My Sun Is Not You
“It is you, Anak.”
For a moment, I couldn’t grasp the meaning. I was part of his plan?
“…What do you mean?”
Gods never lie. Even if their words conceal ambiguity or hidden intent, they remain pure truth. That is the very honor and will of the divine.
“Why would I be part of your plan? Are you planning to take me hostage?”
I glanced at Granbipra. I had already been told he was gone, but it was worth checking again for traps or ambushes. Of course, Granbipra simply shook his head.
—Hostage? You of all people know such methods would never work, Anak.
At those barbed words and the look in his eyes, I found myself biting my lip without realizing it. It was not merely Alsh Unak’s gaze. Within those flames, Urshus’s eyes pierced through everything, watching every moment of my past as he spoke.
“…That doesn’t mean it was never effective.”
Memories I wished to forget flashed through my mind—Hyler, the few failures and bitter sacrifices that followed, and every choice I had made.
Alsh Unak and the gaze of Urshus within the flames looked upon me with a sickening satisfaction.
—I have already told you everything. From the very first moment you reached me.
“……!”
Only then did I understand what he meant. I remembered every word he had spoken during the Soul Link Ritual, and every answer I had given. Each single word. Each phrase. Even the way my emotions and soul had trembled in response—I remembered it all, without exception.
It had been an intensely unforgettable experience, and like my other nightmares, it was a scar I could never erase no matter how desperately I tried.
‘W-who are you?’
Even without a physical body, my consciousness trembled as I asked. Before that majestic, terrifyingly sacred blaze, before those eyes looking down upon me, I could do nothing else.
—My name is Urshus. My young priest. Your heart has reached me.
Urshus. No summoner was ignorant of that name. The demon god said to have been reached by the first Dark Priest. The crimson-black flames that led the Dark Priests.
—That flame. That soul of yours holds something amusing. Yes. You are certainly worthy of reaching me.
It was a sublime voice. The will of a god felt through a connected soul—whether that god was a legendary demon or not, whether this world was already in crisis because of the goddess Nyx—could never be rejected by mortals.
Merely being seen by that gaze, merely being acknowledged by him, was enough to pierce my soul and leave it swaying like a puppet on strings.
—Soul that has reached me. Do you desire power?
‘Yes.’
I answered without thinking. Even though I already knew the fate of the first Dark Priest. Even though I already knew what kind of being stood before me. It was not a conscious judgment or rational choice. It was as if he had drawn the answer directly from my heart—I was already replying.
—Then accept me. Speak my name and worship me. Act according to my will. If you do, I shall grant you power.
It would have been a lie to say I was unmoved. The power of a god. Even if I could never possess it in full, the power the first Dark Priest had received from Urshus was, as the records and legends described, something no ordinary summoner could ever dream of.
Urshus’s minions that could be summoned from the demon realm at will. Dominion over demons, though not comparable to a Demon King. And the strengthening of body and mana through connection with a divine being. With that power, I would surely be of help. Just like my other companions.
—Indeed. The foolish Nyx intends to return the middle realm itself to the great cycle, but I am different. Stop Nyx with my power. And become my agent in the middle realm.
Each word he spoke slowly eroded my soul. I could feel his power. The strength I would wield, the abilities I would gain, rose vividly in my mind as though they were already mine. It was a future that had not yet come, yet it appeared as clearly as the past that had already passed.
Countless people calling my name. Countless summoned beasts prostrating themselves before me. I existed within Urshus’s flames. The world was saved, and everyone worshipped me.
Wearing crimson papal robes, raising a jet-black staff high, I stood atop Urshus’s temple beneath a brilliantly shining sky—not hidden away like El Nergavil—and ruled as the true king of this world.
Yes. That was Urshus’s will. Urshus’s desire. I was already swept up in that will, intoxicated by that glory, merging with his consciousness.
—Accept me. I am your god. I am the true being who will lead you. Within my will, all your desires shall be rewarded. Everything you wish for will become yours, and you shall become the most noble existence among all mortals.
‘Everything……?’
Strangely enough, it was at that exact moment that I reclaimed a fragment of my will inside that dream, inside Urshus’s will that was eroding my consciousness and soul.
I thought of Rowell. I thought of Lauti. I thought of Medrup. I thought of Julian, Aegina, Orcan, and Bagloros. And I thought of all the others I had met—the sun, the moon, and the stars.
The most noble existence. At that single phrase, the intense illusions that had been filling my chest and consciousness just moments ago began to fade, as though a spell had been broken.
Nonsense. In that hazy consciousness, inside that illusion, I muttered to myself. Such glory should belong only to those who possess the worth to match it. I knew my own limits and shortcomings better than anyone. It was not a matter of power or circumstance. It was entirely my own problem.
Such glory did not suit me. No—such magnificent glory should never be granted to someone like me.
Those thoughts seemed to fill the gaps in my consciousness, and soon they erased every illusion within it. With that, I regained my reason.
How foolish. Forming a contract with a god. Did I truly not understand what that meant? Did I truly not understand what would happen the moment a mortal connected with such a vast will and mighty existence?
A god’s slightest thought flowing through the connected soul could shake a mortal’s soul even in a fleeting whim. In such a relationship, could a mortal truly preserve their own existence?
What had been the result of that first Dark Priest who reached Urshus? In the vision I had just seen—was that truly me? Was that truly my desire?
I had already seen it. I already knew. That was Urshus’s desire, not mine. While being assimilated and led by him, I merely harbored fragmented wishes and believed them to be my own.
‘I… refuse.’
I rejected him. While steadying my trembling soul, while desperately clinging to a consciousness that felt as though it would be swallowed by those flames at any moment, I spoke.
—Why? I will grant you power. I will save the world from Nyx.
The voice that reached me, the will that was transmitted, remained unchanged. It was so calm, and so divine. Yet beneath it, I could feel the god’s wrath burning.
—I can guide you. I can give you power.
Little by little, the temptation turned into coercion, and the gaze of those enormous eyes grew sharper.
—I am Urshus. Follow my will. My flames shall become your light and fulfill everything you desire.
I could feel his consciousness rising along my soul. Like an inescapable swamp, like the hands of the dead reaching out from a grave, it tried to seize my soul. I tried to end the Soul Link Ritual immediately, but my consciousness was already caught by Urshus and could not move.
—Follow me. Follow my will. I will lead you. Nyx’s threat will vanish, and people will call your name in reverence.
Once again, visions rose in my mind.
The scenes after the Great War. Behind me stood countless priests in crimson robes, and countless people knelt before me. They cried out my name. Enormous temples and palaces, countless jewels and gold coins, beautiful women—all of it was mine. Yes. Even the Empress of Silence, Lauti.
Countless summoned beasts and demons obeyed me, and Urshus’s mana filled my body with absolute power.
I reigned as the new king of the earth, and my will was Urshus’s will. Neither Orcan nor Bagloros could stand against me. Not even the Yellow Sage, Medrup. The Sage’s Tower collapsed, and the countless demons, summoned beasts, and soldiers who answered my call began to conquer the land.
Only Rowell and Aegina stood against me until the very end. Before Rowell’s sword, my soldiers, my summoned beasts, and the demon army following Urshus’s commands crumbled. The army was gradually annihilated, and the mana of Urshus that had filled my body gradually dispersed. And in that final battle, at the very last moment, Rowell’s sword tip finally touched my neck. The holy sword Grandias—that blade would take my life.
But they could never kill me. After a silence that felt like eternity, after a time in which the one holding the sword suffered more than the one at its tip, Rowell ultimately withdrew the blade he had pressed against my neck.
He was crying. Crying for my sins, for his own failure to stop me, and for those who had died. He was shouting something. I couldn’t hear the words, but the sorrow and pain reached me and pierced my chest.
That beautiful face had already lost all trace of its smile and vitality. The sun that had always illuminated and guided me was gone. With only the faint embers that had remained until the end, he had fought me until now—but at this very moment, even those last embers were extinguished in Rowell’s heart. His heart was completely dyed in despair and sorrow.
And at that moment, at the end of that radiant sun, at the true despair that had taken root in the hero’s heart, together with all the negative forces that had been created in this world because of me, my body was completed as a divine conduit.
Not the imperfect vessel that had failed to contain Nyx herself in the Tower of Destruction, but a passage that would bring Urshus’s power and will into this world.
I became a true aspect of Urshus, and according to the great Urshus’s will, divine power flowed through my body. And following Urshus’s will, a divine strike that flew from beyond the abyss pierced through Rowell’s body.
—I shall give you everything you desire.
‘…Nonsense!’
In that instant, all the illusions were torn away. Before I knew it, I was shouting. I didn’t know where such strength had come from, where such courage had come from, but before Urshus’s enormous flames, before that power eroding my entire consciousness and soul, I raged and shouted.
‘Crimson Flame God Urshus! I will not accept you! I will not serve you! I will not follow you! Your desires are not mine, and my wishes are not yours! The one who will illuminate me, the one who will guide me, is not you!’
I shouted with all my strength. I could feel the flames of my soul growing stronger, its light and its darkness both intensifying. The presence of Urshus that had been covering my consciousness and soul scattered, his consciousness receded, and even the connection that had held me began to loosen.
I could feel Urshus’s surprise. Though faint, I could sense his bewilderment. His flames grew stronger, and his will to seize me intensified. His flames covered the space around me as though they would burn me away at any moment, and countless black hands reached out as if to grab me.
But I did not retreat.
No matter how much of a god he was, even if I was facing one aspect of him through the soul connection, as long as my body and soul still belonged to the middle realm—even if he could overwhelm my consciousness and soul, even if he could cajole, tempt, and wound me—he could never possess or kill me without my consent in the end.
Before those flames, before those black wills, I shouted. Gathering every ounce of my will, using my entire soul, I cried out.
‘My sun is not you! You are not my sun! Leave me, Urshus! Do you truly believe that someone like you could defile my sun, my moon, my stars?!’