An Unfamiliar Ceiling
An unfamiliar ceiling.
The moment I opened my eyes, I just stared up at it for a while.
A worn wooden frame. Whitewashed plaster walls shot through with the finest of cracks. A thin wash of light seeping in through a small window.
It felt like I'd only just woken up. No—more like I'd shut my eyes and opened them again without even a chance to dream.
"…What the hell."
A slightly cracked voice slipped out between my lips.
Morning already?
Yesterday my head had been splitting open, my body had been dead weight, and the second my back hit the bed in the healing sanctuary's guest room, my consciousness had just… cut out.
Subjectively, it felt like less than an hour had passed. But dawn light was already spread thin across the room.
An unfamiliar ceiling.
Unfamiliar air.
An unfamiliar bed.
And an unfamiliar world.
That was when everything from yesterday came flooding back at once.
"Haah…"
The hand that had been covering my forehead slid slowly down.
I'd gotten the Dimensional Archive, become Alpha Mail, crossed through god-knows-how-many insane worlds, and somehow ended up here.
I've been through way too much… this is seriously rough…
But then again, it wasn't actually that bad.
Hmm… sex.
The fact that the first word to surface in my head first thing in the morning was sex left me no choice but to close my eyes again.
"Right. A man needs consistency…"
And the second I muttered that—
Knock. Knock.
Someone was at the door.
"Siyun."
Kaya's voice.
"You're up, right? Don't keep Garen waiting."
I tried to sit up on reflex—and froze solid.
"Ah."
My eyes drifted slowly downward.
And went wide.
Wow.
I was genuinely stunned.
Morning wood.
By definition: the state in which blood flow to the corpora cavernosa increases during sleep, leaving a man's member unconsciously rigid upon waking. Generally treated as one indicator that vascular function, male hormones, and the nervous system are all operating within healthy parameters.
In simple terms: you open your eyes in the morning and your masculinity has already clocked in for work.
But this… this was something that had left the "normal range" so far behind it felt almost incomprehensible.
This wasn't healthy. This was ready to punch through my pants and go out into society on its own.
I sat there on the bed, stiff as a board, briefly denying reality.
…Hold on.
Had I ever looked my own lower half this squarely in the face?
It was big. Insanely big. I'd wanted that, sure. But I never expected it to show up as such a perfect finished product.
Impressive. No, seriously. I might even have been a little moved.
"…Hmm."
From outside the door, Kaya called again.
"Siyun?"
"Ah—yes. I'm up."
My voice cracked a little.
"Then come out."
"About that…"
"What? Is something wrong?"
"I'm not quite ready yet."
A brief silence.
The air outside the door seemed to stop, just the slightest bit.
"Ready?"
"Yes."
"You haven't even washed your face?"
"That's also true."
"…Then?"
I squeezed my eyes shut.
How was I supposed to explain this.
My morning wood won't go down. I'm currently in a socially compromised state. As a man, I've simply become too healthy, you see?
Absolutely not.
"…There's a bit of a situation."
From outside, Kaya's voice dropped very low.
"Suspicious."
And the second she finished saying that, the doorknob moved.
"Shit! Wait—hold on!"
I practically flew to the door and grabbed it with both hands.
Rattle!
Kaya pulled from the outside.
I held on for dear life from the inside.
"Why are you blocking it?"
"No, seriously, just give me a second!"
"Why. What is it."
"I'm a little… right now!"
"A little what."
"I mean—it's just a little like that!"
Kaya's voice went colder.
"Open the door."
Rattle!
Rattle!
"Could you wait just a little longer?"
"You've got a real talent for sounding shady."
Kaya put more force into it.
I swallowed a curse.
No, what the hell. Why is she this strong.
Every time the door rattled, my heart rattled with it. This wasn't a life-or-death problem, but it was a live combat scenario with a man's dignity on the line.
"Kaya?"
Now Mari's voice mixed in.
"What are you doing?"
"No idea. He won't open the door."
"Is he trying to run?"
"Could be."
I wanted to slam my forehead into the door.
"…I'm not."
"Then open it."
"No, like I said…"
"What is it."
"It's a little hard to say."
"Even more suspicious."
Rattle!
Rattle!
Rattle!
Fortunately, in the meantime, the morning's great vital force was settling down with startling speed.
"Hah… damn."
I closed my eyes and let out a long breath.
Alright. Social functionality restored.
In the end I exhaled a long sigh and let go of the door.
It swung open half a beat too fast.
Whoosh.
Kaya peered in first, and right behind her Mari stuck her face in.
Both of them swept the room with their eyes.
The bed.
The table.
The washbasin.
And me, standing there perfectly fine.
Kaya narrowed her eyes.
"So what on earth was that about."
"It's a little hard to… there was a situation."
"Even more suspicious."
"That's why I said it's hard to talk about."
"If you don't talk, I'm going to keep suspecting you."
"Well… I guess that's something I'll just have to live with."
Mari snorted a laugh.
"This kid is seriously weird."
"I know that too."
"Shut up."
Kaya stared a moment longer, then finally sighed.
"Fine. As long as you didn't run, that's enough. Get out here. If you keep Garen waiting, you're the only one who'll suffer more."
"…I'm already suffering."
"That's your problem."
The short commotion ended, and when I stepped outside, the dawn air hit me.
It was cool.
It smelled like a village close to the forest. Wet earth, grass, the scent of wood just before morning sun starts to warm it. Birds called briefly in the distance, and the wind ran once through the leaves and was gone.
In the eastern sky, a very thin gold was spreading. The sun hadn't fully risen, but it was clearly coming up. Sunrise light filtered between the trees and painted the village rooftops in a pale wash of color.
…Nice. Feels like I went camping for the first time in ages.
It was too good.
Just the fact that this wasn't a world that tried to kill me the second I arrived made this morning feel insanely good.
The problem was, feeling good was one thing, and stares were another.
As the villagers started moving one by one, eyes began gathering in my direction.
Black hair.
Black eyes.
An unfamiliar East Asian face.
Of course people were going to stare.
"Is that the guy from yesterday?"
"I heard he's an outsider."
"He's with Roy's party."
"Look at that hair color…"
"And his face is…… slurp."
Who the hell just slurped.
The muttering rode the morning air and drifted past.
I muttered to myself only.
Ahh. Already becoming the idol of an isekai world, am I.
Mari, right beside me, said dryly,
"Must be nice."
"What is?"
"Everyone's staring."
"Hmm… maybe I'm just too good-looking~"
"You're already annoying and it's not even noon."
"Thank you."
"That wasn't a compliment?"
"Then… jealousy?"
"Kaya, can I just burn him?"
"No."
"Why!"
"Garen will probably do it first."
At that, I shut my mouth.
So much for feeling good.
We headed straight for the Roenheim Guild Hall.
It was early enough that the guild wasn't fully crowded yet. Still, the doors were already open, and from inside came the sounds of people getting ready.
Someone tidying the reception desk. Someone chewing breakfast. A few early-rising adventurers checking over their weapons.
The guild before the real rush.
Maybe that was why I stood out even more.
"That's the guy?"
"The one Garen wants to see?"
"He's getting wrecked on day one."
"That's the one who saved Roy's party yesterday?"
I lifted my chin and pretended not to hear.
If it's already like this, I might as well keep my dignity.
But the second we stepped out into the training yard behind the guild, there was no time for dignity or anything else.
A wide stretch of packed dirt.
Weapon racks.
Wooden dummies.
And Garen, standing dead center.
He said nothing.
A solid frame.
A stance with zero excess.
Just by standing there, the space around him seemed to go quiet with him.
The moment he saw me, he gave a short wave of his hand.
"Come."
I blinked once.
"Yes? Just like that?"
"Shut up."
Garen tossed a wooden training sword toward me.
I fumbled and caught it.
"No, if we could talk for a second—"
"Hold it."
"…Excuse me?"
"Come at me."
Ah. Hold the weapon?
Garen picked up a training shield and a short wooden baton instead of a sword.
My face twisted the second I saw them.
No—how am I supposed to break through Defense 300 Garen!
How was a twenty-first-century convenience store part-timer supposed to beat a fundamental isekai warrior.
From the spectators watching in the back, someone snickered.
"Oof, Garen's got him."
"That brat's not gonna run crying, is he?"
"Haha! Looks like we've got ourselves some morning entertainment!"
"Look, he already pulled the shield. It's over."
Outside the training yard, Mari stood with her arms crossed and clicked her tongue. Kaya watched without a word.
Garen settled the shield into his grip, held the baton short, and said,
"I told you to come at me."
"…Pardon?"
"If you don't, I will."
"I like that option even less."
I adjusted my grip on the wooden sword awkwardly and stepped forward.
Garen moved first.
Fast.
He wasn't coming in to block my sword. The shield covered my vision first.
I raised the blade on reflex—and in that exact moment the edge of the shield knocked the wooden sword aside and shook my wrist free.
Thwack!
My hand rang.
"Agh!"
Next the baton cracked against the side of my thigh.
"Slow."
"That fucking hurts!"
"Real combat hurts more."
And then he was in again.
Garen shoved with the shield, blocked my sight, and rocked my balance. The baton found every gap—back of the hand, wrist, thigh, ribs—with uncanny precision.
Thwack.
Crack.
Thok.
"Feet."
Crack!
"Eyes."
Thwack!
"Wrist."
Thok.
"Again."
"No—wait, hold on…!"
I kept rolling across the dirt.
Laughter burst out behind me.
"It's over."
"He's a complete beginner!"
"That guy saved Roy? That green little brat?"
"Haha! At least he's got guts for not running!"
"He's gonna be rolling all day!"
I gritted my teeth and brushed the dirt off.
You bastards…
I went in again.
This time I thrust the wooden sword first. Garen didn't dodge—he caught it on the shield and let it slide. The second my blade was forced out wide, the baton cracked the back of my hand.
"Agh!"
"Your openings are huge."
"Could you at least phrase the feedback a little nicer?"
"No."
I got hit again.
But after rolling a few more times, something strange started happening.
Maybe my body was figuring it out first.
My feet found where to plant. I could see the direction my waist needed to turn. I started getting a feel for where the shield was going to shove. Bit by bit, I could read when the baton was hunting my openings and when it was going for my legs.
Not completely. Just… getting hit a little less.
But that difference was bigger than I expected.
Garen's shield came in again.
On reflex I laid the wooden sword flat and let the shield slide off. I couldn't stop it fully, but I avoided a direct hit.
I stepped sideways and drove the tip of the wooden sword in.
Whoosh.
The blade reached near Garen's side.
Right before contact, the baton tapped my wrist and ruined the angle of the thrust.
But this time I didn't go down.
Garen's brow moved, just for a fraction of a second.
"That one was a little better."
One of the spectators in the back muttered,
"Oh?"
"Did he just deflect that?"
"Garen almost got tagged once?"
I was breathing hard.
I was sweating, my whole body was buzzing, and my wrists throbbed.
But the more I got hit, the faster my body was learning.
Heavenly Demon Physique… this trait's way better than I thought, isn't it?
Garen came in again.
This time the shield came straight up under my chin.
I raised the wooden sword on pure reflex and blocked—and with a sharp crack, my whole arm rang.
In the next instant, Garen's leg hooked my ankle.
Thud.
I went face-first into the dirt.
"Kek! Sand!"
"Your upper body floats."
"That wouldn't have happened if someone hadn't been only attacking my face with a shield!"
"Stop whining."
More laughter erupted from the back.
"Whoa, he really is rolling."
"Weird that he hasn't run yet."
"At least he's got guts, going up against Garen!"
"Haha! Tougher than he looks!"
I ground my teeth and got up again.
Embarrassing. It hurt like hell.
But… weirdly, I can kind of do this?
Once I got shoved by the shield and still didn't fall. Once I took a hit from the baton and still managed to graze the rim of the shield with the tip of my sword.
It was a difference that meant nothing—and yet it was completely different from before.
Garen was watching all of it.
And then, at some point, he stopped moving.
I stood there gasping. My hands were shaking. My arms were numb, and my wrists and the backs of my hands were already bruising from how many times they'd been struck. Sweat ran down the back of my neck.
"…Is that it?"
"What. You want more."
"Um… no. Please spare me that kind of cruelty."
"No."
A few people laughed again.
Garen looked down at the shield and baton, then back at me.
"Your fundamentals are a mess."
"…I figured."
"You've never been properly taught."
"That too."
"But you learn fast."
I caught my breath and listened.
"Doesn't seem like you're completely empty when it comes to real combat sense."
"I wouldn't call it combat sense so much as… almost dying for real yesterday."
"That is real combat."
Fair enough.
Mari muttered under her breath, arms still crossed.
"Tch."
Kaya added shortly,
"He'll be usable."
"Is 'he'll be usable' something you say about a person…"
Garen wrapped things up right there.
"Formal registration is on hold."
"What does that mean?"
"I need observation and confirmation for a while."
"No, if you could listen—"
"Until Roy recovers, you'll be placed temporarily in Roy's party."
A brief silence fell.
Mari reacted first.
"What? Why do we have to take in this outsider?"
"Because you're the one complaining the most."
"That's the reason?"
"Watch him yourself and decide."
"Wow, your personality is really…"
Mari scowled, but she didn't push further.
Kaya let out a small sigh and accepted it.
"Understood."
Muttering spread through the crowd again.
"He actually put him in Roy's party."
"An outsider?"
"Roy's party is seriously unlucky!"
"But his face is pretty decent, at least…"
"Why'd a kid like that come crawling out of a goblin den."
I ignored the whispers and looked down at the wooden sword.
My body was bruised and scraped all over, but something deeper inside felt a little different. Separate from the pain of getting hit, the sensations I'd just learned were still sitting in the corners of my body.
Garen said one last thing.
"That's all for today."
"…Thank you?"
"Nothing to thank me for."
"Then should I apologize?"
"Come back tomorrow and I'll think about it."
Oh?
I saw it for a second… the possibility of a tsundere!
Garen turned on his heel and walked off. People naturally parted to make a path for him. Watching his back, I returned the wooden sword to the rack.
Kaya came over to me.
"…You held up well."
"Is that how it looked?"
"Yeah. Most people get thrown out and run."
"Hmm…"
I grinned and held up a V-sign in front of Kaya.
Mari cut in flatly.
"…What are you doing? Anyway, this afternoon I'll show you around inside the guild. Don't try to run off or get any weird ideas."
"Do I look like the kind of person who would do that?"
"Yes."
"You thought about that before answering, right?"
"Do I need to think about it?"
I swallowed a dry laugh and looked back toward the guild beyond the training yard.
The morning sun had climbed higher without my noticing, and the guild side was getting loud.
People laughing. Weapons clashing. An argument drifting over from the reception desk.
The sounds of a living world.
I opened my palm once—sweat and blood-slick.
It hurt. It was a little embarrassing.
But somehow, I could handle it.
I really could.