were several sheets of letter paper inside.
My eyes silently began to scan the lines of text.