17. Comparison

Countless scenes pass through my head in rapid succession.

In every single moment, there is only a pair of a man and a woman.

One of them is Eunji. But the other one is not me.

"Hoo...."

Every time I draw a deep breath, the scene projected by the delusion changes.

Ever since I finished the short phone call with Eunji, I haven't been able to move even a single step while sitting on the sofa.

The breasts, and the possibilities that could follow after that, are far too many.

"...It couldn't be. It won't be."

I trust Eunji. I have no reason not to trust her, nor any circumstances to doubt her.

However, the delusion speaks like this.

'The agony of the moment you realize your precious girlfriend lied to you will be extremely sweet.'

What if... even today, Eunji comes home and lies to me?

What if, in truth, even before calling me... no, even at the very moment she was on the phone with me,

she was already riding on top of Matthew-ssi's waist?

"Ah...."

.

...No.

I heard that if I try to soothe the delusion with ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠strong stimulation from the very beginning, I'll gradually become unable to be satisfied.

But it was also said that the delusion gradually builds tolerance to agony of similar intensity.

If so, what should I do to go just a little further from here?

What kind of favor should I ask of Eunji...?

"...Oppa?"

"......."

I raised my head at the sound of Eunji's voice calling me.

I didn't even hear the door open, but Eunji was already standing in the living room, looking at me.

"...You're back. Sorry. I was just lost in thought for a moment."

"Are you okay? I was a, a little late, right... I'm sorry."

"No, it's fine. First... wash your hands, change your clothes, and come over. Get comfortable."

"Ung."

The repetition of asking her like this, Eunji coming back, and just telling me stories is monotonous.

Even so, increasing the intensity of the act itself is also a little... scary for me.

...I need to try a slightly different approach.

I entered Eunji's room together ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠with Eunji, who had changed her clothes.

The purpose is, of course, to hear Eunji's story.

And though it's embarrassing... I don't intend to just listen.

"With my hand...?"

"...Yeah. I want to ask you to, would that be okay?"

"O-Of course it's okay, oppa! But I... have never done it with my hand before, so I'm not confident...."

"I understand that. You don't need to feel pressured."

As always, Eunji does not refuse my request.

Indeed... compared to the favors she has granted so far, this one belongs to the very easy category.

"...Then, sh-shall I do it...?"

"Please start comfortably. It would be nice if you could tell me in as much detail as possible, but... just relax."

"......."

With a slightly nervous expression, Eunji clings closely to my side as if pressing against me.

Her hand, approaching the dick exposed above my pants that I had pulled down in advance, touches it.

The touch cautiously wrapping around my dick is extremely soft.

"It doesn't h-hurt, right?"

"...Yeah."

"Phew... phew. Tell me if it hurts, oppa...?"

After taking a calm deep breath, Eunji's lips hesitate for a moment, but soon begin to move.

At the same time, the hand gripping my dick also slowly moves up... and then down again, stroking.

"So, after exercising... there's a room next to the gym where you can get a massage..."

"......."

"There, at first, I only took off my top, and Matthew-ssi sat behind me and touched my breasts."

"...And then?"

"Whenever he squeezed and massaged my breasts tightly with both hands... ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠his fingers sank deep into my breasts..."

Eunji's breasts are pressed against my torso.

The soft and squishy texture feels vivid, but Matthew-ssi must have enjoyed this to his heart's content with both hands.

And Eunji, while captured by those large, firm hands...

"...Y-You know, right? That my breasts are sensitive."

"Ha... Haa. I know."

"Like... flesh kept sticking out little by little between Matthew-ssi's fingers, and the shape kept deforming weirdly..."

"......."

"And the nipples too, because Matthew-ssi's palms are a bit rough... every time they grazed past, it just felt s-so good..."

Eunji slightly adjusts her posture and changes the shape of her hand gripping my dick.

Since it's her first time, a subtle awkwardness shows in her movements, but that in itself is stimulating in its own way.

"So... did you come? Just from having your breasts touched?"

"...I, I can lie, right...?"

"...Yeah."

"I... came."

"......."

"He grabbed my breasts with both hands and pulled them forward... the feeling gave me chills, so I asked him to wait a moment, right...?"

"...And then?"

I closed my eyes. Eunji's breasts being squished and pressed here and there in Matthew-ssi's large palms...

And the expression on Eunji's face as she tried to somehow hold back the climax that drew closer with unfamiliar pleasure.

I can imagine it.

"But Matthew-ssi said dragging it out too long wasn't good... and squeezed and pressed my breasts super, super tightly..."

"......."

"Holding both breasts entirely in his hands... he massaged them really hard. So, just like that, as I c-came..."

"As you came?"

"...I squ-squirted a little on the bed..."

A lie... Is it a lie?

When she finished the breast massage and called me, Eunji's breathing was very labored.

If it was that much, couldn't she have felt a climax intense enough to squirt?

"A-And after that..."

"W-Wait a moment."

I temporarily stopped Eunji.

Because right from the start, the soft hands stroking my dick rub-rub and Eunji's story alone put me in a state where it felt like I was about to cum.

However, ejaculating like this felt a bit lacking, regrettable, and a waste.

"...You said Matthew-ssi had an erection, right? From that point on."

"...Uh-huh."

"Go... go to my dick. Look at it up close... and compare them."

"......."

Even though Eunji is embarrassed, she grants my request this time as well.

Slowly raising her body, she moves a bit further down... and sits as if lying face down where my dick is located.

"...It's fine even if you mix in lies."

"C-Compare?"

"Yeah. Compare. In detail... please."

The one trembling was my voice.

Even though asking for such a comparison is just confirming my inferiority... I want that.

I want to hear from Eunji's own mouth that Matthew-ssi is superior to me.

"......."

What meaning is contained in Eunji's gaze as she quietly breathes out in front of my dick?

Every time the warm breath passing between her slightly parted lips touches my dick and disperses, a thrilling pleasure flashes through me.

"F-First of all... Matthew-ssi is a bit... bigger."

"...You mean I'm smaller?"

"Th-That's not what I mean...!"

"Just compare the two of them. Compared to Matthew-ssi... is it smaller?"

"...Yeah."

A chilling sense of defeat. The humiliation and shame of losing ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠as a man.

And pleasure. An addictive thrill.

"Ha... ah."

"A-Anyway! And after that... Matthew-ssi touched my p-pussy too. Just like you asked, oppa."

"...Yeah."

"His fingers are really... thick too, you know?"

"...Like a dick?"

"......."

"Tell... me."

"Y-Yeah. Like a dick... thick."

Eunji's pussy was poked and prodded by fingers as thick and long as a dick.

Surely... it must have felt good.

"As he sl-slowly went inside... he kept touching my breasts with his other hand."

"Did it feel good?"

"...It felt good."

"A lot?"

"Nn, ngh... Th-That's right, probably... I think it felt really good..."

Is this a lie?

Or maybe it's just admitting that it felt really good.

I don't know. This ambiguity... is so, so addictive.

Furthermore, the warm breath and exhalation touching my dick every time she speaks.

Matthew-ssi has already shoved his dick into Eunji's mouth and ejaculated several times... but I feel like I'm about to ejacualte from just this stimulation.

"Between Matthew-ssi's dick and mine... which one is thicker? Which one is longer?"

"Th-That's obviously your dick, oppa...!"

"...Then what about two of them? Two fingers."

"T-Two?"

So she has to ponder before giving an answer.

"...Probably M-Matthew-ssi's fingers."

"...Haa."

"B-But Matthew-ssi is so big in stature... and his hands are huge too. Should I say his natural frame is large...?"

Eunji doesn't seem to realize that making such excuses actually hammers down the overwhelming physical difference even more clearly.

Eunji's story of coming again as her pussy was penetrated by fingers roughly similar in length and thickness to my dick was not much different from my delusion.

It was a bit of... a relief. Because the method I devised seems to be effective after all.

And because it seemed Eunji also got plenty turned on and enjoyed it.

"And after that... did you suck his dick too?"

"Y-Yeah. Like you said, oppa... Matthew-ssi had an erection."

"From when?"

"...Probably right from when he touched my breasts at first...?"

So Eunji's body is attractive even to a retired hero like Matthew-ssi.

If such a person sincerely tried to take Eunji away from me, I wouldn't be able to... stop him.

"When you... sucked his dick, how did you do it?"

"I-It was just the same as when I do it for you, oppa! Like this, bowing my head..."

Eunji looks up at me and bows her head.

The feeling of her soft lips touching as they press against the glans feels good, definitely good, but—

"...!"

In an instant, my vision blurred.

All other surroundings remained the same... but my dick that Eunji's lips were touching became slightly different.

It's Matthew-ssi's dick from the photo Eunji showed me, the one she was sucking.

Eunji, placing her lips on that dick, remained still as if kissing the dick at first glance, but...

That unfamiliar yet sultry expression directed at me, and that... that hand is...

"H-Heok...!"

"Kyaak! O... Oppa?"

Suppressing the impulsive ejaculation caused by a convulsive sense of defeat was impossible.

In the vision that returned along with regained reality, there was my dick, and Eunji in front of it.

And on Eunji's face... I can see a bit of semen splattered and stuck there, which I had just pathetically ejaculated.

"...Sorry."

"...I-It's okay! I was doing it for you with my hand for a long time anyway."

"......."

"B-But still, oppa! If you came, you're a little... satisfied, right? Right?"

Eunji asks while looking at me, without even wiping off the semen on her face.

Seeing her even wear a faint smile, I couldn't bring myself to answer that I wasn't satisfied.

"Of course. It's thanks to you, Eunji."

"...That's a relief."

Although the delusion burst out for a moment at the end, there was still some gain of my own.

It isn't only the situation of potentially losing Eunji that brings agony and pleasure.

I've learned just how agonizing it is to have my inferiority in male hierarchy confirmed through my lover's own mouth.

...Before long, I might end up asking her for not just lies, but other words as well.

Besides, the thought of Eunji, who right now can't even swear properly, looking down on me is, more than I thought...

"...Ah."

"Ung? Why, oppa?"

"...It's nothing."