The Hidden Violet
Sumire bolted from Suzuki—no, from Kim Shin—like she was fleeing for her life. She flagged down the first taxi she saw and climbed in without a second thought. She couldn’t bear to stay there a moment longer. Or perhaps she was simply terrified that a flicker of rejection might appear in Shin’s eyes, so she ran without even looking back.
Her mind was a blur. By the time the taxi reached the beach, she had already spent tens of thousands of yen, but she didn’t have the presence of mind to care. She just kept walking. When a convenience store appeared, she bought alcohol and continued until she reached the boundary between city and nature. Ignoring the sand that slipped into her shoes, she sat where the waves couldn’t quite reach her.
She stared blankly at the dark sea at night.
Whoosh— Crash!
The sound of the waves soothed her chaotic heart, and the vast, open darkness of the ocean made something deep inside her sink even further.
“……”
Why is my life like this? Well, of course it is…
Poverty. A broken home. At school, people judged her by her looks and figure. Her natural blonde hair and skin that tanned easily under the sun were taken as proof of some cheap rumor, and those rumors were treated as fact. When she denied them, people only laughed. In rebellion, she did exactly what they accused her of. She stole the boy that the girl spreading those rumors liked, offering him just enough to make it happen. They never actually slept together, but that didn’t matter.
One foolish choice after another led her deeper into the swamp. Eventually, she reached compensated dating. It hadn’t been her intention at first, but the money had felt good. Just having dinner and chatting earned her tens of thousands of yen. Even a simple date added more. Little by little, she allowed hand-holding, then hugs. She grew intoxicated by the feeling of being wanted, and kept walking deeper into the swamp.
Even when the water reached her waist, she looked away. Even when it rose to her chest, her neck, her mouth and nose, she kept her eyes shut. The demands grew more explicit, the payments larger, but the more she accepted, the bigger the hole in her heart became. Money couldn’t fill it. Pouring wealth onto that dry ground was like pouring saltwater—each time it dried, the remaining salt only made the thirst worse.
She had wanted affection from those men, but the eyes that once looked at her like a flower with a sweet fragrance eventually turned to disgust, as if she were poison. Of course they did. It was only natural.
The bitter feeling rising in her chest made her down the alcohol in quick succession.
“Stupid bitch…”
She wasn’t even sure who the insult was aimed at. Was it for meeting Suzuki and calling him her husband? Or for running away from Shin because she feared he only wanted her body? For pretending to be a good person while hiding her true feelings?
The more her thoughts spiraled, the more the sadness surged up her throat. She tried to force it down, but it found another way out through her eyes. The dam broke.
Drip… Drip…
Tears streamed down her face without end.
It’s all over now. There’s no one left in this world who would ever look at her properly. This was her punishment for the life she’d lived. She had thrown away countless chances, and in the end, she had kicked away the very last one herself.
With a sigh, Sumire tried to stand on her drunken, unsteady legs, intending to find a motel. The moment she stumbled, a hand caught her from behind. She froze in shock. Even in this situation, she found herself thinking of him and felt pathetic. Still, a flicker of hope made her turn her head slowly.
“Are you all right?”
“…Yes. I’m sorry.”
The man had an innocent-looking face and a harmless expression. It wasn’t the face she had secretly hoped to see, so disappointment washed over her. She accepted that it was impossible and tried to soothe the ache in her chest.
When she tried to walk away, the man didn’t move. She looked up at him with a frown.
“Please move.”
“Ah. If it’s all right, would you like me to walk you home?”
She barely swallowed the urge to snap at him to get lost, but the displeasure showed clearly on her face.
“I’m fine. I come here often.”
Even after she refused, he still didn’t step aside. She glared at him.
“Ah. You came here looking for that, didn’t you? A new encounter. So don’t play hard to get.”
The presumptuous words made her stare at him. She had seen that look in men’s eyes countless times before. This time, she didn’t even feel angry—just resignation settling in her heart, telling her this was the only kind of life she could have. Then the man grabbed her wrist without permission.
“Come on, let’s just have a good time. A woman like you coming out to the beach dressed like that at this hour? You’re obviously hoping for something, right?”
That same old, tiresome pattern—arbitrary assumptions, prejudice, and coercion—made her snap.
“Let go of me, you bastard!”
“Tch… Ah, I get it. I’ve got plenty of money, so don’t worry.”
No matter what she said, he wouldn’t listen. It felt like talking to a wall. She slapped him across the face.
Smack!
His head jerked to the side. The man’s eyes turned red with rage as he raised his hand to strike her back. She stared at him without flinching, which only wounded his pride further. He swung down. She squeezed her eyes shut, bracing for the pain.
But the blow never came.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?!”
Startled by the furious voice, she slowly opened her eyes.
“Who the fuck do you think you’re raising your hand to?”
Shin stood right in front of her. She blinked in disbelief. The struggling man whose wrist Shin had grabbed didn’t even register. All she could see was Shin’s face, clear and vivid.
It was an expression she had never seen on him before—pure murderous intent directed at the man. Her heart pounded violently.
The man, pride wounded, threw a punch at Kim Shin. Without thinking, Sumire screamed.
“Shin! Watch out!”
Her warning was unnecessary. Kim Shin caught the man’s fist effortlessly.
“Y-you bastard! Let go! Aaaagh!!”
The man tried to swing again, but the crushing pressure on his captured fist forced him to his knees, screaming. Kim Shin looked down at him with an icy glare, then released the wrist like he was tossing away garbage. The man collapsed.
“Try that again,” Kim Shin said quietly, “and I’ll kill you.”
The sheer killing intent in his eyes—and the dormant poison within him—awoke and pressed down on the man. Terrified, the man scrambled away on all fours before stumbling to his feet and fleeing in disgrace, clutching his wrist.
Kim Shin watched until the man disappeared, then turned to Sumire. The terrifying aura vanished in an instant, replaced by worry. Her heart raced even harder.
She was moved by how concerned he looked, but whether it was the alcohol, the accumulated stress of the day, or the lingering fear, her body reacted first. Hysteria surged up to protect her.
“What, you think I’d be happy just because you showed up?”
Even though she was grateful he had come, her body moved on its own. She wanted to stop the words, but they poured out like a dam had broken.
“You disappear for two weeks, then suddenly show up like this and expect me to be happy?!”
She had missed him so much. Her body, beyond her control, shoved him away even as her heart screamed otherwise.
“You’re no different from that guy just now!”
That’s not true.
“Go ahead, touch me! Touch this useless body that only draws attention!”
She grabbed his hand and tried to press it to her chest, but when he resisted, she shouted again, voice cracking.
“Hah. You’re disgusted too, aren’t you? You don’t want to touch a whore who sold herself for money—!”
He must be sick of her by now…
Just as she was about to give up completely, her eyes met his. The moment she saw the look on Kim Shin’s face, the hysteria lost its grip and cowardly hid behind her again.
“Why… why are you making that face?”
Once her body surrendered control, her voice failed her. She couldn’t say anything. The pain, sadness, and wounds she carried were nothing compared to the hurt she saw in his eyes. She couldn’t speak.
In the silence that followed, he took a step closer and placed a hand on her shoulder. The hysteria tried to surge again, but his single sentence stopped it cold.
“You’ve had a hard time, haven’t you, Sumire noona?”
He pulled her into his arms, as if trying to hide her from the world.
“……”
At that action, both her body and heart fell silent. The hysteria and stress that had been raging inside her melted away. A different emotion rose to take their place. She bit her lip, trying to hold it back, but it was already too late.
“Shh. I’m sorry, Sumire noona. Today must have been really tough.”
It’s okay.
His gentle hand patted her back, understanding the feelings she hadn’t voiced. The dam finally broke. She burst into loud, childlike sobs, clinging to him like a child seeking comfort in a parent’s embrace. She grabbed fistfuls of his clothes and held on tightly, as if she would never let go again.