What Happened in the Mental World
The moment I opened my eyes, there was nothing.
No light. No sound. Not even sensation.
Just an endless black void.
"...What the hell."
My voice didn't carry. I had clearly opened my mouth, but the sound went nowhere.
I tried to move. I could feel my toes, yet there was no floor beneath them.
Was I floating in the dark? Or...
Was I dead?
My heart dropped.
"Team Leader?"
No answer.
"Doyun?"
"Nova?"
Silence. Nothing came back.
My breathing grew ragged.
"...Yuri?"
Still nothing.
My mind went blank.
"Don't tell me..."
My voice shook.
"I didn't go back, did I..."
The original world. That hellish reality where my sins still lived. The room where I had been left alone all over again.
My throat closed up.
"Hah... hah..."
And then—
Zzzt.
A noise like static crackled from somewhere.
Then—
Click.
Light snapped on. My eyes stung and fluttered against it.
"Huh...?"
It was a room. A familiar, ordinary room.
An unmade bed. A game console box shoved into the corner. Even the posters on the wall.
"What... is this?"
My gaze drifted slowly across it all.
My room. The room I had lived in back in the original world. Exact in every detail — the smell, the layout, even where the dust had settled.
"No... this can't... this place..."
I stepped back.
And then—
Creak.
Someone shifted the chair that, in my memory, sat behind me.
My heart plummeted. I turned around.
At the desk, someone sat with their back to me. Black hair. A familiar build. And a voice so familiar it was identical to my own.
"You're late."
The head turned slowly. And I froze solid.
"What...?"
It was me. Mirror-perfect. But looking closer, the eyes were different — black pupils inverted over pure white sclera.
Inverted eyes.
Goosebumps raced over my entire body.
"Danaksuseon...? Is that you?"
The name slipped out before I could stop it.
The being gave a short, dry laugh.
"So you do know."
A calm voice. Listening to it settled the heart in a way that felt almost unnatural — like standing alone inside an old cathedral.
"Why... are you here?"
"Wrong question."
He rose slowly from the chair.
"Not why am I here. You should be asking why you ended up here."
"What?"
He walked toward me without a sound. Not human. Not quite a monster either. Something standing precisely on the line between the two.
"You were supposed to die."
"The first time I saw you, under ordinary circumstances, I would have erased you on the spot. You were a being who would twist the flow of the world, and removing such things is my duty."
My heart sank again. Those inverted eyes looked quietly down at me.
"You don't belong to this world. You're a foreign body that was never meant to exist."
"A foreign body..."
"Yes."
He continued, unhurried.
"You twist fate. You disrupt the current. In the end, you bring either ruin or catastrophe. So from the world's perspective, impurity is exactly what you are."
My breath caught.
"Then... why did you leave me alive?"
He regarded me in silence for a moment, then spoke.
"I saw your past."
"What?"
"Your memories. What you lost. Why you cling so desperately to your guilt."
I couldn't say a word. He smiled quietly.
"And even in front of the red-hooded mercenary, you never let go. Broken as far as a person can break — and still, to the very end, you tried to protect someone."
Yuri. The image of her collapsed and covered in blood flashed through my mind.
"That interested me."
"Interested you?"
"Yes."
The inverted eyes glimmered faintly.
"I've watched countless humans. Most of them, in the end, choose themselves first."
"..."
"But you didn't."
I had nothing to say to that.
Silence settled. Then, abruptly, he asked:
"Do you believe God exists?"
Out of nowhere.
"I don't."
"Why?"
"It's never been proven. And if God had existed, things wouldn't have turned out the way they did."
He smiled quietly.
"Interesting. Then let me ask the reverse. If an omnipotent, omniscient, and benevolent God exists — why do humans suffer?"
"..."
"Why do children die? Why are the good trampled underfoot? Why do the wicked live on, smiling?"
Those inverted eyes swayed slowly.
"If God cannot stop it, He is powerless. If He can stop it and simply watches, He is evil."
"The problem of evil..."
"Yes."
He smiled again, soft and quiet.
"And yet humans still want that kind of God. Even in the middle of suffering, they hope for salvation. They want someone to make their lives mean something."
"I have seen it. Some found their answer in the light. Others sought it from those called gods by others — or those who called themselves gods."
Silence.
Then:
"Have I talked too much about God? Then the reverse — why do humans do good?"
"What...?"
"Sacrifice without reward. Dying for someone else. Why do you think those things exist?"
I couldn't answer. He smiled quietly once more.
"Humans are contradictory. And that is the reason I exist. Some kill one person to save hundreds. Some burn the world for a single soul. They forge good from evil, and evil from good."
"What... the hell are you?"
He opened his mouth slowly.
"The will of the world. The river that runs beneath its floor."
"..."
"Or."
The inverted eyes flickered faintly.
"A fragment of God — the benevolent part."
My breath stopped. Instinct screamed. This was not human. Absolutely not.
"Then can I ask one thing?"
I said it low. Danaksuseon stopped walking.
"What is it?"
I frowned.
"If you're such an exceptional god, why did you erode me?"
Silence dropped hard. The black inverted pupils regarded me slowly. Strangely, he looked a little flustered.
"Ah..."
He gave a short laugh.
"So that was bothering you."
"Of course it was bothering me, you lunatic. My body starts moving on its own, I hear voices, the sword goes berserk — how am I supposed to not care?"
He laughed quietly, as if my anger didn't touch him at all.
"That was never the intended use."
"What?"
"I only placed a tiny fragment of myself inside you. A minimal safeguard, in case something went wrong — so you wouldn't die."
The moment I had blocked the mercenary's axe flashed through my mind. The sensation of my body moving on its own. The feeling of Repentance seizing hold of me.
"Then why did it turn out like that?"
"It was unexpected," he said evenly. "Your guilt ran far deeper than I anticipated. It resonated with Repentance too perfectly. Under normal circumstances, it would have remained a simple protective measure. But your mental state and the sword reacted to each other, and the erosion amplified."
"Hah..."
I dragged a hand down my face.
"So, stripping away all the grand talk — you're saying you made a mistake?"
A brief silence. Then:
"More or less."
He admitted it without resistance. I was speechless for a second.
"Wow. Are you actually a god? Gods make mistakes?"
"Even gods aren't perfect. More accurately, humans simply decide to call perfect beings 'gods.'"
"You're not supposed to say that about yourself."
He snorted a quiet laugh.
"Still, you survived in the end, didn't you?"
"That's true enough."
"So don't resent me too much."
"Is a real god allowed to have a personality this filthy?"
"Did you know? This isn't my personality. Strictly speaking, it's an imitation influenced by you. If you want someone to blame, blame your own nature."
That left me silent for a while.
Honestly, it still irritated me. But without that erosion, I might have genuinely died in that moment. And Yuri, too, probably...
"Hah..."
A sigh slipped out.
"This is screwed up on so many levels."
He smiled quietly.
"Which is why I've decided to test you."
"Test me?"
"Three trials."
He held up three fingers.
"Those trials will appear before you someday, like fate itself. You won't be able to avoid them."
"Why..."
"Because I need to see for myself whether you are a being who will twist the current — or a new possibility."
He looked toward one corner of the room. A large delivery box sat there, as if it had always been waiting. A completely ordinary box. Anyone glancing at it would assume it was a bulk order from online shopping.
"And what's that?"
"An ally. A being who will help you when the trials come."
"Inside a box? Seriously?"
"Surprisingly... yes."
He turned away. The light wavered. The space around him began to collapse. He was disappearing.
"Wait."
He stopped.
"The first trial is facing your sin. And the being inside that box will certainly be of use to you."
"Who is it?"
He didn't answer. He only smiled faintly.
"Fate is already in motion."
And then he was gone.
I stood there staring for a long time.
"Oh, for fuck's sake."
Will of the world, fragment of God — and then he just dumps a delivery box on me and vanishes?
I walked slowly toward the box. It really was ordinary. Shipping tape and all.
"What even is this."
Thud.
I nudged it lightly with my foot.
And then—
CRASH!!
Something thrashed hard inside the box.
"Uh...?"
I nudged it again.
THUD!!
From inside came the sound of someone struggling.
My eyes narrowed.
"Is there a person in there?"
I hesitated for a second. Then a hollow laugh escaped me.
"Well, the so-called will of the world probably didn't just stick a bomb in a box. Probably... right?"
A flicker of unease. No — with that bastard, he just might.
"Ah, whatever."
I tore the tape off.
Creak—
The box opened slowly.
And inside—
"You?"
Brown hair. Pale skin. A woman thrashing against the chair she was bound to, red thread-like restraints coiling around her arms and body. Crimson eyes flashed toward me.
"Mmph!! Mmmph!!"
It was Carmen.
She jerked her head up — and in the next instant—
CRASH!!
Carmen nearly toppled over chair and all, thrashing wildly.
"Hey, wait—"
"Mmph!! Mmmph!!"
"Just calm down—"
THUD!!
The chair actually went over.
"Wow... so this is the director of the Soul Healing Research Institute?"
I looked down at the fallen Carmen with a thoroughly incredulous expression. She kept wriggling on the floor, still thrashing. She genuinely looked like a bug.
"What are you doing."
"Mmph!! Mmph!!"
"Ugh, shut up."
In the end I sighed, hauled her upright again — and the second she was sitting, she started bucking all over again.
"Please just stay still."
I grabbed her head roughly to pin her in place. Carmen glared up at me with her eyes wide open.
"Why are you looking at me like that."
"Mmph!! Mmmph!!!"
"Ah... the mouth?"
Only then did I notice the tape over her lips.
"You could've led with that."
Carmen's eyes narrowed in pure disbelief.
Tsk.
I ripped the tape straight off.
Riiip!!
"Aaagh!!"
"Sorry."
"You do not look sorry!"
Carmen clutched at the edge of her eye and shouted. Then she whipped her head around, scanning the room, before locking back onto me.
"You... you're with him too, aren't you?"
"...What?"
Carmen's face twisted like she was about to cry.
"I really... I've been through so much... so many things happened...!"