Small but Certain Happiness
The sun had already climbed to its highest seat in the sky.
The sweat still hadn't cooled, and my shirt clung damp against my back. Even so, my steps felt strangely light.
Considering we'd swept through two packs of goblins that morning, it wouldn't have been strange for my arms and legs to give out—but my body was still holding up just fine.
The moment I stepped into the guild, the rustle of ledgers turning and the clink of coins reached my ears first.
Luce looked up from her ledger as we approached.
"You're early. Good work out there."
"Thank you. Honestly, Luce, you're the only one who ever acknowledges it."
Luce met my eyes and smiled softly.
"You always look like you've been through it, Siyun. Still, you look a little better today than yesterday."
Mari snorted beside me.
"A little? He walks around with it written all over his face."
"Hey, at least we came back alive, right?"
"That much is true."
Kaya answered briefly.
"Everyone did well this morning."
I found the corner of my mouth lifting for no good reason as I pulled mana stones from the leather pouch and set them one by one on the settlement counter.
Luce sorted them with quick fingertips.
Regular goblin mana stones: eleven.
Warrior-type: two.
Shaman-type: one.
"Including the base pay for the outer patrol, that's five silver total. Split three ways, that's one silver and eight copper each."
"Oh..."
"Want me to include the copper with it?"
"Yes, please."
Clink.
The sound of the coins sliding toward me stuck strangely in my ears.
Mari gathered her share as she spoke.
"Not bad for a single morning."
"Right? The fruits of our labor and sweat."
"What are you even saying. Your whole face loosens up every time we settle."
"Of course it does. This decides what lunch looks like!"
Kaya laughed quietly.
"That's true enough."
Adding what I'd already had left me with three silver and nine copper.
After lunch that'll leave about six copper.
The math spun so naturally through my head that I laughed without meaning to.
This is what they call small but certain happiness.
When I pushed open the door of Sunset Hearth, the familiar heat and smell rolled over us all at once.
I'd been in and out plenty of times, but until now only the food and the seats had ever registered. After every fight I was always starving first, and the place was usually packed enough to scramble anyone's attention.
I'd probably brushed past the faces moving between kitchen and floor a few times before, but today was the first time one of them truly caught my eye.
A woman with dark honey-brown hair tied neatly back. Deep green eyes, freckles lightly dusted across her cheeks, and a mouth that turned up cleanly at the corners. Her face leaned more toward lively than demure.
The moment she saw us, the server set water cups down with sharp little clacks.
"Oh? You lot again?"
"There's always more work."
Kaya answered evenly.
"Fine by me. Earn a lot, come here, eat a lot, and leave."
Mari snorted a laugh.
"I like that logic."
Only then did the server turn her gaze my way.
"You're that outsider who always comes in with them, right?"
"Ah—yes."
"Finally getting a proper look at you. I'm Nia. Around here, you can pretty much figure I handle most of it."
Her speech slipped into casual address without a second thought, and though her hands never stopped moving, nothing about her felt frazzled. Direct, brisk—the kind of person whose presence arrived before any shyness could.
One look was enough. Nia carried a serious share of what kept this place running.
"You're early today?"
"Morning went pretty well."
"Oh, so even a regular person can throw their weight around a little?"
"Haha—does it look that way?"
Nia looked me over once, then glanced at Mari.
"Does he fit with you guys?"
"More than I expected, honestly."
"A regular person keeping up with your pace?"
"He's not forcing it."
Kaya lifted her water cup and added,
"Not bad."
Nia gave a short laugh as she looked back at me.
"You just got praised."
"I'm a little surprised myself?"
"Good. Means you should eat more. You're heading out again this afternoon, right?"
"Any recommendations for today?"
"Yeah. The menu for starving idiots."
Nia turned and vanished toward the kitchen.
A short while later, fresh-baked bread, meat, and a thick soup settled onto the table.
After that, only the sound of spoons moved between us.
Nia passed by, glanced at our table, and laughed like she couldn't believe it.
"You really were hungry, huh."
I tore off a big bite of bread as I answered.
"Ever since yeshterday... it'sh been like thish."
"What?"
"Dinner was... pretty plain."
Nia looked at me for a beat, then snorted.
"Nobody starved you. Eat plenty."
While the bowls emptied one by one, no one said much of anything.
Nia passed again, saw the empty dishes, and spoke briefly.
"More?"
"No, I'm full. That was really good!"
"Alright. Come back safe this afternoon."
By the time I stood up, the next stretch of the day was already slotted into my head.
Morning with Garen. Daytime commissions. Meals at Sunset Hearth.
A sequence that had felt nothing but foreign only a few days ago now attached itself the moment I rose from my seat.
The afternoon commission was far more exhausting than the morning.
It was a simple sweep of the outer forest in a wide loop, but the makeup of the enemies was more annoying than their numbers.
Four regulars, one scout-type that darted through the brush, one archer-type shooting from the trees, three warrior-types, and four Ironfangs on top of that.
"Tch. Why are there so many."
Mari muttered, irritation thick in her voice.
"Don't rush in. We just need to clean them up calmly."
Kaya said it short and clear.
"Yes, ma'am. I'll work hard enough not to die!"
That was what I said—but in practice I was ridiculously busy.
Two Ironfangs charged first like living battering rams while arrows came flying from behind. The scout rode the brush, and the three warriors pushed straight up the middle.
Still, we didn't flail. Mari sealed off paths with magic, Kaya called the angles, and I slipped into the gaps they opened. It was messy, but it never broke.
When the fighting ended, all three of us were soaked through with sweat.
Mari wiped her forehead and tossed the words out.
"Afternoon was a bit rough."
"We still pulled a lot of mana stones, though."
"I knew you'd say that."
Kaya laughed under her breath.
"It was hard, but it was clean."
After that, the walk back held almost no conversation. We just walked.
By the time we finished settling at the guild, the weight of the leather pouch felt clearly different from before.
We handled dinner at Sunset Hearth as well.
It wasn't the same frantic eating as lunch. After finishing the afternoon commission and coming back, everyone spoke a little less, and the warm air inside the restaurant pressed gently down on the fatigue.
The moment Nia saw us, she set beer mugs on the empty table.
"Drink."
"Beer?"
I lifted the mug and looked up at her.
"Is this on the house, by any chance?"
I asked it slyly, and Nia snorted.
"Yeah. On the house."
"Whoa!"
"I still owe Roy his life, after all."
I blinked, mug still in hand.
"Huh? What's your connection with Roy?"
"Why, you curious?"
"Of course I'm curious."
Nia wiped the table absently, then shrugged like it was nothing.
"We grew up together. Childhood friends."
"Oh..."
"And later we promised to get married, too."
"Ohh!"
That one actually surprised me.
Nia seemed amused by my reaction and set down another mug.
"Well, not right now. Who throws a wedding in times like these. The Demon King's army is still stirring up trouble all over."
"The Demon King's army?"
The words jumped out of me first.
Goblins were things you cut down right in front of you. Ironfangs were beasts you could see. Both were problems you solved by fighting what was in front of your face.
But the word army was different. It meant that somewhere in this world, a larger battlefield I hadn't even set foot near was already turning.
Nia propped her chin on her hand.
"What, first time hearing it?"
"No, just... hearing the name doesn't make it feel real."
"Doesn't have to feel real for it to be real. I hear the front lines are still a complete mess. This place is far enough away that it's a little quieter."
Kaya quietly lifted her mug and took it up.
"Around Bresen it's still better than most places. That doesn't mean it's safe."
Mari scoffed through her nose.
"Which is why people earn when they can and eat while they're still alive."
Nia nodded at that.
"Exactly. So for now we work, we eat, we hold on. When peace comes, we can throw the wedding then."
She said it lightly, but the sincerity was plain. Every time Roy came up, the light in Nia's eyes shifted just a little.
I raised my mug for no particular reason.
"Shall we toast?"
"Yeah. Let's toast."
"Cheers!"
"Cheers."
The mugs tapped lightly together.
When I swallowed a mouthful of beer, a clean, cool brightness rode down my throat behind the bitter edge.
"This is good. Thanks for the free round!"
Nia grinned.
"Nah. I'm the one who should be thanking you. Thanks for saving Roy."
I looked down at the mug for a second.
"...Hearing you say it like that is a little embarrassing."
Mari took a swallow of beer and dropped the words casually.
"Nothing to be embarrassed about. It's true."
Kaya added quietly,
"She's right. Without Siyun back then, it would've been dangerous."
Nia nodded, nudged the mug a little closer, and turned away.
I stayed where I was for a moment, hands wrapped around the mug.
The beer was good, sure—but the atmosphere itself was better.
The feeling of having lived through the day seemed pressed down into this one small cup.
By the time I finished washing at the public baths and returned to the Healing Sanctuary, the night air had turned fairly cold.
From deeper in the corridor, High Priest Edrick glanced at me and tossed out a remark.
"Overdid it again."
"Come on, I didn't overdo it that much."
"Never met a man who said that and was actually fine."
"Are you worried about me right now?"
"Stop talking nonsense and go sleep."
"Yes, sir. Good night."
Back in my room, I pulled out the money I'd earned and counted it.
Four silver. Eight copper.
Watching the numbers stack up little by little eased the fatigue some. Today hadn't been a bad day either.
The sixth day flew past in a blur.
In the morning I crossed wooden swords with Garen. He still drove me without mercy, but today I held through the first exchange. I blocked, redirected, and even if I was late, I stayed with him.
During the day we worked the forest. I read the formations, and when Mari opened a path on Kaya's call, I drove into the gap. By now the sequence locked into place without anyone needing to speak.
The days were similar, but they weren't boring. They were hard, but I was shaking less than before, and I was getting hurt less than before.
That fact felt especially sharp today.
The day turned over like that. Even on the sixth day, this routine still felt purely good.
When I returned to my room and spilled the coins out, I felt the weight that had grown since the day before sitting in my palm.
Six silver. Two copper.
The money was stacking up.
The seventh day was loose.
The forest was quiet today. Some days were like that.
In the morning, four regulars and one warrior-type. In the afternoon, a scout and a single Ironfang.
By the numbers it was lighter, but we still didn't get sloppy.
If anything, the order was clearer now.
Who moved first, who made the opening, who finished it. That sequence was sticking more to the body than the head.
By the time I returned to the Healing Sanctuary, night had already fallen. The inside was unusually quiet.
From the dining room, Sister Riena was clearing soup bowls when she looked up and saw me.
"You got hurt less today."
"How can you tell that right away?"
"Your color. You look much better than usual."
"So do I look like a different person today?"
"...Quite a bit."
I paused for a second.
"Eh... really?"
"Yes. Really."
She said it gently, and all of it was true.
"Have you had any water?"
"No, not yet..."
"I thought so."
Riena had already pushed a water cup toward me before I finished answering. She was the kind of person whose hands moved ahead of her words.
"Thank you."
"Of course. Be careful again tomorrow."
I couldn't tell whether the words were a greeting or a warning. Probably both.
A little later, the young priest Ren came hurrying down the hall with a water bottle, then stopped short when he saw me.
"Ah—I was just about to bring this to you."
"Sister Riena already gave me some."
"...I see."
Ren stood there blankly for a moment with the bottle still in his hands.
"You look a little better today than yesterday."
"Oh? So you've developed an eye for people too?"
"High Priest Edrick told me to look at the face first."
"You're learning good things."
"I'm... not sure if it's a good thing."
Ren smiled faintly. There was still a boyish cast to him, but he never let go of what he was carrying until the end.
Back in my room again, I spilled the coins out.
Seven silver. Four copper.
I was still a long way from ten silver. The iron sword's debt was still sitting there, after all.
Even so, it wasn't bad.
I'd walked the forest, swung a sword, come back alive, and gathered this much.
That one fact alone was enough.