Today, I Am a Lamborghini!
A greatsword-wielding female knight is the stuff of dreams and romance. In the logging grounds where trees should have been scattered about, goblin corpses were rolling around instead. Their severed and mangled bodies laid bare the gruesome horror of the scene.
“They’ve all become nice and quiet now.” As expected, the answer is always knowing how to use force.
“Um…”
The oldest-looking man among the captured people approached me.
“Are you all right?”
“Thank you for saving us. I thought we would spend the rest of our lives as those bastards’ slaves.”
“I’m glad you’re safe.”
They were the lucky ones. It was rare for people enslaved by monsters to still have all their limbs intact.
“Let’s get out of here quickly. It’ll be a headache if those guys notice something’s wrong and come swarming.”
“W-wait! There are still people left!”
“People left?”
“If you leave the forest over there, you’ll find a wooden castle. Our comrades are still trapped inside.”
“Comrades? Are you all perhaps…?”
“We were all mercenaries. We originally gathered to wipe out the goblin tribe that had settled in this area.”
According to the man, they had assembled for the subjugation only to fall victim to the goblins’ sudden ambush strategy and get taken captive.
“The lord of their tribe was a strange one. It seemed as intelligent as any human.”
“I saw that guy too. He was giving a speech to the goblins inside the castle. The ones listening looked completely fired up.”
“It’s strange. This western forest has always been relatively quiet.”
Apparently a bizarre goblin had suddenly appeared one day, and everything had turned into this.
“Anyway, let’s hurry and leave this place.”
“No. I’m sorry, but we’ll have to stay here.”
He refused while showing me his ankle. A deep gash marred his Achilles tendon.
“Those vile creatures cut our tendons. Walking is already difficult.”
Good grief. That meant they had been logging in that condition the entire time.
“You must have suffered terribly.”
“That’s why you should return to Dorua and call for reinforcements. We know a place to hide in this forest, so we’ll be fine.”
Something didn’t feel right. The man’s dark expression made it seem like he was lying.
Blocking the goblins in that condition would be nearly impossible.
They had already been defeated even when healthy. Facing the goblins in their current state would be a death sentence.
Should I really leave them behind?
Even if I sprint at full speed to request support, it’ll take time to come back.
Just gathering people and preparing would eat up a lot of time. In the meantime, they would almost certainly die—ninety percent chance.
What should I do?
While I was pondering, a large cart in the corner of my vision caught my eye.
“That’s it!”
“Huh?”
Ignoring the man’s confusion, I dashed to the cart.
“This should be able to carry everyone.”
I hurled the logs out of the cart and gestured at the dazed people.
“Hey! Get on!”
“…Yes?”
Ah, that’s not the right tone. I forcibly loaded the hobbling people into the cart.
“H-hey!”
“I’ll save you, so just quietly become cargo!”
“W-what is this!”
I tied up the struggling people securely and began pulling the cart.
“Today, I am a Lamborghini!”
Pulling the cart with one hand and swinging Arondight with the other to carve a path.
“Good heavens! You’re slicing trees in a single swing with a greatsword?”
There’s a saying for this. If something can’t be done with strength, maybe you just aren’t using enough strength.
“Overwhelming power! Crush! Everything!”
This is the true essence of Waldo-speak!
“Just who are you?”
“My identity isn’t important right now! We’re about to leave the forest, so hold on tight!”
I smashed through the trees and soon burst out of the forest. The plains spread out before us.
“I’m going to go full speed from here, so endure it even if your butts hurt!”
Even on the wide plains, rocks and pebbles were everywhere, making the cart bounce wildly.
Thanks to that, the passengers were on the verge of their rear ends catching fire.
“Oof!”
“Ack!”
“P-please slow down a little!”
“Yeehaw! Go!”
“Order up!”
“W-who are you?!”
The customers are loving my speed! Maximum velocity!
“Save us!”
“This isn’t right!”
People dying from pleasure at the high speed—this was the medieval fantasy version of a Lamborghini.
“Dear passengers! We have arrived!”
Before long we had crossed the plains and reached Dorua.
It felt like a brief moment, but it had actually taken quite some time.
“I’m not dead, right? I’m still alive?”
“My butt and waist are killing me.”
“It was fun. Will you give me another ride if I ask?”
“Shut up!”
Everyone was trembling except for the one person who had enjoyed it. Looks like they really loved my speed.
“What in the world is going on…?”
The guards stared at us with wide eyes. I explained the whole story to them.
“I see. So they’re the surviving mercenaries.”
“That’s right. We need to organize a subjugation force right away.”
“Please wait a moment. I’ll report to my superiors immediately.”
While the guards bustled about, I led the people to the nearby temple.
“This temple is still as busy as ever.”
Given Dorua’s nature as a frontier fortress city, there were inevitably many patients. The priests here were more specialized than any other healers because of it.
“These are minor injuries. I’ll treat them shortly. Please wait over there.”
Our turn was pushed back quite far. It was only natural. With so many patients whose lives hung in the balance, anyone who wasn’t actively dying was treated as a minor case.
“Whew, this is as far as I go. The rest is up to you.”
My involvement in caring for the rescued people ended here. There was no need for me to interfere any further.
“Thank you. I survived thanks to you. My name is Magne. May I ask yours?”
“I’m Nix. No family name.”
“Thank you, Lady Nix. Once I’ve recovered, I’ll come visit you.”
With those words, Magne fell asleep on the cot. The accumulated fatigue, psychological strain, and sudden exertion during the escape had finally caught up to him.
It was a forced march that would have been brutal even for an average mercenary.
Recovering fully from that state would probably take several months at least.
“Could you spare a moment?”
As I left the temple, several guards came looking for me.
“Where are we going?”
“I’ll guide you.”
The place they led me to was their outpost. Though it was called an outpost, given Dorua’s nature the guard force was quite large. In an emergency they too would have to become soldiers defending the walls.
“Please sit here. Hey, rookie! Bring our guest some tea.”
The youngest one suffers everywhere, as usual.
“Here you are.”
The tea the rookie brought was surprisingly decent.
“I assume you already know why we called you here.”
“It’s about the goblin subjugation, right?”
“Correct. Could we hear the full story?”
“Of course.”
I told them everything that had happened at the wooden castle: confirming the vanguard during the goblin subjugation, immediately launching reconnaissance upon noticing the anomaly, discovering the wooden castle and the highly intelligent Goblin Lord.
“A Goblin Lord… An entity that hasn’t appeared in a hundred years.”
“On the way back from reconnaissance I found people being used as logging slaves. I rescued them immediately. According to them, it seems there are still people left inside the wooden castle.”
“You’ve done excellent work. To think a simple tribal subjugation would turn into something this big.”
“What can you do? At least it didn’t escalate into a full disaster.”
“You’re right. It’s fortunate for us that we learned of their existence ahead of time.”
The image of a massive goblin army marching on the city was not something I wanted to imagine.
“We must organize the subjugation force immediately. Damn it, why did these incidents have to pile up at the worst possible time? The swamp region alone is already a headache.”
“How is the situation in the swamps? I heard people from the White Tower went to investigate.”
“Don’t even mention it. The poison in the swamp is so strong that even the mages of the illustrious White Tower are struggling.”
Good grief.
“Even those self-important blowhards are having a hard time?”
“Self-important blowhards? What does that mean?”
“It’s short for guys who act all high and mighty.”
“Short for guys who act all high and mighty? Hahaha! What an interesting way to put it. And it’s not entirely wrong. The White Tower mages did boast that they would handle the solution. Well, after failing, their faces turned bright red with embarrassment.”
That was a thoroughly satisfying outcome.
“But will you be able to organize a subjugation force in this situation?”
“Don’t worry. Dorua is a city accustomed to crises. We always keep a reserve force ready for emergencies.”
Looked like the higher-ups here weren’t just armchair theorists.
“They say every warning is written in blood.”
“Where did that come from?”
“It was written all over your face.”
Goodness. This man’s senses were quite sharp.
Well, you need at least that much discernment to be a guard captain.
The guard captain rose from his seat and saw me off.
“We’ve heard all the important details, so you may return now. On your way out, stop by the reception desk and collect your reward money.”
“Thanks for the tea. See you next time something comes up.”
“Take care.”
He was a sweet guard captain—as long as you weren’t a criminal.