Man vs. Wild - 3
Yi Ji-seung's appearance was a bit grotesque and enigmatic, but he didn't refuse the invitation. Better to be an honored guest invited by Baek-su-mun than an uninvited intruder crashing the party—it gave me the upper hand in any conversation.
"Me, me too—I'll lick you!"
- Kki-ing!?
Still, I couldn't help worrying if it was wise to engage with a sect whose beast obsession had plunged into the abyss. Was it really okay to bring Kki-ing-i and Kki-ong-i to their headquarters? What if dozens of them came swarming, begging to lick? What if the deer came back to Hengshan traumatized by human-wave tactics?
But the dilemma didn't last long. Sure, Baek-su-mun left a bizarre first impression, but flip it around—it wasn't ferocious or menacing. Far better than sects that preyed on the common folk or stonewalled the authorities. Even if their "excessive" affection exceeded my wildest imagination.
"Then we'll come right at the hour of the snake tomorrow! Thank you for accepting, my lord!"
"Right. See you tomorrow."
The hour of the snake was roughly 9 to 11 a.m.—time to grab breakfast and head out. I nodded in agreement.
With that, Yi Ji-seung and the Baek-su-mun disciples departed leisurely, having groped Kki-ing-i and Kki-ong-i to their hearts' content.
"You can come out now."
- Shh, shiiik...
Samshik, who had fled from my sleeve all the way up to my forearm, slithered cautiously back toward my wrist. Thank goodness. If Baek-su-mun had spotted him, the little guy would've keeled over from all the excessive petting and handling.
They must not know about Samshik.
Of course, rumors of a three-headed snake in the hands of the Sichuan Prefect would've reached Baek-su-mun's ears. With their intelligence network across Sichuan, they couldn't have missed the bait scattered everywhere to lure the Tang duo. But the part where Samshik's ownership transferred to me after capturing the duo? That was known only to a tiny circle—the Nang-jung Wang, the Prefect, and the leaders of our two sects.
Way too classified for a Yunnan-based sect to know.
"Stay hidden for the time being. Don't come out."
- Shiiik!Shik!
- Sheeek!
- Shuuuuk!
Thanks to that, Samshik enjoyed some peace while the two deer endured the Baek-su-mun disciples' affections. For a creature who preferred dark solitude, it was practically a lifesaver.
- Kki-ing.
- Shiiik...!
Then Kki-ing-i, who had been staring laser-focused at my sleeve, nudged it with his antler. A faint tap, but fatal for the frail, puny Samshik—it fluttered to the ground like a paper doll.
- Shik! Shiiik!
- Sheeek!
- Shuuuuk!
Samshik reared up all three heads in protest at the unprovoked attack, but Kki-ing-i just licked them.
- Shh, shiiik...
Assaulted by a tongue vastly larger than itself, Samshik rapidly lost the will to fight. A truly pitiable sight. When the size gap was that extreme, mere existence felt like violence.
"Why bully the kid? You're the elder—take good care of him."
I shoved away the relentlessly licking Kki-ing-i and tucked Samshik back into my sleeve. Truth be told, I had a hunch why. He and Kki-ong-i had suffered the beast lovers' onslaught, but the "baby" had hidden in my arms and dodged the storm. Jealousy, plain and simple.
Baek-su-mun's caresses sat somewhere between mania and genuine affection.
"Samshik's innocent. Don't take it out on him."
- Kkiiing...
- Kki-ong...
At my words, Kki-ing-i and Kki-ong-i let out mournful cries as they circled me. Consoling the weary, sulky pair took five servings of dongpo pork.
The next day, at the hour of the snake, only Yi Ji-seung showed up at the inn.
"All the disciples wanted to escort you, my lord, but someone had to mind the kids if we all left. It's my honor to serve you."
Was it my imagination? His words said "honor to serve you," but to my ears, it sounded like "thrilled to be with the spirit beasts."
I let it slide. Baek-su-mun cherished beasts, but they didn't seem the type to disdain humans.
"Baek-su-mun's at the southern tip, right? It'll be quite the journey."
"No worries. From Omongbu to the sect leader's Sama Bu, we have several outposts. I'll ensure a comfortable trip!"
Yi Ji-seung's bold declaration made Kki-ing-i's body flinch. Multiple outposts meant... multiple swarms of disciples going feral at the sight of the deer.
This'll be a rough ride.
I patted Kki-ing-i's neck absently. Still, it's all love. Hang in there.
The disciple overseeing Omongbu sent a pigeon dispatch.
The Jwa-cheom Do-eosa has arrived in Omongbu. As per intelligence from Sichuan, he is raising the two deer spirit beasts, their fur a pristine white with a lustrous sheen reminiscent of our veteran handlers. This signifies the inspector's own affection and care for beasts.
Word that the peripatetic Jwa-cheom Do-eosa, touring the realm, had passed through Sichuan into Yunnan.
The spirit beasts follow the inspector like their own parents—what a beautiful sight. Thus, his meeting with our sect will be a blessing and stimulus for both sides.
And that he was coming to Sama Bu with the inspector. How they'd arranged the escort was a mystery, but the key point was a high-ranking official visiting our fledgling sect—
"The spirit beasts follow him like parents! What an awe-inspiring tale!"
"Spirit beasts are noble and capricious. For them to follow the inspector speaks to his exemplary character."
"A most esteemed guest graces us!"
I was momentarily speechless watching the elders burst into laughter. What? Were we reading different dispatches? It clearly said a top Dochalwon official was coming—why the glee?
The Dochalwon can crush even ancient powers.
I might be in Yunnan now, but I'd once roamed the Central Plains broadening my horizons. I knew full well the bureaucracy's iron grip on murim and the Dochalwon's savagery. Anyone in murim feared the officials—especially avoiding the Dochalwon's gaze was a daily prayer. They were existences above the heavens, smashing fellow bureaucrats if needed.
Easier to assume a murimite caught by Dochalwon had no future.
And among them, a bona fide high-up like the Jwa-cheom Do-eosa was coming. No laughing matter.
These beast-brained fools.
A sigh nearly escaped me. Our Baek-su-mun lived alongside beasts, harnessing their power to better the world. Beasts were our comrades, children, family.
But we humans couldn't stoop to beast-level pettiness and intellect. Viewing everything through a beast lens was a problem.
"Enough."
I finally cut off the elders' laughter. If they were all lunatics, the sole sane one had to step up.
"When an honored guest arrives, we prepare with utmost sincerity. We must show him everything and boldly proclaim our righteous cause."
Better to lay it all bare than skulk suspiciously before a Dochalwon man. We'd done nothing to irk the throne anyway. A sect that aided the people without harm. One that cooperated eagerly with officials, supplying the beasts they desired. That was our position—and the way to dodge the Dochalwon's sharp blade—
"Indeed! Show him all our charges and reveal our handling methods!"
?
"If a central official learns our ways, they'll spread across the Central Plains in no time! Then beasts everywhere will get top care!"
??
"He might even share his personal beast-handling secrets, moved by our sincerity!"
"Why stop at handling? He could permit us to capture and manage spirit beasts!"
"Haha, just hearing it sets the heart racing."
????
What the hell.
My head throbbed. I'd meant bare it all to soften the inspection's blow, but they heard "flaunt our methods"?
Not even surprising anymore. Experience had taught me these weren't warriors or sect elders—they were glorified breeders.
Too many ordeals to get worked up over this. Yeah, I'm fine. Totally fine.
... I'm not fine.
How could I be? Facing a once-in-a-lifetime crisis like an inspection, and I was the only one truly tense?
"Best to welcome the Jwa-cheom Do-eosa with the elephants?"
"He rides deer spirits—must love deer!"
"Fool! True animal lovers don't play favorites! Don't assume the inspector is narrow-minded!"
"Quite right... Elder Pyong speaks wisdom!"
I closed my eyes quietly amid their chatter. Wanted to plug my ears too, but as sect leader, duty bound me. My last shred of reason and responsibility.
Where do they find these people.
Sure, for explosive growth, I'd recruited anyone who truly cherished beasts, quirks be damned. Not a wrong call.
But this? A whole sect of extreme weirdos? Too much.
Calamity I invited myself.
Tears welled up. Would Baek-su-mun collapse first, or would I die of frustration? Hard to say.