A Sudden Kiss and Lingering Regrets
I left a few disappointing words in the wake of the surprise kiss and stepped out of the room. Behind me came the sound of Dana bursting into loud sobs. My heart felt like it was being ripped in two, but I forced myself to ignore the pain, walked out, and closed the door firmly. Leaning my back against it, I let out a deep sigh. The cries spilling from inside the room were raw and heartbreaking. The urge to rush back in and comfort her swelled up so strongly I could barely contain it, yet I shoved the impulse down deep into my chest and held it there.
What I needed to do right now wasn’t to offer excuses and console her. It was to decide, once and for all, whether I would abandon everyone without a second thought and return to Earth the moment the chance appeared—or choose to stay in this world for good.
The very next day, Dana went silent. She wouldn’t meet my eyes even when we were in the same room, and she kept her lips sealed just as she had when we first met. The warmth and playful affection she had shown only toward me since we grew close had completely vanished. In the span of a single day she had returned to that blank, emotionless expression, as though her feelings had dried up and blown away. It was as cold as if she had declared our relationship over.
“Master, Master. I’ve brought your meal.”
Evynee entered the room carrying breakfast. A plate rested in her small hands. Haida followed right behind her with a tray loaded with several dishes. I thanked the two girls and began to eat, but Evynee lingered. She kept stealing glances at me, showing no sign of leaving. She pretended to be distracted, clearly waiting for her older sister to step out first. The moment Haida left the room, Evynee darted over and plopped down beside me.
“Hey, hey.”
She launched into an excited, adorably childish report. Innocent children are always bluntly honest and take great pride in tattling to their parents.
“Sister’s sick, I think.”
“Why? What’s wrong with her?”
“Blood is coming out of her body. It’s pouring and pouring.”
I nearly jumped out of my skin. Convinced Evynee had something urgent to show me and terrified that Haida might be seriously ill, I dropped my spoon and hurried out of the room.
I entered the bedroom the two sisters shared. Evynee opened the lowest drawer of the wardrobe, rummaged through the clothes, and eventually pulled out a small cloth pouch.
“What’s that?”
“Sister’s panties.”
“Panties?”
I frowned, completely lost. “Why are you showing me those?”
“Look!”
I opened the pouch without thinking. A strong, fishy odor hit me at once. Pinching my nose, I peered inside and saw several white undergarments rolled into tight balls—all of them stained with blood.
The moment I saw them, I understood. Thirteen-year-old Haida had finally begun her first period.
After listening to Evynee’s detailed account, I learned that Haida had thought she was deathly ill. Panicked, she had hidden the bleeding. Already quiet by nature and painfully shy, she hadn’t been able to confide in anyone and had suffered through it alone. She didn’t attend school, and with no parents to explain the changes that came with growing up, she must have been terrified.
I dragged a hand down my face and sighed heavily. You foolish girl.
“I’m sorry, Haida. Your master has been such a blind, pathetic man. If I had been a woman, I would have noticed and taught you beforehand…”
“Is Sister really sick?” Evynee asked, her small face full of worry.
If I nodded and told this innocent child yes, she looked ready to burst into tears. I stroked her head gently.
“Sister isn’t sick, so there’s no need to worry. The fact that blood sometimes comes from a woman’s body actually means she’s very healthy.”
“Really?”
“Yes.”
I offered her a reassuring smile and stood up.
I left the room and went straight to Jane. She was washing dishes in the kitchen. As the only woman in the household with experience raising children, she was the perfect person to ask. I explained the situation and requested her help.
“Yes, leave it to me.”
Jane nodded with a warm smile and led Haida—who had been helping in the kitchen—back into the bedroom. Roughly thirty minutes later they emerged. The moment I saw Haida’s face, relief washed over me. She was smiling brightly, her expression bright and unburdened.
“Could I speak with you for a moment?”
Jane pulled me aside into a quiet corner. Lowering her voice, she chuckled softly.
“Now that she’s had her first period, it’s time to think about marrying her off. If you’re too busy, shall I look into it for you? I know several aunts who attend regular gatherings. I could introduce a suitable male slave—seventeen to twenty years old would be appropriate.”
My eyes widened. “You want to marry her off already?”
“Of course. Slaves are married young. Children mean more hands to work. Right now it’s just one, but give her two or three babies and you’ll have that many more workers. From a master’s perspective, it’s ideal. If she bears a pretty daughter, you could even sell her for a high price.”
Because Jane was a commoner, her words carried the casual disregard of someone speaking about a lesser being. She spoke of slaves as if they were livestock. I had no desire to correct her worldview. Such attitudes were widespread throughout society; there was no changing it. This world simply worked that way.
“For now, let’s leave things as they are. I’ll find a husband for Haida myself.”
“As you wish. In any case, congratulations. With such a lovely face, her children are bound to be beautiful too.”
After Jane left, I remained alone in the corner, sinking deep into thought. Another worry had been added to the pile. This was becoming troublesome.
I can’t marry Haida off to a slave. To put my mind at ease, she needs to wed a man from a good family.
If I ever returned to Earth, Haida and Evynee would be left behind, lonely and unprotected. To secure their future, I needed to marry Haida off to a wealthy, dependable man as soon as possible. Only then could I leave this place with a clear conscience.
But where was I supposed to find a well-connected man willing to take a slave as his wife?
That day, Professor Judeban’s social dance lesson was held once again inside the inner castle. Both Adelia and Sinclair made appearances. Perhaps because she refused to suffer public humiliation before royalty and every noble in attendance, Adelia threw herself into the lesson with passion, wearing an elegant dress. This time Sinclair also attended in a dress.
“Everyone, please pay attention. We will now begin the lesson.”
Two hours later I lay sprawled on the floor like a dead man, gasping for breath. Having alternated as dance partner for both Adelia and Sinclair without a single break, I felt utterly drained.
“There are ladies present, yet you display such poor manners. Have you still not learned the proper etiquette for escorting a lady?”
Sinclair approached in a pale green dress and delivered her rebuke with sharp precision.
“No matter how exhausted you may be, how can you show such a slovenly appearance before a lady? How weak. To grow tired after merely dancing a few rounds—you really are pathetically frail.”
My relationship with Dana had been strained lately, leaving dark clouds hanging over my heart. In that foul mood, Sinclair’s nagging grated on my nerves. Normally I would have let the words wash over me, but with no patience left, the continuous scolding began to truly irritate me.
“Who told you to lie there? Have you foolishly forgotten what this body expects when it departs?”
The heat that had begun rising because of Sinclair now doubled as Adelia appeared and joined the scolding. Rebellion flared inside me. I shot to my feet.
“Fine. Come here and kiss me.”
Adelia lifted her chin with that familiar haughty expression and extended her right hand imperiously. She clearly expected the customary farewell kiss on the back of her hand.
Lately she had demanded the gesture both when we met and when we parted. In that moment, irritation boiled over. A hand kiss symbolized a gentleman’s respect and courteous treatment of a lady, but to someone like me—little more than a wild dog with no grasp of etiquette—it had always felt uncomfortably like swearing obedience. I had never liked it.
And now, while I was already depressed, both women had appeared together to poke at my raw nerves. A mischievous impulse took hold.
I seized the arm Adelia offered, yanked her forward, and pulled her into my arms. Before she could react, I pressed my mouth to her moist, soft lips.
“Mmph!”
Adelia’s eyes flew wide with shock. She pounded on my chest, struggling desperately, but I held her tight with both arms and kissed her with deliberate intent. I parted her lips and drove my tongue deep inside. Her own tongue flinched and tried to retreat, but I gave it nowhere to hide. Like a starving beast, my tongue ravaged every corner of her mouth, claiming her completely.
How does it taste, Adelia? I thought fiercely. This time I’ll give you a memory so vivid you’ll never demand a hand kiss again. I’ll crush those lips of yours.
“Oh! I have witnessed something unbelievable! T-this must be a dream. Yes, it is surely a dream! I-I cannot believe it. My Lady Adelia—my one and only Lady Adelia—kissing another man! Haaa…”
The shock proved too much for Sinclair. She fainted where she stood.
The instant I released Adelia, she slapped me across the face with surprising force.
“You filthy trash!”
The sting brought me back to my senses. I rubbed my burning cheek and smirked.
“How did it feel? Shall I do it again?”
“This body is a noble! You have just committed sexual harassment against a noble!”
“So? Are you going to kill me for it?”
My calm, fearless question made her pupils tremble violently. Without another word she spun on her heel and stormed out of the room. The door slammed shut with a thunderous bang, snapping me out of my daze. A wave of bitter regret crashed over me.
“Ah… I’ve really fucked up. Why the hell did I do that?”
I grimaced and raked a hand through my hair.
“They say holding back momentary anger leads to a happier life, but I’ve only made everything more complicated.”