Butterfly Effect and Earth's Fiery Spice (2)
Can even a dragon be wounded by its own breath? That age-old conundrum has now been solved by modern life sciences.
Dragon's Breath. I picked it for the name, but damn if it doesn't live up to the hype.
"GRRAAAAAHHH!"
A blue dragon—not even the strongest of its kind—let out a deafening roar.
Usually, spicy food just makes you breathe fire from the toilet. Guess dragons are wired differently—they shoot it from their mouths.
I never intended to feed it something that extreme right from the start.
But Amelri told me: you build immunity to stimuli you've experienced.
If I gave it cheongyang peppers and it adapted to the heat, we'd be screwed.
Better to have too little than too much, sure, but after 30 years of waiting? Nah.
Honestly, I feel wronged. I didn't overdo it.
"Your friend gave such a vague explanation..."
It's a basic rule: the more ambiguous the request, the lower the odds of getting what you want.
-GRRAAAAAHHH!
Orellia, meanwhile, was blasting flames so fiercely I worried about acid reflux.
"When, oh when, will the dragon's sky-scorching wrath finally subside?"
I was quoting a classic line and enjoying the show when—
"Heeeyyy! Over hereee!"
Amelri came running from afar, flailing her arms wildly.
"Wh-what the hell did you give her to make my friend go berserk like that!?"
Service center inquiry right off the bat? Bold move.
Fine. I'll handle her like a call center rep.
"Pardon? I gave her the variety of Devil's Horn peppers you requested—one strong enough to prevent immunity buildup."
"But you didn't say it'd work this well!"
"Did you specify, when asking for Devil's Horns, exactly what level of effect would wake your friend?"
"Uh, no?"
"Then do you remember me warning you, after I tested one and flipped out, to handle them carefully?"
"Yes! I remember that!"
You're something else. I went full meltdown, and you still thought it'd be fine to feed it to her without a second thought.
"Unfortunately, this isn't something we can take responsibility for."
"N-no way!"
"Without specific criteria from you, I had no choice but to focus on achieving the goal."
"B-but... y-you said no side effects!"
Whoa! You really nailed that loophole.
"You're right. If I'd known it'd make a dragon rampage, that'd be squarely our fault."
"R-right? So hurry up and fix this..."
"But, customer—you did tell me your friend eats them, right? Did you mention she's a dragon?"
"Ah."
Don't mess with me. Compared to 21st-century Karens, you're a model customer.
"Sadly, there's nothing we can do in this case. Side effect warnings require detailed info."
"What do I do, what do I do, Orellia!"
Shouldn't you be worrying about the chaos near the Academy instead of your friend right now?
Wait. With her thrashing like that, is Silbi okay?
The original story never depicted fights directly.
There were moments needing force, but they got resolved off-screen.
"But then Iris showed up. Yeah, that settles it."
"Did someone call me?"
"Mom! You scared me!"
And just like that, Iris appeared.
"Never seen you jump like that before. Skipping formalities is fun, but how about dropping the honorifics altogether?"
She pulled a massive greatsword from subspace, grinning innocently—a total mismatch with the weapon—as she asked.
"No thanks. I'm just not the type to go casual with my elders..."
"I usually warm up by halving something nearby with this. Curious what I'll slice first this time?"
"On second thought, given our relationship with Iris here, casual speech feels right around the corner."
Super Greatsword. One of Iris's main weapons, rivaling the size of a house.
How do you argue with the person wielding that?
"Right? Hmm~ Academy students are fine. The chairman's got their backs."
"Thanks for the good news."
If the chairman's involved, Silbi's safe. He's top-tier in this world too.
Still, better check on her after this blows over. Head to the Academy then.
"Hang tight. I'll grab that thing."
"Grab it? You mean... Orellia!?"
"What's hard about catching a lizard? Wait here. I'll sell the materials to you, Grid."
She's ancient, near Dragon Lord level, but not against Iris. That elf gets shit done.
But I couldn't let it go that way, so I stopped Iris mid-leap.
"Please don't kill her, Iris."
"Huh? Why? She showed up near the Academy—I've got overtime confirmed today."
Tsk. Tough to dissuade her now. Can't exactly say it's my fault either.
"Remember when I said I'd grant you a wish? Make it two. Just subdue her."
"Hmm~. Grid, you know subduing's harder, right?"
"I know there's no real difference for you."
"Three. One won't cover costs."
"Two."
"Deal."
Sheesh, what am I, Aladdin's genie?
Extorting three meals tastier than bulgogi? Impressive.
"Back soon!"
-BOOM!
A massive boom cratered the pristine road beneath her feet as Iris rocketed upward.
How does a person make a sound like that on takeoff?
I was tempted to spectate the fight but approached the dumbfounded Amelri instead.
"Customer."
"Y-yes?"
"To protect our shop's reputation, I called in the Sword Saint for after-service."
"She's the Sword Saint!? Head of the Academy's swordsmanship department!?"
Skipping orientation too? Figures the protagonist's crew is full of slackers. Explains the bright future in the original.
"Yup. She paid five Free Wish Vouchers from our shop."
"B-but you just said two!"
Wait, when did she overhear that? Selective eavesdropping left me stunned.
"Two's right, technically. Base aid costs three, but dragon duty drops it to two."
"Eek!"
"So if I ever need a favor, please consider it positively."
No point shaking down Amelri—her family's broke. Why else sell 100-gold peppers for 1?
But her witch powers and protagonist halo? Can't ignore. Plant a debt, and it'll pay off someday.
"Of course, as shopkeeper, your visits are always welcome."
-BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! CRUNCH! BOOM!
I was about to negotiate more when skyward crashes pulled my gaze up.
"Almost done."
"Y-yes? Whoa! Orellia!"
Iris gleefully clubbing Orellia with the flat of her super greatsword.
Even for a dragon, this was one-sided.
World's strongest is unbeatable. The gap between top-tier and the top is like Pirate King vs. the Four Emperors.
-THUD! "Orellia!"
Orellia finally crashed after Iris's relentless beating.
Amelri rushed to her fallen friend.
"See? Told you it wouldn't take long."
Iris landed, stowing her greatsword.
"Just breath blasts made her easier than usual. Magic would've dragged it to ten minutes."
"Really?"
"Yeah. Ancient dragon-tier, but fought like a hatchling. Weird."
Did you beat up baby dragons too?
"Haha. Who are we to know a dragon's heart?"
Her clothes? Not a scorch mark, tear, or speck of dust.
I once wondered why Iris skips armor. Now I get it: why buff defense when nothing hits?
I approached Orellia with Iris.
"Orelliaaa! Orelliaaa!"
Amelri sobbing, hugging the dragon's head.
"What's that kid's deal with the dragon?"
"Says they're friends."
"A human and a dragon...?"
If the original says so, who are we to judge?
Orellia stirred, hearing the wails.
[Amelri...]
"O-Orellia! You okay?"
[What did I ever do to you?]
"What!?"
-Splat, splat.
Tears the size of human heads poured nonstop from Orellia.
"I... I! You said you'd sleep 30 years! They said stimuli would wake you, so I tried...!"
[My tongue's still burning. Can't speak.]
Poor thing—telepathy because it's too spicy. But coming to her senses first? Top 1% dragon material.
"Sorry! I'm sooo sorryyy! Waaahhh!"
And the incident wrapped up.
Ironic: an ancient dragon's rampage, yet the biggest damage was Iris's jump cratering the road.
"No harm done to anyone, so no need to finish her off. I'll report to the Academy."
"Thanks, Iris."
"No prob. I'll collect on those three wishes."
With that, Iris headed back.
Should check on Silbi too, but cleanup here wasn't done. Gotta do proper AS.
I sent Amelri to the Academy and, with Orellia's help, reached her lair.
"Hold on. I'll ease the pain."
Bought bulk vanilla ice cream tubs from the catalog and fed them to Orellia.
[Ooh, better now.]
"Milk proteins neutralize capsaicin."
[Spicy... flavor? This is 'flavor'?]
Ah, gotta start from basics?
"Technically nociception, but we call it flavor. Spices like pepper do the same."
[I see. You must be involved too.]
"To meet Amelri's expectations for waking you, I provided the strongest option. My apologies."
I bowed extra low. Orellia never aimed her breath at the ground even in frenzy—she'd understand.
[No. My fault for not realizing how deeply she valued our bond.]
Spice fading, Orellia finally opened her mouth a few times.
Her swollen lips looked pitiful.
"The process was chaotic, but your help delayed my 30-year slumber."
With that, she extended an arm toward me.
"Dragons never forget favors."
A layered magic circle bloomed in her palm. Something emerged, seeping into my body.
Protective spell: Blocks one life-threatening attack. Effective until lifespan's end.
Whoa! Ice block! Extra life coin!
"I can't thank you enough for such generosity."
I knelt, head bowed in gratitude.
"If Orellia ever needs anything, please visit our Eastern Everything Shop."
"I'll remember."
"Then I'll take my leave."
"Walking to the Academy takes over a day. Let me teleport you."
-Flash!
Her palm glowed once more. I blinked—and was at the Academy gates.
"But going in now... tricky."
It was evening. Dorms banned unpermitted outings after hours.
"Can't just head home either, feels off..."
What to do? As I pondered—
"You said within two weeks, but arriving day one saves the wait. Lucky."
The old gentleman from days ago appeared behind me.
"The chairman sensed you nearby and sent me to greet you."
"Really? I never said today."
Does it have to be today? One dragon's enough excitement.
"He said if you come today, no blame for the dragon-crippled schedule..."
"Leading the way, please."
He eyed me like what kind of guy is this? I kept my poker face.
Sue me. Vampires or not, I'm broke.